Chapter 8
Harry sat up suddenly, his head spinning from a dream. He rubbed his eyes and looked around. Malfoy was in the chair, reading his thick booklet, he was nearing the end. Harry had never felt so good. He couldn’t remember a day in his life where he wasn’t sore from sleeping in a cupboard, or playing quidditch, or fighting the dark lord, or something else. He was in an unbelievably happy mood.
“Well look who decided to rejoin us.” Draco closed the book and leaned towards Harry.
“What time is it?” Harry sat up, it was still dark out.
“It’s 8pm.”
“That’s not so bad.” Harry stretched and popped his back.
“It’s also Saturday.”
“I slept a whole day?”
“I was afraid I may have really killed you after all.” Malfoy mused. Harry let out a laugh and Malfoy handed his letter back.
“I suppose you don’t need to leave anyone a goodbye.” Harry took the paper from his hands as he spoke.
“This was just a letter for the ministry in case I died, so they would know I consented and your parole wouldn’t be jeopardized.” Harry shrugged and ripped it up.
“Oh.” Malfoy looked confused. “Why do that for me?”
“Why wouldn’t I?” Harry stood and walked to the door.
“Well, don’t you hate me?” Malfoy sat eager for an answer. Harry wasn’t sure at first but then realized that somewhere over the years the hate had faded away. Just like his love for Ginny had.
“What am I? Sixteen?” Harry shook his head. “Have you eaten?”
“No.”
“Let’s go.” Harry said without looking back to see if Draco would follow, though he could hear him doing so. He trodded down the stairs and pulled on some trainers. He opened the door and waited for Draco to step out first. After a moment of contemplation Malfoy moved to exit and they were walking down the street. Harry sucked in the night air until he felt like his lungs might burst. There was no dull ache in his ribs at the cold. He let out a laugh.
“Do you like Curry? I know a great place.” Harry asked. Draco only shrugged so they kept walking. Harry entered the small restaurant front and ordered. With take out in hand they began the walk back. Instead of going inside Harry sat down on the steps. It was such a nice night and Harry was too full of energy to be pent up within the walls of the house. Draco joined him, still not speaking.
Harry handed him a container and then opened his own. He devoured the food like he had never eaten before. Malfoy sat quietly, holding his container.
“Not hungry?” Harry wondered.
“I’ve never done this before.”
“Done what?”
“Eaten on a stoop, or eaten curry, or eaten with you…” Draco trailed off. He seemed uncertain about the whole venture.
“Well go on then.” Harry smiled. Draco opened the container and took a small bite. Then he took another, and another, and Harry thought he seemed to relax.
“See, it’s not so bad.” Harry teased.
“The food I’ll admit is delicious, as for the company I've had better kept.” Draco snapped back, annoyed. Harry rolled his eyes. When they had finished the night air was beginning to be filled with tiny ice droplets and they headed inside. Harry headed to his office, he was too well rested to go back to bed just yet. He plopped down into the remaining chair and switched on the television.
“You should rest more.” Draco said from the door frame.
“Honestly Malfoy, I’ve had just about as much rest as I can take.” Harry put on a rerun marathon and slumped down further. “You can join me, if you put my furniture back where it belongs.”
Malfoy contemplated and then left the room. Whether he was going to get the other chair or just going, Harry couldn’t guess. Eventually he did return with the chair floating gently before him. Harry was pleased to have the company, and secretly very pleased that the company was Draco.
“It’s very impressive to see you use wandless magic.” Harry commented. He meant to only think the thought, not let it out. Draco’s ears pricked red just for a moment before he answered.
“Well I have to be creative since I’m not allowed to have a wand now don’t I?” He sneered.
“Can’t I just get a thank you? It’s not like I made the terms of your parole. In fact, in case you forgot I spoke for you at your hearing.”
“Oh I can’t forget that now can I? Being beholden to the one person who hates me the most? You’re right, I do owe you a thank you. Thank you for tormenting me so.” Draco slammed the chair down.
“How many times do I have to say I don’t hate you?”
“Oh please.” Draco turned to leave. Harry stood and grabbed his wrist.
“I don’t.” Harry said as earnestly he could. “I did once. You hated me too. That’s a long time ago, keep beating the dead horse if you want to but I won’t help you.” Harry let his arm go and sat back down. He was so tired of living in the past. He realized he wanted something new, something fresh, something more than his life gave him now. He wanted it desperately.
“Why are you trying so hard to forgive me?” Draco said is a worn and cautious whisper.
“Cause I’m hoping one day you’ll forgive me too.”
“For saving my life?”
“For not helping you. Your mum has shared things with me, things that make me think you may have been as cursed as the rest of us and more than that, alone.” Neither spoke for a long moment.
“Have I told you I’d like you to quit talking to my mother?” Malfoy seemed to soften, only slightly.
“I believe you mentioned it.” Harry laughed. Draco sat down and stared at the television. They sat in silence and let their confessions grow farther and farther away.
“What’s a Vicar?” Malfoy said after a few episodes.
“Have you learned anything about muggles in the past few years?”
“Not really.”
“Then I’m not sure I can describe it to you.” Harry chuckled. They watched again in silence until Harry heard a faint snoring sound from next to him. Asleep Malfoy looked weathered and fragile, not at all like his buttoned up demeanor. Draco’s mouth parted slightly as he drew in a breath and Harry stared very long at the curve of his lips. He shook his head, eager to erase the blushing thoughts and turned back to the tv.
Harry yawned and decided to turn in at last. He looked at Malfoy, he couldn’t very well leave him to sleep in a chair all night. Very carefully Harry lifted Draco and carried him down the hall.
This is normal. He thought. I would do this for anyone…. I would do this for Ron. He lied.
Malfoy’s head curled into Harry’s chest and his heart thumped against his ribs. Slowly as to not wake him, Harry laid Draco down on the bed and dragged a quilt over him.
It was perfect until Harry realized he would now have to either sleep next to Malfoy or down on the couch. Inside, his twelve year old self was begging for the former. It was a chance to lay next to his old secret crush. With a sigh Harry went downstairs and stretched out on the sofa. His thoughts drifted lazily and his dreams seemed unusually full of bright haired boys.
A scream startled Harry and he fell from the couch. His brain scrambled as he pushed off the floor and ran for the stairs. Throwing open the door to his room he heard a strangled plea.
“Please don’t.”
“Draco?” Harry called stepping into the darkness.
“Don’t, don’t I’m sorry.”
Harry walked carefully and knelt by the bed to turn on the side lamp. Draco’s eyes opened and he looked around cautiously. Harry wasn’t sure if he was still dreaming or not so he stayed very still. Finally Draco’s eyes found Harry’s. They looked wet and Harry had an urge to wipe the tears from the other man’s face. He kept his hands on his knees instead.
“It was just a nightmare.” Harry tried to console him.
“I know that Potter!” Draco snapped back. His face was twisted in anger instead of the soft scared expression it had been a moment ago.
“Alright then.” Harry stood and reached to turn off the light.
“Leave it.” Draco whispered and Harry could see his vulnerability once more. Harry only nodded and shut the door behind him. He stood a minute in the hallways and heard a soft crying begin in the room. He laid his hand against the door.
“Do you want some tea?” He asked gently. There was no answer. Eventually Harry walked back down the stairs and laid on the couch. He was too troubled to sleep now.