Hushed Wishes
The sky was low.
Grey clouds covered the cityscape in a dim atmosphere, the air fresh and humid. Calm, the streets were littered with puddles from the night's rainfall. It was barely cold enough to shiver.
James had never minded those days, whom others described full of grim and gloom. He liked to watch the veiled curtain of rain outside his window, liked to forget his umberella so he could apreciated the water droplets on his skin and in his hair. The aftermath of a storm left behind a tender kind of quite, and a smell that James liked to breath in deeply, getting high off it.
Rain washed off everything. Even blood, James thought grimly.
It was easier to forget how big the world was when the horizon was hidden behind fog. He found confort in that.
The pavement was uneven beneath his feet, leading him to Regulus' surprise. He didn't look where they were going, comptent to let himself follow the boy through the small streets. James had stopped talking a minute ago, and they were now in a restful silence. Not the kind James dreaded, and always forced himself to fill.
No, this silence wasn't empty. It was overflowing with stolen glances and shoulders brushing, with slight embarassment, faint exitement and the blush on Regulus' cheeks. That last one wasn't due to the cold, James knew, and he was proud to be the cause of such an adorable vue.
Smiling to himself, James noticed they were heading torward a puddle. Naturally, he pulled on their joined hands to rectify their course, avoiding rainwater. Only, Regulus' grip suddenly grew rigid, trembling slightly, and the boy's steps faltered. James looked to his boyfriend, to find him intently staring at his own hand in James'.
Lips parted, he blinked in astounishment, and James couldn't help finding adorable that the boy had been too distracted back at the store to realised they'd started holding hands. He rose a brow at Regulus in question, and thightened his grasp.
Regulus took in a sharp breath, still looking down.
James had to restrain a laugh when the Slytherin all but pretended to ignore the whole thing. Despite the blood rushing to his face, he held his head high and accelerated down the street.
Still, he took notice of James' grin and proceded to scowl at him, challenging him to make any comments. James wouldn't dare, and kept up with the rapid pace Regulus had instored.
"So... Are we almost there ?" He asked Regulus, reajusting his glasses.
"Yes." Regulus pulled out a pocket watch. All silver, the thing seemed old, but well taken care of. The representation of a constellation was carved on it, but James didn't get the time to figure out which one. Maybe Leo, from which Regulus' name was from ? When the boy flipped it open, James could see a crack in the glasse. The hands of the watch were wrouth iron, and an intricate gear was visible underneath. "We're on time."
Unaware that they had a schedule, he only nodded. His eyes didn't go back to the road, and instead stayed on Regulus' face. The very few freckles on his cheekbone caught his gaze, and he counted the beauty spots on his fair skin. Two next to his mouth, and one more right between his brow and the corner of his eyes. He frowned when he remembered Sirius had one in the exacte same spot.
He was about to make that remark, when Regulus came to a stop. He looked up at him, uncertainty in his grey eyes, as if awaiting his reaction.
James blinked and quickly took in his environment.
"The Tilting Theatre ?" He breathed out, surprised.
"We don't have to go if you don't want to..."
James rolled his eyes, "Don't be daft, Regulus. Of course I want to go, it's what you planned for us."
He hadn't spent much time in there, but James had seen a few plays over the years. Mostly, he just talked with Sirius at the back and annoyed his neighbours... But he was exited to do whatever Regulus had in mind. And now, he understood how the many snacks came in handy. He always grew hungry when sitting too long in the same spot.
"What are we watching ?"
Regulus pointed at the announce board, "Aladdin, a muggle folks tale. I think it originally takes place in Orient. This theater troupe does a lot of retelling, they have good critiques."
James, ignorant in this domain, could only smile exitedly.
"I haven't heard of it, but I don't know much neither about muggles nor theater, so I'm not surprised. It sounds fun though. I love that the room tilts and turn to follow the story better. Once, we tried standing up on the back of our seats, and competed to know who managed to stay up longer." He laughed, recalling one of their first outing as third years.
Regulus rose a brow at him, "If you do that now, I will deny ever knowing you."
James gave him a wide simle.
"Don't worry, I'll behave for you."
