The Right Place And Time
True to her word, Mary was round for breakfast the next few days, and before Remus knew it, he was back at work. He hadn't appreciated how much money he had been saving now rent and mortgage wasn’t a worry, as when Sirius took him to replace his sim for a new one with a new number that Fenrir couldn’t reach, he realised he had more than enough in the bank for a brand new phone, and so he bought himself one. It was the first new phone he had ever had- all his old ones had been second hand, the best that Gran could afford, and he was sad to see his old, battered, cracked handset go, but the new phone felt sentimentally representative of the new life he was building in Bristol, the one he wasn’t trying resist anymore, intent that refusing to fully put his roots down in Bristol meant that his old life- Gran included, alive and well- was still waiting for him in Aberdeen. There was nothing for him in Aberdeen but painful memories and grey buildings. He was not going back.
Bristol was home, now. The pub was home. Mary, Peter, and Dorcas were home.
Sirius was home.
Remus was home, now.
*
“Hey.” Sirius sounded like he was trying to be casual on the phone when Remus answered, mid-way through his shift. He was instantly suspicious.
“Alright, Sirius. What's up?”
“Oh, not much, not much.” something was definitely up. “Just, I think Reg is finally ready to look after Harry on his own now, and Harry is just so excited at the prospect of a sleepover with uncle Reggie, without silly old padfoot getting in the way…”
“Aye.” Remus could see where this was going.
“Well, given that I’ve been kicked out by my own son, I thought maybe I could stay at yours?”
Remus grinned, even though Sirius couldn’t see it.
“Aye, alright. If you’ve been kicked out and you’ve nowhere else to go.” Remus tried to keep the smile from being evident in his voice, but he’s not sure he succeeded.
“I’ll pick you up when your shift ends, then, love.” Sirius replied, and Remus’ grin stretched even wider. He wasn’t sure he’d ever tire of hearing Sirius call him that. As cliche as it was, every time he heard it a swarm of butterflies spawned in his stomach, turning his knees weak.
“Alright, pet. I’lll see you later.”
*
True to his word, Sirius was leaning against the pub wall, waiting for Remus. He was back in his high waisted flares that drove Remus wild, paired with his leather jacket, hanging open over a fred perry polo shirt. He immediately held his hand out for Remus to hold, and the two of them fell into a comfortable silence as they walked home, clasped hands swinging between them. Remus could tell Sirius was working up to something, and could guess what it was, so he was happy to give Sirius the space he needed, instead admiring the way Spring was beginning to creep into Bristol, the early blooms and the increased vibrancy of the colours, the fresh green leaves brightening up the ever-grey sky.
Sirius still hadn’t said much beyond inquiring about Remus’ shift by the time they reached Remus’ house, but he determinedly pulled Remus by the hand up to the bedroom, dragging Remus up the stairs before sitting determinedly on the bed.
“If you wanted to go slower, that’d be fine. But I just- I feel ready, you know? To take this further. I want to.” Sirius was avoiding eye contact as he often did when he was nervous, and his cheeks were already flushed dark pink. Remus sat next to him on the bed and gathered him into his side.
“I’m ready for whatever you’re ready for, okay? I’ve been following your pace, and I will continue tae.”
Sirius grabbed Remus’ face and pulled him into a fierce kiss that ended with them lying down on the bed, Sirius on his back and Remus on top, knees either side of Sirius’ narrow hips.
“Does that answer your question?” Sirius said cheekily, his customary arrogance returning. Remus nodded before clambering off.
“Where are you going?”
“This would be your first time, aye?” Remus asked as he turned off the main light and turned on the fairy lights he had strung up around his room.
“...yeah, if we, um- did more than we’ve done already.” Sirius sounded nervous.
“Aye, and I want to make it nice for you. That means lighting and music.” Remus responded lightly, fiddling with his speaker and phone until Hozier’s devastating voice filled the space, just quiet enough to be unobtrusive.
“You’re secretly such a romantic.” Sirius accused, and Remus turned to him. The yellow lights cast him golden like a renaissance painting.
