Y/N
“This has to end, Y/N. You need to stop trusting Sebastian. The cost is much too high,” Professor Eleazar Fig implored you.
Hogwarts is not a safe place to keep secrets. You know that from the moment you started sharing yours with the young Sallow. You know that he is just using you in the hopes that your ancient magic would help him cure Anne.
His every word and every action betrayed his true intent, but you’ve been too far gone from the moment he shielded you from Madam Scribner’s wrath. You know that even that action was calculated, planned to perfection by the whip-smart Slytherin. You close your eyes from the truth, smiling serenely at the thought that someone cared for you.
Nothing was genuine, nothing was true. Still, you took the path that all your friends, the true ones – Natty, Poppy, Garreth – and even his very own best friend – the infamous Ominis Gaunt – warned you about.
You willingly chose to play the fool, pretended that his sweet smiles are only for you, pretended that he did not mean the hurtful words that he constantly throws at you when you do not give in to his wishes, pretended that a piece of his heart – no matter how small – is yours to keep.
The smile that did not reach your eyes said it all to Professor Fig. You have made your choice, and you will stand by it. Your mentor, the only father figure you have in this lifetime, let out a deep sigh. “So be it,” his voice betrayed the disappointment and sadness he felt.
You excused yourself to run toward your next class only for you to hear Leander mention your name.
“Samantha Dale? I thought you are going out with Y/N?” You know what the beautiful, freckled boy’s response would be, down to the last word. You ought to walk away, this is not hidden knowledge at least for you. But you stood there frozen, Merlin only knows why.
“Y/N?” Sebastian scoffed. “Why would I want someone who always reeks of blood and dirt? And have you seen her scars? I’m only using her to help Anne.”
See? You smiled to yourself. You KNEW. You alone could read him like a favorite book. You stepped out from the pillar and walked toward the boys, but your face is a picture of serenity. The other boys, Leander, Everett and Duncan, are unable to look at you. How cute.
“There you are!” Sebastian turned to you with a wide smile. You did not miss how his face transformed from the sneer that showed his utter disgust at the thought of you and him together. But who cares about that when you’re now getting your happy Sebastian?
“Professor Fig let me borrow this book. He said it’s a treasure trove of information on curses.” Like clockwork, you once again handed him something that he’s not supposed to have, and you know it is too late for you to stop.
Everyone at the table looked at Sebastian with dread when he eagerly reached for the book, but only you felt how he took a second or two longer to grab it from you. Hidden from everyone’s view, his pinky stroked yours for a heartbeat, and you know if he asks for the stars, you will find a way to pluck them.
Sebastian
She’s gone.
The professors said it was a freak accident, shared how you got lost and disappeared in the dungeons, out of any magic’s reach. But Sebastian knows the truth.
He does not need the professors to confirm that you did not make it out of that battle alive. He knows the exact moment you left this world. Your painful, final scream traversed through the space where dreams are made and forcefully dragged him to consciousness. The burning pain and subsequent disappearance of the forbidden mark you both agreed to imprint on each other told him everything he has to know.
He does not really care. You were a means to an end. You agreed to help Anne, and you did. That’s what mattered. Sebastian glanced at his shaking hands and grimaced. It must be the after-effect of the mark that vanished.
He reached out to grab a potion from his bedside cabinet when he saw your house tie, the one he forcefully borrowed from you. He told you he needed it so that he could invite Samantha to the Slytherin party a long, long time ago. No one knows that Samantha has never gotten anywhere near that tie.
Sebastian grabbed the tie to throw it away but his stupid shaking hand refused to follow his command. Let go, let go, let go, but his fist remained closed, refusing to release the tie that still smells of blood, dirt and black roses. No one, especially you, has to know why and how he had memorized your smell.
You were a means to an end. It didn’t matter to him that your brightest smile could dim even the strongest Patronus. It didn’t matter to him that every little touch and glance from you could make his entire day. It didn’t matter to him that your voice was the only thing that kept him from drowning in darkness most days.
Those were only added benefits. They will not be missed. You too will not… but before Sebastian could finish the thought, the memory of your first and last hug after a summer apart rose unbidden, how he drank your scent like a man that’s been wandering in a desert for far too long, how his world was at its most peaceful that very moment when your frame fit perfectly against his and he secretly whispered on top of your head, “I missed you, I missed you, I missed you… I love you.”