Laughter Lines

September 2nd, 1971

Remus’ first classes at Hogwarts were not what he had planned for. 

 At breakfast the next day, Professor McGonagall had handed out their timetables. The first-year Gryffindors had Astronomy and Herbology in the morning, followed by lunch and then Charms. 

 Maybe it was the constant reminder of the moon, but Remus didn’t enjoy Astronomy that much. The first thing they learned was the moon’s phases, which Remus certainly hated. His excitement about Hogwarts dwindled during Astronomy, and Remus filled out his moon cycle chart as quickly as he could. 

What if this lesson helped reveal his condition? He’d have to leave Hogwarts; Remus was sure of it. It did not help that both Peter and Sirius seemed to know quite a lot about Astronomy already. What if they figure out where he goes this weekend? He didn’t want to think about it. 
 
They had Herbology with the Hufflepuffs, and it brought back Remus’ excitement for school. 

“Now, we will be starting with the most common and least dangerous plants.” Professor Sprout told them. “One of the most important magical plants for you to know is dittany. Who can tell me some of the uses of dittany?” 

About half of the class raised their hand, including Remus. “Yes, Mr. Lupin.”

“It can help prevent scarring and heal certain wounds,” Remus said.

“Excellent.” Professor Sprout smiled at him. “One point to Gryffindor. Who can name some other uses? Yes, Ms. Jones.”

Megan Jones, a girl with brown hair in two high buns, answered, “A mixture of silver and dittany can heal a werewolf bite.” 

“Correct. One point for Hufflepuff. Now, I’d like to clarify your wording, Ms. Jones. Nothing can heal a werewolf bite. When bitten, the victim will always become a werewolf. However, applying a mixture of silver and dittany can seal the wound so the victim does not bleed out.” Professor Sprout said. 

Remus wondered if every class at Hogwarts was so dependent on lycanthropy. 

Professor Sprout had assigned them an essay on dittany and its uses, due the next time they had class. After lunch, the first-year Gryfindors headed to Charms. Charms, thankfully, did not have any mention of werewolves at all. Professor Flitwick, who was very short, taught them the levitation charm. 

When left to practice the charm on their own, many struggled. Marlene's kept flipping over, and Peter’s would not move at all. Remus got his to levitate briefly, but it fell after 5 seconds. Sirius and James had gotten it on their third try and used their wands to direct the feather into each other’s faces. It was only Lily Evans who got it on her first try.

“Excellent, Ms. Evans!” Professor Flitwick exclaimed, smiling at her. “Two points to Gryffindor!” Lily seemed very pleased and turned to help Mary. Dorcas had given up on trying to levitate it, and instead, she and Marlene were taking turns balancing the feather on the tip of their wands, both giggling madly. 

“Ms. Meadowes and Ms. McKinnon! Please resume actual practice!”

At the end of class, Dorcas and Remus himself were the only people apart from Sirius, James, and Lily who had gotten the feather to levitate for more than a couple of seconds. Charms was the last class of the day, and they all headed back to the common room.

“I’m rubbish; I couldn’t get the charm at all!” Peter said as he and Remus sat by the window. He had been continuing to practice the charm but without luck. Remus had been working on his herbology essay as James and Sirius played a game of gobstones.

Sirius looked up at them. “Relax, Peter, it’s the first day. Plenty of other people didn’t do it.” 
 
“Most people did,” Peter said. He attempted the charm again, but still no luck. Remus saw what was wrong; he was dropping his entire arm instead of flicking it. 

“You’re doing the flick part wrong. It’s just your wrist flicking, not your entire arm.” Remus explained. 

Peter tried it again. The feather lifted briefly but then fell again. 

“You need to be more confident with it,” said James. “Here, watch this,” He pointed his wand at Remus’ ink bottle, “Wingardium Leviosa!” James directed the ink bottle over Sirius’ head. He let it drop, and the bottle shattered and got ink all over Sirius. James and Peter collapsed in laughter, and so did Sirius and Remus, though slightly less. 

“You git!” Sirius shouted. He wiped some of the ink off onto James’ face. “In the name of Merlin’s saggy ti-”

“Are you serious?” Frank Longbottom had entered the Common Room and was standing over the four boys. 

“He is; the rest of us aren’t,” James said, pointing at Sirius. They all laughed, including Frank, even though he tried to hide it. 

