Inconveniently Yours

Wicked (Movie 2024) Wicked - All Media Types Wicked - Schwartz/Holzman The Wicked Years Series - Gregory Maguire
F/F
F/M
M/M
Multi
G
Inconveniently Yours
Summary
Elphaba Thropp and Glinda Upland have been rivals since high school—Elphaba, the sharp-tongued, bookish outcast, and Glinda, the effortlessly popular queen of high society. Now, thanks to a cruel twist of fate, they’re stuck as roommates at the University of Shiz.Between passive-aggressive battles over their dorm, cutting insults, and lingering tension, their hatred is mutual… or so they tell themselves. But the more time they spend at war, the harder it is to ignore the heat beneath every argument. Everyone else sees it.Elphaba and Glinda? They’re still too busy pretending to hate each other to admit the truth.
All Chapters Forward

Sicky girl

Elphaba had felt it creeping in all day.

The warmth under her skin that had nothing to do with the temperature of the room.

The dull, aching pressure behind her eyes that made it harder to focus.

The way her fingers trembled every time she turned a page.

She knew what was happening.

She just refused to acknowledge it.

Because she didn’t get sick.

Except, of course, she did.

And Glinda knew it before she did.

“Elphie.”

Elphaba barely glanced up from her book. “Hm?”

Glinda was watching her, eyes narrowed, unimpressed, her arms folded neatly across her chest like she was waiting for something.

“You’re sick.”

Elphaba scoffed, turning the page. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

Glinda let out a slow breath through her nose.

Then—

She reached across the table, pressing her palm to Elphaba’s forehead.

Elphaba jerked away immediately, scowling as she swatted her hand back.

“Glinda, for Oz’s sake—”

“You’re burning up,” Glinda huffed, tone sharp with barely contained exasperation.

Elphaba gritted her teeth, forcing her focus back on the book in front of her.

“I’m fine.”

Glinda sat back, expression blank, lips pursed in that way that immediately made Elphaba uneasy.

Because Glinda Upland was many things, but passive was not one of them.

And Elphaba knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that she was about to—

“Fiyero.”

Elphaba stiffened instantly.

Fiyero, who had been flipping idly through a book, blinked up in surprise at the sudden call.

“Yeah?”

“Catch her.”

“What?”

Before Elphaba could even process the instruction, the ground swayed beneath her.

Her vision blurred, darkened, tilted—

And then—

Strong arms caught her before she even hit the floor.


“She is not fine,” Glinda seethed, already gathering up her bag as Fiyero shifted Elphaba’s weight, adjusting her against his chest.

Elphaba groaned weakly, trying to push him away, but her body felt entirely too heavy.

“Glinda, put me down,” she muttered, voice hoarse, half-lidded eyes barely focusing.

“First of all,” Fiyero said, grunting slightly as he adjusted his grip, “I’m not Glinda.”

“And second of all,” Glinda added, grabbing Elphaba’s bag and slinging it over her shoulder, “You’re coming with me.”

Elphaba tried to protest.

But the moment Fiyero took a step forward, the rocking motion of being carried made her stomach lurch, and she shut her mouth immediately to avoid tempting fate.

“Where are we taking her?” Fiyero asked as they moved toward the doors.

“Her dorm?” Boq guessed, trailing behind with Crope and Tibbett, who were watching the whole thing unfold like it was the best entertainment of their lives.

Glinda scoffed.

“Please. If I leave her there, she’ll just climb out of bed and pretend this never happened.”

Fiyero nodded thoughtfully, adjusting his hold. “So, your place, then?”

Glinda flipped her hair over her shoulder, smoothing down her skirt.

“Obviously.”


Elphaba wasn’t entirely unconscious when they got to Glinda’s apartment.

She was aware enough to know that Fiyero was still carrying her, aware enough to know that Glinda had unlocked the door, aware enough to catch the tail end of Crope whispering something about ‘carrying the bride over the threshold’ before Tibbett smacked him.

And, most of all—

She was aware enough to know that she had lost this fight.

“Put her in bed,” Glinda instructed, already moving ahead, switching on a lamp, pulling back the covers.

Fiyero obliged, lowering Elphaba onto the mattress with ease, keeping a hand on her shoulder as she swayed slightly.

“You okay there, Elphie?” he murmured.

Elphaba made a vague, unimpressed noise in the back of her throat.

Fiyero snorted and patted her shoulder before standing up.

Glinda waved him off toward the door, already unbuttoning Elphaba’s blazer and pushing it off her shoulders.

