Valentines
Classes had started again and Valentine’s Day was quickly approaching. Lirum found themself studying with Percy any time they weren’t in class or giving lessons in charms and potions to their under class men. Luna upon finding out Lirum was giving lessons had asked to join, and poor Neville had been too awkward to decline. The lessons had been going smoothly aside from the occasional wrong ingredient being added, or a plumb of smoke from a cauldron that wasn’t meant to be smoking at all when Neville caught sight of a Professor.
Lockhart had been parading around the castle bragging about how he’d scared off whoever was attacking the students. Which left Lirum even more unamused with him than normal. As unlike him they knew it wasn’t a who attacking the students, but a what. They’d seen the serpent themself after all and he had done nothing. Lirum finally understood the utter disdain Snape, McGonagall and Flitwick seemed to have for him. Then it grew worse when he made his announcement to the great hall on Valentine’s Day morning. He’d been dressed head to toe in a solid obnoxious pink. The room had been covered in ghastly large pink flowers decorations as heat shaped confetti fall from the ceiling.
“Happy Valentine’s Day! And may I thank the forty six people who have so far sent me cards! Yes, I have taken the liberty of arranging this little surprise for you all, and it doesn’t end here!” He clapped and then, in walked a dozen dwarves who looked about as happy about the Cupid costumes they where forced to wear as Professor Snape did looking at Lockhart. The costumes were complete with golden wings and harps.
“Oh, this is gonna be bloody brilliant!” Fred said, watching them march through the room. Lirum could practically see the trouble he was planning in his eyes.
“Oh, Rowena help me.” Lirum said, head hitting the table.
“My friend, card carrying cupids!” Lockhart beamed. “They will be roving around the school today delivering your valentines! and the fun doesn’t stop here! I’m sure my colleagues will want to enter into the spirit of the occasion! Why not ask Professor Snape to show you how to whip up a love potion, and while you're at it Professor Flitwick knows more about entrancing enchantments than any wizard I’ve ever met, the sly old dog. Professor Flitwicks head fell into his hands, clearly wanting no part in this, and Professor Snape looked as though he’d cursed the first person who asked.
“Yeah!” The twins cheered together.
“Oh no. Well, at least I don’t have much to worry about, I’ve never received any.” Lirum mumbled Not lifting their head.
“I wouldn’t say that? I can think of at least three you’ll get this year. If we’re not counting the ones from friends.” Luna said, taking a bite of her breakfast.
“What do you mean not counting the ones from friends?” Lirum asked, turning towards Luna.
“She means people like you, and you're too oblivious to notice.” George said, leaning back to whisper to them.
“I am not oblivious!” Lirum argued, turning towards the Gryffindor table.
“If you weren’t oblivious you’d know you’re getting at least three real valentine’s and then mine Cedric’s and Neville's platonic valentines.” Luna said sweetly.
“That’s ridiculous! I will not!” Lirum argued.
“Yes you will.” Fred started, “You’re gonna hate every second of it.” George finished.
“You know they’d hate it, yet you’re still going to do it?” Percy asked, eyebrows twitching.
“Oh, so you’re going to write me fake valentines as a prank! So original!.” Lirum said, exhausted.
“No, who said they’d be fake?” Fred argued, turning around to face them crossing his arms.
“Fred you’ve been doing this bit since last year, I’m not falling for it.” Lirum said picking up a few pieces of fruit to shove in their bag for later.
“What bit?” George asked, also turning around to face Lirum.
“This whole pretending to be in love with me for a cheap laugh. It wasn’t really funny to begin with and I know you never really liked me. The pranks not gonna work,” Lirum explained, wanting him to give it up already. Before they had to deal with getting harassed by dwarves for another stupid joke. “And even if it did the whole befriending the nerdy kid to make them fall for you as a joke because you’d never actually date someone like that’s really low.”
“W-what…” Fred asked, almost seeming hurt. For a moment they questioned if they were wrong, but it was quickly waved off by his teasing smile. “w-where did you even get that idea from?”
“The stupid pet names, ignoring me when I told you to stop using them, wrapping an arm around me just to sit there and tease me.” Lirum listed, rolling their eyes and when he tried to cut in. “Fred, last year you tried to say you’d been in love with me since first year. We’d never talked before last year.”
