Hunky Dory
Sirius really couldn’t stop thinking about Moony.
He couldn’t tell if it was his hair, or his eyes, there was just something magical about him.
And James could tell.
“Somebody’s in love.” James said in a sing-song voice.
“Oh piss off Potter.” Sirius moaned. “I never act like this with Evans.”
“Sirius, it’s not healthy to lie to yourself.” James mockingly explained. “Besides, I can’t say I blame you. He is quite the looker.”
“God please don’t do this.”
“Do what? I’m merely supporting your feelings for our new marauder.” James shrugged. Sirius shushed him, panicking Remus would hear him around the corner. Now granted, they were in the abandoned bathroom, the two boys usual hang out space during free time, but there was always the chance of it.
“I just hate it.” Sirius moaned, putting his face in his hands, trying to claw his face off.
“Hate how you fall for everyone super easily?”
“No, I-” Sirius started but realized James was right. “But it just feels different this time.”
“Why’s that?
“I’m not sure… Maybe it’s because I’m actually sort of becoming friends with him, or maybe it’s because I’m not sure he’s gay, or that he even likes me, I just don’t know. He’s just so….” Sirius groaned. James patted his foot and got up to look in the mirror. “God how many times are you going to check in the mirror today?”
“As much as it takes to come to the realization what it is that Lily hates.” James sighed.
“Mate, I think it’s time to move on. You’ve liked her for ages and she clearly can’t reciprocate those feelings.”
“I know, Pads, I know.”
“Then why are you still trying?”
James had to think hard about it. He wasn’t actually sure. James couldn’t even remember the last time he had tried to pursue Lily. The two actually had grown surprisingly close this year, and James did really value his friendship with her.
“Maybe it’s because I’ve thought I’ve been in love with her ever since year 4, and I know how upset little me would be if he figured out I didn’t at least try.”
“Can you imagine how upset Lily would be if you only saw her as something to win?”
James thought and couldn’t really think of a rebuttal to his best friend. Sirius was always a very observant person, so he usually came up with the best solutions.
“Well, I just want someone.” James moaned. He threw himself on top of Sirius and Sirius patted his head. "I don't care who just someone to call my own, you know?"
“Don’t we all?” Sirius laughed. “Don't worry, I have approximately two hundred cousins, so if you want someone, I’m sure my family would be glad to introduce a new pure-blood pipeline.”
“Yeah, I’m not that desperate.” James joked. Sirius faked gasped, acting appalled by the news, hitting his head and broke out into a fit of laughter. James followed suit, Sirius's laugh being contagious.
~•~
“God, how many times am I going to have to ask you to stop smoking those damn cigarettes?” Regulus moaned. Sirius had been waiting for him to get to the car forever, and he smoked cigarettes to kill the time a lot recently.
“I’ll stop smoking them when you get to the damn car on time.” Sirius mumbled. He turned the key and the car engine roared. He adjusted in his seat to sit comfortably and drive, throwing his cigarette out of the window.
“So never?”
“Precisely.” Sirius smiled. He ruffled Regulus’s hair and Regulus grabbed his hand, throwing it down.
“You know I hate it when you do that.” Regulus complained, fixing his hair in the mirror.
“Hence why I love it.”
“Piss off.”
“You first.”
The rest of the car ride was silent, which was how it was on most days. The two boys had totally opposite interests and friends, so there was almost absolutely no crossover.
“If you want some music, just look in the usual spot. You know what’s in there.” Sirius offered. Regulus shrugged and didn’t look. After a minute, Sirius couldn’t handle the silence. “God, just pull out Bowie. Or Queen. Anything, I just can’t sit in silence.”
“Fine.” Regulus sighed, pulling out a Fleetwood Mac CD.
“Interesting choice.” Sirius approved. Regulus raised his eyebrow, but put the CD in, Stevie Nicks voice blaring over the speakers. Regulus closed his eyes, and rested his head on the headrest, staying like that the whole way home.
~•~
Sirius parked the car inside the garage, slamming his door. Regulus seemed to have fallen asleep on the drive, startled by the sound.
“Jesus Christ Sirius.” He whined. Sirius smiled and went inside. He ran up the stairs before his parents could see him, throwing his bag on a chair in his room. He flung himself onto his bed, head first. He laid there for a few minutes, still fixated on Moony. Once he finally got up, he went over to his record player, looking at what he was previously playing. Hunky Dory . Sirius figured he’d keep it, placing the needle down and grabbing his school bag. He pulled out his homework, and sighed at the pile. He didn’t have much homework, but with exams in a few months, he couldn’t tell if he should start studying, or do what he usually does and wait until the last minute.
