Inconveniently Yours

Wicked (Movie 2024) Wicked - All Media Types Wicked - Schwartz/Holzman The Wicked Years Series - Gregory Maguire
F/F
F/M
M/M
Multi
G
Inconveniently Yours
Summary
Elphaba Thropp and Glinda Upland have been rivals since high school—Elphaba, the sharp-tongued, bookish outcast, and Glinda, the effortlessly popular queen of high society. Now, thanks to a cruel twist of fate, they’re stuck as roommates at the University of Shiz.Between passive-aggressive battles over their dorm, cutting insults, and lingering tension, their hatred is mutual… or so they tell themselves. But the more time they spend at war, the harder it is to ignore the heat beneath every argument. Everyone else sees it.Elphaba and Glinda? They’re still too busy pretending to hate each other to admit the truth.
All Chapters Forward

Well, do you?

The letters sat untouched between them.

Glinda twirled her pen. Elphaba hadn’t looked at her notes in ten minutes.

The conversation had been coming. Neither of them wanted to start it.

Glinda sighed first.

“Elphie.

Elphaba exhaled sharply.

“Don’t.”

Glinda tilted her head. “You’re thinking about it.”

Elphaba’s jaw tightened.

“Of course I am.”

Glinda set her pen down.

“And?”

Elphaba stared at the desk for a long moment.

Then, finally—

“I want to stay here for break.. but I need to see Shell.”

Glinda nodded, waiting.

Elphaba’s fingers drummed against the table.

“But going home means him.

She didn’t have to say it. Frex.

Glinda swallowed.

“And Nessarose.”

Elphaba let out a sharp, humorless laugh.

“Oh, yes. Our beloved reunion. The idea of being under the same roof again is almost comical.”

Glinda winced.

Because that wasn’t just dread—that was pain.

Glinda took a slow breath.

“I have to go home.”

Elphaba finally looked at her.

Her expression was unreadable.

Glinda laughed—but it wasn’t real.

“My mother would physically drag me if I didn’t.”

Elphaba tilted her head.

“And yet, you haven’t told them you’re coming.”

Glinda exhaled.

“No.”

A beat.

Then, softer—

“They’d want to know who I’ve been spending my time with.”

Elphaba watched her carefully.

Glinda forced a smile.

“I’d have to lie.”

Silence.

Then—

“Would you?”

Elphaba’s voice was quiet.

And Glinda hated how much it made her stomach twist.

Glinda picked up one of the letters.

Turned it over in her hands.

“I don’t know what’s worse,” she admitted.

Elphaba raised a brow.

“Lying to them?” Glinda continued.“Or telling them the truth?”

Elphaba’s fingers curled around her pen.

“I think I’d rather lie.”

Glinda looked up.

Elphaba’s gaze was steady. Certain.

Glinda swallowed. “I don’t want to.”

Elphaba exhaled.

“But you will.”

Glinda hesitated. “So will you.”

Elphaba’s grip tightened.

Neither of them moved.

Neither of them spoke.

Because this wasn’t just about the break.

It was about the line they were toeing.

The lives they were living.


The ones they would have to hide.

And they both knew it.


The suitcases were packed. The books stacked.

The room felt quieter than usual.

Glinda lay curled beside Elphaba, head resting against her shoulder, fingers idly tracing patterns on her wrist.

Elphaba wasn’t sure when they had stopped talking.

But now, as the weight of the next morning settled over them, the silence felt heavy.

Too heavy.

Glinda sighed.

Elphaba felt it more than she heard it.

Then—softly.

“Elphie.”

Elphaba hummed.

Glinda shifted slightly, lifting her head just enough to meet her eyes.

“…Are we really going to lie to them too?”

Elphaba exhaled.

Glinda’s fingers tightened around her wrist.

“I don’t want to,” she admitted. “Not to them.”

Elphaba studied her.

Glinda, who had spent years perfecting the art of playing pretend.