Regulus took back his hand in faux disguste, and James was just about to protest when he understood it was also to get a hold of their tickets. He pouted a second, but dutyfully kept his word ; he would be on his best behavior tonight. Hopefully, Regulus would then know that he and his brother weren't just troublemakers. He'd show Regulus that they could get along, and that not all of Sirius' friends were idiots.
Without another word, they headed in. After giving their tickets at the counter held by an old man wearing a much too large hat, Regulus gestured for James to follow him. The lighting was dim, glowing red in the narrow corridor.
Just before they reached the impressive double door opening on the stage room, Regulus made an abrute turn. He didn't even look at the entrance, and kept heading further.
"Uh, Regulus ? That's not the way in..." James advanced, following still.
The boy looked at him over his shoulder, the hint of a smirk showing.
"Is it not ?" He taunted.
Just then, they reached a small wooden door on their left. James frowned when Regulus just... Opened it and entered. He'd thought the hallways were narrow and dark, but the stairs Regulus climbed were so much worse. They were almost dismal. James kept up anyway.
"We're not allowed to be up here, are we ?"
Each step creaked under his weight.
"Does it matter ? I thought you a notorious rule-breaker, Potter."
James could only chuckle in admition.
Soon enough they had reached the top of the creepy stairway. Another door and then...
James mouth gaped open as he found himself on the balcony above the regular seatings. It was old and the public was banned from using it in favor of the stalls at ground level. The view from the Dress Circle was grande, he realised as he took a few steps forward.
Absentmindedly, James brushed his hand on the back of a seat, much larger than the others, and wrapped in washed off red velvet. He kept walking, enthralled, to the egde of the balcony, guarded by a simple barrier. Looking down from up here, the whole room seemed much bigger.
He glanced up at Regulus, who wore an apreciative smile. He seemed content with his reaction, arms crossed on his chest.
"The illegality is definitly outweighted by how awesome this is. Regulus, that's so cool, how did you even find out about this place ?" James asked in wonder.
Regulus came closer, "My need for quietude had me discovering a lot of private places like this one. I've always loved to come, but before I knew to hide away up here, the crowd used to get on my nerves. Especially," He gave James a pointed look, "if there happened to be boisterous gests getting rowdy."
James rolled his eyes with dramatic insistence, "Ugh. I know exactly the kind. I hate when those people show up, it just ruins the whole experience in my humble opinion."
Regulus snorted, and a grin slowly streched his lips. James smiled back at him, then leaned on his forearm propped up on the railing and looked back down.
"More seriously though, I can get real chatty during a play. You probably noticed I have a hard time shutting up. Sorry in advance."
Regulus shrugged, "Don't worry, I planned for your mouth to be otherwise occupied."
James' head snapped to him, eyebrows high on his forehead with incredulity. Since when was little Reggie this bold !?
But Regulus, with a deadpan expression, raised the bag of sweets from Honeyducks.
"Occupied with these, Potter."
James cleared his troat ackwardly, "Right. Of course."
He internally berated himself for jumping to conclusion when he spoted the twitch of Regulus lips.
"You thought I was feeding you out of the goodness of my heart ?" He teased.
James' jaw dropped, and he could only laugh at the sheer audacity.
"You are terrible, do you know that ? Now, I'll have to make sure I talk non-stop just so your devilish plan fails. Shutting me up will take you more efforts, let me tell you that !"
"Sure," He rolled his eyes. "Though I suspect the scenery makes up for how terribly devilish I am."
He turns on himself to gesture at they're surroundings, a little smug.
James hummed his agreement.
"I suppose it does. I wonder how many blokes you've taken here to woo, Regulus Black." He baited him, smirking.
He expected a scoff, hoped for a blush... But got neither.
Regulus was suddenly looking at him straight in the eyes, humorless. He leaned in, licking his bottom lip.
"I haven't taken anyone here but my friends. Nor have I ever tried to woo anyone, James Potter. None before you."
Heart speeding sligtly in his chest, James swallowed with difficulty.
"You... You've never had a boyfriend before ?"
"No." Regulus gave a small shake of his head. "Does that bother you ?"
"Not at all, I just... Find that hard to believe. I've never dated anyone before either."
Something seemed to passe in Regulus' eyes, but it was gone before James could figure out what it was.
"I know," He said. "I guess I should thank Evans for that. Your infatuation with her kept everyone at arms lenght but... I hate her too much for being the object of your affection to be grateful."
