Chapter 11
It didn’t got better. Now Albus was the one keeping distance.
He was up all night watching Scorpius sleep—holding his hand. He didn’t want to let go, he wanted to keep him as close as possible.
These two weeks without him were killing Albus—he kept thinking about Scorpius, thinking about them together how it might be if they kissed.
That night, Albus realised something. Since he knows about Scorpius feelings, he wants to be around him the entire time—he wants to talk to him, maybe holding his hand, hug him and just be around him.
There’s no way to denial it anymore.
<3
February faded and the sun of march touched Albus skin while he’s sitting at the lake smoking a cigarette. Timothy lade down facing to the sky, his black curls were fallen down in his face over his sunglasses.
„Did it got any better?“ Timothy asked the young Potter
„No“ he said. „it’s hard to be friends with someone you fell in love with“ he exhaled the smoke of his fag and saw how it vanished I the air
„I know, I went through the same“ Albus knew already. At this point everyone knows that Timothy was deeply in Love with Sam and never admit it to her. „But this is different. You want him, he wants you, so what’s stopping you“
„A lot of things“ he said. „What if it doesn’t work out? There’s no way we could still be friends“
„My god, Albus, face it. Your friendship is already broken. You fight all the time, you barely spent time together anymore. When you talk, you fight. That’s not a healthy friendship, you‘re just hurting each other“ And it’s true. Albus has noticed it, they‘re not friends—they can barely have a normal conversation.
Scorpius was never his, but loosing him broke his heart. Albus starred into the shining lake and Timothy sat up. „Look mate“ he said and lade his hands on his friends shoulder. „There is a chance it might not work your with you. But you need to try it. If it’s not working then talk to each other, maybe find a compromise and you get through it“
„I can’t lose him“
„You already lost him, it’s time to get him back“
<3
Albus spent most of the day in Timothy‘s dormitory to actually study. Scorpius used to force him to study for the OWL‘s, but he never really did. And now that they‘ll probably never going to be friend again, it’s time to at least do something to make Scorpius proud. By the time he got back, Scorpius sat on his bed reading—as usual.
He didn’t even bothered to look at him— focus on his book.
Albus exhaled. „Hi“
„Hey“ he haven’t looked up. „Where have you been?“
„Timothy’s“ he said. „Studying“
Scorpius raised an eyebrow and finally looked at him—his blond curls grew so much it covering his eyes. „Good one“ he said.
„It’s true“
„Sure“
„Scorpius I’m being serious“
He decided to close his book and sit up. „You were studying?“
„Yes“
„The whole day?“
„Yes!“
„…I don’t believe you“
„fine, then don’t“ Albus took of his shirt and wanted to change in his pyjamas. „Why don’t you believe me?“ Scorpius looked at his hands, not because he didn’t wanted to look at him—but because he couldn’t.
Albus was standing without his shirt in the room and his cheeks got bright red. „Because—that’s not like you?“ Albus puts a shirt over his hand and Scorpius was able to look at him again.
„What am I like?“
„You know. You don’t study, you never did, so why now?“
„Because the OWL‘s are in less then two months“
„I know that, I’ve been studying for the past year“
„Just because you‘re studying so much your head is about to explode, doesn’t mean you‘re smarter than me“
„When did I say I was smarter then you?“ he asked offended. „Never in my life I have said that. You‘re putting words in my mouth“
„You haven’t said it, but you‘re thinking it“
„Oh so you can read minds now? Okay Edward Cullen, think what you want“
Albus lays his face in his hands and grounded loudly. „Jesus Christ! Why Are we always fighting?“
„We‘re not fighting“
„Yes we are! Since Christmas, we‘ve been arguing the entire time. I‘m tired Scorpius“ he said and sat down on his bed
„Then go to sleep“
„No, I’m tired of fighting“ he tried to put his next words together—it’s harder then he thought. The next thing he’s gonna say might destroy the friendship completely or save it—there’s no in between. „do you still like me?“
Scorpius moved nervous in his bed and looked at him. „What?“
„Do you still like me the way I read in your diary?“ There was a long pause between them.
„Albus—I-„
„Please do not lie“ he said. „I need to know the truth“ he stood up and stand in front of the bed were Scorpius was sitting
He’s playing with his fingernails and tried not to look at Albus. „Maybe“ he said quietly
„Why? I don’t Unterstand. Why do you like me?“
„What kind of question is that?“
„There are so many great people out there, and you like me?“
Now Scorpius stood up with an confidence he hadn’t showed in years. „I like you because of a lot of reasons“ he said. Scorpius was a few inches taller than him but he didn’t had to look down to face his eyes. „I like you because you put so much effort in me and because no one has given me so much comfort and support like you do“ Albus eyes started to shine by his words. „I like you because you always make me feel that I’m worth something and because you make me smile even when I almost forgot how to“ a weight relived Albus chest. „I like you because you have a huge and honest heart and I like every detail about you“
„Scorpius-„ he said quietly
„Please let me finish“ he said. „No one has ever made me feel that before and I like you because you are simply you“
While Scorpius was talking, they both haven’t noticed that they‘re standing closer together now. Albus couldn’t keep his eyes always from his and for a moment it felt like they were the only two people in the universe
„Scorpius?“ Albus whispered quietly
„Yes?“
The Potter puts both hands on Scorpius head and pulled him closer to a kiss. Their lips were touching and Scorpius thought that any second now he wakes up from a dream. Albus hands moved to his hair and messed it up while Scorpius wasn’t sure what he’s allowed to to with his hands and what not—so he just let them on Albus waist and maybe pull him a little closer.
They separated. Scorpius hands are still in his waist and Albus moved his hands on the back of his neck now
„I can’t stop thinking about you since I know“ Albus said. „I gaslight myself into thinking I don’t fancy you—I can’t fancy you. But it’s a lie“ Albus said. „I like you so much, Scorpius“
His smile was filled with hope. They kissed again—this time more intense. Scorpius moved his hands on his back and they both kept pulling each other closer
They both hoped it will never end.
<3
The day has come. Scorpius sat on the floor trying to get his breathing slowly. In the corridor, there were students reading all their notes all over again or throwing up
„Scor, breath, okay“ Albus was right in front of him holding his hand not caring if anyone sees it—they were busy anyways. „You got this okay, you were studying all year“
He nicked. „I know“ he said. Seeing Albus comforting him took away his fear
The last exams they have to do this year.
<3
The sun of July burned on their skin. Their hands started sweating while holding each other but they didn’t care.
„That year was not so bad“ Albus said. „I mean, the last few months weren’t so bad. The start was crap“
Scorpius laughed. „it’s not our fault that year started like that“ They were walking slowly around the lake. „do you still think of her?“
„Everyday“ Albus nicked.
„Me too“ he said. „is it gonna hurt forever?“
„I‘m afraid so“ Scorpius starts holding his hand even tighter. „But it’s gonna be alright“
Their fifth year is over, and even if it didn’t started like they planned, it still had a very good end.
Eudora and Timothy don’t know about anything thats going on between them—they think their just kept being friends. They haven’t saw the love that is glowing between Albus and Scorpius After all—Scorpius haven’t thought This will ever be reality, it was all just in his head. And now—he’s holding the boy he likes in his arms at night, feeling his lips on him, holding his hand when no one is watching and it’s a great feeling In that moment, he never felt happier.