Take 2

Severus felt the sudden, great, urge to sob as he hadn’t felt since he was much, much, younger than thirty-eight. Or twenty-one.

Holding the tiny, warm, body in his arms, sitting on the Dursley’s Welcome mat felt unreal. Maybe it was, there was no way to know if he was actually being given a chance to fix his mistakes, or if something else was going on. But, there was no way he was taking the chance and accidentally wasting his second chance as well by spending too much of his little time trying to figure out if it was real or not.

He needed to get out of here.

But to where? What was he supposed to do? Go?

He wasn’t a professor yet as he didn’t start teaching until Slughorn was forced to retire in a couple months because of declining health, his family were dead, he had no friends, and the war was over, so he really didn’t have any ties, nor did Harry Potter.

Harry Potter.

The child couldn’t keep the name ‘Harry Potter’. Severus wasn’t going to completely take away his history, wouldn’t lie about being his bio father, but it would be unsafe to keep the same names.

Shaking his head, Severus quickly stood, making sure to grab the basket and useless note so Petunia didn’t get a surprise in a few hours, and apparated back to his childhood home.

He would not, could not, raise Harry here, but he needed a place to stay for a while as he worked everything out. 

As the boy was still asleep, he re-wrapped him in the blanket as it was slipping, then laid him on the worn out couch with as many protection charms as he could remember. Nothing here was salvable, but that was fine. It would just make his get-away cleaner.

Severus walked across the room, all of seven feet, and sat on the old red armchair his father favored, being careful to avoid the giant spring sticking out, and grabbed an old notebook and pen from beneath it. Only he knew about the muggle writing tools there as he hid them twenty-five—eight?—years ago for when he needed paper that didn’t have eviction notes on the other side.

Usually Severus wouldn’t write down important information like this as he knew how critical the smallest thing could be thanks to his years of being a spy, but he thought this was an exception as it would be unsolvable to about anyone who didn’t have all the information. 

LN:

He wrote at the top of the page before beginning to think of possible last names the two could begin using as ‘Potter’ and ‘Snape’ weren’t safe if anyone tried to find them.

Evans- Pros: Connection to Harry, common last name, muggle; Cons: Connection to Harry

Prince- Pros: Connection to me; Cons: Magical, pureblood family, well-known, connection to me

Other- Pros: Harder to track; Cons: Takes more time to choose, no connection

Severus groaned looking at the list, the biggest problem being the fact that connection was both a pro and con.

Looking at the list again he decided that it needed to either be Prince or Evans, a different name would just take too long and might connect them to other people. It seemed obvious that it needed to be Evans as it had more pros and less cons, but he still felt unsure for some reason.

They were all dead.

The only Evans left was Petunia and she both had a different last name now and he didn’t want to be anything like here. Did those two things cancel each other out?

It didn’t matter, it had to be Evans.

Thank Merlin everyone would always remember her as ‘Lily Potter’ because of her death and not ‘Lilian Grace Evans’, otherwise everything would be much harder.

FN:

Now he needed to figure out their first names, and then middle but that could wait until the first names were chosen. Harry could stay Harry as it was very common and basic, but Severus himself needed a new one.

How many people this century were named Severus?

He wanted it to be a plant name because all of the Evans’s had plant names, but he wasn’t entirely sure which one.

Well, this was an unexpected way that being a potioneer was helpful.

Basil: Fine, not exactly me

Sage: Not me

Cosmos: Too Black Family

Olive: Not me

Oliver: Oliver Wood

Cedar: Doesn’t sound like a name

Ash: Too short

Clover: Maybe, not the best

Oak: Too short, not very name-like

Rowan: Maybe, could be better

Severus looked at the names he had left after the purging and didn’t feel very confident.

Basil

Clover

Rowan

He was extremely discouraged, until he realized that it could always be a middle name instead of first.

MN:

— Basil Evans: Really nice, first name might change that

— Clover Evans: Sort of wrong, can be saved by first name

— Rowan Evans: Might be saved by first name, probably not though

Really now, what should his new first name be?