James blinked.
"You hate Lily ?" He blurted out.
Regulus scoffed, "Of course I hate her. As well as each and every person you've associated with at parties for more than a drink and a dance, if you know what I mean."
Well. That was intense. Regulus wasn't even embarassed at his admission. James was speechless, and wondered for how long exactly Regulus had liked him. He guessed he shouldn't be as surprised as he was by the boy's obvious possessivness ; Sirius was the same. He was jealous and protective of what and who he considered his, and it seemed it was a trait his brother shared.
"I think you'd get on quite well with her though. She's good at potions like you. And you don't have to worry about her, I'm infatuated with you now."
James felt victorious as that got him the blush he wanted. He also felt he had an opportunity to suggest him becoming closer with his friends- and hence with Sirius.
"But I guesse you'll get to know her at those parties you mentioned."
Regulus frowned and retched back.
"Come on now, you know you'll have to attend ! It's now your job to ward off each and every persone who'd want to drink and dance with me."
Regulus squinted his eyes at him, but he was saved the bother of replying by the lights going out.
They both turned torward the stage.
"It's gonna begin soon enough, we should sit." Regulus told him.
James was about to turn torward the actual seats when Regulus grabbed his sleeved and pulled gently on it as he got down. James crouched to follow, and watched, a little bemused, as Regulus put his legs on each side of a wooden bar, leaving them hanging in the air.
He would have never imagined Regulus doing that kind of thing, and he learned that it liked seing the boy this way a little too much. He mimicked his position, swinging his legs over the edge and grabbing a bar as he watched Regulus set their snacks on the floor between them. He pulled the bottle of Sundrop out of the bag, and searched inside it for a second.
He seemed to find what he was looking for, and handed James the box of Mooncakes.
James grinned wide as the Theater trembled, annoncing the begining of the play. Warm, yellow light came to shine on the stage, revealing a cloaked figure playing a slow melody on a flute. With each lazy notes, a puff of smoke escaped the instrument, and before long, the fog turned into a tangible mirage of a desert. More actors came onto the scene, and the story started.
Two Mooncakes and a SilkSlurpy later, James had his first question.
He'd tried, he really did ! He'd stayed focused and silent, but...
"Is that beetle suppose to be the key to the talking tiger cave, or to the lamp thingy ?" He wispered, leaning torward Regulus.
The brunet sighed, and leaned closer too, without looking at him, "It's the key to the cave. And the tiger isn't the cave, just it's guardian. Also, the Lamp doesn't require a key, from what we know."
James nodded, eyebrows furrowed. He oppened his mouth to speak, but closed it again... Only to ask anyway :
"I thought muggles didn't even know about Magic ?"
Let alone how to make advanced spells like those. The Tiger guarding the cave said only someone pure at heart could enter. That kind of ward with such restrictive condition could only be made by the best of the best ! And what did "pure at heart" even mean ? It was all very confusing.
"I told you ; this is folks tale. They don't actually believe it, it's just a story they make up to entertain themselves. And their invented magic doesn't work the way it actually does. I once read a book in which the magicians were sorted by elements, and they could only controle one of them." Regulus explained with patience.
James nodded, and wondered how many disturbance it would take to have Regulus snap at him. He made a bet with himself, aiming at the smallest number of interferences for the most pissed off expression.
So it continued to play out like this ; sharing comments, cakes and candies ; brushing shoulders and whispers in each others ears ; James asking questions...
- "Why does the bird talk but the monkey doesn't ?"
- "I should start dressing like that. The turban would suit me, don't you think ?"
- "Isn't that going a little fast ? Didn't they meet, like, an hour ago ?"
- "They're about to execute him because he stole something !? What the hell, Jasmin can't let that happen, why isn't she using her rank of princesse to save him ?"
- "Okay now this doesn't make any sense. Both a thief and a monkey are pure at heart ?"
- "I take back every critique until now. I want that magic carpet. What kind of charms do you think we could use to make one ? Moony has a nice rug in the dorm..."
- "Aladdin would be a Gryffindor for sure. Jasmin though... Ravenclaw maybe ?"
- "Excuse me ? Regulus tell me I'm misunderstanding here, she can't really be expected to marry that rotten, manipulative sod. He's twice her age for Godric's sake !"