“I’ve got her from here, boys,” she said primly.

Crope, grinning, gave a mocking little bow before stepping back.

“Enjoy your honeymoon!”

The door shut before Glinda could throw something at him.


Elphaba was fading in and out of consciousness.

The warmth was suffocating, pressing behind her eyes, under her skin, making her limbs feel heavy and foreign.

She felt hands moving around her, blankets shifting.

And then—

A voice.

Soft. Familiar.

“You are so infuriating.”

Elphaba huffed weakly, tilting her head toward the sound.

Glinda.

She was sitting beside her, perched on the edge of the mattress, fingers combing absently through Elphaba’s hair.

Elphaba blinked sluggishly, her vision swimming, her mind foggy.

“You kidnapped me,” she mumbled.

Glinda smiled, brushing a damp strand of hair back from Elphaba’s forehead.

“You left me no choice.”

Elphaba exhaled heavily, eyes slipping shut again.

Glinda’s touch was gentle, soothing, and Elphaba didn’t pull away.


Elphaba was a furnace.

Glinda could feel the heat rolling off of her even fro where she was perched on the edge of the bed, Elphaba’s arm looped around her waist like a vice, refusing to let her move.

“Glinda,” Elphaba mumbled, voice thick with exhaustion, her nose nudging clumsily against Glinda’s side.

Glinda bit her lip, desperately trying not to laugh.

“Yes, Elphie?”

Elphaba hummed, content, half-buried in the pillow, her grip tightening around Glinda’s waist.

“You’re so pretty,” she sighed dreamily, like this was some life-altering realization that had only just occurred to her in this moment.

Glinda let out a quiet giggle, brushing her fingers through Elphaba’s damp hair, completely and utterly charmed.

“You’ve said that already.”

Elphaba blinked slowly, eyes glassy, her lips parted slightly, as if processing that information required monumental effort.

“…Did I?”

Glinda bit back a smile.

“Mmhm. Just a few minutes ago.”

Elphaba frowned, deeply troubled, her grip shifting slightly, clumsy fingers pressing into Glinda’s side like she needed to hold on tighter in order to think properly.

“Okay,” she said finally, her voice slow and deliberate, as if this was a Very Important Announcement.

“I’m saying it again.”

Glinda couldn’t help it—she laughed, reaching down to lace her fingers with Elphaba’s, squeezing lightly.

“Well, thank you, darling.”

Elphaba scoffed, dramatic, her brows pinching together like she was offended.

No,” she muttered gruffly, nuzzling her face further into Glinda’s side, clinging tighter.

“Not darling, the boys call me that.”

Glinda arched a brow, amused.

“Oh? And what should I call you?”

Elphaba was silent for a long moment, her breath warm against Glinda’s stomach, like she had forgotten how sentences worked.

Then—

“…Yours.”

Glinda froze.

And then—

She snorted.

Elphaba pouted, narrowing her eyes up at her, deeply unimpressed.

“That was very romantic,” she muttered grumpily, shifting to bury her burning face back against Glinda’s stomach.

Glinda, giggling uncontrollably, cupped the back of Elphaba’s head, stroking her hair fondly.

“Oh, I know,” she teased. “You’re very charming when you’re delirious.”

Elphaba huffed against her skin, grumbling something unintelligible, her hold around Glinda’s waist completely unbreakable.

Glinda shook her head fondly, gently nudging Elphaba’s shoulder.

“Come on, love,” she murmured. “You should sleep.”

Elphaba grunted in protest, pulling her closer instead of letting go.

“Can’t,” she mumbled. “Too busy thinking about how stunning you are.”

Glinda outright cackled, fully delighted.

“Elphie, you love me,” she reminded her. “You tell me I’m pretty all the time.”

Elphaba frowned again, like this was news to her.

“…Do I?”

“Yes, Elphie. You do.”

A pause.

“…I have excellent taste,” Elphaba mumbled, like she was very impressed with herself.

Glinda laughed again, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead, feeling Elphaba melt completely against her.

“Yes, my love,” she whispered. “You really do.”

Elphaba sighed deeply, nuzzling in even closer, completely and utterly content.

Glinda shook her head, heart brimming with warmth.

Fevered, clingy, ridiculously sappy Elphie was her new favorite thing.


Elphaba was miserable.

Not in the usual, everyday, general disdain for humanity way.

No, this was worse.

Her skin felt too hot, her limbs too heavy, and her head pounded in time with her heartbeat.

