Chapter 2
Lily did a fantastic job putting Sirius Black in the back of her head and forgetting about him for the rest of the holidays, she was quite proud of herself because of that. But unfortunately all of this crumbled down the moment thousands of butteflies started fluttering in her stomach when she saw him again, laughing with his friends at the great hall during the welcome feast.
She loved all creatures, magical and non magical, but those butterflies Lily knew that needed to be exterminated sooner rather than later. For her own good she kept telling herself. The thing was that the whole school knew about Sirius reputation with girls and Lily didn't want to end up like one of the many girls she had seen crying in girls' bathrooms because of Sirius Black.
After some weeks she was starting to feel proud of herself again, she wasn't actually near of annihilating even one butterfly, but she was doing a great job avoiding him. That considering how much she could avoid a person who shared almost all of her classes and whose best friend followed her around constantly.
Lily couldn't stand James Potter, she had nothing against him and deep down she knew he was probably a good boy, she had came to notice how he seemed to had matured a little bit over the summer, but then again, Sirius had matured a lot too since the last year. But the main reason why Lily couldn't stand James was that every time he insisted on asking her out, she had to see Sirius's smiking at his side and she couldn't help but wish that it was the Black boy who was asking to take her on a date.
It was one stormy night when she was returning from her prefect's rounds alone because Remus was at the hospital wing again, she loved the young Lupin and was used to him being sick from time to time, but sometimes she hated having to do her rounds with no one to talk to or share chocolate. But it was that early november night when she stumbled into a soaking wet Sirius roaming around the corridors with sad and watery eyes like he had been crying.
- What are you doing Black? You can't be here - said Lily standing in front of him, trying not to stare so much at the way the lightning that came through the windows illuminated his perfect face.
- Just taking some air and thinking- Sirius shrugged nonchalantly but Lily could see the way his eyes weren't sparkling as always.
- Are you okay? - she asked unsure and jumping startled when a loud thunder made the windows' glass tremble.
- I'm not the one scared of a little storm- he chuckled avoiding her question.
- I'm not scared- she frowned at him- and you should be in your bed or at least the common room, it's past curfew.
- Humor me a little Evans, I got some hours left until my birthday it's over- he declared looking at his watch.
- Oh, why aren't you celebrating with your friends or one of your girlfriends then?- she couldn't understand how Sirius Black, the most charismatic and outgoing person she knew, was alone the night of his birthday.
- Remus is unavailable, Peter is already out snoring like a pig and James can get a little annoying when he starts talking about you- he said rolling his eyes- no offense Evans but I don't need to hear how red your hair is when I have been seeing it for six years.
Lily couldn't help but blush at his words, has he really been seeing her hair?- At least someone else understands how annoying Potter can get, have a good night- she declared and started walking back to the common room.
- Wait, that's all? Aren't you going to escort me back, take points or give me detention for being out after curfew?- he asked incredulous looking at her.
- Take it as a present- she said over her shoulder- Happy birthday Black.
- Thanks Evans- he said and Lily could hear the laughter in his voice that made her smile.
From that night on, Lily realized that killing the butterflies was going to be impossible, so she stopped avoiding him and started to slowly find ways of interact a little bit more with Sirius if the opportunity arose. Not that she was actually going to make a move on him, she knew that it was suicidal because she was Lily Evans after all, too innocent, too smart and not pretty enough to be the type of girl Sirius wanted. But at least she felt happiness everytime he talked or looked at her, something no one else could do, because she had tried to think of others boys, but no one seemed to be enough.
- Come on Lils- said Marlene Mckinnon offering her hand to Lily who was snuggled on a couch reading.
- Where?- asked the redhead confused but taking her friend's hand anyway.
- To get ready for a little party- smiled the blonde- C'mon it's friday night, you can't spend it only reading who knows what- she rolled her eyes when Lily opened her mouth to protest.
- What party?- asked Lily suspicious.
- James invited us to their dorm- Lily couldn't help but frown at this- don't give me that face, he says that it's been six years and the Gryffindor boys and girls from our year have never hanged out together, so it's time to change that, and I agree, mostly because I have nothing better to do and they probably have something to drink.
- Are you sure this isn't one of his stupid plans to ask me out again?- Lily asked unsure.
- I swear, the rest of the girls are going and Remus, Peter and Sirius will be there too- explained Marlene- I will try to keep him far from you.