“It’s admirable that you’re practicing levitation charms, but please do so without spilling ink everywhere?” He pointed his wand at Sirius and James. “Tersus sursum.” The ink vanished. “Oh, and please, practice your puns, James,” Frank said, and he joined Alice Fortescue in front of the fire. 

September 3rd, 1971

 Remus tried to eat breakfast but could not handle more than a few bites of toast. The full moon was on Sunday. At least they only had Potions with the Slytherins in the morning and the rest of the day off. It would be an easy day, and then Remus could get some rest.

 Remus couldn’t have been more wrong. 

 Potions was a disaster. Remus knew Gryffindor and Slytherin had a long-time rivalry, but he did not realize it was as intense as it was. Perhaps, it was caused partly by Sirius’ sorting. Unlike Remus, James, and Peter, Sirius had not talked about his family much, if at all. He had only mentioned a few details:

1. He had a younger brother named Regulus.
2. He had three older cousins
3. He broke his family's tradition by being sorted into Gryffindor, not Slytherin. 

Remus had noticed the many stunned faces during the Sorting Ceremony but had not anticipated such an angry response. Remus saw, in particular, Adam Avery, Wilbert Wikes, Alecto Carrow, Holly Selwyn, and Severus Snape glaring and making hushed comments at him. Remus, whose senses were heightened slightly due to his lycanthropy and upcoming moon, heard ‘blood-traitor’ more than once. A few Slytherins, such as Evan Rosier, Celeste Greengrass, and Lucinda Talkalot, did not seem to care as much.

 “They’re jealous,” James had muttered, so only the four boys could hear it, “that they get the slimy dungeons, and you get the tallest tower.”

 Professor Slughorn, the Potions Master, put them into pairs. Lily Evans had asked him to pair her with Severus Snape, and while Slughorn seemed surprised, he allowed it despite the whispers that followed. Remus was paired with James, and Sirius was paired with Peter. 

 “Now, please open your textbooks to page 21 and follow the instructions for a Cure for Boils potion. Work with your partners, and read the instructions clearly.” Slughorn emphasized his last sentence. 

 James and Remus opened their books. “Shouldn’t be too difficult,” James said confidently.

 It was, in fact, quite difficult. 

 James and Remus did well at first, though Remus needed James’ help at times. However, the rapid smoke filling the classroom was causing issues. James’ glasses kept fogging up, making it increasingly difficult for him to read the pages. The smell of the brewing potions was not helping Remus’ stomach, and he was becoming increasingly nauseous. 

 Sirius and Peter seemed to be doing okay, and Marlene and Mary had minor difficulty heating their cauldron but were doing okay otherwise. Remus became even more nauseous as he added the horn slugs. 

 There was a sudden puff of yellow smoke, Holly Selwyn and Alecto Carrow appeared to have made a mistake, and their potion had turned orange instead of blue and was emitting a horrible-smelling yellow smoke. Remus gagged.

 “Okay,” said James, who had not noticed Remus’ gag. He removed his cauldron from the fire. “Now we need two porcupine quills. Remus, could you hand them over?” James looked over as Remus gagged again. “Remus?” James said, concerned. “Remus, are you alright? You look a little green, mate.”

 Remus tried to say he was fine, and the smell was just getting to him, but he gagged again. He was desperately trying to prevent his breakfast from coming back up.
 
 “You didn’t eat much this morning, is that it?” James asked, and his face grew increasingly worried. He looked around frantically, his eyes lying on some spare cauldrons. James ran quite fast over to grab one but was not fast enough. 

 Remus had turned over and retched all over Sirius’ robes. There were many cries of disgust throughout the class, and some Slytherins laughed.

 “Well, that’s pleasant,” Sirius said with a grimace.

 “Oh my, Mr. Lupin!” Slughorn exclaimed, making his way over to them. “Mr. Potter put that cauldron down and take Mr. Lupin to the Hospital Wing!” Professor Slughorn pointed his wand at Sirius, and the vomit vanished. “You ought to change Mr. Black; it doesn’t erase the smell.”

 “C’mon, Remus,” James said. He put his arm around Remus, who was leaning on him for support. Luckily, there were not many stairs to climb, as the Hospital Wing was on the first floor. 

 Once they got to the Hospital Wing, Madame Pomfrey, the school’s matron, was fretting over him. She vanished the remaining vomit from his face and gave him a clean set of light blue robes. James and Madame Pomfrey emerged from behind the curtains when Remus finished changing. Madame Pomfrey handed him a red potion.