“That’s just flirting!” Fred argued, grip tight on his own arms. “And we absolutely had! We talked during the sorting ceremony!”
“All I remember from the sorting ceremony is you calling me scared and making fun of me for my hair telling me I ‘looked a little green’!” Lirum snapped done with Fred’s games.
“And you gave it right back to me you-“ he started.
“And that’s all it took to make you fall in love with me?” Lirum asked, glaring.
“Well, that was part of it!” He answered.
“Tell me one other time we talked! One time before third year other than that where you ‘fell for me’.” Lirum insisted, arms crossed waiting. “You can’t do it can you? Well unfortunately for you I’m not happy to be joke!” They finished grabbing their bag and heading to class.
“Lirum! Come back!” Fred called out from the Gryffindor table.
“Well maybe if you’d respected their wishes, they wouldn’t feel you see them as entertainment.” Lirum heard Percy snap as the doors closed behind them.
Lirum marched their way to the dungeons for their potions class. They took their seat and prepared their station ready for class before Professor Snape himself had arrived. When he did the ire Lockhart had earned still seemed to radiate from him. Almost as if he was looking for an excuse to be cruel. It came when one of the dwarves busted through the door mid lecture.
“A poem for Mr. Roger Davies. Gryffindors are red, Ravenclaws are blue, for now you chase the snitch, but you could chase this bitch.” A dwarf loudly announced, facing Davies who looked like he would rather dive into his cauldron.
The entire class tried their hardest to stifle their laughter while Professor Snape looked like Lirum would get to check off and learn the Unforgivable curses off of their to-do list for good.
“If you value your life, I suggest you exit my classroom, and do not interrupt again.” Snape sneered, as he took a step in the direction of the dwarf of ran in the other direction. As soon as he made it out of the door he was replaced by another.
“I have a sonnet for Lirum Ollivander-“ The dwarf started, Professor snape wiped back around prepared to dole out his vengeance when Lirum decided the best corse of action would be to evacuate to the halls, and the dwarf followed, mildly easing the Professors rage.
“I beg you now to hear my pleas,
For you I’d fall down to my knees,
I know you’ll never think it’s true,
But all I think about is you,
I never dared to draw you near,
When I held you it grew clear,
I wished that you were mine,
But I could never cross that line,
Still I can’t shake you from my mind,
And i’m not the only one you’ll find,
Though you have your pick of all the others,
I fear I’ll lose you to my brothers,
And though I feel like it’s unfair,
that’s the weight I’ll have to bear”
“That is actually really nice? And frustratingly vague? Are you sure that was that for me? Who sent this?” Lirum asked, staring at the dwarf who ran away without answering presumably to deliver his next valentine. “Hey! I-who sent that?”
Lirum looked up to see that passing the dwarf coming towards them was Percy walking down the hall. Class was about to end and he’d made his way here to escort them to Arithmancy.
“What are you doing out of class? And alone at that?” Percy questioned as his footsteps picked up speed.
“A dwarf came to read me a poem. Just after Professor Snape threatened the last one's life. I figured stepping out for a moment was the safest option.” Lirum jokes.
“Safe for the dwarf or you? You have finals coming up, and potions is one of the hardest! Not to mention the serpent is still on the loose just because there wasn’t an attack for a few weeks doesn’t mean we’re in the clear!” Percy fretted, looking around as class was released. “Let’s get going, can’t have you late to class and that’s almost eight floors to clime. The pair walked up the stairs out of the dungeons and began climbing the grand staircase.
“What did the dwarf say?” Percy asked a bit awkwardly as he led the way up the stairs.
“He read me a poem someone supposedly wrote me about being in love but knowing we won’t end up together because I’ll choose their brothers?” Percy seemed to choke on air hearing that.
“You’re joking? He didn’t actually write that, did he?” Percy asked, turning back towards Lirum coming to a full stop.
“Why couldn’t it be a girl? Girls could like me you know!” Lirum argued, crossing their arms.
“Do you prefer the company of women?” Percy asked sheepishly.
“I mean, I wouldn’t say no just because she’s a woman.” Lirum shrugged, leaning against the rail.
“So you do prefer the company of men?” He questioned.
