Touch Starved

The feast and sorting ceremony took place shortly after their arrival but it was different. The tables weren’t as full of students as they used to be. The air in the castle didn’t feel as warm. The night sky glamoured above them appeared dull and inky instead of dazzling and brilliant. McGonagall did her best at giving the opening statement, only managing to get choked up once while honoring the people who were no longer with them, but the whimsical energy wasn’t there. The magic wasn’t there.

Hermione glanced around to see if anyone else had noticed but it seemed like everyone was either happy to be getting back to normal or doing their best to ignore the differences completely. Neville was down by the first years talking animatedly while they hung on every word and Ginny had done her best to include her but eventually allowed her to slip into hermit mode after the fourth failed social exchange. Some of her fellow Gryffindors would blush and look away when she caught them staring, while others would get quiet if she attempted to engage in conversation. 

Why did she think this would be a good idea without Harry and Ron? She pushed the food around on her plate taking a few bites here and there as her mind raced. After what seemed like hours, the empty plates and glasses were cleared away and McGonagall was giving instructions for dismissal.

“Would the returning eighth year students please remain for an important announcement.” Her weathered voice called out before students and professors stood to exit.

Excited first years eagerly shuffled after their Prefects and were followed lazily by everyone else. Ginny gave her a smile and a thumbs up before she disappeared into the throng of students. Hermione understood McGonagall’s reasoning for not allowing her to join the eighth years even though Luna had been granted permission.

When the Hall was finally empty, she stood along with Neville and made her way to the front of the daises where McGonagall was waiting for them. She caught staggered movement from those who remained and focused on her breathing hoping to calm her nerves before the twelve of them were gathered up front. The nerves were a new thing for her, she frowned, were they? She added it to the extensive list of things she needed to delve further into while on her journey to self-discovery this year.

“I would like to start by saying: Welcome Back.” The Headmistress stated with precision. “It will be different, but I hope you all can find what it is you’re looking to accomplish this year.”

“Respectfully, Minerva,” Flint’s voice sliced through the space. Twelve sets of eyes whipped to where he was standing a few paces away from their group. 

“Professor McGonagall.” She corrected him with pinched lips and a razor sharp tone.

He waved a hand in front of himself dismissively, Hermione felt her blood begin to heat at the disrespect. “After sitting through the rather disgusting display of emotion and leadership tonight, I have decided I much prefer the alternative method of atonement that was offered to me.”

The Slytherins beside her shifted uncomfortably. Azkaban.

There was a stagnant pause before McGonagall tipped her head forward in an accepting nod. “As you wish, Mr. Flint.”

With a quick flick of her wand the sound of metal clanking echoed around them. Cuffs appeared on Flint’s wrists and ankles and he sneered up at her, baring his teeth. The heat within her evaporated and Hermione shuddered at the sight. Her parents would have too.

“Now,” McGonagall continued as if nothing happened, “Ms. Granger and I agreed earlier this summer that it might be best if you all have a bit of space to yourselves, as you are all old enough to be living on your own and,” she paused in effort to conjure up the right words, “have a different set of priorities than the other students. You are welcome to come and go in your House’s normal dormitories to mingle, but Ms. Granger has had a new one made for you to live in during your time here. Good luck on your first day of classes tomorrow.”

“Thank you, Professor.” Hermione pivoted to face the remaining eighth years plus Luna and minus Flint who McGonagall was now escorting out. “Right. Well. If you will follow me, please.”

She heard someone mutter something that sounded like an insult and a complaint at the same time but kept her eyes forward as she continued moving out of the Great Hall. Once in the hallways, she turned south and made her way to the back of the castle, two rights and a left carried her to the door of their recently manufactured common room. She approached the end of the hall and stepped up to the tall golden framed mirror hanging there, seeing herself and the silhouettes that had followed her in its reflection.

“The password is your name. The mirror will know if it is actually you or someone disguised as you. It will not let anyone in unless they live here or they are escorted by someone who does.” She explained.

“What about the professors?” Someone her asked.

She nodded at the reflection behind her, good question. “Professor McGonagall is the only one who can enter at her leisure. All others must be accompanied.”

When no other questions followed, she made eye contact with herself.

“Hermione Jean Granger.” She stated clearly and watched a wave ripple across the surface. The mirror transitioned from perfectly reflective to a filmy see-through and she stepped inside only coming to a stop once she entered the main living space.

“Granger, I knew you were mental, but I didn’t think you were St. Mungo’s status.” Pansy quipped as she stepped around her and turned in a circle surveying the space.

It was white. Other than the sandy stone floor, everything was white. There was no furniture. No art or tapestries. Just a blank canvas of a room with doorways leading to the bedrooms on the back wall and a rather unimpressive fireplace that was set in the wall to the right of the entrance.

“Charming.” Daphne spit.

“Yes, exactly.” She remembered to speak. “I’ve charmed it.” As if that one sentence would be enough to explain the sterile emptiness.

They were all inside now and the stares she received were a mixture of confusion and concern. She decided she didn't much like the latter. Susan Bones swallowed as she stepped toward her.

“Um, Hermione, are you feeling well?” the girl probed delicately while placing a weary hand on her shoulder.

Oh, her mind clicked, they didn’t fully understand!

