“You don’t have to come, if you’d prefer.”
“No, it’d feel weird if I didn’t. Besides, I liked Aunt Dorea, she always managed to annoy mum.”
James laughed, “I think she annoyed most people.”
Sirius smiled. He was nervous if he was honest with himself. It had been a year since he’d ran to the Potters who welcomed him immediately with no questions asked. How his family would react to seeing him at the funeral, he had no idea. Their disgraced heir, their shame.
“Boys, are you ready?” Effie’s voice echoed up the stairs.
“Coming, mum!” James shouted back down. He turned to look at Sirius, “well we’d better get going.”
They walked down the stairs together to the fireplace.
“Oh, James! I wish you would just use some Sleek-Ezy on that hair,” Effie licked her hand and attempted to flatten her son’s purposefully untameable hair.
“Mum! I’m nearly seventeen!”
“But you’ll always be my baby.”
Sirius snorted.
“Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you, Sirius!” Effie pinched his cheek. The warmth that Effie exuded still shocked him sometimes. It had never occurred to him before that mothers weren’t meant to flip from an all-consuming love to icy disregard.
“How are you feeling about everything, darling?”
“I’ll be fine. They’ll probably avoid looking at me anyway,” Sirius scoffed.
Effie furrowed her brow for a moment.
“Hmm, well we’d best be going. Monty’s already there to help with everything.”
Effie grabbed some Floo-powder, “Wickmore House!” and vanished in the green flames. Both boys followed suit.
***
The drawing room of Wickmore House was stately with light green walls and golden cornices. It was filled with witches and wizards all dressed in black. Dorea had been something of a society lady, quite different to Sirius’ own mother who preferred her own company. Sirius remembered on the few occasions that they ever visited Dorea and Charlus, Dorea would call his mother “Birdie” and constantly mention how lucky it was she had grown into her ugly beady eyes and beaky nose. His mother’s look of humiliation amongst all those people enraged him and Sirius’s magic had lit Dorea’s dress on fire. His mother had smiled at him then.
“Come on mate, we’d better say hi to Uncle Charlus.”
James and Sirius made their way to their uncle, a small, faded man with the Potter knobbly knees.
“Sorry for your loss Uncle Charlus,” James began shaking his hand.
“Yeah sorry about Aunt Dorea, uncle”
***
Regulus adjusted his robes in the mirror. He found it difficult sometimes to spend too long looking at himself, he’d only ever see a pale imitation of the brother he was meant to forget. His mother had warned him in very clear terms that he was not to speak to Sirius, not even look at him. Regulus, of course, knew his duty and told her he didn’t want to associate with blood traitors. The glimmer of pride in her eyes had been worth the lie. Of course, he wouldn’t dare speak to Sirius, but he half-hoped that Sirius would speak to him.
“Oh Reggie, darling. You look so grown up.”
Narcissa’s black-gloved hand touched his shoulder, her blue eyes meeting his in the mirror.
“Thank you, Cissy. How have you been?”
“Oh, I’ve been absolutely devastated. You know how I loved dear Aunt Dorea.”
Regulus knew for a fact that his cousin had never been fond of their great-aunt. When they were younger before the façade of prim and proper Narcissa had been set, Cissy would entertain them with impressions of their relatives. Her best being Dorea. But Blacks mourned their own dead, despite their relationships during life.
“Yes, she was dearly loved by us all.”
“Why don’t you walk with me around the grounds, Regulus. It’s been an age since we’ve talked properly, and we still have some time before the funeral begins.”
Regulus put his arm around hers and they made their way out through the grand oak doors. It was a picturesque winter’s day. Snow had fallen the night before and blanketed the grounds.
“I hear that you’re doing well at school, are you nervous for your O.W.Ls?”
“Not too nervous, I’m sure that I’ll be fine.”
“Have you thought of what you want to do after school?”
“I’m going to fight for the Dark Lord.”
Narcissa sighed, “I thought as much. Lucius had mentioned that they had offered you a place.”
“I’m to be marked in April.”
Narcissa stopped, clearly this was news to her.
