Chapter 1
September of 1976 brought many changes to the Hogwarts eco-system. Toward the end of the previous academic year, there was an incident. The problem was that nobody knew exactly what had happened. There were rumours, of course, but nobody actually knew. Nobody except the five that had been called into Dumbeldores office; Remus Lupin, James Potter, Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew, and Severus Snape.
Sirius had already gotten his fair share of attention that year, having run away from the Ancient and Most Noble House of Black on Christmas Day, and seeking refuge with the Potters. He’d been on a rampage ever since. Daily detentions for pranks and outbursts, most of which were targeted at the Slytherins in his year and above, but some still catching the occasional Hufflepuff first year. However, Sirius Black lost and gained attention in the midst of the O.W.Ls. Something had happened. For the final few weeks of term, he sat apart from the rest of the Marauders, who refused to acknowledge his existence. A third-year girl had mentioned in potions that he’d slept on the couch in the common room once or twice but was now sleeping with the fifth-year girls.
When September came, Remus Lupin boarded the Hogwarts Express with newfound confidence. The prank Sirius pulled had forced him to face the reality of his condition. Remus Lupin was a monster, and he fucking loved it. Over the summer the headmistress at his group home had shaved his head, a style he opted to keep. He spent 90% of his time outdoors, and so his scarred skin was now a golden caramel. Dressed in a grey tank, black cargo and Doc Martens adorned in badges, Remus Lupin sat alone on the Hogwarts Express. When James found him, he was rolling up a cigarette.
“You look cool, Moony” he said, sitting across from him in the compartment. Peter scurried behind him with a look of mild terror.
“When did you get those tattoos?” he squeaked, blue eyes trailing up Remus’s arms. That was another new addition, the tattoos. Remus sold tobacco to younger posh boys that went to summer school near his home, making a fortune by adding his own interest. He’d gotten the phases of the moon down his spine first, followed by a wolf curled around his entire left arm. The wolf’s mouth was dripping blood, with tufts of black fur scattered underneath it. After those two he’d gotten loads more - verses from the Iliad, a Willow tree. “Got ‘em over summer” he muttered, choosing to ignore the look on James’ face.
“You didn’t answer any of our letters, Moony” James sighed, rubbing his eyes underneath his glasses. Remus huffed a laugh. He’d read their letters. Constant plea’s to forgive Sirius, his home life was hard, after all. As if Sirius is the only one with issues.
“You didn’t write to me, you wrote for Sirius. I had no interest in responding to that” Remus muttered, taking a drag from his fresh rollie. James and Peter left after that, closing the compartment door after them.
—
The welcome feast was exactly what Remus had expected. James and Peter sat with Sirius, who kept shooting nervous glances at Remus. Most people were staring at him, in all fairness. Even with his uniform on, his neck and hands were covered with tattoos, and a crescent moon was peeking out above his collar at the end of his neck. Lily had come up and asked about his summer, although he’d written back to her. He had no issue with Lily. If anything, she was his favourite person at the moment. They’d written back and forth over the summer and even met a few times in London for drinks. They usually stayed at a hotel as neither were from the capital, and the hotel had only one bed. At first, it had been a way for them both to lose their virginity to somebody they trusted, but eventually, it became reliable. They weren’t compatible sexually, not really. Whilst Lily adored Remus’s calloused hands and the way they cupped her face, she didn’t appreciate their tendency to end up around her throat. They called off their little rendezvous at the end of July when they realised that they weren’t as compatible as they had originally thought.
Remus didn’t return to the dorms until well after midnight, in order to avoid awkward silence. And anyway, he needed a smoke. When he did go into the shared room, the rest of the boys were asleep. He decided to put strong silencing charms around his bed, and locking charms on his trunk. He’d brought enough cigarettes to sell to the entire school population, and Peter tended to have sticky fingers.
–
The first week of the term went exactly as anyone would expect, sideways glances and whispers when Remus entered a room or walked down a corridor. The same happened when Remus attended the first Prefect meeting of the year (a job you were not allowed to reject, as it happens). Remus had to transfigure a spoon into a new badge as the original was silver - not that Dumbledore gave a fuck, apparently. Lily had saved him a seat, and so Remus was wedged in between her and the seventh-year Gryffindor prefect, Alice.
The head boy had a tendency to waffle, and so Remus spent the entire meeting playing with a lock of Lily’s hair, an action that she didnt comment on. She had a thing for people touching her hair, something Remus had discovered quite quickly during their short-lived affair.
