Distractions
At the touch of Sebastian’s lips against hers, Ash froze. The screaming in her mind abruptly halted, as his mouth slowly moved against hers. It felt as if a bucket of ice water was dumped over her and the magic slowed from a raging wildfire to slumbering embers.
Her eyes were still open, her body rigidly tense. Sebastian was kissing her. Sebastian was kissing her, and she wasn’t kissing him back—
Her eyes shut and her lips began to move against his. Her hands unclenched from the fists at her side and she wrapped them around his shoulders. The moment she began kissing him back, Sebastian’s restraint snapped.
His slow and tentative kiss became hungry, his fingers tightened in her hair, and as his tongue swept across her bottom lip— she moaned.
He practically inhaled her little noise of pleasure as he backed her up against the wall, pressing her against it. She ran her fingers into his hair, and yanked him impossibly closer. Every movement between them was frantic and harsh, and Ash couldn’t get enough.
His tongue swept across her bottom lip again and she parted her lips. Ash swallowed the groan that left his mouth as they deepened the kiss.
It was as if every part of her body had been electrocuted, every touch of his fingers across her jaw, every slight tug of her hair. She could lose herself in him, for once she could allow herself to be selfish. Warmth began to build in her abdomen, so different from the hellfire that surged through her only moments ago.
The hand cupping her cheek swept down to her shoulder, across her back and gripped her waist. She wished he’d leave bruises so that tomorrow she’d know this wasn’t a dream. A ragged gasp left her mouth as he squeezed her closer and it was as if he was oxygen and she had been starved of breath her entire life.
Her fingers tightened their grip in his hair and she arched her body against his, needing more— more of everything. Firewhiskey had always been a good distraction, Garreth less so, but this?
Sebastian tugged her hair, pulling her head back and his lips left hers only to find purchase on her neck.
The sound that left her mouth was something between a gasp and a moan, and was filled with pure desire. His soft lips pressed down again on the junction between her neck and jaw and she moaned again. She didn’t care about the embarrassing noises leaving her mouth, and Sebastian seemed to enjoy pulling them from her. He tightened his grip on her hip and groaned against her neck, trailing downwards with his mouth—
The screech of the Undercroft gate echoed across the room and Ash and Sebastian froze. His lips left her neck as he turned his attention to the entrance. Ash tried to catch her breath as Sebastian nonchalantly pulled away from her and slipped his hands into his pockets as Ominis stalked into the room.
Ominis sharp footsteps suddenly stopped and his head snapped in their direction. His hand tightened around his wand as he stared just above their heads.
“Sebastian where in Merlin’s name have you been—“
“Hello to you too, Ominis.”
Ash tried to slow her breathing as she stared at Sebastian. He didn’t look once over at her, as if his lips hadn’t been tracing across her skin moments ago. Ash slowly and quietly slid across the wall towards the entrance, Ominis’ attention was focused on Sebastian so she should just go—
“Ash quit slinking around, I can hear you breathing.”
She froze in place and threw an exasperated look at Ominis, “How do you do that?”
He didn’t answer her and instead stepped closer to Sebastian, “You promised that you would keep me informed of your activities.” There was practically a snarl in Ominis’ words and Sebastian shrugged despite the fact that Ominis couldn’t see the gesture.
“I left a note.”
“The note didn’t say you would be gone all night!” Ominis snapped.
Sebastian sighed and ran a hand through his hair, “Ominis—“
“No. Don’t try to use that tone, don’t try to placate me.” He hissed and stepped closer to Sebastian, “I am not going through this again, I am not repeating fifth year—“
“It wasn’t Sebastian’s fault.” Ash cut Ominis off, and he whirled to face her instead. She irgnored the irritation on Sebastian’s face for her intrusion on their argument.
Ominis’ pale eyes stared just over her shoulder as he snapped, “I’m well aware that if Sebastian is in trouble these days it’s because of you.”
The words were like a slap in the face, and she clenched her jaw as she stared at the stones beneath her. Only days ago Ominis had rubbed her back as she had an episode, and she thought…
She shut that thought down. No, things had not changed.
Sebastian’s voice echoed across the room, “Ominis I swear to Merlin if you blame Ash for my actions one more time—” He cut himself off and clenched his jaw, and Ash tore her gaze back to the floor. She didn’t want to see them come to blows, not over this— not over her and not now when her lips were swollen and the ghost of Sebastian’s touch still lingered on her skin.
“You’ll what? Hex me? A well placed Crucio perhaps? The last time you used it was on our dear friend Ash so maybe it’s time to cross off another name—“
“Shut the fuck up Ominis.”