- Okay- said Lily her lips curling up when she heard Sirius's name- because I swear that if Potter gets annoying I'll leave.
Moments like these where when Lily thanked Merlin, and every deity that she could think of, because no one, not even her friends noticed or even imagined that she had a crush on Sirius Black.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The gryffindor girls walked in the boys dormitory and Lily was suprised because it wasn't a completely mess like she was expecting, it was obvious that the boys have put some effort tidying it up.
- Uhmm- you can take a sit if you want, said Peter awkwardly when they just stood there staring at each other.
Lily looked around, there was a trunk used as a table with drinks and food, but there weren't enough chairs or space to sit other than the boys' beds or the floor, so she walked to the bed that had a leather jacket resting on it and sat there.praying internally that is was Sirius's bed.
Said boy made his entrance moments later, carrying a record player with his strong arms- There's no party without music- he announced placing the record player on a desk.
That evening Lily felt on heaven, she didn't spoke a lot with Sirius because he was next to James most of the time, but he gave her permission, and only to her, to see his small collection of muggle records and books. She had so many questions and was surprised to find that he shared a lot of her taste.
The moment Sirius walked past her to sit on his bed, leaning his back against the headboard, Lily felt ecstatic. The strong smell of his cologne invaded all her senses and she couldn't help but blush when she realized that, in some way, she was sharing a bed with Sirius Black. Suddenly she thought that maybe she actually did want to share a bed with him, but what made her butterflies lost all composure was when he so distractedly, started to hum a song while smoking a cigarette. Lily turned aroud slightly and looked at him in awe, he was softly mumbling the words to himself, but from what she could hear, it sounded really sweet. And she loved it.
- Bloody hell Padfoot, open a fucking window if you're going to smoke in here, will you?- said James a little annoyed, taking Lily out of her trance of staring at Sirius.
He gave her a quick look for the first time since he sat there and rolled his eyes, walking towards the window.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
- I've thinking the whole day- announced James sitting dramatically on his bed- and it's okay, you have my blessing to be with her if you want.
- Uhm what are you talking about Prongs?- asked confused Sirius looking at his best friend.
- Evans... Lily... Lily Evans- said James stuttering- you can be with her if you want, I'll not interfere.
- Why would I want to be with her?- furrowed Sirius- she's your girl.
- No, she's not- sighed James sadly- She fancies you and if she wants to be happy with you, then so be it, I'd rather lost her to you than to another wanker... I know you would take her to the moon for me- he have him a sided smile.
- I'm lost- admitted Sirius with a dumbstruck expression- Moony would you translate what Prongs is saying?- he asked looking at Remus who was reading on his bed.
- James realized last night that Lily fancies you and now he basically wants you to live his dream of dating her- said Remus not taking his eyes of the book.
- Last night?- asked Sirius to no one in particular- you mean the little gathering we had here with the girls? That's why you were in such a bad mood after?
- Yes- exclaimed James almost yelling- didn't you noticed how Lily looked at you the whole night? Or how she touched all your stuff and sat only on your bed? She even had the most beautiful smile on her face and looked at you with such admiration when you sat there, near her, smoking and mumbling that stupid song.
- Oi, it wasn't a stupid song, I don't listen to stupid music- he pointed a finger to James- and it doesn't mean anything Prongs, you're reading too much into it.
- Too much?- said James surprised of how clueless Sirius was- She's always trying to talk to you about the muggle stuff you like- he started counting with his fingers- we all have trouble with potions and still she only volunteers to help you every time, and Moony told me she always try to discreetly ask him about you on their prefect rounds, do you really think I'm making this up?
- But I've never tried anything with her James- replied Sirius troubled- I mean she's beautiful, you got to be blind not to see it, but I don't see her that way, she's forbidden- then he thought of something- could it be that she's trying to use me to make you feel jealous?
- Well, she's not longer forbidden, because she doesn't looks at me the way she looks at you- admitted James defeated- and if you think she wants to make me jealous there's only one way to know.
- That's not going to end well- warned Remus looking at them- you can't play with her feelings Padfoot.
- I'm not going to play and it will work out fine for everyone, you don't have to worry- he smiled proudly- I'm just gonna check the waters and see what the fuck it's going on, I know I'm the dream of every girl, but Evans can't be in love with me- he barked a laugh.