Chapter 23
September 19th 1978
Hermione
I clutch my knees to my chest, blinking back the tears from my eyes as I stare at the small little pink cupcake in front of me, a lit candle stuck in the center.
The little elf holding it starts to frown, looking between me and the cupcake. "Wigby doesn't mean to make Mrs. Hermione sad!" The small creature exclaims, its eyes welling with tears. "Wigby just wanted to celebrate the young Miss's birthday! Thought Miss Hermione would like cupcake!"
I immediately reach over and take the elf's wrinkly hand, smiling even as a tear runs down my face. I muster up the biggest smile I can manage, even if it's a sad one. "Thank you Wigby, it's perfect." I tell the elf, rubbing circles in its hand with my thumb. "My birthday is just a very hard day for me." I explain, choosing not to unpack my burdens on the poor thing.
Uncle Severus was able to replicate the potion that he'd first given me as a child to reapply my glamor, it ended up taking all day—much to Sirius's disappointment. He'd ended up leaving right before the others came back from hogsmeade.
Iwas quick to realize why the glamour had fallen.
It was my birthday.
Uncle Severus had made the glamour to last as long as 18 years. It was supposed to fall on my eighteenth birthday. And though it technically hasn't been a year yet since my last birthday, it is my birthday, so the glamour fell early.
Sirius had insisted we celebrate when he found out but I vehemently refused. He had insisted for a moment but was quickly stopped by Remus who gave me a sympathetic smile and dragged Sirius from my room, leaving me with my godfather, James and Lily, the second two left quickly after, leaving me with Uncle Severus.
He takes me in his arms as soon as the door closes. "What happened?" He growls. I give a bitter laugh. "You know what happened. The failsafe, which you seem to have been prepared for seeing as you gave me a vial of your memories." I say accusingly.
He scoffs, brushing my hair from my face as he grumbles, "If only." In a sarcastic tone of voice. I huff. "What do you mean 'if only'? You gave me a vial of your memories, what else could it have been for?" I ask, frustrated from the days events.
He sighs, still holding me. "The bloody memories were for you, you daft girl. So you could have a piece of your parents. I had no idea about the failsafe, I was not there long enough to be linked to the castle that deeply. That's why Minerva and Dumbledore got their memories back and I didn't. They were each there long enough to be fully linked with the castle's magic, a sort of tenure if you will—bloody ridiculous if you ask me." He explains.
I let out a bitter, watery laugh. "Jokes on you, uncle Sev, without that Godric damn failsafe, I don't think I would have made it long enough to see them." I say and he slaps me upside the head. "Don't speak so crudely—just like your..." He trails off, suddenly coming to a stop as his face falls.
I frown. "Uncle Severus?" I ask quietly, hoping he would share what was on his mind. "You okay?" I ask quietly. He clears his throat. "I...It is irrelevant." He dismisses and I frown. I open my mouth to question him about it but he raises a hand, shushing me.
"There are more important things to worry about right now then my private musings, tell me what has happened since I have been...gone, it is imperative that we fully examine the situation before moving forward." He says, his voice morphing from my sarcastic but caring godfather to my stern but genius professor in only seconds.
I nod, wiping my wet cheeks and taking a deep breath to steady my nerves. "After you—" My breath hitches. "After you died," I say solemnly, crossing my arms. "We went on with the battle," I don't mention breakdown or the fact that I went into a murderous rage, killing every death eater in my path. "We fought for what seemed like forever until the dark lord called back his troops, calling them to retreat to the forbidden forest."
I take a shaky breath, not meeting his eyes as I recall the events that brought us here. "We—we had too many casualties, too many injured, too many dead. Voldemort," My voice breaks at the horrible man's name. "He said he'd give us an hour—to tend to our wounded—He gave Harry a chance to surrender to him—said that if he did, no one else would get hurt."
Snape sneers. "And let me guess, Potter decided to sacrifice himself for the 'greater good' like the gryffindor dunderhead he is?" He says, malice coating his words, making me roll my eyes. "Harry," I continue, giving my godfather a glare. "Went to the forbidden forest, hoping to kill him, the next time we saw him was an hour later, unconscious in Hagrid's arms as the death eaters celebrated his death." I explain and my godfather pinches the bridge of his nose, waving for me to continue.
"You and your father are so bloody ominous, get to the point for salazar's sake, obviously the potter boy isn't dead—much to my disappointment." He says gruffly, making me roll my eyes, suddenly remembering all the times he had told me that 'patience is a virtue.' while in his class.
I cross my arms. "If you would stop interrupting me, maybe I could get to that!" I huff. "Now, as I was saying, the death eaters were celebrating Harry's death while voldemort gave a mind numbingly boring speech about joining his ranks or dying—quite basic if you ask me—then while we were all distraught and panicked, Harry flashed up from Hagrids arms and someone—I didn't see who—passed him a wand and he was seconds away from firing a spell at the dark lord when the ground started shaking."