“Regulus,” she whispered, voice heavy. “You cannot take the Mark while still in school. You’re too young. The Dark Lord won’t mind waiting until you’ve finished. Please, Reg.”
Regulus felt the blood rush to his face. He was not a child. If Sirius hadn’t deserted them, there would have been no question if he was ready at sixteen to take the Mark. He pulled his arm away.
“I think that the Dark Lord knows that I am ready, Narcissa. I think we had ought to take our seats.”
Narcissa bit her lip, white teeth marring her bright red lipstick.
“If you’re sure, Reg. But please think about it.”
The two wandered into the courtyard where the service was to be held. Regulus breathed in sharply. Even from the back, he could not mistake his own brother. Sitting next to that usurper Potter boy. Narcissa clutched his arm tighter and leaned into whisper.
“I know that it’s hard, Reg, but he is not your brother any longer, nor my cousin. Your real family is more important, the family that didn’t abandon us.”
Cissy kissed him on the cheek and gave him a brief smile before joining Lucius near the middle. Reg went to the empty seat at his mother’s side. Her eyes were glistening, and she too was looking at the back of Sirius’ head. A pang of pity stabbed at Regulus’ heart. He had lost a brother, but she had lost a son. He grasped her hand in his and her gaze turned to him.
“He has no shame, Regulus. How could he do this to me? Even after he broke my heart he tries to do so again. Anything to embarrass his poor mother.”
Regulus released her hand. Ah. It was only sadness for herself as per usual. The funeral began as the harpist played a sombre melody. Ralston and Charlus levitated Dorea’s shrouded body down the aisle. The shroud was grey linen, emblazoned with the large black dog of their family and the hooded skeleton of the Potters. The Potter crest had always struck Regulus as quite macabre for a family that disavowed the Dark Arts so heavily. He suspected that they mustn’t have always been so good as they claimed to be.
The service went for an hour, the usual speeches being made before Dorea’s body was lit afire the ashes charmed to enter a grey urn where she would rest for eternity. Regulus took his mother in arm and guided her to the parlour where the reception was set up. She had played the part of grieving niece well, wailing and sobbing throughout the service. It was hard to know where the act ended and began for all facets of her life. Regulus thought that was his one similarity with his mother, there were too many versions of themselves. Regulus, the blood purist. Regulus, the boy who cried when his soft toy was destroyed. Regulus, the brother. Regulus, the heir no longer a spare.
***
The presence of his family had proved all too much for Sirius, and so he decided to take full advantage of the open bar. Only his uncle Alphard had spared him a smile although he hadn’t dared go up to speak to him. The rest had all pointedly ignored him, not that he cared really. Idiot blood supremacists the lot of them. James was off talking to his cousin Ralston, apparently, he and his American friend Ezekiel had been taking a tour of South America. Sirius thought it might be fun to do with Moony after school, after the war. And with James and Peter of course, Sirius reminded himself. Sirius looked at the remnants of the amber liquid in his glass, time for another one. Sirius walked to the bar only slightly swaying.
“Another Ogden’s please.”
“Don’t you think you’ve had enough?” a familiar voice asked.
Regulus.
“There’s no such thing as enough, little brother.”
Sirius’ eyes drifted down to his brother’s left forearm.
“There’s nothing there,” Regulus said, his voice barely a whisper. “At least not yet.”
Fire filled Sirius’ blood before running cold. He knew his brother believed in all that shit, but he couldn’t be stupid enough to actually want to be Marked.
“You’re only fifteen, why would You-Know-Who want you?”
“Sixteen,” Regulus murmured.
“What?”
“It was my birthday four days ago.”
Regulus turned away from the bar and began to walk quickly out towards the grounds. Sirius grabbed his drink and walked out after him, clutching Regulus’ wrist.
“I’m sorry, Reg,” Sirius was lost for words, he’d never forgotten his brother’s birthday.
“I guess you really did abandon us, abandon me.”
“I didn’t abandon you, Reg! I had to leave. I couldn’t continue to be so… so suffocated there! You could leave too, come back to the Potters with me. Please.”
“To those blood-traitors?” Regulus sneered “I’d rather die.”