“I-“
“Oi’ Lirum Ollivander, I’ve got a haiku for you.” A dwarf looking worse for wear yelled running up the stairs toward them.
“Let’s go, quickly.” Percy said attempting to pull Lirum up the stairs behind him only for the stairs to start changing directions leaving the pair trapped in the stairs with the dwarf. The pair just looked at each other accepting their fate.
“It reads,
You are not a joke
My love for you is real
Be my partner please
F.G.W.”
As the dwarf finished Lirum could hear Percy mumbling to himself. As the stairs slowly came to a stop.
“I guess we’ll be going this way.” Percy grumbled leading the way toward Professor Vectors class.
As the two entered the fifth floor corridor they saw a commotion stirring and a crowd of first years gathering around something. Suddenly a dwarf grabbed Harry’s back contents spilling out across the floor. An ink well shattered, spilling scarlet ink in such a way it looked like a crime scene.
“What’s all this commotion!” Percy bellowed down the hall. The pair watched as it tackled Harry to the ground to give him his valentine.
“His eyes are as green as a fresh pickled toad, his hair is as dark as a black board I wish he were mine he’s really Devine the hero who conquered the dark Lord.”
“Oh, that’s mortifying! Suddenly mine aren’t so bad.” Lirum said, watching Percy tense up before calling out to the hall.
“Off you go, off you go, the bell rang five minutes ago, off to class, now-“ Percy said trying his best to disperse the crowd. “And you Malfoy-“
“I’ve got a valentine for Lirum Ollivander.” A dwarf called out from behind running towards the green haired ravenclaw.
“Again?!” Percy snapped watching the dwarf run closer.
“A love poem to be read aloud in person.
I read as a child a forest is ever changing.-“
“What?” Percy asked stiff as a board, but the dwarf continued
“That even though it is the same forest it has always been, even though it is right where you left it, even as you walk with the forest around you, it changes every step of the way. I read that they change you as well as it grows around you. Sometimes forests in all their verdant glory can wrap you in a sense of belonging and home where you’ll wish never to leave it again. You are my forest. I could be lost in you without remorse.”
“Wow, that’s really beautiful. Someone must think rather highly of me. Do you remember who sent it? Did you catch a name?” The dwarf began running away but turned back to call out.
“A ginger boy was arguing something awful with another that looked just like em!” He said as he disappeared down the hall.
“There's no way right?” Lirum asked turning back towards Percy who was so red his ears where scarlet. “He couldn’t have right? I couldn’t have gotten them out of order? They couldn’t all be from him right?”
“Whatever you’re thinking, no.” Percy said snapping Lirum out of their daze.
“Really, I mean it’s quite sweet? Maybe I shouldn’t have been so harsh in him?” Lirum asked again, wondering if Fred really had gone out of his way to send them multiple valentines.
“No! He didn’t write that!” Percy stopped them from continuing “It’s not from Fred!”
“But how can you be-“ Lirum started only to get cut off.
“H-he signed his remember.” Percy explained.
“Percy theirs not many gingers about.” Lirum laughed.
“M-maybe it was George, he’s smart, and a lot nicer, he cares? It should be him? Just not Fred. If it has to be one of them, not him.” He answered a bit strained.
“Perce? Are you alright?” Lirum asked, looking up at their older friend.
“Me? Yeah, I’ll be fine.” He said solemnly.
“Wonder what potters written in this?” Malfoy said, holding up a book. Percy sighed before turning back to the boys.
“Hand it over, Malfoy,” Percy said sternly, doing his best to muster his prefect persona.
“When I’ve had a look,” Malfoy taunted, waving the book at Harry.
“As a school prefect-“ Percy started before Harry cut him off with a flash of light sending Malfoy flying.
“Expelliarmus!“ The diary flew through the air and Ron was able to catch it easily.
“Harry!”Percy snapped, “No magic in the corridors. I’ll have to report this, you know!”
“I don’t think Potter liked your valentine much!” Malfoy mocked, pointing at Ginny who hid her face running into her classroom.
“Oh-“ Percy started reaching for his wand in his robes but this time it was Lirum’s turn to hold him back.
“Let’s get going before we’re late. We’ve got exams to study for remember.”