We Meet Again
It turns out, choosing wallpaper and furniture was a hell of a lot more difficult than Harry would have thought. Hermione was smart and had a lot of talents but apparently decorating was not one of them. Ron was strangely more helpful, even thought his advices were simple, like ; "Choose a color theme, red would make Sirius mother scream, you should try that" or "You can't mix old and modern it will look strange and for Godric's sake don't mix Wizard and Muggle style, you don't want your house to look like mine." But to be honest if the choice was so complicated to make it was not because Harry did not know what he wanted, it was hard because Harry wanted to make everyone feel at home, and the Gryffondors color as principal palette scheme was a sure way to do the opposite.
No, Harry had to go in the greens -and to be honest it may be for the best, red eyes still haunt his dreams- maybe a light green will do the trick ? Make them feel at home, with their colors still imposing enough distance from the old dark wall of Twelve Grimmauld Place. The style of the house was the hardest part, Harry had spent most of his life in a Muggle one, but Narcissa, Draco and Andromeda had always lived in the Wizarding world. The first two would obviously like a classical pureblood decoration, they had great and live in the richest of these households, Andromeda on the other hand har marry a muggle born, they were living in the wizarding world but Ted had to bring some of the simpliness that muggles have. Perhaps she will prefer a more simple style, or maybe not...
He will see later on the day.
The three of them had decided to stay at that for today, they all had plans and Robert had dragged them around the shop for more time then they had intended to stay in the first place. He was expected at Andromeda's in less than thirty minutes, the perfect amount of time for him to fetch some gift for both Teddy and her, especially Teddy, after all he had to use his money in a way or another, and what better way then to spoil rotten his godson ? Really no one should expect that Harry was not ready to go bankrupt if it meant giving Teddy everything and anything he could need or want, at any point in life. If it were not for Hadrid he would have bought a caldron in solid gold the first day he had touched a galleon.
----
He was standing in front of the door, hands full with shopping bags. Harry had knocked on the door and was trying to calm his stress down before Andromeda opened the door. It was not the first time he came here but he did not really have time to take in the place. Even if he had, He knew some things had changed, they were too many memories for her to grief properly. He knew it, he still was not able to walk in Sirius's room without crying or having flashbacks. She had built this home with her husband and her daughter and now, she was living in it, alone with her grandson, trying to raise him in the same home she was grieving.
The door opening in a creak, wake him from is mind. The heavy wood leaving place to a brown hair woman, holding an infant ; the woman was tall and lean, almost too thin. Her hair was up, in an involuntary messy bun, her eyes were small and the skin under them was a light purple, signs of her tiredness. Her previously wrinkle-free face had aged. The dress she was wearing seemed a bit too large on her body. It was evident that she had lost weight and was not sleeping enough. The baby, on the other seemed healthy, he was wearing a wolf onesie and was holding onto his grandmother hair, -most likely the reason why the bun was messy in the first place-. His cheeks and small nose were pinkish, his eyes were still half close and his hair flashed from a light brown to black when the honey like orbs finally land on Harry.
- " Welcome Harry, please come inside, don't stay out here. " her voice however had not changed,still smooth and sweet. " How are you doing ? "
- " Thank you Andromeda. I'm good, happy to be out... How are things for you ? " his eyes were glued on the young child while talking. it had been so long since the last time he had seen him.
- " As good as you can get without a baby. Here hold him ! He misses you, you know, changing his hair to yours and crying, sometimes. "
- " I missed him too... so much " he was talking so quietly, feeling guilty " Erm... got some gifts ? for you and Teddy... "
Putting down the bags, Harry took hold of his godson, he was heavier than he looks, but that was good, proof that he was growing strong and healthy. Andromeda took the bags and started walking towards the living room, murmuring in her inexistant beard something about ; "spoiling her grandson rotten" and "keeping his money for himself".
----
Lunch had ended half an hour ago and Harry and Andromeda were enjoying a cup of tea in the living room, Teddy asleep in his room.
- " Do you, maybe, wish to ask me something ? " the smooth voice pulled Harry from his thoughts, once again he didn't know what to say.
- " Yes, I do actually. " he paused, taking in as much air as he could before opening his mouth again. Andromeda had put down her cup, looking at him, waiting for his demand but not pressuring him. "But I don't want you to think that I am trying to impose anything on you and I will absolutely understand if you refuse ! I uhm I started renovating Grimmauld Place, Sirius gave it to me and I intend to make it into a home where I could start things over and build a family under its roof."