“You will die if you join up with them, mark my words!”
“As if your word means anything, Sirius! Do you remember what you said to me when you left for Hogwarts when you were eleven?”
Sirius looked back in his alcohol-fuddled mind, there had been something.
“No? Let me enlighten you because I certainly remember that lie you told. ‘Nothing will change, Reggie. I’ll write to you, and we’ll hang out all the time when you come next year.’”
“I… I, I didn’t change Reggie, you did!”
Regulus scoffed, “I remained the same! I was the constant, although you were the favourite! Even now you’re still the favourite. Cissy told me I shouldn’t join them either, if it had been you, they would take you in immediately. Not stupid, weak, Reggie.”
“Cissy told you not to? Reggie, you’re not weak.”
“But I’m stupid?”
“If you willingly join them, yes, you’re stupid! You have a death wish!”
“Are you bothering my cousin, Sirius?” a familiar voice rang out across the snow.
“This doesn’t concern you, Bellatrix,” Sirius growled as she strode towards them.
“Oh, I think it does. I don’t want blood-traitors like you corrupting, poor little Reggie’s mind. We all know he can’t handle it.”
Regulus winced.
“Fuck you, Bella!” Sirius spat.
Bellatrix’s face darkened as she wiped Sirius’ well aimed spit from her eye.
“How about a duel, Sirius? We used to have so much fun with them.”
“Fine, I’d be more than happy to beat you again.”
Sirius began to walk toward Bellatrix, a duel had proper rules to be followed.
“Sirius, Bellatrix stop! This is ridiculous.”
“Get out of this Regulus,” Sirius grumbled.
“Just because you could never win against us,” retorted Bellatrix.
Regulus turned into the manor, most likely to get someone. Maybe he was weak, Sirius thought bitterly. Bellatrix bowed dramatically, red sparks emanating from her wand as she did so.
“You ready, little cousin?”
“Ready, big cousin.”
A jet of light very nearly hit Sirius immediately before his shield charm was in place.
“Getting sloppy, are we?” Bellatrix jeered.
“Tarantallegra!” Bellatrix’s legs began a hearty jig. Sirius quickly charmed the snow around her to form into four angry snowmen ready to charge.
“Incendio,” Bellatrix screamed causing his snowmen to melt just as they had begun to scratch her. The steaming water around cascaded into a ball that pummelled Sirius. Gasping for breath he cast the Impediment Jinx slowing his cousin down just enough so that he could catch his breath.
“Bombarda,” the ground in front of Sirius exploded throwing snow and earth everywhere. Bellatrix did have a flare for explosions. Sirius’ Shield Charm caught the worst of it as he sent a Tickling Charm her way. Childish but effective. Sirius tried to think of her worst fear, what was every pure-blooded witch’s worst fear? He conjured a stake, the near immediate Incarcerous after tied her onto it quickly. Bellatrix’s eyes widened as she struggled against the bonds.
“Incendio!” the fire began at the hem of her robes as she screamed. A crowd had formed around them, he hadn’t noticed. Drawn by Bellatrix’s screams before an all too familiar voice rang out.
“ENOUGH!” his mother rushed between them undoing the spells on Bellatrix quickly before turning to face her eldest son. “YOU BLOOD-TRAITOR, IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT FOR ALL OF WIZARDKIND? SHAME OF MY FLESH, ROT OF MY WOMB. I LOVED YOU AND YOU TREAT ME THIS WAY, YOUR FAMILY THIS WAY?”
Sirius rolled his eyes, of course, Bellatrix was just burning but she made it about her in some way.
“Why act like you can love, mother,” he sneered. “You yourself said I wasn’t part of this family anymore.”
Walburga wailed, “You made me! I gave you everything. At least I have Regulus,” she turned to her younger son who was standing at the front of the crowd around them. “Regulus, I need you. Take me home away from this traitor.”
Regulus went over to his mother, her face buried into his shoulder as she loudly sobbed.
Sirius looked at the crowd, their faces a mix of shock and fear. They were people he had grown up with, family, their friends. It all seemed so ridiculous.
Sirius laughed.