Overstimulated
Autumn - Third Years
Sirius
As much as he absolutely hated anything starting with “aca” and ending with “-demic” Sirius Black could not WAIT for school to start again. He twiddled with his sleek obsidian wand as he sat on a bench next to his less handsome and talented sibling Regulus. His little brother scratched his nose and re-tied his shoes three times as they waited for the train to arrive.
Kings Cross Station was full of witches and wizards flocking together and apart like bees doing mating dances. Sirius closed his eyes and relaxed into the clamor and chatter, exhaling and pulling his red and gold scarf further up his face.
Grimmauld Place was always dead quiet. And it was hardly home. Not compared to Hogwarts or the Potter's house. Anyone in the Black family who had not “proven themselves” by whatever improvised standard his mother came up with was to be “neither seen nor heard.” So of course Siruis made it his mission to be seen and heard as much as possible.
His mother was too much of a menopaused wench to have more kids and there was too much of a trend of untimely deaths and “accidents” in the Black family for his mother to risk only having one heir to fall back on. Regulus and Sirius were both acutely aware that they were each others spares.
The boys knew that they were somewhat indispensable, and that kept them from being too injured at home. They were never marred enough to be visible to the public and most of it was just mind games anyway. Sirius secretly wore private bruises and minor hexes like badges of honor. Call it what you will, but there were worse ways to cope.
And if his evil family hated him, then he must be doing something right. Right?
“SIRIUS!”
Sirius got a face full of ash-blonde hair as a boy tackled him from behind and knocked him off of the bench. Peter was on top of him before he could say fizzing whizzbees and they automatically wrestled as per formal tradition. Regulus wrinkled his nose, picked up his child-sized briefcase, and went to sit on a different bench.
“Peter! Your ugly mug is a sight for sore eyes! I missed-"
Both boys practically had the wind knocked out of them as James joined the dog pile.
“JAMES!” They exclaimed in unison.
Witches and Wizards taller and older than them skirted around the roughhousing in disdain. Sirius blew a kiss to one particularly cranky-looking witch, making her clutch her pearls and turn away scoffing.
Sirius brushed his bangs aside and looked up to find Remus standing above them with that fond expression he always got when the three of them were having fun.
“REMUS!!!” They all screamed. The boys had gotten to stay at the Potter’s summer home for a whole month, but Remus hadn’t been able to come. It wasn't the same without someone to keep them from getting black eyes every two seconds. They quickly scrambled up and hugged him.
He was beaming, practically glowing at seeing them all again, at all the hugs, but Sirius could tell that something was off.
Remus’ attention seemed to flit from one thing to another even as he responded with enthusiasm to their summer tales as they waited for the train.
“I gotta take a big shite.” Peter randomly proclaimed as he walked calmly towards the station bathrooms. “Me too,” James followed him before briefly turning and walking backward. “Not a shite though, I’m not gross like that.” He gave them a little smirk and walked away.
Sirius looked back at Remus, joke loaded in his mouth and ready to go, but Remus was staring off into the distance with his eyebrows all scrunched. He hadn’t even noticed that half their group had left.
There were dark circles under his eyes that Siruis noticed now that he could get a good look at him. He seemed thinner than when they had left school. Which was fine, but he didn’t really have enough meat on him to begin with.
“Did you not sleep last night or something?” Sirius asked.
Remus turned toward him and blinked. “Sleep?” he repeated, like he had only picked out that one word.
“Did you sleep last night? You look tired.”
Remus scoffed jokingly. “Thanks.”
“No, I didn’t mean it in a bad way. Just…” he trailed off, not sure where he had planned to go with that sentence.
“Why didn’t you hang out with us this Summer?” The question slipped from Sirius as he thought it. Remus looked at him more focused now, his arms drew in slightly and he seemed…ashamed?
Sometimes Sirus wished he could stuff words back into his stupid mouth.
“I told you, my mother’s been really ill and she didn’t want me to leave her.”
“I thought you said she had gotten better.” Sirius watched as his friend absentmindedly picked up a piece of rubbish and tossed it into a nearby bin.
“She got bad again.” He said quietly.
“Bad again?” Sirius echoed. Remus was usually more eloquent. And better at lying.
“Yeah.”
If Sirius thrived in crowds, Remus seemed to shrink in them. It had never been this bad when they were at school before though.
Remus flinched at every person who bumped or brushed past like they were threats. He seemed disoriented (which was a James thing, not a Remus thing) and randomly got startled by things Sirus couldn’t find the source of. Something sober and too mature for his age settled in the pit of his stomach.
“You alright mate?” He lowered his voice.
Remus turned aside, pinching his nose and squinting his eyes shut.
“Hello? Remus?” He took a step closer. “Remus!”
“Huh?” Remus whipped around to him. His mouth was partly open, and his shoulders practically tensed up to his ears.
“What’s wrong?” James materialized at the sound of distress. Sirius gave him a meaningful look involving lots of eyebrows to get him up to speed on Remus’ stranger-than-normal weirdness, also drawing the attention of Peter as he trotted over.
Remus looked around, scrunching up his nose as if smelling rancid milk.
James eyed their friend's fidgety hands and shot Sirius a concerned look. Remus was scratching his own palms a little too hard for Siruis’ liking. Had he developed the habit over summer break? Something’s obviously happened since they last saw him.
“There’s a lot of people here.” Remus finally stated. As if that explained anything.
Peter scratched his head and looked around at the black robes flitting in and out of the dusty sun. “I mean yeah. It’s a train station.”
“It wasn’t this loud last year.” Remus squinted his eyes off at something in the distance.
All Sirius could focus on were the palms Remus was hurting with his nails.
He grabbed them.
Remus snapped immediately out of whatever funk he was in. He stared at the pale jeweled hand covering his freckled one in surprise.
Sirius quickly slid his hand off Remus' and gripped his more socially acceptable forearm, leading him towards the approaching train so they could get away from the crowd. James got the gist and he and Peter followed.
That was weird. Why the hell did Sirius just do that? You don’t touch another guy’s hand like that.
SCREEEEE
The Hogwarts Express came sliding into the station, fluffy clouds pumping from its exhaust like an idyllic cartoon.
Remus yanked his arm away and covered both ears, shutting his eyes.
The other three shot each other's looks, they had gotten so close in the past two years that they could practically read sentences off of each other’s expressions.
Peter: It’s not that loud.
Sirius: I know, something’s wrong.
James nodded his chin towards the braking train.
James: Let’s get him on.
Sirius let Peter guide their friend this time, using his shorter frame to dip in and out of the pegs of people lining the edge of the platform while dragging a visibly distressed Remus behind him. Sirius watched them enter the train and wiped his hand against his leg.
Stop acting weird around him Sirius, he can take care of himself without you grabbing his hands like that.
***