He decided to wait until it was closer to exams, and pulled out his math homework. He always started with the most difficult. He started to solve the problems, but he couldn’t focus. He went to his chair in the corner of the room, picking up his landline and dialing James’s number. He picked up almost immediately.
“Hello?” James' voice rang through.
“Hello there, hot stuff.” Sirius laughed.
“Oh hello there.”
“What are you doing?”
“Oh, just reading that book you gave me.”
“ Pride & Prejudice ?”
“No, the horror one. I think Stephen King’s his name.”
“Oh, The Shining ?”
“Let me look.” Sirius could hear James rustling around on the other end. “Yep! It’s pretty good so far!”
“Well only the best for the best.”
“Oh, why thank you Pads.”
“I’m bored.” Sirius sighed. “Can I come over for dinner?”
“I mean both my parents are out and I didn’t ask about dinner, but you can come over if you want!”
“Great!” Sirius cheered, but then he thought for a second. “Oh shit, I can’t. My parents make it a huge deal that every Monday we eat as a family.”
“Since when do you listen to your parents?”
“Ever since they started using Reggie as a little puppet to keep me around. He’s the only reason I haven’t run away, period.”
James paused on the other line. Sirius shifted in his seat, adjusting to sit more comfortably. “Are we ever going to meet Regulus, Sirius?”
“You’ve met him!”
“Uh uh.” James protested. Sirius rolled his eyes.
“James, you have. It was in passing possibly once, but you have when we were much younger.”
“Oh yeah. Forgot about that.” James chuckled.
“And as usual I’m right.”
“Oh piss off Black.”
“Odd, I’ve had two people tell me that today.”
“Maybe you should take it as a sign?”
“Nah, both of them were from absolute nuisances, so I think I’ll be fine.” Sirius smiled.
“So Remus hasn’t told you yet?” James teased. Sirius’s face went bright red and he hung up on James. Sirius pulled out a piece of paper he had been holding very dearly all day and looked at the scrawny handwriting. Remus had given Sirius the number of his phone, but Sirius wasn’t sure if it was his own phone or the boy's home. He stared at the piece of paper for a long time.
After a while, Sirius finally decided to try. It couldn’t hurt to try. Sirius began dialing and kept thinking of what to say. ‘Hey Remus’ sounded too forced, ‘Yo Moony’ was just pretentious, and ‘Is this Remus Lupin per chance’ was all sorts of wrong. The phone started to ring, but somebody picked up almost instantly. Shit, has he been waiting for me to call?
“Hello?” A voice asked. Sirius was confident in his ability to tell it was Remus on the other end, but figured it’d be better to ask.
“Hey, it’s Sirius. Is this Remus?” He questioned.
“Yep! Hey Padfoot!” Remus responded. Sirius could practically hear his smile. Sirius smiled and took a sigh of relief.
~•~
Sirius wasn’t sure how long the two of them had talked, but it was long enough to where Regulus came to Sirius to tell him it was time for dinner.
“I’ll be there in a few, let me just finish this call with Remus really quickly.”
“Well there isn’t going to be a few because Mum’s been waiting and she’s pissed. Hang up the phone.” Sirius shushed Regulus and he rolled his eyes. “You have thirty seconds.”
“Okay, okay. Look, Moony, I have to go. My absolute annoyance of a brother is dragging me to dinner.”
Remus laughed. “It’s okay, Pads. I’ll see you tomorrow!”
“Yeah!” Sirius paused. “Bye Moony!”
“Bye Pads.” Remus laughed. Sirius hung up the phone and hung his head back. He covered his face with his hands, hiding his smile.
“God, love makes people fools.” Regulus sighed. Sirius instantly sat up.
“I am not in love!” Sirius yelped, throwing his pillow at Regulus. Unfortunately, Regulus was used to Sirius’s drama, so he caught it and threw it on his bed instead.
“Sure you aren’t. Now let's go.”
Sirius reluctantly got up and trudged behind Regulus.
“Who is it?” Regulus asked as they walked down the narrow hallway.
Sirius thought for a second, but told him. “His name's Remus. He’s new, but he’s really funny and he’s just so…”
“Perfect?” Regulus asked, practically finishing Sirius’s sentence. Sirius nodded. “Don’t worry, it won’t last. Trust me.”
