lovely
James let out a sigh.
“Are you okay?” Hermione asked before James could even start to talk. Hermione’s worry made James smile.
Oh, she is lovely.
“No.” James answered truthfully. He knew he would not be able to lie to Hermione about this. About anything really.
Hermione frowned. “Do you want to talk about it?”. She leaned forward to be closer to James in case he didn’t want to talk about it loudly.
James looked at Hermione’s warm brown eyes that were now filled with concern.
Oh yes. She is lovely.
James wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol that made him finally realize he had feelings for Hermione, or the fact that it had already been many years when he realized it was not Lily whose company he seeked.
Oh, James was fucked. How could he fall for his bestfriends sister? But who could blame him. It was Hermione. The most caring and kind person there was. How could he not fall for her?
James woke up from his thoughts when Hermione laid a hand on his knee. James stared at Hermione while the tears started to gather in his eyes. Hermione quickly got up from her chair and before she had time to hug James he had already wrapped his hand around her waist and buried his head into her stomach. His shoulders started to shake as he sobbed.
Hermione put one of her hands on his head and the other on his back, running her hand up and down in a comforting way.
They stayed like that for a long while until James stopped crying. He let go of Hermione. She took a step back and sat back down to the chair. She grabbed James' hands in hers.
“James. Please tell me what’s wrong.” James could see the tears glistering in her eyes. Had she cried too. Because he cried?
James cleared his throat. It felt dry after all the crying.
“Do you want me to get you something to drink?” Hermione asked. James shook his head. He didn’t want her to leave now.
“It’s my m-.” James' voice broke and he had to clear his throat again. “It’s my mum. She uhm. She has cancer.” And before he knew he was back to crying. And Hermione wrapped her hands around his shoulders. James pulled her to sit into his lap so he could bury his face in her neck and cry again. Hermione didn’t say anything, she stayed there running circles on his back while he calmed down.
James didn’t move away when he started talking again. “We found out yesterday. It’s not bad, but still she has to go through surgery and chemo and I’m so so scared that she won’t survive it.”
“She will.” Something in Hermione’s voice made him believe what she said. “She is the strongest woman I know, she will be okay. She has you and Monty and me and everyone else. She has so many people who love her and will do anything to help her.”
“She doesn’t want people to know. You can’t tell anyone.”
“Okay I won’t. But I will be here for her and you and Monty. Whatever you need.”
“You don’t have to. I just needed to tell someone.”
“No. I will. She has done so much for me and Remus more than you will ever know. I will come over to your place tomorrow.” James could hear in her tone that there was no fighting her in this.
“Thank you.” James whispered into her neck.
Hermione let James hold her for a moment longer before James let go. Hermione stood up from his lap. Both of them only now realizing what kind of position they had been in. James could see the faint blush on Hermione’s cheeks.
“I’ll get us something to drink and eat.” Hermione said, looking at the door. James nodded even though he knew she didn’t see it. She left the balcony
James used the time trying to gather himself. He hadn’t cried about this yet and he really had needed the cry. He did feel bad for telling Hermione when her mum had asked her not to tell anyone but he knew he could trust Hermione with this. She would not tell anyone about this. and to be honest he had needed someone who he could talk to about this.
Hermione came back with two cans of soda and a plate full of pizza. James smiled at her. She sat down opposite of him and sat the sodas and plate on the small table next to them.
As they ate they fell into comfortable silence. Both were in their own heads.