She must have looked awful too, because Glinda had been hovering since the moment she dragged her back to her apartment.

“Stop fussing,” Elphaba muttered from where she lay, buried under a blanket she hadn’t asked for.

Glinda huffed. “I’m not fussing. I’m taking care of you.”

“That’s worse.

Glinda rolled her eyes but didn’t argue. Instead, she set a bowl of soup on the coffee table and perched beside her, tucking her legs neatly underneath herself.

“Are you comfortable?” she asked.

Elphaba grunted.

She assumed that was enough of an answer, because Glinda just sighed and reached for her textbook.

Elphaba watched her for a moment, her brain too foggy to do much else.

Glinda, ever the dedicated student, had already flipped open her notes, her delicate script filling the margins.

Elphaba hated that her heart stuttered a little at the sight.

She let her head sink further into the pillow and closed her eyes.

The rhythmic scratch of Glinda’s pen filled the space between them.

And Elphaba drifted.

Almost.

Because Glinda shifted, flipping to a new page, and Elphaba’s eyes cracked open again.

She watched without meaning to.

Glinda was cross-legged beside her, lips pursed in concentration, soft curls falling over one shoulder.

It was distracting.

Too distracting.

Elphaba turned her head into the pillow.

“Read it to me.”

Glinda blinked. “What?”

“If you’re studying, you might as well read it out loud.” Elphaba shifted slightly, sinking deeper into the cushions. “Maybe I’ll absorb something.”

Glinda arched a brow. “Elphie, you’re sick.”

“And?”

“And you’re not actually listening.”

Elphaba scoffed. “Of course I am.”

Glinda gave her a look but didn’t argue.

Instead, she sighed and flipped back a page.

And then she started reading.

Something about ethics.

Elphaba, however, was not paying attention.

Not to the words, anyway.

Because Glinda had a voice made for storytelling.

Smooth and effortless, lilting like music, the kind of voice that stuck in your head long after hearing it.

And Elphaba wanted to listen forever.

She swallowed, shifting slightly, pressing her forehead into the pillow, but keeping her eyes closed.

She had always liked listening to Glinda talk.

Always.

But this was different.

This wasn’t a debate or a lesson or an argument—Glinda wasn’t even talking to her.

She was just…reading.

And still—Elphaba felt it everywhere.

She exhaled slowly, letting the cadence of Glinda’s words pull her under.

Her breathing evened out, her body relaxed.

The words blurred into something gentle and warm, filling the quiet space between them.

Without thinking, she shifted closer, her arm slipping around Glinda’s waist, fingers resting lightly against the curve of her hip.

Glinda didn’t react.

Didn’t pause.

Didn’t even acknowledge the way Elphaba had just gravitated toward her like it was instinct.

She just turned another page, voice steady and even, oblivious to the fact that Elphaba wasn’t retaining a single word.

Elphaba hummed, pretending.


Glinda smiled softly.

“You’re not listening, are you?”

Elphaba kept her eyes shut.

“I’m absorbing,” she mumbled.

Glinda sighed, amused.

“Hopeless,” she murmured fondly, shifting just slightly into Elphaba’s hold.

Elphaba almost smiled.

Glinda turned another page and kept reading.

And Elphaba, fully aware she was an idiot, let herself enjoy it.


Glinda had been reading for maybe ten minutes when she felt Elphaba shift again.

The arm around her tightened slightly, fingers pressing into the curve of her hip as Elphaba sighed, deep and slow.

“Glinda.”

Glinda hummed, turning the page. “Mhm?”

Elphaba didn’t answer right away.

Then—her voice, lower now, rough from exhaustion:

“You sound nice when you read.”

Glinda paused, glancing down.

Elphaba was half-buried in the pillows, face partially hidden, but there was something almost lazyabout the way she looked up at her.

Glinda narrowed her eyes.

“Elphie.”

“Mmm?”

“Are you fever-flirting with me?”

Elphaba let out a slow, smug exhale.

“I have no idea what you mean.”

Glinda sighed, unimpressed.

“Elphaba, you are literally delusional right now.”

Elphaba smirked, fingers tracing absent patterns against her waist.

“Still lucid enough to recognize beauty when I see it.”

Glinda blinked.

Then she shoved at her shoulder. “Oh, Oz. Go to sleep.”

Elphaba chuckled, slow and syrupy.

“You love my voice,” Glinda muttered, flipping another page aggressively.

“Mmm. I do.

Glinda froze.

