Opening Closed Doors(Part 1)
Hans opened his eyes, shaking his head and quickly sitting up within his bed. The boy was breathing heavily, his hand clutched over his heart as a bead of sweat trickled down his forehead.
Awakening from a sleep filled with dark dreams, Hans’s sudden stirring sent the hangings on his bed swaying. After a few moments of resting on his bed, trying to discern his thoughts and staring into the darkness, his heart began to slow.
Images from the dreams that had woken him flashed through his head, befuddling his thoughts as he tried his best to clear his mind. The things he saw in his dreams related to the events the previous day, the Boggart in particular. He remembered the sights that the dreams had brought to him. The sound of a single gunshot, ringing in his ear in a most painful manner. The image of the dying girl within the center of rubble and splintered wood. The smell of fire and smoke. The feeling of the weapon in his hands. The taste of blood in his mouth.
As he thought about that creature he ended up destroying with his ancient magic, Hans remembered the words the small girl had spoken to him, “What have you done?”
Hans shuddered, leaning forward in his bed, looking down at the comforter that covered his legs. The bedroom was silent, for the most part, minus the snores of Everett Clopton across the room. After a few moments of empty staring, considering his life, Hans twisted in his bed, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed and settling his feet on the floor.
Hans pulled the hangings that covered his bed away, looking out to the rest of the bedroom. The slightest bit of light was peeking into the room from the rising sun. Hans released a breath of relief, it wasn’t too early in the morning, he was okay to leave the common room.
As he stood up, the comforter rolling away from his body, the wood beneath his feet creaked. He froze, staring around the room and ensuring none of the other boys around the bedroom had heard him. As none of the others stirred, Hans proceeded to his wardrobe and opened it. Once more he found himself staring into the gleaming silver of his sad eyes. He remembered the cold and evil stare that his younger self gave him when the Boggart confronted him and shuddered, a shiver running down his spine.
Hans averted his gaze, looking away and deciding it best not to think about it anymore. As his hand roved the top of the bar within the wardrobe, searching for something to wear, his mind wandered to Poppy.
Just the simple thought of her was enough to comfort the boy, in only the slightest amount. He wondered where she was, and if she was still sleeping. As he thought about her, he was wondering how she was doing. Despite her insistence to reveal the darkness that Hans was hiding, to comfort him and to see everything in its fullest, Hans had not done the same for her
He couldn’t help but feel guilty for that, even though she never gave him that kind of opportunity. She was always taking his attention away from her and her problems with his own, that he found it hard to find a time to talk to Poppy about herself. It was quite frustrating, really, in Hans’s foolish mind.
The same part of him that blamed himself for the deaths of those he loved was frustrated that she was the one worrying about him, comforting him and protecting him, it was supposed to be the other way around. Sometime these thoughts, the thoughts that told him he had to protect everyone around him, including her, were hard to restrain. And that made him feel only worse about himself.
Hans grabbed his burgundy robe and a simple Ravenclaw shirt and tie with blue pants. As the boy sat down on his bed, pulling each of his clothing items onto his body and straightening them, his mind next wandered to Sebastian.
He and the Slytherin had been quite close for much of the year, but as Sebastian couldn’t down the road of the Dark Arts, they started to grow apart. It first started in their pursuit of Slytherin’s scriptorium, and the necessity’s used to get into the scriptorium before hand. Hans was quite surprised that his Slytherin friend new Crucio, but since Hans was unwilling to use it, he still told Sebastian to use Crucio on him, something that Ominis nor Sebastian were really on board with, but in the end it had to be done.
Afterword, Ominis had made Sebastian promise to not get involved with the Dark Arts again, and they believed him. Though, as time went on, it became clear the Sebastian was not keeping this promise. Hans ignored that fact, that was, until the day they had to defend Feldcroft from the attacking goblins.
When Sebastian used Imperio on the goblin to keep it from killing Hans, he watched with horror at what Sebastian made the goblin do to itself. That was when Hans realized how much Sebastian truly relied on the Dark Arts, and how far he was willing to go for Anne. The relic and the use of Avada Kedavara was only Sebastian confirming what Hans had figured.
Yet here they were, several months later, and Hans was somehow friendly with Sebastian. Hans had no honest knowledge on how and why he had managed to accept Sebastian. When he and Ominis discussed putting Sebastian in Azkaban, they decided that was something they did not need to do. Sebastian was already suffering enough, being separated from his sister. He didn’t need the dementors to enforce that either.
But the question of their friendship was still a difficult one to answer. It seemed that Sebastian had kept his promise this time around, and had truly stayed away from the Dark Arts, but what did Hans really know?
Once dressed, Hans snuck out of the bedroom, being careful to not awaken any of the others.
———
Poppy entered the Great Hall, surprised to see Natsai, Sebastian, and Ominis standing next to the Hufflepuff table, talking to each other. It was mostly Sebastian and Natsai talking, with Ominis giving an occasional remark.
As Poppy approached, Natsai waved at her, and Poppy tentatively waved back. Once Poppy was within earshot of Natsai, the Gryffindor exclaimed, “Hello, my friend!”
“Hello, Natsai,” Poppy nodded to the dark-skinned girl, smiling, before her eyes roved Sebastian and Ominis two, “Hi Ominis, Hi Sebastian.”