- "You've Never Had A Friend Like Me is going to be stuck in my head till the end of time, and I make no complaints. I'm gonna make that song my entire personality."
- "Prince Ali Ababwa may sound cool, but he's not going to woo her with those chained animals. Her best friend is a tiger, think Aladdin, think !"
... And Regulus begrundgingly answering them :
- "It could be because it's a parot, these are known to repeat the words they hear. I'm glad the monkey can't speak though, the little shit is annoying enough as it is."
- "It would hide your stupid hair, that'd be an improvement."
- "I thought you'd be the sort to believe in love at first sight and the such."
- "Shut up Potter."
- "Just watch the bloody play !"
- "I'm not sure Lupin would appreciate the use of his carpet... But with a permanant levitating charm and an activable animus transfiguration, there might be a way."
- "With his kind of ambition, he'd be a Slytherin. But maybe you're right, he's too stupid for the House."
- "It's an arranged marriage, she's lucky he isn't related to her..."
- "As long as it stays in your head, I don't care. Just don't break into a solo in Hogwarts halls."
- "I suppose that wasn't his best move indeed."
James then forgot to count how many times Regulus scowled at him and agressively hushed him, because honestly, he was having too much fun to care. He got to see a more boyish side to Regulus, relaxed and even a little mischevous. On more than one occasion, he felt his heart flutter when his eyes met Regulus'.
As he looked at him, so peacful next to him, James could hardly believe that he'd kissed that boy. And that he was allowed to do so again. He couldn't help but stare : Regulus looked like an angel that had come to tempt him, simple mortal. His eyes were focused ahead, the simmering light from the stage reflecting in them. His hair fell in silky waves to the small of his neck, and he seemed so innocent and pure, it made James want to mess him up. Make him a willing victime of corruption.
He was enraptured by he's etheral beauty, in it's utter perfection.
So much so, he startled when the Theater shook harder. It followed the scene happening, but James hadn't been paying attention. Embarassed, he cleared his troat and trained his eyes on the play once again.
Right, Jafar was being a egoistical dick.
James forced himself to focus on the story. It was really good so far, the actors performing scenes and songs with talent, and the characters they played were relatable. He could root for the heroes and properly hate on the vilain.
"I really don't understand Jafar," James let out. "From what I gathered, he already is the second most powerful man in that country. He advise the Sultan and basically controles him, right ? But still, he hungers for more and ruins all that he had for the Genie's three wishes."
"That's human nature, isn't it ? Always wanting more and better. Once you've tasted power, you're starved for more. Wouldn't you be tempted by the Genie's power ? Three wishes to get everything you could ever want..."
James hummed, shrugging.
"Sure, I'd be curious but..."
Regulus turned to fully look at him, "Are you telling that if you had the occasion, you wouldn't wish for anything ? There's nothing in the world you would change about your life ? Nothing you want ?"
The younger boy was incredulous. James could see a certain urgency shining in his eyes, trying to figure out what James would want. He decided to play the game.
"Well, if I could wish for anything, I'd surely... I don't know, wish that world hunger disapeared ? Maybe that as soon as someone was hungry, food would appear for them to eat or something. That would solve most problemes for humanity, right ? And it'd be so cool too. You crave chocolate, boom ! Some just landed next to you."
He illustrated his words by popping a Chocoball in his mouth.
Regulus gaped at him.
"That's... Awfully rightous, and it's so like you I should have expected something like that." He chuckled, shaking his head. "Anything else ?"
At the same moment James thought no, he opened his mouth to respond :
"I'd wish for the Unforgivables to have never been invented."
Regulus tensed next to him. He brought his wide eyes to James, and they both stopped breathing for a second. James hadn't meant to say that, but he couldn't deny that it was true. Oh, how he'd wish no one had to suffer at the end of those curses.
Something passed between them, and they just knew they were thinking about the same person. About a brother they shared, by some painful twist of fate. James swallowed, and wondered if he'd just ruined what he had with Regulus.
But the boy kept looking at him, the play forgotten. In his eyes, James couldn't percieve any resentement, only... Gratitude. He looked surprised, and so shyly happy that someone would think of this. Think of two scared little boys, and wish that they were safe.