She stared at the book in her lap, suddenly unable to focus on the words.

Because Elphaba hadn’t said that to tease her.

Hadn’t said it with any bite or any challenge—she had just said it.

Matter-of-fact.

Like it was obvious.

Glinda cleared her throat.

“You are delusional.”

Elphaba didn’t deny it.

Instead, she just exhaled deeply, shifting once more—and suddenly, Glinda felt her nose press into her side.

Glinda’s breath caught.

Elphaba sighed.

“Warm,” she mumbled, muffled against the fabric of Glinda’s sweater.

Glinda glanced down again.

Elphaba’s eyes were shut now, face half-buried in her stomach, her fingers still loosely curled around her waist.

Glinda huffed softly, feeling something almost unbearably fond uncurl in her chest.

“This is embarrassing for you,” she informed her, gently brushing stray strands of dark hair back from her forehead.

Elphaba just hummed.

Glinda sighed, setting her book aside, adjusting her position slightly.

Her fingers drifted down, resting over Elphaba’s hand, squeezing lightly.

“Move over.”

Elphaba made a grumbly, incoherent noise but shifted just enough to make room.

Glinda slipped down beside her, tugging the blanket over them both.

The second she got comfortable, Elphaba’s fingers curled into the fabric of her sweater.

Glinda sighed softly, tilting her head down to press a kiss to Elphaba’s forehead.

Then another.

And another.

Elphaba’s lips curved faintly.

Glinda smiled against her skin.

“Better?” she whispered.

Elphaba exhaled deeply, her body fully relaxing.

“Yeah,” she murmured, already half-asleep.

Glinda tucked herself closer, fingers dragging lightly through dark, damp strands.

“Get some sleep, Elphie.”

Elphaba’s grip loosened slightly, breath already evening out.

And Glinda followed soon after.


Elphaba was still asleep when Glinda shifted beside her.

Which—was rare.

Elphaba always woke up first.

Even when she had been delirious with fever, she still hadn’t fully let herself relax.

But now?

Now she was warm and sprawled out, her breath steady, her face tucked into the pillow, her grip around Glinda’s waist loose but still there.

And for a moment, Glinda just watched her.

Elphaba didn’t look sharp like this.

Didn’t look like the girl who always had a retort ready, who carried the weight of the world between her shoulders, who was so careful about what she let people see.

She just looked… peaceful.

And Glinda’s heart did something absolutely awful in her chest.

Because she was gone.

Fully, completely, hopelessly gone.

And, well.

She had never been particularly good at restraint.

So she leaned down, pressing the softest kiss to Elphaba’s cheek.

Then another—right at the corner of her mouth.

And a third—this time fully on her lips.

Elphaba stirred, exhaling slowly, her fingers twitching where they still rested against Glinda’s waist.

Glinda smiled against her lips.

“Good morning, sleepyhead.”

Elphaba made a quiet noise, something almost like a hum, before she finally blinked her eyes open.

She was still tired, clearly, but she tilted her chin just slightly, just enough to press a slow, lazy kissback.

Glinda’s breath hitched.

Elphaba smirked.

Glinda squinted at her.

“You’re fine, aren’t you?”

Elphaba stretched, rolling her shoulders.

“I feel fantastic, actually.”

Glinda huffed, flopping onto her back.

“You’re impossible.”

Elphaba grinned, shifting onto her side to face her.

“You love me.”

Glinda sighed dramatically, tilting her head to look at her.

Then—soft, honest, matter-of-fact:

“You have no idea.”

Elphaba paused.

Glinda smiled.

And then she leaned in, kissing her again.

Elphaba’s hand slid up, fingers curling into Glinda’s hair, lingering longer this time.

The world outside their little bubble of warmth and quiet didn’t exist for a moment.

Then—another buzz from Elphaba’s phone.

She groaned, dropping her head against Glinda’s shoulder.

Glinda laughed, brushing her fingers through Elphaba’s hair.

“Come on, Elphie. It’s Sunday.”

Elphaba exhaled dramatically, still refusing to move.

Glinda grinned, tugging at her wrist. “Up.”

Elphaba sighed, sitting up at last.

She narrowed her eyes.

“You didn’t get sick.”

Glinda blinked, then smirked.

“Oh, I know. I have an excellent immune system.”

Elphaba stared at her.

Glinda beamed.

Then—another phone buzz.

Elphaba groaned again, flopping back onto the pillows.

Glinda just laughed, dragging her out of bed.

“Come on, you can’t avoid the world forever.”

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