 “Drink this, dear; it’ll help your stomach.” Remus drank it, and quite a bit of the nausea went away. “Come get me if you feel any worse.” She left Remus and James alone. 

 “Should’ve had more than a bit of toast this morning, mate,” James said with a small chuckle.

 “I told you, I couldn’t stomach more than that.” 

 “You probably just have a bug,” James said dismissively and smiled. “Hey, thanks for getting it on Sirius and not me!” 

 Remus tried to smile, but it came out as more of a grimace. He felt horrible for vomiting on Sirius to begin with, combined with the fact that all of the Slytherins witnessed it…..Remus didn’t think he or Sirius would hear the end of it for the rest of the year, and Sirius was already being taunted for breaking his family’s tradition…..

 Sirius suddenly emerged from the Curtains. Sirius’ hair was wet. “Hey, Remus, try and aim for Snivellus next time?” They all laughed, though Remus somewhat guilty. 

 “I’m sorry, Sirius,” Remus said. He hoped Sirius was not mad at him, though Sirius didn’t seem mad at all. He seemed casual about everything; he just had that air about him. 

 “It’s okay, Remus,” Sirius said. “Hey, at least we had an unforgettable first Potions class!” 

 “For the wrong reasons,” Remus added. “I don’t think we’ll hear the end of it from the Slytherins now.”

 “Nah, probably not. But they can take their own vomit and shove it up their arse.” Sirius said, and they all laughed. 

 There was a rustle in the curtains as Peter joined them. “Professor Slughorn told me to tell you we have an essay on Forgetfulness Potions next week.”

 “Oh, thank Merlin! I’ll brew one next week and forget that class.” Remus exclaimed. All four laughed.

 “Are you okay, Remus?” Peter asked. “You haven’t vomited again, have you?”

 “No, I’m fine. I think it’s just some sort of stomach bug.” Remus’ shrugged.

Madame Pomfrey returned and ushered Sirius, Peter, and James out. Once she was sure they were out of earshot, she directed her attention back towards Remus. 

“Does this happen to have anything to do with the upcoming moon, Mr. Lupin?” She asked softly.

“Yeah, typically, I get a bit nauseous leading up to it,” Remus explained. “It’s never been that bad.” 

“Interesting.” Madam Pomfrey muttered. “I hope I’m not coming across as too heartless, Mr. Lupin, but you’re the first lycanthrope I’ve ever treated. There’s not many books to go off of, I’m afraid.”

“It’s fine,” said Remus. “My dad didn’t know much at first either; he’s the one who helps after the moons; my Mum’s a muggle. He typically uses silver and dittany afterward.”

“I’ll write to him to try and figure out the best ways to help your symptoms.” Madam Pomfrey said. “In the meantime, you still need to eat something, Mr. Lupin. Something light, so you don’t upset your stomach.” 

Madam Pomfrey brought him some soup and returned to her office. Remus was awfully bored; he wished he had a book, his guitar, or even the company of James, Sirius, or Peter. Even if it was another horrid Quidditch lecture from James. 

September 5th, 1971

 Remus remained in the Hospital Wing for the rest of the day and remained there for the weekend. James, Sirius, and Peter had visited him frequently, occasionally bringing chocolate they had taken from dessert. However, most of what they brought sat wrapped on the table next to the bed, as he was too ill to eat anything but soup and porridge. 

 On the night of the full moon, Remus was led to the Whomping Willow by Madam Pomfrey, who assured him that she would be in the shack the moment the sun rose. Remus followed the long, slightly uneven passageway to a set of stairs. The stairs led to a small shack, which included a small foyer and a bigger room off to the right. There was minimal furniture, just a chair in the foyer and what Remus thought was an overly grand four-poster bed.

 Remus took off his robes and sat on the bed. He felt quite awkward, but he could not afford to ruin more of his robes during the transformation. So he sat and waited, anxiety building.

 He felt the familiar jolt in his stomach and braced himself. Remus closed his eyes, trying his best not to scream as the overwhelming anxiety turned into overwhelming pain. When his mind began to leave, Remus gave way, and the wolf took over.

 Remus woke back with a gasp. He was lying next to the bed, and his shoulder was throbbing. He vaguely noticed blood coming from somewhere; he thought it was his arm. Remus crawled onto the bed and under the covers and waited for Madam Pomfrey.