“You look devastating.” he did. He looked celestial. Remus climbed back on top, yanking off his t-shirt before leaning down to take Sirius’ off too. He didn’t miss the way Sirius eyes dipped to his chest and lingered. He tried to convince himself it was desire, not disgust that darkened Sirius’ piercing eyes. Once Sirius was free of his top, he reach up, dragging Remus down on top of him and just holding him, burying his face in the smooth juncture between remus’ shoulder and neck. Remus floundered. He had never been held, during sex. Maybe a little bit after, if Fenrir had been particularly in a good mood, or one of his hook ups had been particularly virginal or needy and hadn’t understood the strict rule of no touching outside of explicit sexual acts.
But this was neither Fenrir nor a one night stand. This was Sirius. This was Love.
Remus melted into it, feeling the warmth of Sirius all around him, revelling in the novelty being skin to skin, breathing Sirius in. he turned his head and started kissing up and down Sirius’ neck, using tongue and teeth to set Sirius on edge. In response, or maybe retaliation, Sirius started scraping his nails down Remus’ back, causing gooseflesh to erupt all over Remus’ body, causing his nerves to ignite. Sirius then turned his head, surprising Remus with his lips, and then they were kissing, making out sloppily like teenagers. Remus loved it. He had never had this sort of sexual experience; relaxed, safe, loving. He felt no pressure to perform, and merely let himself feel, giving in to the sensations.
After a few minutes, he felt Sirius grind up against his thigh and decided to take action. He knelt up, indulging in the sight of Sirius splayed beneath him, hair mussed and collar bones littered with little purple hickeys that stood out so starkly against his pale skin. He undid Sirius’ trousers and pulled them off, alongside his socks and underwear, leaving Sirus pale and panting and naked against Remus’ sheets. It was an incredible sight. Remus thought he might die from the overwhelm.
“What do you want, pet?” he asked, running reverent hands up and down Sirius torso, playing with nipples and tracing tattoos.
“I want to fuck properly, please.” Sirius panted out, cheeks pinkening at the confession, even though they both knew it was coming. Remus nodded, hands going to his own belt buckle.
“I will say, after Fenrir- I don’t, that's not to say I’ll never but right now- I don’t bottom. If you don’t want to either that's fine, there’s so much else we can do.” Remus said, climbing off the bed, both to get his trousers off and also as a way to brace himself for the rejection he was still half expecting.
“Remus, please fuck me. I- I want to be fucked. I always have.” Sirius whined, grabby hands reaching for Remus where he stood at the side of the bed. Overcome with desire, Remus stumbled in his haste to climb back on the bed. He fumbled in his bedside table, extracting a nearly-new bottle of lube he had bought in preparation for the return of the physical aspect of their relationship, and condoms he had bought back in Aberdeen which he was desperately hoping weren’t expired.
“Okay, pet. What have you done before?” Remus asked, covering Sirius’ body with his own, and pulling the duvet up over both of them, trapping the heat in.
“Enough, Remus, Please-” Sirius’ wanton pleas made Remus groan and he felt like he was about to explode if he didn’t get to touch- but he couldn’t touch without ensuring where they were at, first.
“Sirius, baby, I need you to tell me what you’ve done, aye?” he kissed Sirius again, before sitting back on the bed, waiting as Sirius eyed him.
“I’ve uh- never done anything like this with another person. I’ve fingered myself before, and I uh- I douched before I came here.”
“You what?” Remus couldn’t believe it. Sirius’ actions were awfully brazen for someone who struggled to say the words outright.
“I’m sorry?” Sirius looked nervous again, and that wouldn’t do. Remus launched himself at Sirius, kissing him deeply.
“That's-” kiss. “So,” kiss. “Fucking,” kiss. “Hot.”
Sirius giggled, wrapping his arms around Remus’ neck and hanging on for dear life.
“Is that enough for you?” he asked, looking up at Remus through his lashes in that way of his that turned Remus on to the point of pain.
“Aye, more than.” Remus let his hands wonder, grabbing and squeezing Sirius’ arse, palming his dick, running his fingers down his thighs and up his chest until Sirius was overwhelmed with touch. Then Remus grabbed the lube and shuffled down the bed.
“How many fingers do you use when you’re alone?” Remus asked, before sucking a hickey on Sirius’ hip bone.
“Two? Maybe?” Sirius pants out, reaching down to run his hands through Remus’ curls as Remus runs his tongue up and down Sirius’ inner thighs.