“Yes! I’m sorry! I –“ she paused, bit the inside of her cheek and started again, “What I meant to say, was that I've charmed the room. It’s supposed to change, to redecorate, to fit us.” The eyes on her turned skeptical and calculating and it took everything in her not to fidget. 

She sighed in relief when the room started to purr around them. As if it had heard her explanation and remembered what it was supposed to do.

The stark white walls began breathing with color as muted earth tones billowed from the edges in toward the center like food coloring being dropped in a glass of water. It tested variations of beige and Hermione studied it while the paint shifted through a few hues trying to blend and brew the tastes of all the inhabitants together. She pulled her gaze from the walls and looked out of the corner of her eye to study everyone, eventually looking down at her shoes with a small smile. Every single one of them had looked like they were seeing magic for the first time, like it was their first year all over again. A proud warmth blossomed inside her and she felt some of the anxious weight release from her lungs.

Faint ruffling noises had her looking back up at the room she had work so diligently on for the last week. Researching, testing and perfecting all the charms necessary to make this possible. It had pushed her magic and she loved it.

The small buttons she had scattered on the floor began transfiguring into furniture and were tsking and humming as a human would while trying to solve a problem. Shifting through different fabrics and sizes, settling on a final product in some cases while other pieces continued, halting briefly before snapping in a different design direction as if offended by its own previous choice.

A loud crack had everyone jumping and spinning towards the fireplace. It had been small and less than desirable when they first entered but was now at least double the original size and hosted flame covered logs roaring with life. A thick wooden beam appeared just above, groaning it as it stretched to accommodate the new dimensions and then glossing a few shades darker. The large couch stationed in front of the fire seemed to find its happiness on a plush cream fabric and was shouldered by rich chocolate brown leather wingback chairs, one on either side with a sturdy looking coffee table relaxing squarely in front of the seating.

Hermione was about to open her mouth to tell them about their rooms when the wall behind her began vibrating with a high-pitched whine. She twirled to find the white brick materializing into glass panes before them. The enormous floor to ceiling windows, apart from the wide cushioned bench that morphed up from the floor, showed a gorgeous view of the grounds and Black Lake. Her breath caught. It was the perfect reading nook. Soft blankets and fluffy pillows appeared almost instantly, like the room was smiling at her.

A throat clear behind her dragging her out of her revelry.

“Hermione… this is…” Cho broke off, eyes glued to a desk stocked with plenty of writing supplies across the room.

“Lovely.” Luna finished lyrically. Her own gaze drawn towards the back of the common room that now held a second-floor balcony with a skylight and wooden bench swing suspending from the ceiling.

Both Blaise and Theo stood stunned as they watched a shelved nook carve out in the corner next to the fireplace, devious grins splitting their face when it popped and fizzled as it filled with crystal decanters and drink mixing supplies. She couldn’t help but roll her eyes. She should have known to make her charms school appropriate, but then again, she hadn’t expected them to be here. 

Pansy's mouth was slightly open in awe, Neville was turning slowly cataloging every potted plant, and Susan's eyes grew wider by the second until she spotted a piano next to Luna's swing. Goyle honestly looked like he didn't know what year it was and Daphne had schooled a bored and unimpressed look on her face, Hermione still caught her eyes roaming with curiosity despite it.

Everyone was looking in a different direction. Watching as the room transformed and provided a space for their own individual interests or serenity.

Everyone except for Malfoy.

She looked to him last and found that his cloudy eyes were on her instead of the room. He tilted his head slightly, silently studying her like she was a riddle and the words were printed in different languages. Something cold stroked against her mind.

“I wanted everyone to feel comfortable.” She found herself blurting. Eyes still locked with his.

Malfoy’s eyebrows pulled down as he narrowed his at her. The spell broke when he snapped his head away and proceeded to brush imaginary lint off his pristine designer robes. She inhaled deeply and shook herself mentally.

“Your beds are designed to do the same. Just sit on the one you want to claim as yours and it will adjust to your tastes.” Her voice found some strength, the warmth from most everyone’s pleasure in her work encouraging her. “Girls are to the left,” she pointed to an arched doorway on the back wall located on the left of the stairs to Luna’s balcony, “and boys to the right.” She finished, swinging her arm to the matching doorway on the far side.

Pansy was the first to move, throwing a greedy smile over her shoulder as she hurried in the direction of the girl’s dorm to get the first pick of beds. The rest of their roommates seemed to follow her lead and filtered into their respective sleeping quarters.

“It really is quite beautiful, Hermione.” Luna sang from the under the arch, taking one last sweep of the room with her eyes. 

“Thank you, Luna.”

Hermione closed her eyes and smiled at her first victory. The people she was going to be with for the next nine months were happy with her. She exhaled and turned to sit on her bench by the windows, opting to take a few moments to herself before being in an enclosed space with the people again. Unfortunately, something tangled with her foot before she had even made it two steps and she threw her hands out fully expecting to land on the floor. A firm grip caught her by the elbow and quickly hauled her upright.

“Watch it.” Malfoy snarled.

Hermione frowned down at the leg of a side table that had not been there a second ago and then up at him and then back down again. She opened her mouth to thank him, but he had already dropped her arm and was moving across the room and away from her before she could formulate the words. His hand flexing and clenching at his side as if touching her had burned him.

She took a shaky breath, the cold feeling she sensed earlier swept across her skin and sent a shiver running through her. She was still and always would be a just a silly Mudblood to him.