FN:

Septimius- Pros: I was named after Septimius Severus; Cons: Doesn’t sound the best

Sev- Pros: Easy to get used to; Cons: Easy to identify, too short, doesn’t feel like a real name

Tobias- Pros: Unidentifiable; Cons: I WILL NOT HAVE THE SAME NAME AS MY FATHER

Toby- Pros: Unidentifiable; Cons: I WILL NOT HAVE THE SAME NAME AS MY FATHER

Elliot- Pros: Unidentifiable, related to my mother; Cons: Do I really want a first and last name that starts with the same letter again?

Ellis- Pros: Unidentifiable, related to my mother; Cons: Do I really want a first and last name that starts with the same letter again?

Ethan- Pros: Unidentifiable, related to my mother; Cons: Do I really want a first and last name that starts with the same letter again? Not me

Edward- Pros: Unidentifiable, related to my mother; Cons: Do I really want a first and last name that starts with the same letter again? Not me, Ted Tonks/Teddy Lupin

Severus rubbed his eyes, suddenly exhausted, but he couldn’t give up now. He had to figure out a new, connected, but unidentifiable name that felt like him.

But, who was he?

He had never had time to figure out who he was, what he liked. His father definitely wasn’t going to let him do any self-exploration, not that they had any money for it, and his whole adulthood was spent being a spy, even when the war was in intermission.

Who was Severus Tobias Snape? Who was — Basil/Clover/Rowan Evans?

He didn’t have the time to soul-search right now, but he also couldn’t spend however long he had here with a name he detested.

Merlin, he hated the name Severus.

FN:

Lincoln- Pros: Unidentifiable, connected to Lily; Cons: Not me

Lane- Pros: Unidentifiable, connected to Lily; Cons: Not me, too short

Augustus- Pros: Unidentifiable, a Roman Emperor(like Septimius Severus); Cons: Not me, kind of pretentious 

Hadrian- Pros: Unidentifiable, a Roman Emperor(like Septimius Severus); Cons: Not me, too similar to Harry

Virgil.

He didn’t know why, where the inspiration came from, but it had to be Virgil. Virgil Clover Evans.

It had no obvious connections to his previous self besides a love for poetry, it was pretentious, and it sounded like the name no one would ever consider for their baby.

It was perfect.

Virgil Clover Evans. He was Virgil Clover Evans, and there was nothing anyone could do about it.

But, what about Harry’s middle name?

People would look over Harry Evans as both names were common, even more so in the muggle world, but Harry James Evans? That might be going a little too far, as were similar names like Jamie or Jacob.

Maybe he shouldn’t have a middle name?

Harry Evans felt incomplete, but was it really right for him to get to pick the child’s name? A change of last name was unavoidable, but first and middle?

If it changed from being Harry or James, then the child himself should pick it. Severus—no, Virgil, he would need to get used to being called that—had no right to.

Harry James Evans.

‘James’ just wasn’t safe. It had to be Harry Evans.

Hopefully he wouldn’t be angry when he found out, still, Virgil would rather his…son…be angry at him than dead because Lucius Malfoy or Voldemort or someone found them.

Severus Tobias Snape and Harry James Potter were different enough from Virgil Clover and Harry Evans, weren’t they?

No time to pick other ones, so it’d have to do.

Now what?

He had their names picked, but what other parts of their identities needed changed? Harry was just a baby, he could end up like anything, so nothing really needed to change there. Even his parents death wasn’t that uncommon of a story. There was his scar, but that would need to be dealt with later, everything else though, could stay.

But, Virgil? As an adult everything was too messy.

He could stay a half-blood with a muggle father, but he had better make his mother lower in status—perhaps a first generation pureblood coming from a line of muggleborns? And he could keep smaller things like his birthday, but his whole appearance would need to change and he couldn’t have gone to Hogwarts.

What school, then? None would really work as if anyone tried to find his enrollment information, it wouldn’t exist, and he couldn’t risk forging it as no one who went there would remember him.

Homeschooled then.

And his appearance?

Basic hygiene and otherwise taking care of his health like he never had the time or money for before would go a long way, as would new clothes, but he was probably do for a new hairstyle, and maybe those glasses he had been putting off getting his whole life.

How should he do his hair?

He didn’t like the idea of it being super short, but shoulder-length or longer also didn’t really fit him. Perhaps that curly, chin-length, way he also kept it before starting Hogwarts? The one his father hated for being too girly?