It was her snarling words that cut him off. She snapped her gaze from the floor to see the shock written across Ominis’ face. It didn’t stop her, and she didn’t dare look at Sebastian as she continued, “You’d have rather died that night in the Scriptorium than use a simple spell. You would rather sit in this castle and throw about your family name than get your hands dirty trying to do anything that actuallymatters.” She took a breath, the rage she had locked away at the end of fifth year trying to slip through her cracks, “We went looking for clues on Harlow at the last poacher camp. That’s it. We didn’t return in case we were being watched by Ashwinders. That’s. It.” Another breath through her nose as she tried to push down on that unforgiving anger, “Don’t you dare shame Sebastian for his actions, not when your inaction is more destructive.”
Silence answered her as the last of her words echoed around the room but she wanted to get in one more blow.
Ash's voice trembled with anger and frustration, "Your silence and indifference this past year nearly killed me, far more effectively than Sebastian's crucio ever could."
Ominis tried to keep his devastation from showing but it was clear. Ash didn’t look at Sebastian. No, she had thoroughly insulted his oldest friend and if Sebastian hated her for this, she wanted a few more moments before she lost him again. Just a few more moments were she could feel his hands in her hair and his lips on her neck before it came crashing down—
“The lion has found her claws again, I wondered when she’d come back to play.” Sebastian purred.
Both Ash and Ominis snapped their attention to him. Sebastian had a smirk stretched across his face as his eyes swept up and down her body. Her throat bobbed when she saw no hint of anger on his features. She couldn’t read the emotions in his brown eyes. His attempt to deescalate the situation was not unnoticed by either of them. Ominis ran a hand over his face once— twice—
“Ash, I—“ Ominis sucked in a breath, his voice trembling in a way she’d never heard before and she tore her eyes from Sebastian, “I am sorry for how I handled things concerning you this past year. While I stand by the fact that I did it to protect Sebastian,” he paused and ran his fingers across the hem of his jacket nervously, “I apologize that it— that I hurt you so deeply.”
Ash blinked, her anger vanishing leaving a hollow pit in its place. She didn’t know what to say— she didn’t expect an apology. Her promise to Ominis at the end of fifth year had damaged her beyond repair. The war against Ranrok, the blood on her hands, had left her a shell of herself. But Ominis’ anger that night when he’d healed her, his venom when he’d called her poison and barred her from Sebastian— that had broken her.
She stared at Ominis and her fingers twitched at her side, desperate to run across the scarred flesh on her right cheek. The skin across her body was marred, a tapestry of pain carved right into her skin. As if each person she wronged had left their mark.
“We need to speak to Headmaster Black.” She whispered, and her gaze fell back to the stone floor. “You’re a pureblood, if you come with us he will be more amenable.”
Ominis was silent for a moment, his fingers still smoothing the hem of his jacket repeatedly. His throat bobbed and she watched the hurt written on his face drop, replaced by a coldness only a Gaunt could manage. She took in the sight of him. He was a Occlumens. Of course he was. Jealousy bubbled low in her gut— what she would give to lock away her pain and fear so easily.
Ash had been successful one time in shoving parts of herself away— behind a flimsy door in her mind. It was an accident, an accident long before she knew she had magic— one that she had never been able to recreate. That door had not withstood the events of fifth year. No, that door had splintered and shattered the day she called Sebastian a monster.
“Then I will meet you two at the spiral stairs to the Headmaster’s office.”
Ominis’ words were clipped and he turned, raising his wand once more, and left the Undercroft.
The silence was unbearable and she dared a look upwards to Sebastian. He was already staring at her, his hands still in his pockets as if unfazed by the multitude of events that had just transpired. Her mind felt near foggy when looking at him. He still had that infuriating smirk stretched across his lips and her throat bobbed.
He had kissed her.
Sebastian had kissed her.
She opened her mouth determined to talk about it— and shut it promptly as she felt her stomach drop. He had distracted her. Her magic was slumbering in her veins once more. He knew her well enough to know that she had two vices for her magic— alcohol and Garreth.
It didn’t mean anything. He had said last night he would do anything for her. That most likely included sullying himself for her sake.
He raised an eyebrow, his eyes boring holes into her, as if he wanted her to talk about it.
No, she wouldn’t bring it up. It would break her if she confirmed that it meant nothing to him. She let her gaze flick to his lips once more before she turned and faced the entrance.
“What are we going to say to Black?”
She practically mumbled the words, her voice caught in her throat as she forced her vision to stay locked on the iron gate across the room. She heard Sebastian shift behind her and a sigh left his mouth, “The least amount possible. We need to make him aware that we believe Harlow knows about the repository under Hogwarts, but—“ He sucked in a breath and stepped up beside her, his eyes flickering over her face, “But we don’t tell him that you took the magic.”
She chewed on the inside of her cheek, her eyes boring into his. “You don’t trust him.” It wasn’t a question. She dropped her gaze back to the ground.
