Chapter 1
"How could you hate someone so much, but still love them so deeply?" those words, harry repeated to himself everyday. everyday since he had walked out of the chamber of secrets, with his newly gained knowledge, of who tom was. he remembered now, as he laid back on his cold bed, all of the moments he and tom shared before it had gone so, so, wrong...he remembered how he had found the diary laying beside his other books. the shock he had felt, the emotions,...he remembered when he had first talked to tom. "a talking diary?!" he had been utterly confused. how could the diary respond? was he alive?.. he had thought, for a few moments, that tom loved him. he regretted it now, feeling sick in his stomach guilt flowing through him. "Voldemort..." he thought. "Im in love with Voldemort..." the thought wouldnt leave harry alone. it felt like thousands of curses being thrown at him, millions of spears poking at him, and yet...it warmed his whole body. he couldnt decide if he liked the thought or not. but he did feel betrayed. how could he have been so foolish? to think Tom loved him back? did he..? was all of what tom had told him, everything he had said, the feelings he made him feel, all sick manipulation? harry didnt know. but deep down in his heart he wished it wasnt. oh how he hated this! what was he gonna do now?! he was in LOVE with TOM RIDDLE!.. but Tom had tried to kill him. and Harry knew that. if Tom really loved him, he wouldnt have done it...right?..
Maybe it was an attempt at hiding his feelings, maybe he hated him, maybe it was a test?.. whatever it was, it wasnt good. oh no, of course it wasnt good. it was everything but good. but still, harry felt that he had found himself staring at the boy in the chamber, even after he found out who he was.
but maybe the worst part of all, was that harry had lost. he hadnt died ofcourse, but he couldnt do it. HE COULDNT BRING HIMSELF TO KILL TOM RIDDLE. he had failed. Ginny was dead. Voldemort was back. but he had survived...Tom hadnt killed harry however...Harry had been surprised to wake up alive. at first he thought he was dead. that this was hell, or maybe heaven. but when he woke up the boy was gone. and ginny was no longer breathing. he had tried, he really had, but something in him had told him to not. and he hadnt. he tried to stab the book but it mustve triggered something in him because instead of his arm sticking the basilisk tooth into the diary, he fell uncounscious. it didnt matter much to question why though. not at the moment. he had other things to think about. he had carried ginnys body to madame pomfrey but ginny was dead. there was nothing left in her. she, was dead. gone, off somewhere else. Harry explained to ron how he had tried but didnt go into detail about what had happened. careful what information to give others and what to not. Ginnys whole family had come to her funeral, along with harry. and the school had sent everyone home for an early summer break. not being able to risk another death. the thing though, is that ginnys body isnt the only thing harry had brought back from the chamber of secrets. he also, took with him, the diary. more specifically, tom riddles diary. he had kept it close to him while walking out pf the chamber. once at his dorm, he kept it locked away. now however, that it was "early summer break" at the dursleys he was starting to not being able to resist anymore. could there be a chance the diary still worked?.. curiousity got the best of him.
harry got up from his laying position. he looked out the window. it was dark outside. perfect. he knew it was risky, but he had planned on trying to get back some other of his belongings anyways, so what harm could getting the diary too do? the plan was simple, really. attempt to sneak out of the bedroom and sneak down the stairs, open the cupboard with one of aunt petunias hair pins she had lost and harry had found, take out some pf his stuff and sneak back up. okay, maybe it wasnt that simple. but he had to try. he couldnt just go the whole summer without completing any of the schoolwork they were supposed to be doing! school work he would be studying for at hogwarts had he not...forget about that, harry had a plan and he was gonna fufill it! he grabbed the hair pin and walked over to the door, careful not to make a sound. he stuck it into the doorknobs hole. two times he turned it. then "click" and he was out. he walked down the stairs slowly, trying not to be heard. he now stood infront of the cupboard. hands sweating, deep breaths coming from him. this was it. he unlocked the cupboard and grabbed some of his belongings. he had done it. he noticed the diary and stared at it. "should he..?" harry grabbed the diary and shut the cupboard door. making sure to lock it. then he sneaked back upstairs and locked the door in his bedroom. phew! harry was relieved that everything had gone smoothly. he wondered what awaited him for tomorrow as he stared down at the diary. little did he know, a black sillhouette was watching from afar.