James wanted to cry, find a time-turner and go back to find them, hug them close, take them away. Take them somewhere nighmares were something you waked up from, not in.
He wanted Regulus to know that.
"What would you wish for ?" He asked instead, almost in a murmur.
Regulus' eyes traveled across his face reverently before answering, just as low.
"A few weeks back, I would have wished you would look at me the way you're looking at me now."
James' breath caught in his lungs, and he dived into the depths Regulus' eyes, eyes that were nor black or blue, but fog on a rainy day. The color of clouds of volcanic ashes, so grey they devoured and dulled any shade.
James leaned closer.
"And before that, I would have wished you wouldn't look at me at all. Your gaze on me felt like sunburn on my skin, and it burned until you looked at me again. I hated it."
He leaned in again. Too close.
James wanted to ask if he was still feeling that way.
James wanted to say he was the one burning now.
Instead, voice raw, he demanded : "What are you wishing now ?"
His tongue darted out to lick his lips, uncertain.
"I wish..." He breathed in, about to answer when he stopped himself.
James clearly saw the moment when Regulus broke the spell they were both under. He averted his eyes and cleared his troat.
"I wish you'd shut up and let me watch the goddamn play."
James blinked, pulled out brutally of the trans he was in. He took a shaky breath through his mouth, mustering up enough common sense not to snog the boy in front of him. Barely. He busied himself by opening the second box of Mallowmelts.
He let out a small chuckle.
"Alright, alright. It's a good thing there is no Genie to help you, you would miss my very insightlful remarks."
Regulus snorted, the tension finally gone, "Is that your third wish, Potter ?"
James glared playfuly and out of nowhere, shoved the pastrie in his mouth. Regulus eyes widdened in fright at the sudden force feeding, his vehement proteste reduced to a groan by the cake half in his mouth and James' hand against his lips.
Outraged by his sheer impudence, Regulus' whole face turned bright red, and he slapped James' hand away from him. The death glare he was the target of would be scary if not for his boyfriend's clear embarrassement and struggle to swallow. James couldn't hold in his laughter, and was mercylessly shoved away.
"What's wrong Sugar, I'm just feeding you out of the goodness of my heart ?" He poke fun at Regulus, offering the bottle of Sundrop.
After Regulus took a sip, he immediatly bit out :
"Firstly, don't ever call me Sugar again. Secondly ; fuck you, I could've choked !"
James only laughed some more, and licked the remanant frosting off the palme of his hand. Regulus made a noise of disguste, but James notice the way his eyes followed the mouvement of his tongue. He internally laughed and made a show out of it.
"What should I call you then ? Regulus," He licked his index and sucked on the tip, "is such a mouthful."
Regulus didn't seem more able to swallow than he was with the Mallowmelt in his mouth. He turned away and drank more Sundrop, flushed and bothered. James' stomach did a sommersault. He was trying very hard not to show his victorious amusment.
"With such a big mouth, I'm sure you can manage."
James laughed again. This was the most fun he'd had in a while. And definitly the best date he'd ever been on, even if there weren't that many to compare with.
"Hey, can I have some of that ?" He asked, extanding a hand torward the bottle.
Regulus obliged and gave it to him, but frowned.
"You're gonna drink straigh from it ? Isn't that... Doesn't that indirectly count as kissing ?" He stumbled over his word, like he hadn't meant to speak them aloud.
James took a look at his flushed cheek, his parted lips and his expectant gaze... He thought he'd much rather it be direct, and taste Regulus rather than the drink.
"I don't know," he said, his voice rough but his tone tender. "When I look at you, does it count as stargazing ?"
It was corny and cringy and everything that would aggravate Regulus, yet the starry eyed boy softened, looking over him with foundness. This time, he knew Regulus wouldn't turn away or back out. He let James cradle his cheek, and leaned into the touch with a sigh. James smiled, brushing a thumb over the brunet's lips, tracing their thin, but well drawn shape.
But before James could learn those curves with his own mouth, the Theater tilted forward abrubtly.
No sooner had James thought "for fuck's sake-" the floor ondulated, sending them both against the barrier. And, as James had completly forgotten he still held it, the bottle of Sundrop slipped out of his grip. Heart quickening instantly, he scrambled to get a hold of it, darting his hand through the bars to try and reach it.