Sebastian scoffed, his voice laced with a lethal amusement, “I wouldn’t trust a soul alive with that information. If anyone found out, that would make you a target. A weapon.”
He stepped closer and her breath hitched as his fingers softly gripped her chin and tilted her head up until their eyes locked once more.
“And since I’m playing bodyguard as you like to say, I’d prefer not to stain my clothes with the Headmaster’s blood.”
She didn’t like the way his words sent a flood of heat pooling low in her abdomen. She ignored it, and forced her eyes to roll, “I doubt Black has enough sense to even understand the implications of Harlow searching for the repository, let alone the properties of the magic itself.”
Sebastian rolled his eyes in return and dropped his fingers from her chin, though she still felt phantom traces across her skin.
“If there is anything a wizard from a house of the sacred twenty-eight can recognize, it’s power.”
He turned and headed for the gate, the metal screeching as it opened once more. He stopped at the opening once he saw she was still rooted to her spot, her mind too focused on tucking the feeling of his lips against hers, away. He raised a brow, “After you, Cendrillion.”
She willed herself to move, to keep her eyes focused on the gate and then the stairs and then the corridors filled with students milling about. She focused on that, and not the brown eyed boy beside her who she now knew groaned when he sucked on a woman’s neck.
The sound was still rattling around in her head when they met up with a stone faced Ominis standing beside the bronze Griffin statue blocking the entrance to the Headmaster’s office.
Ominis didn’t acknowledge their presence as he turned to the statue and mumbled the password given to prefects in case of emergencies. How Ominis knew the password was a mystery she had little care to solve. As the spiral stairs appeared behind the statue, Ominis stalked forward not bothering to wait for the two of them to relay the important questions they needed to voice to the Headmaster.
Sebastian rolled his eyes at Ominis’ back and followed, leaving Ash to trail at the back. The three of them had never been much for planning in the past, but marching into the Headmaster’s office on a whim had to take the cake for being underprepared.
Ash sorted through questions and statements in her mind as she ascended the steps, their shoes clicking against the stone the only sound in the echoing space.
Were you aware, Headmaster, that Harlow has escaped from Azkaban?
We regret to inform you, Headmaster, that we believe Harlow to be in search of or already in possession of the location of the final repository under Hogwarts. Please take care of this so I don’t have to.
I am in possession of raw ancient magic that threatens to destroy me and everything in my vicinity, may I have a cup of tea sir?
The three of them finally came to the top of the stairs, and Ominis clenched his jaw before pressing forward into the large open room. Sebastian spared her a glance, his eyes sweeping across her as if ensuring she wasn’t about to blow the place sky high. Whatever he saw on her face was enough reassurance because he turned and followed Ominis.
Ash paused at the threshold watching her friends’ retreating figures. She hadn’t been in this room since—
Her eyes darted up to the far left wall tucked into an alcove further into the space, where she could make out the edge of a portrait. Her throat bobbed. She hadn’t spoken to the keepers— hadn’t seen them since before professor Fig died. Before she took the magic she swore to protect.
She swallowed the fear threatening to climb up her throat. She didn’t have time for panic, or second thoughts.
Ash stepped into the large office, the morning sun streaming through the narrow windows on each side of the near-round room. She focused on the sound of Ominis’ shoes against the stone floor and the sound of Sebastian’s breathing as she moved further and further into the space.
Just as they neared the steps at the back of the office, those leading to the large wooden desk, and just as Ash dared a glance at Niamh Fitzgerald’s empty portrait— Headmaster Black strode from the raised archway behind the desk. His dark green suit jacket was tailored exquisitely, contrasted by the navy tie at his neck. She was surprised the man wasn’t holding a mirror, he was after-all the embodiment of Narcissus.
He swept down the wooden stairs, humming a jaunty tune to himself, before he jerked to a halt on the last step. His eyes narrowed as he stared at the three of them standing before his desk, the humming brought to a halt.
Ominis was the picture of pureblood perfection. His posture ramrod straight, his jaw tightened, and not a hair out of place as he turned his head in the direction of Black.
Sebastian painted a very different picture. His white button-up was wrinkled, his tie haphazard around his collar, and his brown hair messier than she’d seen in days. She kept her cheeks from heating— he looked like that because of her, because of her hands tangling in those curls. Sebastian was unfazed as the Headmaster’s scrutinizing gaze swept over him. Indeed, Sebastian could have been watching paint dry for all the boredom written across his face.
And then there was Ash. She was two steps below Sebastian and Ominis, and what a metaphor that was. She kept her chin high even as Black practically sneered at the sight of her. She fought the urge to sneer back— just as she fought the urge to smooth the rats nest of hair on her head. If only he knew this filthy muggle-born had been in his office before, had rifled through every drawer in the room, every chest. She gave him a polite smile and watched as he turned his piercing gaze back to Ominis as he strode to his desk. Black sat, his hands crossed in front of him as he plastered on a smile that looked more like a grimace.