“Always an optimist, aren’t you Reggie?”
“Only with love, big brother.” Regulus smirked. Sirius laughed and pushed Regulus lightly.
“What is it you two are talking about?” A voice piped up. Sirius whined and gave a look to Regulus. Regulus shrugged his shoulders, looking defeated.
“Don’t bring it up.” Sirius mouthed. Regulus nodded and turned around to face the voice.
“Nothing Mother.” Regulus smiled. Sirius knew it was a fake one, but that was the norm in the house. “Just about school and such.”
“You’re lying.” She confidently responds. “You two were talking about love.”
Sirius sighed. “We weren’t Mum.”
“Don’t lie to me Sirius Orion Black.”
“I’m not Walpurga.”
“You know how I hate it when you lie.”
“I know. And it’d be horrible if I were right now.” Sirius faked, praying Orion wasn’t around the corner. Sure, he could handle his mom, maybe even his dad if he was feeling bold, but the two of them together was an impossible feat.
“Fine. Let’s go eat dinner and we’ll discuss this with your father.” Walpurga smiled, likely fake, and walked to the dining room. Sirius and Regulus exchanged a glance, neither looking forward to the meal, and followed suit. They took their seats at the table, placing their napkins on their laps.
“So, how was school boys?” Orion asked a few minutes into the meal.
“Fine.”
“Fine.”
Silence grew over the table again. And it did for the whole rest of the meal. After finishing their dessert, Sirius and Regulus started to get up, but the doors for the room were locked.
“Mum, may we leave?” Regulus asked.
“No, we need to talk.” Walpurga responded.
The boys sat down again, shifting their chairs closer together.
“Now boys.” Orion started. “We’re aware you’re in your final years of schooling and that it can be hard to….want to wait.” Sirius practically spit his water out. Regulus’s eyes bugged out. Why the hell are our parents talking to us about this?
“And we’ve decided, obviously, you will marry a pureblood family or marry some Black your age.” Walpurga added. “But, we figure that…there isn't any harm in letting you two…experience things.”
“Holy shit.” Sirius whispered in a sing-song voice.
“But, we are aware that Sirius is far more eager to enter the dating scene.” Orion said.
“So, Sirius, you may date only once Regulus is.”
Sirius’s face turned bright red and the little color drained from Regulus’s face.
“So basically neither one of us will date?” Regulus asked. Walpurga and Orion gave each other a knowing look. There was always more than what meets the eye. Sirius could see Orion smirk a little, but it was subtle.
“May we be excused now?” Sirius asked. Walpurga went to the door, pulling out the key to unlock the doors.
“You may. Goodnight boys.”
“Night.”
“Goodnight.” Regulus responded, practically running out the door with Sirius. He slammed the door behind him and looked over to Sirius, who was still in shock.
“Holy shit they weren’t kidding.” Sirius sighed.
“Guess they weren’t.”
“I can’t believe they were serious.”
“Yep.”
They walked all the way up the stairs until Sirius spoke up. Unlike with their parents, however, silence was never awkward between the two brothers.
“Reggie?
“Yes Sirius?” Regulus asked as they walked through the hallway, where both of their rooms were located.
“Is there a chance-”
“Nope.” Regulus answered before Sirius had the chance to ask.
“Please?”
“Not at all. Dating is a waste of time and this will be a good lesson for you.” Regulus said, closing the door in Sirius’s face. Sirius groaned and left for his room. He jumped into his chair, dialing James’s number again.
He must’ve been out or was eating dinner, because Sirius was met with his voicemail.
“Hey Prongs, it's me. I need you to call me back. Okay, bye.” Sirius hung up and screamed into his pillow. He quickly got ready for bed, and went to lay in bed. “How the hell am I going to get Reggie to date anyone? He hates everybody. Well, not his friends. But I’m pretty sure Barty and Evan are in love with each other, and Reggie is so fucking gay...God this sucks ass."
Sirius had reached a dead end. He couldn't call James since he always went to bed early when he had rugby in the morning.
"Oh! Pete!" Sirius yelped, jumping out of his bed to dial Peter's phone in his room. "Please pick up Pete, pleaseeee."
No answer.
"Oh piss off Wormtail." He sighed, putting his phone down. "Guess it'll be a solo mission."
Sirius got up to his desk, and got pulled out a notebook.
"Now how am I going to gt this to work with Reggie and..." Sirius couldn't even finish the sentence without gagging. "Let's just move on from that an focus on the plan itself..."