Glinda, who had mastered every smile, every well-placed laugh, every carefully-worded answer.

Glinda, who suddenly, finally, didn’t want to lie.

Elphaba turned her hand over, lacing their fingers together.

“…Neither do I.”

Glinda swallowed.

“So we tell them, knowing full well they might implode?”

Elphaba was quiet for a moment.

Then—finally.

“Yes, because if we’re going to spend the next few weeks lying to everyone else…

Her grip tightened slightly.

“I’d rather not have to lie to them.

Glinda exhaled slowly.

And Elphaba knew she understood.

Glinda shifted closer. “It was kinda fun while it lasted, though.”

Elphaba hummed.

Their legs tangled beneath the sheets.

The warmth between them felt like an anchor.

Glinda’s hand drifted over Elphaba’s ribs, slow and unhurried.

“…Tomorrow?” she asked softly.

Elphaba nodded.

Glinda’s fingers pressed lightly against her side, teasing, lingering.

Elphaba let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding.

Glinda smirked.

Then—boldly, mischievously—

“If we only have one night left before we go back to pretending…”

Her lips ghosted over Elphaba’s jaw.

“…Shouldn’t we make it count?”

Elphaba shivered.

Then—smirking—

However do you mean?

Glinda grinned.

The moment tilted.

Not sharp, not sudden—just a slow, inevitable unraveling.

Glinda had started it—a teasing brush of lips, a playful dare.

But now?

Now, they weren’t just playing.

Elphaba felt the difference immediately.

Glinda’s fingers, usually light, usually fleeting—lingered longer.

Her breath, warm against Elphaba’s jaw, came slower.

Her body, already close, pressed in just a little more, settling, sinking into her.

For once, Elphaba didn’t resist.

They were half-reclined against the pillows, tangled in the dim light of the dorm.

Glinda—half on top of her, legs draped over Elphaba’s thigh.

Elphaba—leaning back, her weight sinking into the mattress, letting Glinda press into her.

The sheets had been kicked down, forgotten.

The space between them barely existed anymore.

Glinda’s hands, restless and knowing, traced over the soft fabric of Elphaba’s sleep shirt, skimming the sharp lines of her collarbone, drifting lower.

Elphaba shivered—not from cold.

From this. From her.

From the way Glinda held her like she wasn’t afraid.

Like she wanted this just as much as Elphaba did.

Like she needed to commit every second of it to memory.

Glinda kissed her slowly.

Not rushed, not desperate—just deep. Purposeful.

Like she had time to take her apart.

Elphaba’s hands, uncertain at first, found their way under Glinda’s shirt, fingertips skimming the curve of her waist, the smooth warmth of her back.

Glinda sighed against her lips—a sound so quiet, so soft, that it nearly undid Elphaba entirely.

She pulled her closer, a slow, steady tug.

Glinda didn’t resist.

She moved with her, leaning in, melting into her touch.

Her thigh slotted between Elphaba’s, pressing just enough—

Elphaba’s breath hitched and her lips found the curve of Glinda's jaw, moving lower, her hands dancing along the waist band of Glinda's shorts.

Glinda ran a hand through dark hair, cupping the back of Elphaba's neck. "Elphie.."

Elphaba mumbled against Glinda's collar bone as she sat them both up slid Glinda's shorts down as far as possible in this position. "Tell me to stop," 

Glinda's lips found Elphaba's, not touching, just hovering. Their breath mingling. She smirked. "Do you want to fuck me, Elphaba?"

Elphaba smiled, a genuine smile against Glinda's lips and whispered. "What gave it away?"

Glinda giggled, "Mostly the moisture you're leaving on my knee.."

"Just for that," Elphaba turned and pushed Glinda down onto her back, depositing Glinda's shorts onto the floor. Elphaba's hand moved lower, where Glinda's own moisture was pooling. "Hmm, can't be any more than this"

Glinda gasped at the contact. "Elphaba." Low, a warning.