Miraculously, he did. But no relief was felt, as he'd just caught it upside down. The golden liquide flowed out and...
"Shit !" Regulus cursed.
The same exclamation was heard below, as a man recieved half a bottle of mapple Sundrop on his head. James slapped a hand on his mouth, looking down at that poor dude-
James let out a yelp as Regulus pulled hard on his shoulder. The boy had had better reflexes and immediatly lied flat on his back and brouth his legs up, bent at the knee. James hurried to do the same to avoid being spotted, even hitting his head on the floor at how fast he fell back.
For a seconde, he could only hear the thundering of his heart and the cursing of the man dowstairs. They both kinda stared at the ceiling for a moment. Then, James turned his head to look at Regulus, only to find him already watching.
The moment their eyes met, he giggled. And they dissolved into a fit of laughter.
At first, they only shook silently, but at some point, Regulus really just... Lost it. He completly let go and laughed his heart out, lying down on the floor, all his body trembling. James, equally gone, still made a big discovery : Regulus had dimples when he laughed. And small rinkles at the corner of his eyes.
James lost his breath and any conception of time, looking at his boyfriend next to him. They were being silly, and stupid. It felt so good James never wanted to stop laughing. Laughing to the point his stomach hurted, where he was having trouble catching his breath. He didn't even know what set him off, the whole situation, or the sound of Regulus' infectuous giggles. He was clutching his abs with both arm, folded in half, tears lining his grey eyes.
Yet at some point, instead of relapsing when their eyes met... They just, didn't look away. They started breathing in sync.
Then, James was on his side, propped up on an ellbow. His free hand reached out and brushed back a loose strand of hair. His hand landed on the floor on the other side of Regulus, and he was leaning down, down, down...
"Can I ?" He spoke against his boyfriend's awaiting lips, echoing his own words.
Regulus whispered an urgent "Yeah", and James - him - didn't need to be told twice.
He nothing but melted upon him, and the room fell away. He set his lips against Regulus', shifting to each corner of his mouth until he found the center, focussing on breaking his lips apart. It was lazy and slow, like savoring a hot beverage knowing you can have some more as soon as you finish. Leisurely kissing as if the time stopped passing by, as if they could do so for hours, and none of them was rushed to end it.
Regulus snaked his arms around his neck and hugged him closer, until there was nowhere for his tongue to be expect into his mouth. Warmth wrapped them in a haze, and James' mind went on overdrive... He couldn't think clearly, couldn't focuse on anything other than Regulus' silky touch and the way his lips opened and softly closed on his own. Again and again, so delightful James moaned helplessly.
Regulus stilled for a second at that, before pressing his lips to his one last time and pulling back.
James had never seen such a madening vue.
Regulus eyes were glassy and unfocused, his cheeks were flushed crimson and lord... His lips were red and wet and panting. A trickle of saliva still connected their mouth, and James wiped both their chins with his sleeve, himself a little breathless. Regulus was a mess underneath him, and James didn't want anyone to ever see him like that. Merlin knew people would faint at the sight ; James himself was lightheaded.
Regulus eyes fluttered shut for an instant, before streching his neck to reach up to him again, opening his mouth against his as an invitation.
James wanted nothing more than to start snogging the boy again, but keeping this slow pace would be a probleme. He could already feel heat pool at the bottom of his stomach, and that would make leaving the theatre just a bit complicated.
Still, he induldged Regulus with a hard tug on his lower lip, before sitting up and pulling the disoriented boy up with him.
"What..." He began, conciousness visibly slipping back into his eyes.
James chuckled, amused and really turned on by his effect on the boy.
"You are so fucking cute," He breathed.
Regulus, still hanging from his neck, burried his face in James' shoulder before the oldest could see him blush. After what they'd just done, it shouldn't have felt as intimate as it did. James wrapped an arm around Regulus' shoulder.
"Don't you want to see the end of the play ?"
He was answered by a groan, and a barely audible "shut up". James smiled and quitetly repositioned himself more confortably.
When he looked back ahead, Aladdin was freeing the Genie with his third wish.
It reminded James he still had one left...
I wish this whole thing works out. Let Sirius and Regulus be happy... And let me be a part of it. I don't want this to end.