- " That is a good thing, Sirius did the right thing when he bequeathed the house to you. But I don't see where it concerns me ? "
- " Well I had the hope that you and Teddy came live with me ? " he let a minute pass, then two and by the time the third had started he opened his mouth again, blurting out the words, his eyes closed and his cheeks red. " I'm sorry ! that was dumb of me,of course you wouldn't want to ever step a fooT in this hell hole again, Sirius hated it but he didn' have a choice. You have one and it was really idiotic of me to even think that you would want to leave the home you built with your husband and raise your daughter in. It seem obvious that you would want to raise Teddy here. Remus and Nymphadora would have wanted that too, they want Teddy to grow up in a safe and loving place. I am so sorry, I..."
- " Are you finished ? " his mouth closed so fast, his teeth thwack, opening his eyes again he could see a soft smile on her face. "It is true that I want Teddy to be raised in a safe, loving, healthy home, just like my daughter and her husband wanted. And yes I like to believe that Teddy would have that here but it has become clear to me that I may not be able to do it, now that they are not with us anymore. As much as I love my house, every single happy memorie is followed by a sad, hurtful one. " she made a pause here, visibly searching for the words. " I can't look at any pictures without feeling the tears come, I am still unable to step foot in my daughter's bedroom, simply looking at her door hurts. I don't sleep in my own bed and the most part of my nights are spent guarding Edward's cradle. I tried denying it for a long time now, but I clearly am not able to stay in this house and I am most certainly not able to raise him alone. " she took a second to look at him, guilt in her eyes. " I apologize for what I am about to say, you of all people should not have to hear that, I still see their bodies, when they bring them back to me, they look ... so white and bloody and stiff, at first I refused to believe that it was them, couldn't be. But it was and now it's just Edward and me. "
- " You don't have to Andromeda. You don't have to be alone, you shouldn't have to be so scared for him that you don't sleep anymore. You are not alone, I am here, I can help you , I will help you." he hesitated for half a second before standing up and sitting next to her, pausing a hand on her forearm. " You can talk to me about it, but you shouldn't keep it inside. It won't always be easy but we're going to do it, together. "
----
And like that they had cried, in silence, holding each other close, seeking comfort in the only person that could understand the pain of losing them. They dried their tears when Teddy awoke from his nap. They talk while giving him his afternoon snack, and Harry plays with him before leaving, going back to his soon to be home with a new found hope in the idea of welcoming two members of his family when the house will be ready.
This evening when Harry got up the stairs to go to sleep after eating dinner, he stopped in front of the door of Sirius, and for the first time since he fell through the veil, he opened the door and walked in the room. The room has like the rest of the house dark wood floor and the walls are a greenish dark gray, but unlike the rest of the house, they are covered by pictures, posters, records pockets and Gryffindor's merch. Clothes are thrown everywhere, not surprising when you know that Sirius would change two times a day and tries on at least three different outfits before deciding what to wear, each time. The bed is not, once again not surprising. What surprises Harry is the album open at the feet of the bed, sitting on it he takes it in his hands and re-open it from the start. The first part are pictures of Sirius and his brother when they were kids. Both of them are smiling, Sirius making funny faces while Regulus is laughing at his brother's antics, they look at each other with so much love ; the same one Harry could see in Sirius's eyes when he talked about him, in front of the family tapestry. The second part holds pictures of his friends, the Marauders, the face of Peter is scraped off on every single photo.
When Harry turns to the last page, his heart breaks, the tears come and his mind goes blank for a second before getting overwhelmed by flashbacks.
~~~
Harry's breath is chopped, his lungs burns but he can not stop, he has to move, has to be attentive, taking even txo seconds to slow down his breathing equals something bad, he is not sure what but he is sure that it will be bad. Sirius is next to him fighting his cousin, Bellatrix, Remus is behind them dueling another Death Eater. Seeing an opportunity, Harry cast a spell, and his lungs burns just a little more when he hears his godfather ;
" Nice one, James ! ".
But he does not have time to react, lightning flies past him and the spell hits Sirius, hard. Around him it feels like everything else stops, he focus on his godfather body, he watch the iris of his blue eyes retract fast and a rictus take place on his thin lips, he hears Bellatrix cackle and he see ,before understanding what it meant, Sirius stumble through the veil and his form starting to disappear. Harry throws himself after him, but strong arms hold him back, Remus smell surrounds him and his breathing resounds in his ear before his scream fills the room. There is no other noise outside his scream, or maybe he simply does not hear them. The next thing he knows Harry is running after Bellatrix, the crazy bitch who just killed one of two last parent figures he had.
And he does not feel any guilt or shame when he casts the unforgivable, he means it, he screams it ; "Crucio ! "
~~~
Harry is brought back in the real world by the feeling of wetness on his cheeks. He feels exhausted, and strangely he does not want to leave Sirius's room. Moving from a sitting to a lying position, he closes the album and holds it firmly against his torso. Calmly Harry let himself fall in the open arms of Morphee.
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