“Aye, okay. You’re going to need a bit more than that, and it might hurt. Just tell me if you want tae stop or need a break, aye?” Remus asked, before squeezing lube out onto his hand and licking up the underside of Sirius’ dick as he spread the lube all over his fingers. Sirius had become incoherent as Remus kept licking- his dick, his hips, his thighs. His goal was to try and distract Sirius from the pain that would likely come with fingering, and he hoped he was doing a good enough job of it as he gently slid his middle finger in, keeping it still to let Sirius adjust as he swallowed Sirius’ dick, trying his best to multitask but feeling a little too overwhelmed to do both jobs well.
He soon managed two fingers, then three, and was steadily pumping them in and out of Sirius as he sucked, trying to ignore the growing pressure of his own want, the way his dick ached with lack of attention, begging to be touched.
“Remus, Remus- ah!” was all the warning Remus got before Sirius came in his mouth, which was so hot Remus had to close his eyes and breathe deeply through his nose or he would have been in danger of coming untouched. He pulled off and out and crawled back up the bed, gathering Sirius’ cum-pliant body into his arms and showering him with kisses.
“You’re so beautiful, that was perfect, you were so good to me.” Remus whispered over and over again as Sirius slowly came out the other side of his orgasm-induced haze.
“We can stop there, if you’d like. It doesn’t feel as good after you’ve come.” Remus whispered, running soothing hands up and down Sirius’ back.
“Hmm-mm. I still want you, Remus. Please.”
And who was Remus to say no to that? He knew it might be more comfortable if Sirius got on his knees but he wanted- needed- to be facing Sirius. Needed to see that beautiful face.
“Alright, pet. If you give me one of your legs? Thats it, perfect. You’re so good. You’re doing so well.” Remus knelt above Sirius, taking one leg and draping it over the crook of his elbow to give him better access. He delighted in the way Sirius squirmed at the praise, and resolved to explore that more in the future.
“Alright, baby? Are you ready?” Remus asked, lining himself up, and kissing Sirius fiercely when he nodded, pushing in ever so slowly. Sirius’ breath caught and his eyes screwed up and Remus paused, letting him breathe through the discomfort, ready to pull out if that’s what Sirius wanted.
But then Sirius’ face was relaxing and smoothing out and he was wrapping his arms around Remus’ back and pulling Remus closer, encouraging him further in and eventually Remus bottomed out and started up a slow and gentle pace, pulling out about half way before sliding back in with a practised roll of his hips. Sirius was making little mewling noises that were driving Remus crazy, his eyes closed, face tilted up to the ceiling, giving Remus perfect access to his neck.
Remus reached down between them and was pleasantly surprised to find that Sirius was already fully hard again. Remus stroked him, trying to time it with his thrusts but unable to do it very well, his sex addled brain not the best at co-ordination. Remus sped up the pace a little bit, going a bit harder, watching the way Sirius’ face changed with the sensations, his moans getting louder. As abruptly as the first time, Sirius came again with a shout of Remus’ name, and Remus kissed him through it, slowing to a stop before pulling out. He quickly wanked himself off and came on Sirius’ thigh, before flopping down next to Sirius and pulling the blissed out boy into his arms, where they lay in the afterglow, trading soft kisses and whispering sweet nothings to each other until all their senses returned properly.
“Smoke?” Remus asked, already clambering out of the bed and pottering about the room, opening his window and grabbing a packet of straights- he was still working his way through Mary’s gift- and a lighter, before going over and leaning out of the open window. He placed a cig in his mouth and beckoned for Sirius to join him.
The two of them stood next to each other, still as naked as the day they were born, smoking a cig each. Remus looked over at Sirius, watching his profile framed against the night sky. Only a few stars were visible, but they haloed Sirius’ face and hair in such a way that made him look like an angel.
Remus took a breath. He nudged Sirius gently with his elbow and exhaled all the smoke in his lungs.
“I love you.”
Sirius gaped at him for a second, cig dangling from his elegant fingers.
“Oh, thank god.” he exhaled, eyes fluttering shut.
“You what?”
“I’ve wanted to tell you I love you for weeks but I was scared I was moving too fast or I’d scare you off, or something. I was scared I wasn’t actually what you want.”
Sirius bit his lip.
“You’re all I want, pet.” Remus’ voice was so soft it was barely heard over the music.
“I love you, Remus.” Sirius breathed into the space between them, occupied by stars and cigarette smoke and the promise of a bright and beautiful future.