Elphaba beamed, then she leaned in until her lips were touching Glinda's ear and whispered. "Do you want me to fuck you, Glinda?" 

The only answer Glinda gave was a breathless nod, fingers curling into Elphaba’s hair as they lost themselves in each other.


Brunch was perfectly normal.

Until Glinda, completely unbothered, stated the obvious over mimosas.

“Oh, by the way, Elphie and I are sleeping together.”

Silence.

Then—

Crope, without looking up from his menu, casually flipping a page: “Yeah, no shit.”

Elphaba froze, her fork hovering halfway to her mouth before clattering onto her plate. “I—I beg your damn pardon?

Tibbett, sipping his mimosa like this was old news: “We’ve known since your first kiss. We literally saw it happen. We decided to see how long we could pretend to be oblivious.”

Boq, finally taking a sip of his coffee: “Honestly, we just thought you’d tell us sooner.”

Fiyero, setting his drink down with a smirk: “This reveal? A little underwhelming.

Glinda, blinking in delight: “Oh! So we weren’t sneaky at all?”

Elphaba, horrified: “What do you mean, you knew?

Crope, grinning: “Babe, you stick out like a sore thumb dipped in emerald paint. There was never any ‘blending in. You guys are so obvious it’s remarkable that you thought you were fooling anyone.”

Tibbett, pointing his fork at them: “We literally watched you two flirt in real-time. The pining was unbearable.

Boq, rolling his eyes: “The ‘study sessions’ that were definitely not studying? The way Glinda looks at you? We’ve been suffering in silence.”

Fiyero, stretching lazily: “Honestly, the only shocking part is that you thought you were getting away with it. You really thought no one noticed the under-the-table situation last night? The Truth or Dare?”

Elphaba, glaring: “I am sneaky.”

Tibbett, deadpan: “No, you’re not.

Crope, listing on his fingers: “The touching? Constant. The way you disappear together? Suspicious. The fact that you let Glinda touch you? Damning.”

Glinda, delighted: “Oh, Elphie, you let me touch you?”

Elphaba, visibly suffering: “I hate this.”

Crope, shaking his head, grinning: "You guys are so obvious it’s embarrassing. We could tell the second you walked in. The air around you is different—like, we can sense it. And trust me, after last night, there was nothing left to the imagination. Also, thin walls and news that travels fast? We know all about what you did last night."

Glinda, smiling sweetly: “Oh, well, we planned to pretend nothing was happening for as long as possible. Keep you all guessing forever.”

Fiyero, raising his glass: “To the worst-kept secret in Shiz.”

Boq, sighing, rubbing his temples: “I need another coffee.”

Elphaba, muttering under her breath: “I need to die.

Glinda, leaning into her, beaming: “Oh, Elphie. This is so much fun.”

Elphaba, groaning: “For you.

Glinda, pressing a kiss to her cheek: “For all of us.”

Crope and Tibbett, simultaneously: "You two have been making heart eyes at each other for so long, we were considering invoicing you for emotional damages."

Boq, setting his coffee down with a sigh: "Alright, before you two run off to do whatever it is you do now—"

Fiyero, smirking: "We know what they do now."

Boq, ignoring him: "—let's just acknowledge that this semester has been a lot. And as much as you two drive us insane, we do actually love you both."

Tibbett, mock-wiping a tear: "He's so brave for saying it."

Glinda, grinning: "Aw, Boq. That was almost sweet."

Elphaba, dryly: "Almost."

Crope, raising his glass: "To surviving the semester, to gossiping over the break, and to making sure you two never know peace when we return."

Elphaba, rolling her eyes: "Oh, good. Something to look forward to."

Glinda, squeezing her hand under the table: "See? It won’t be so bad."

Fiyero, smirking: "For us? No, it’s going to be hilarious."

They clinked glasses, laughter spilling between them, the kind that only came from a table full of people who knew each other too well, and who wouldn’t change it for anything.

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