I take a deep breath. "Before we knew it, the world was spinning all around us and then suddenly we were here." I sigh, putting my hands on the sink, trying to avoid looking at the two scars that I bear, each one worse than the other. Severus stays quiet so I continue. "Dumbledore.." I swallow, letting my all fall shut. "He's planning something, I think I'm a part of it." I say quietly and I see him go completely rigid and suddenly he's right next to me, grabbing my chin in between his fingers and making me look him in the eye.
"You listen to me, don't do anything for that old fool! We have all sacrificed too much in our lives to give any more!" He says sternly. "There is no way to get back, you and I both know that—so does he. He is going to try to distract you and to exhaust you so he can get his way withount you noticing. We have all learned that whatever Albus Dumbledore does, he does with an ulterior motive, so don't play into it, you hear me? I don't care what potter or Weasley or any of these other buffoons do, you don't listen to a single word he says! If he is planning something I don't want you apart of it. We will not sacrifice anything else for that man, we have played his games long enough." He says, anger clear in his voice, I can't help but share the sentiment.
"What am I supposed to do, uncle Severus?" I ask, my brain finally digesting the situation that we are in. "What you've always done," He says, meeting my eyes with a sad but determined gaze.
"Survive."
I look at the small little candle, not knowing what exactly to wish for. I could wish to be returned to my time, I could wish for the dark lord to die, I could wish for many things—none of them would be what I want.
As if reading my thoughts the small elf speaks up in a small voice. "Wigby is being told that you is to wish for you's greatness desire!" She says, her eyes wide in excitement, a smile on her wrinkly face.
I nod thoughtfully, thinking over her words. I knew that already, of course, but it still makes me think. What is my greatest desire? I ask myself, fiddling with my locket. A second year version of me would have said it was to get all owls. If you had asked me in forth year, I would have said Harry living. Fifth year me....well, she just wanted her father.
Thinking it over, I find that that is the closest to the truth right now. I wish for my father. My family. My mother, my aunts and uncles, my godfather and friends, I wish for them all to be safe—and not just safe, but happy.
That is my greatest desire.
With that in mind, I close my eyes and I make a wish.
I wish for my family to be safe and happy.
James
We are all eerily quiet as we sit in the common room, not a single one of us knowing what to say. Sirius taking out another cigarette from his pack, the fifth one in the past hour. Just before he can light it, Remus reaches out and grabs in from his hand. Sirius glares.
"Give me the bloody cigarette." He growls, trying to get it back, but Remus is too fast for him, ducking back at the last minute. "Why so you can smoke yourself sick? That won't fix your problems Sirius." He says angrily, making Sirius scowl. "You don't know shit, okay Remus?" He growls, standing up, pointing a finger at him.
"That girl is my fucking family! The only part I got left, and she is in fucking pain! Pain my fucked up brother probably caused—and the only person she wants to talk to about it is fucking Snivilous!" He yells, pointing an angry finger at Remus who has clenched his jaw so tight it could break—this close to the full moon, I'm surprised it doesn't.
"Sirius sit down." I huff, massaging the headache away from my temple. He doesn't listen, continuing to yell at Remus about god knows what as my headache increases as the volume of his voice does. "Sirius." I warn, but he keeps getting louder, either nod hearing my warnings or not caring about them.
He yells, I see Lily jolt at his sheer volume and I snap, my head exploding at his loud voice. "Sirius, sit the fuck down!" I yell, slamming a glass against the wall, my voice so loud that it too hurts to hear.
Everyone goes still around me, I close my eyes, putting my head in my hands. My hands shake and I feel Lily put a hand on my shoulder.
"James?"
She whispers. I take a deep, shaky breath, trying to find my words. I swallow the lump in my throat. "She—did you see it?" I choke out. "The—the scar?" I open my eyes and Harry immediately opens his mouth to explain. "Oh, that's not hidden by the glamour, that's always there. During the war Les—" he changes direction, his eyes glancing at Sirius.
He clears his throat. "A..um, a dark witch tortured Hermione for being muggle born, left that nasty scar in her arm, Hermione came to terms with it quite a bit ago though—probably because she isn't actually a muggle born—"
I cut him off. "Not that one." Sirius clench his fists, Harry scrunches his brow. "The one on her chest? That happened in the department of mysteries—" I stop him again. "No! No, the other one, the one on her left arm!" I say in exasperation.
Harry's face falls.
"Hermione doesn't have a scar on her left arm..."