“Greetings,” Ominis nodded his head, his eyes drifting a bit to the side of Poppy.
“Hey, Poppy. Say, uh, have you seen Hans since Defense Agaisnt the Dark Arts yesterday?” Sebastian asked, a strange nervousness in his voice.
Poppy looked at Sebastian curiously, “Why?”
“I just-“ Sebastian looked between Poppy and Ominis, while Poppy and Natsai stared at him with confused expressions, “-he seemed pretty disturbed by the Boggart yesterday, I wanted to make sure he was okay.” While it was a convincing story, his voice faltered far more than it needed to, and that made Poppy curious.
Was Sebastian’s voice so nervous because of what the Boggart turned into, being his uncle, or was it because he was trying to rekindle his and Hans’s friendship? Poppy didn’t know the answer, and before she revealed too much to Sebastian, she decided she intended to find out, “I did.”
As the group moved toward the Hufflepuff table, as they often did nowadays, Natsai spoke, with true sincerity for Hans’s wellbeing, “Is he okay?”
Poppy didn’t answer for a moment, glancing at Sebastian who was watching her closely, “He’s- that’s not for me to say. I’m not going to talk about him behind his back, you guys can ask him yourselves.” Poppy knew that it was likely Hans wouldn’t be truthful with them, but she didn’t desire to say something she shouldn’t.
“That’s the thing,” Sebastian remarked, “we can’t. He won’t talk to us. He’ll say hi, he’ll joke, but usually he’s hiding behind you.”
Poppy looked at Sebastian with a bewildered expression, “Hiding? Behind me? Don’t be ridiculous.”
“I would have to say Sebastian’s right, Poppy,” Ominis interjected, turning his head in Poppy’s direction.
Poppy looked at Natsai, who just shrugged. The small Hufflepuff looked to the doors of the Great Hall, wishing that Hans would walk through then. She had found him outside of the Ravenclaw tower, as they arranged the night before. Hans broke away though, saying he needed to go take a bath and get cleaned up, and so they parted ways. Poppy told him she would meet him in the Great Hall.
The Hufflepuff looked between Sebastian and Ominis, “What do you mean?”
Sebastian started, “Whenever we try and talk to him, whenever we try and approach him, he runs to you. In the times when it’s just one of you, it’s always you, he just disappears when he’s not with you. The only time any of us can talk to him is when you’re around-“
Ominis cut across Sebastian, “We know it’s not your fault, mostly because you still spend time with us, and you talk to us. Frankly we’re glad you and he are courting-“ Ominis elbowed Sebastian in the side, who opened his mouth to speak, amazing that Ominis knew when his best friend was about to speak, “-because were it not for you, things would still be like how they were those first few days after Professor Fig died.”
Poppy opened and closed her mouth a few times, her brow furrowing as she realized everything the two Slytherins said was true. “So… what are you saying?”
“We want to be friends with him again. We want to talk to him. I need to talk to him,” Sebastian said.
“What do you want me to do? There’s not much I can do,” Poppy sighed, shaking her head and looking at Natsai.
“My friend, you are the only one who can do anything,” Natsai pointed out, “you’re the only one he’ll willingly be around.”
Poppy knew Natsai was right. But she didn’t want to get in the middle of this, she already felt like she was being nosy with the Boggart. “I don’t-“
“Can you give us a moment with him, ten minutes, that’s all I’m asking,” Sebastian put his hands on the table, staring at Poppy with pleading eyes.
“I-“ Poppy began, before pausing and thinking it over. She had an idea, and it would most likely work, but she still felt a little anxious with it, “yes, I can.”
Sebastian smiled, “thank you, Poppy.”
Poppy nodded, looking down at the table and frowning. She hoped that whatever Sebastian wanted to talk to Hans about wouldn’t cause problems. She hoped that she hadn’t already caused problems.
Just then, the doors to the Great Hall opened and Poppy looked up. Hans was walking toward the Hufflepuff table, his eyes for Poppy, and only her. Now that Sebastian mentioned it, she noticed Hans’s subtle mannerisms. How he would avoid the eyes of every other student in the room except for her, how he would walk quickly, and how he had his hands stuffed in the pockets of his robes, gripping his wand tightly.
Hans sat down next to Poppy, putting an arm around her and hugging her to his side. Poppy smiled as he whispered to her, “Darling.”
Hans let go of Poppy, putting his hands on the table, gathering a plate of food as he avoided the gaze of other’s. Sebastian was looking right at Hans, “Hey, Hans.”
Hans didn’t look up from his plate, instead still focusing on it as he answered Sebastian rather stiffly(Poppy noticed it this time), “Sebastian.”
The table exchanged glances as Hans had his head down, each person communicating with their eyes that this was exactly what Sebastian was talking about. Everybody looked at Poppy, who decided that it was the best time to act.
After giving Sebastian a meaningful look, Poppy set the spoon she was holding down, it’s too resting in her half-eaten porridge. “I have to go to the restroom, I’ll be back in a little.”
Hans looked up from his plate with reproachful eyes, looking at Poppy with a frown as she stood. Poppy smiled at Hans, patting his shoulder as she departed from the table.