Curl Up & Die
Remus couldn’t believe it.
Actually, he could.
Actually, he couldn’t.
Actually, he could believe that this would happen, he couldn’t believe that he was stupid enough to think it wouldn’t.
And of course it was today.
Today, Tuesday, February 14th, Valentine’s Day, would be the day he asked Sirius Black to be his boyfriend. And today, Tuesday, February 14th, Valentine’s Day, would be the day that Sirius Black broke his heart and said no.
Remus slammed the door to his flat behind him.
Ironically enough, the red roses (seriously??? what was he thinking???) began to wilt in the cab ride home from the restaurant, leaving a trail of rose petals leading straight to his apartment door.
A tear trickled down his face. Slowly, like molasses, but he only tasted salt as it reached his upper lip.
He swiped the tear away, reaching deep into his worn, corduroy pocket for a cigarette. He fled to his fire escape, desperate for fresh air.
After taking a few steading breaths he lit the cigarette, taking a slow drag.
Remus chuckled to himself as he thought over the last few months with Sirius. Secret meetings, stolen kisses, he should’ve known it was too good to last. After a moment, Remus returned inside and shuffled into his cramped bedroom.
He reached into his bedside table to grab his notebook. He didn’t know where else to turn.
There was a time
When I worshipped the ground you walked on
There was a time
When I'd cut off my ear for you
There was a time
When I worshipped the towel you dried on
There was a time
When I'd kill all my friends for you
Remus dropped his pen.
“Oh god. James and Peter. The band.” He thought to himself.
Remus began pacing back and forth, back and forth, in front of his bed.
“What have I done? They’re going to hate me. I ruined everything.”
Suddenly, Remus couldn’t breathe. He realized he began crying again, this time so forcefully he shook. Slowly, Remus sank to the floor. He began to write again.
You're the only one
Makes me wanna cry
You're the only one
Makes me wanna beat up inside
You're the only one
Makes me feel alive
You're the only one
Makes me wanna go home and
Curl up and die