Regulus
We tread carefully as we walk back from Hogsmead, the group of us quiet for different reasons. My mind plays out the scene from earlier this morning, my brain unable to comprehend what that potion could have done to have made Severus storm out of there like the world was coming to an end and he was trying to keep up.
Narcissa, Lucius, and Andromeda probably have a similar train of thought in their minds. The others, however, I don't know. The lestrange brothers chat in quiet whispers, a solemn look on both of their faces, no doubt dealing with their own troubled family.
Bellatrix's absence weighs down on me but I choose to ignore it in favor of bigger problems. Mini Malfoy walks beside Nott Jr, Nott chatting his ear off while he walks quietly, giving a nod every once in a while, all the while Crouch does the same thing beside me.
"....Well, Black? What do you think?" I catch the end of his sentence, his obnoxious voice bringing me back to the present. I scrunch my brow and Pandora laughs, smacking his shoulder playfully. "Oh, Barty! Leave him alone, I'm sure he has more to think about than you and your schemes." She says teasingly.
Crouch scoffs. "Yeah? Like what? That secret girlfriend of his?" My back snaps straight and I whip my eyes around to meet his as everyone goes silent. He can't possibly know. The only one who knows took a sacred vow.
Crouch rolls his eyes. "Oh come on, black! It's not like it was that big of a secret! I saw her bloody bite marks when you were changing. Got yourself a feisty one, eh?" He wiggles his eye brows suggestively and a release a breath. He doesn't know.
Images of Marlene and her golden hair pop in my minds eye and I have to force myself to calm down. He doesn't know. I put a cool expression on my face and give a noncommittal shrug. "I have urges." I say simply, leaving no room for an argument.
I see narcissa make a distasteful face at my words but am quick to ignore it as conversation moves elsewhere where. "So, speaking of feisty witchs, that golden haired gryffindor—" he lets out a low whistle. "I think I might marry the witch!"
My blood goes ice cold as I try not to react. I could have sworn Marley said her parents didn't do arranged marriages. I take deep breathes through my nose as he continues. "Hell, if she wasn't a mudblood, you would see me down on one knee!"
The ice in my veins immediately melts but for some reason, I don't feel any better about the subject. Nott Jr. chuckles appreciatively. "You can say that again!" He lights one of those muggle cigarettes Sirius is obsessed with. The mini Malfoy clenches his jaw, his dislike for the girl obvious.
Bastian nods. "I see the appeal, too bad she's a mudblood, she would have made a good bride." I grimace and Narcissa glares. "Women do have more uses then to be male entertainment, Lestrange. You would think you would have realized that fact after the many times you've been beaten by one." She says in a haughty voice.
Lestrange rolls his eyes, waving her off. "Yes, yes, women are superior, blah blah blah. Not what I meant, I meant she would be a great pureblooded woman. She's Gorgeous, has the brains, the manners, the cruelty—" he looks to Narcissa. "She would be a force." He shrugs.
Narcissa thinks for a moment but seems to find the answer satisfactory and turns back to Lucius who carries her bags. "Dragon?" Mini Malfoy looks over to his mother as she beckons him forward. She takes a small bag from Lucius and plucks a small velvet box from it, handing it to Draco.
He scrunches his brow but takes the box from his mother obediently. He opens the box slowly and his eyes widen. I furrow my brow and watch intently as he pulls a small, silver bracelet from the box, his mouth slightly agape as he takes it in.
We all stare at the gorgeous bracelet, a silver chain, shining in the light with three different charms.
A silver Dragon.
A dangling emerald.
And the Malfoy crest.
Draco traces the dragon with the tip of his finger, his mouth downturned and his brow furrowed in thought as we all stare at the little bracelet. He finally looks up and we all watch with bated breath. "What is this for, Mother?" He asks quietly, his fingers still caressing the dragon.
Narcissa gives him her annoyingly mysterious gaze and brushes his hair from his face, giving him a soft smile. "For when the time comes." She says ominously, not a single one of us understands.
I meet Lucius's eyes from across the group and from the look on his eyes, I can tell we have the same thought running through our minds.
What is she planning?
Narcissa
Upon reaching Hogwarts, we each go our separate ways, having our own troubles to deal with, though I have yet to see my darling sister anywhere, instead I hap upon Severus, drowning himself in a bottle of fire whisky.
I raise a brow at my old friend, his uniform ruffled and his sleeves shoved up to his elbows, his hair a mess. "Severus." I greet, he gives a noncommittal grunt in return, making me curl my lip.
"Do speak to me like a human being, you may mumble with others but do not make it a habit to do with me my friend." I warn him, poring myself a small glass as he downs another quite impolitely. He pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration and I roll my eyes at his childlike behavior. "You are not one to act so outlandishly, tell me what troubles you."