Virgil gave a rare smile, something that would need to start being less rare if he was to raise a child, he really liked the idea of doing something that would have upset his father.

Maybe he could dye his hair as well? He wanted to as a teen, but didn’t have a chance and the wars made it impossible as well. Even in-between the two wars it would have been dangerous, and most of all made the students respect him less.

But, he could do it now. He was young, at least in body, so no one would be surprised, it would help hide his previous identity, and it would feel good.

Severus wasn’t used to doing things just because he wanted to or because they would make him feel good, but Virgil was a new person with a new life, so he refused to still be bound by those old, pointless thoughts and fears.

What color?

Red felt weird, too Lily, and blonde wasn’t right either, he could technically do brown, but he really didn’t think he would be happy as a brunette. But, that was all the colors—would he have to keep black hair?

Unless he did a non-natural one.

Virgil didn’t really know why, but this thought made him gasp, air rapidly filling his lungs. He had always felt disdain for Tonks’s ever-changing ‘odd’ hair colors, and the people who did it to themselves manually, but….

Maybe having colored hair wouldn’t be so bad.

Still, he had to pick the color.

He didn’t want something very…Nymphadora Tonks….Things like pink and orange and green just weren’t right. At the same time: purple and gray and such colors were a bit too dark.

The only color he could really think of liking on himself was blue.

Was blue his favorite color? He wasn’t sure, had never really thought about what colors he did and didn’t like before, but blue really did sound nice. In general, but also for his hair.

He would particularly like a dark blue, he thought he looked good with a dark color contrasting against his pale skin, but….

Would it look weird? Would anyone take him seriously? Should he just keep it black—at most make it a different natural color?

Virgil shook his head to clear his thoughts. It was his hair and he could do whatever he wanted to with it. Besides, if it really was that bad, he could just use magic to get rid of it.

What else needed to change? Could anything?

Technically, he could change everything about both of their appearances, but….He couldn’t do that to Harry, and he didn’t particularly want to change his own body outside of natural ways.

He would finally fix his nose.

He wasn’t going to completely change it, there was nothing wrong with having a Roman Nose, and he refused to contribute to the idea that such a nose was undesirable, but, there were so many ‘buts’ today, the crookedness from the many times it was broke did make him more identifiable. 

It would be nice to be able to breathe properly again, to sound less nasally. Touching it would hurt less too.

Shorter blue hair, a non-damaged nose, glasses, and whatever eating and such did to his body—being a little less thin, less pale, less sickly looking—was surely enough to keep people from realizing who he was, right? Plus his new name.

It would have to do.

Now he just needed a new house, belongings for him and Harry, money, whatever he could salvage from the Potter’s cottage, legal name changes, a legal adoption, and anything else he could think of.

TTD:

Virgil wrote on the top of the back of the same page, the last of the paper he would hopefully need. TTD—Things To Do.

House: Gringotts?

Money: A little bit of the Potter’s for immediate needs(leave rest for adult Harry), later sell potions(write books?)

Name changes: Gringotts?

Adoption: Gringotts? 

Potter Cottage: After everything else, but soon

Hair/Glasses: Private, public too dangerous(Gringotts?)

Other belongings: Probably muggle

Virgil looked at the list again before realizing that he would need paper so he would have a list of things to buy, which he probably needed to do before they started so he didn’t run out of time. Gringotts didn’t even open to witches and wizards for another four or so hours anyway, so he had plenty of time to burn.

My Stuff:

Clothes

Books

Bed

Linens

Desk

Potions stuff

Toiletries

Writing supplies(probably muggle, quills are inefficient) 

Harry’s Stuff:

Crib(when do kids start needing toddler beds?)

Bottle/sippy cup(whichever one fifteen month olds use)

Diapers/Baby Powder/Baby Wipes

Potty chair(he’ll need it in about a year, I think)

Clothes

Changing table

Teething toys(still teething I think, I’ll ask a store person about this stuff, they’ll probably know better than me)

Toys/stuffed animals(he’ll need a lot since he doesn’t have any yet)

Plastic crockery(maybe all our crockery should be plastic, I don’t want anything to break and ceramic isn’t a necessity)

High chair

Stroller?