“Lupin, are you fucking deaf?’ a voice snapped, waking Remus from his daydreams. Regulus Black stood in front of Remus with a scowl on his face. His very attractive face. Regulus resembles Sirius and yet looked the exact opposite of him at the same time. His dark curls were kept short and neat, except for at the top of his hair. His pale skin glowed like moonlight, illuminating his grey eyes. Sirius’ eyes were grey in the way that silver was, they shone with life and mischief. Regulus’ eyes were grey like a storm cloud, dark and cold. In all honesty, the black brothers were extremely attractive.
“Since you need to be caught up, we’ve been partnered up for the term. Mondays, Wednesdays and Sundays. That’s our schedule. Seeing that today is a Sunday, we may as well begin” Regulus sighed, walking out the door swiftly. It didn’t take long for Remus to catch up. Regulus was quite small, at least a foot shorter than Remus.
“What’s got you so grouchy, baby Black?” he hummed, relishing in the annoyance that took over Regulus’s face.
“Don’t call me that” Regulus snapped, running a hand through his hair. He had a ring on nearly every finger. Most of them were silver bands with intricate designs, some ruins that Remus recognised. The largest ring was on his pinky finger, his signet ring. It was adorned with the Black family crest and creed - Toujours Pur. Regulus didn’t answer Remus, a fact he chose to ignore. He liked silence after all. This silence especially. It felt comfortable, neither boy felt any desire to speak or fill the silence. It was two hours into their patrol when Remus pulled a cigarette from his pocket and lit it that Regulus acknowledged his presence.
“You smoke?” He asked, eyebrows raised.
“I do. Fancy one?” Remus asked, taking the piss. It shocked him when Regulus nodded lightly. He took the lit cigarette from Remus’s hand and inhaled like it was the first bit of air he’d had in years.
“Well fuck me, didn’t peg you as a smoker, baby Black” Remus chuckled, getting himself a new smoke. Regulus laughed lightly, it was a pretty sound, Remus decided. They didn’t talk again that evening, simply walking back to their own common rooms when the clock struck midnight. On Monday, their patrol went the same as the last, comfortable silence and a smoke halfway through.
On Wednesday, Remus got Lily to cover his patrol as it was a full moon. His pack had shown up at the shack, but Moony was not happy. He snapped and bared his teeth at the great big dog. Within an hour, the stag had to hold Moony down so that the dog could escape. Moony spent the rest of the night alone, much like he had all summer.
On Sunday, Regulus was waiting for Remus outside of the Great Hall. “You look like shit, is that why I had to endure Evans on Wednesday?” he asked, raking his eyes up and down Remus’s form. In all fairness, he did look like shit. Prongs had broken two ribs whilst attempting to hold Moony back, and then Moony decided to tear himself apart from the frustration.
“Pissed off at being paired with a Muggleborn, baby Black?” Remus snapped, not in the mood to argue with a bigot whilst his body felt as shitty as it did.
“If I have no issue with being paired with a werewolf, why on earth would I be annoyed about being paired with a muggle born?” Regulus stated, beginning to walk their usual route. His air of casualness shocked Remus almost as much as his revelation.
Remus froze, “You know?”. The vulnerability in his own voice shocked him. It had been a while since he’d had this conversation. He came to terms with his lycanthropy this summer, very much embracing it. He allowed Moony to voice his opinions and began to form a relationship with the wolf, it made transformations much easier. But Regulus knowing was still a risk, especially if he was anything like Sirius made him out to be.
“I’m not daft. Since I arrived at this school you’ve been ill around the full moon. Not to mention the scars, and that stupid name my idiot brother uses for you” Regulus stated, as though it were nothing.
“Why haven’t you had me kicked out of the school?” Remus asked, dumbfounded.
The younger boy stared at him as though he was the stupidest being he’d ever encountered. “Lupin, despite what my brother may have told you, I'm not prejudiced. Granted, I do think that I’m better than everybody in this place, but that’s nothing to do with blood. As for your affliction, I’m more impressed at your ability to maintain grades whilst being out of commission once a month”, he sighed.
Remus didn’t respond. He just walked beside Regulus in silence until the middle of their patrol, when they stood at the astronomy tower and smoked. When Regulus smoked, he was annoyingly attractive. His jawline became more prominent when his blush-pink lips met the cigarette. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Moony was happy, he was content to watch the boy smoke, for now.