Severus scoffs and I raise a brow.
"I never took you as one to be so childish when upset, Severus." He downs another glass before standing unceremoniously. "And when we first met, I had no idea that you would be one to constantly stick your nose where it does not belong, but alas,"
His eyes take a dark turn.
"Nothing is as it seems."
The next day
Harry
I sit on the steps to the dormitories, rubbing my eyes to stay awake. I've been waiting here since my father dropped that bomb on us. Toujour pur. those were the words carved into Hermione's skin, unbeknownst to us all. it had been hours since she left, claiming to need some air.
I check the clock, seeing that it's around 5 in the morning—so ten hours to be exact, 7 since I've been sitting here waiting for her. Dad comes down the stairs, sitting next to me on the bottom step, handing me a cup of coffee. "You sleep at all?" He asks as i take a sip of the hot bitter liquid.
I shake my head. "You?" I ask as the mug in my hands warms my cold fingers. He shakes his head. "Neither did Sirius. I—the last time I saw that look on his face was when he found out that his brother got that bloody mark—it was like...it was like he realized he couldn't save him." He stares off into the distance, a look of foreboding darkening his eyes.
He takes a deep breath. "When Sirius first got sorted, it was like—it was like those words had been seared into his mind! He used to mumble it in his sleep and wake up screaming in terror—it took him years to get those words out of his head, but—" His voice breaks.
"But hermione..." His eyes glaze over. "To have it branded on her skin as a permanent reminder, to never be able to forget it—not to mention the memory of how she received the scar." He shivers in revolution. "That's something I wouldn't wish on anyone."
I stare at the mug in my hands. "I just don't understand why she never told me—and not just this, all of it! I don't know a single real thing about what her life was like before Hogwarts—Godric, I'm even missing things about her life while she was here!" I put the hot mug down on the step, interlocking my fingers. "I just wish she would tell me what she's been through so I can help her go through the things she's dealing with now, so we can get through it together!" I explain.
My dad sighs, looking down at his feet for a moment before turning his head to look at me. "Did I ever tell you that I saw into one of Sirius's nightmares?" He asks quietly and my brows shoot up as I shake my head. He nods solemnly. "Didn't think so."
He breathes a deep sigh. "One night In our third year, Sirius was having a really bad nightmare—which he hadn't had in a while—before then, I'd never really known what his nightmares were about other then the fact that they centered around his shite family."
He continues. "I had touched his shoulder to wake him up...I've replayed that night over and over for years and if I could go back, I would tell myself to just go back to sleep." He gets this haunted look in his eyes, one I have yet to see on my playful dad. "He accidentally projected the dream into my head." He explains and I steel myself for the worst.
"That night I watched a memory of his mother torturing him to the point of unconsciousness...up until then I had been just like you. I'd wanted to know every detail, thinking it could only bring us closer but—" He clears his throat. "After that night, I realized I didn't want to know every detail, not only because I knew—I knew, that Sirius wasn't ready to share, but also because I wasn't ready to know. To know everything my best friend—my brother, had been through and not be able to do shit about it."
He clenches his jaw. "The things his family did to him..." He shakes his head as if trying to get the image out of his brain. "I was so angry, angry about what they did to him, angry about the fact that he felt like he couldn't tell me, but most of all I was angry because..." He takes a deep breath, deflating. "Because I could do anything." He meets my eyes.
"I wanted to kill and torture and maim those bastards, but I couldn't." He says angrily. "You have no idea how helpless that makes you feel, to know someone is suffering and not be able to do anything about it, to have so much—to have to much hate inside you with nowhere to go." He tears up and a frown tugs at my lips.
He wipes quickly at his eyes. "I don't want you to have to go through that, to see all that pain and not have any way to fix it—because if you're anything like me, that will eat at your heart and soul." He's right. I know because even now I want to make his sadness disappear. we sit in silence for a moment, neither of us knowing what to say. Just as I find myself opening my mouth to speak, the door opens.
We both immediately get to our feet at the sight of golden curls and honey eyes. She halts at the sight of us, letting out a small breath. I put the coffee on the table by one of the couches as I approach her. She gives me a small, sad smile as she steps toward me.
I open my arms in an embrace and she immediately returned the hug, making it so we're clutching each other tightly, her chin rested on my shoulder. "You okay?" I ask in a whisper. She shakes her head softly. "No."
"But I will be."
4141 words
Hey guys! It's been a while huh. 3 months. Sorry for the long as wait, thank you all for being so patient and giving me the time I needed. This chapter was kind of a boring one but hey, let me know what you guys think. Still looking for an artist to collab with for some fanart, if anyone is interested please reach out to me through my TikTok of the comments. Thank you all for reading and the next chapter will be out as soon as possible.