“To what do I owe the…pleasure…of this visit Mr. Gaunt.”
The strain was not missed in Black’s voice. Neither was the deliberate intention of ignoring both her and Sebastian. Black was nothing if not predictable.
Ominis began speaking, a polite yet firm clip in his voice, but Ash was soon a million realms away. Her eyes were fixed on the empty portrait high above her left side. The copper toned backdrop felt hollow, lacking— and she felt sorrow leeching from every pore of her body. Niamh had been kind, understanding, and Ash had found herself drawn to her warmth. And then she betrayed her.
She was no better than Isidora.
The thought twisted something inside of her so violently she dug her nails into the soft flesh of her palms to bring herself back to the present.
“—family is perfectly well Headmaster Black, and how is your sister? I heard she was recently appointed to the Wizengamot.”
The pleasantries hadn’t ended yet apparently, and Ominis hid his displeasure for the topic so well that if she didn’t know him she’d suspect he was just as foul as the rest of his name.
“Oh yes, indeed she was. Quite the brain she is. Now what can I help you with Mr. Gaunt?”
Black’s tone was still clipped, though the ice in his piercing gaze had softened ever so slightly with the help of ‘Mr. Gaunt.’
Ash dared a step closer, bringing her only one step below the two Slytherins at her side. “Headmaster Black, as the Hero of Hogwarts,” she felt zero remorse for using the title granted to her fifth year, especially when she saw the corner of Sebastian’s mouth twitch, “I feel it is my duty to ensure that you are aware—“
“Miss Cendrillion, are you assuming that there is anything that occurs in my school that I am unaware of?”
The disdain was clear in Black’s voice, even if he didn’t meet her eye. No, his gaze was firmly locked on Ominis.
She paused and bit down hard enough on her tongue that she tasted the familiar copper tang of blood. She couldn’t afford to get angry. She needed to readjust and—
“Sir, you were unaware fifth year that a goblin had infiltrated the caverns under Hogwarts until after the battle, were you not?” Sebastian drawled.
She snapped her eyes to him in warning but his gaze was firmly locked on the Headmaster. He still looked bored, but she saw the way his casting hand twitched at his side.
Black looked murderous, his face scrunched in contempt. His dark eyes settled on Sebastian right as Ominis stepped forward, his hands clasped behind his back. She could see the tension radiating from him, could see his perfectly manicured nails digging into his palms.
“Headmaster Black, I believe what my two companions are attempting to say, is that you are an incredibly busy man.” The compliment landed exactly how Ominis intended as Black leaned back into his chair and raised a brow. Ominis continued without pause, “We simply, as caring students of your fine school, wished to ensure that you were informed of an update on the repository situation. We know a man of your importance cannot stoop to weed out fact from fiction, so we wished to provide insight.”
She could practically see the gears turning in Black’s mind, but he simply sighed and waved a hand in impatience, “Fine. Go on then about this repository, but make it quick.”
Ash stepped forward again as Ominis inclined his head to her. She swallowed the desire to rip the mustache right off Black’s face. Instead she clasped her hands behind her back, mirroring Ominis’ placating posture.
“Sir, we believe that Theophilus Harlow, who recently escaped from Azkaban, will attempt to succeed where both Victor Rookwood and Ranrok failed.” She swallowed the memories flashing behind her eyes as Rookwood’s name passed her lips. “We believe that he is in the process of determining the location of the repository under Hogwarts—“
“You children came to these conclusions all on your own?” Black interrupted.
She blinked a few times, throwing a look to Ominis who simply clenched his jaw at the interruption. She let out a breath, “Well yes—“
“Then excuse me if I do not take your word for it.” The headmaster snorted and stood from his seat before brushing a hand down his lapels, “I assure you Hogwarts is safe. Now run along—“
“Harlow might have the journals that would—“
“Miss Cendrillion. It would do you some good to learn respect.” Black glared at her and she felt the rage clawing at her insides. The look he gave her was so similar to Headmistress Beckett that she broke her gaze.
Sebastian clenched his fists at his side but Black continued as he began sweeping back up the stairs behind his desk, “Do not worry yourself with Bragbor’s journals, child. Why not focus on that simpering celebration your house is throwing this weekend, that students believe the staff know nothing about.” He sneered. Black paused at the upper landing and glanced at Ominis, “Mr. Gaunt, I implore you to choose better company. Send your father my regards.”
Headmaster Black’s footsteps faded as he made his exit. A cold numbness spread across her body as she stared at the empty portrait to her left. She had not expected much from this meeting but she had expected…help? Recognition? Something that justified the agony she put herself through fifth year for the sake of this place.
And now she’d have to do it all again.