Baby/toddler books

Baby toiletries(baby shampoo and all that)

Floaties(for learning to swim next summer, if he’s old enough(do I know how to swim? I haven’t since I was a kid and I taught myself, so I might want to check that I can before teaching him))

Maybe other stuff if it seems necessary

General Stuff:

Books

T.V.?

Table

Couch

Crockery

Board Games

Coffee Table

Kitchen Table

Refrigerator

Freezer

Spice Cabinet 

Cooking Stuff

Garbage Cans

Toilet Paper/Paper Towels

Over the counter medicine/potions(just for until we’re settled in and I can start making it)

Food

Drinks

Virgil yawned looking over his list a couple more times before deciding it was the best he could do at the moment. Of course, they would need more than that, but he had the bare necessities and could probably figure everything out later. 

He just had one more thing to figure out: what was he supposed to do with Harry while he did everything?

The child would need to go with him to Gringotts just in case they would let him do the adoption and name changes there. He knew they were services provided, but usually not to witches and wizards. It having to do with Harry made it more likely the Goblins would be favorable to him as they liked young of all species, but it still wasn’t a set in stone thing, even though Virgil had never done anything to them himself. But, everything else was a bit much to put him through, especially since it would take too long.

And what about feeding and changing him? It was just impossible.

His first thought was to leave Harry with Poppy all day, but he wasn’t entirely sure she wouldn’t report him to Dumbledore who could not know about this. His second thought was the Goblins who he knew would never tell anyone or hurt a child, but they were busy and he doubted they had the supplies either. He could technically get a babysitter, but there was no way he was leaving his baby with a stranger all day right after he got him.

So, what?

Virgil hit his head against his arms which he crossed on top of the chair arm to his right seconds before. He had just remembered the other, nearly impossible, problem he would need to solve.

What could he do about his tattoo and Harry’s scar?

His tattoo wasn’t the biggest thing in the world, he could have it covered with a different tattoo or maybe even remove it. When Voldemort was in power that was impossible as it connected them to him, so if they tried tattooing over it or removing it or damaging it, they would die. But, in-between the wars and after he died, if he died, during The Battle of Hogwarts, it was doable as he wasn’t really alive. It would probably be better to remove it, though, as if he just covered it than when Voldemort returned he would be forced to rejoin, or, more likely, killed for disobeying.

But, Harry’s scar was harder. The scar itself would be easy to remove as there were tons of potions for it. The problem was getting the piece of Voldemort out so A) Harry wouldn’t be a horcrux anymore, B) it would make him less identifiable, and C) so the scar was no longer ‘cursed’ and therefore removable(otherwise the unidentifiable part would be null). 

There was also the problem of Harry looking so similar to James, but there was a good chance that if he was raised in an environment where he had more than the bare minimum, if you could even say the Dursley’s gave him that much, then he would look much different. If not, they would be living in a different country, maybe continent, anyway, so it would be excusable. 

Still, he really needed to find a way to get rid of the horcrux, without killing Harry. The boy was still a horcrux the last time Virgil saw him, so there was no way for him to know if it was survivable, but that seemed unlikely. Then again: Harry was the first living thing to be a horcrux that Virgil knew about, so there was no way to know without trying.  

He wouldn’t kill Harry, but….Was letting him keep the scar a death sentence in itself? Even if they weren’t discovered, Harry would eventually have to die to kill Voldemort.

Virgil took a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves so he didn’t fall into a panic attack; he probably needed therapy, but no one would ever believe him about all he had been through, and even if he convinced them with his memories, they would probably expose his secrets. Still, he needed to stop thinking about The Scar Problem right now, hopefully the Goblins would have an answer as their medical knowledge and practices were much different than witches and wizards. If not…he would make sure the child was safe and healthy, no matter what.

Slightly more calm, Virgil looked over at the peaceful, sleeping child and longed to do the same himself. He still needed to figure out what to do about taking care of him throughout the rest of the day, but it was impossible with no sleep.

This decided, Virgil set an alarm for 4:30 A.M., and curled up next to Harry to get just a few hours of sleep. It wasn’t much, but it was better than nothing.

Hopefully things would be clearer after a little bit of rest.