Chapter 1
On September 1st, 1971 Regulus Black woke up from a fretful sleep. He had dreamed about the unavoidable event that was his brother leaving for Hogwarts, about how lonely he was going to be and how cruel his mother could be.
He looked out the window and knew he couldn’t get out of bed for another few hours, since it was still dark. Regulus had at a very young age learned that getting up before his mother wasn’t something that she appreciated, and since he knew he wouldn’t fall asleep again he’d just have to lie there until Kreacher came to wake him up.
There was always the option of going to Sirius’ room, but that would be risky, if he in any way alerted his parents he knew he’d be punished, or more likely Sirius would find a way to take the blame.
Just when he decided to go to Sirius, the door opened slowly, as to not make any noise and Sirius slipped in quickly before closing it again. When he turned around to face Regulus bed he seemed a little shocked to see Regulus looking back at him.
They were silent for a moment before Sirius spoke up.
“I couldn’t sleep and figured it would be better to go here than to just rot in my bed.”
“Oh, so you came to rot in mine?” Regulus asked in a playful tone.
”Well, not if you’re going to be rude about it,” he answered in an equally playful voice.
”I’m sorry, I was just about to go to your room anyway.”
“Oh yeah? Have you been awake for long?”
“No, I just woke up a few minutes ago,” and then when Sirius gave him a questioning look, he added “I just had another nightmare, no big deal.”
Sirius hummed in acknowledgment and walked across the room to sit on the bed. Regulus scooted closer to the wall and Sirius lied down next to him.
They didn’t say anything for a while, it was comfortable in a way that it never was around other people, there was never any judgement between the two of them. Other people usually made him feel inadequate and useless, like if he did anything wrong he would never have the luxury to be noticed again.
Regulus was almost certain that Sirius had fallen asleep when he asked the question, “are you nervous about going away?”
He hadn’t expected an answer, so he was a little surprised when Sirius murmured a quiet “not really.”
”No?”
”No, ‘m just a little bummed about leaving you here, that’s all,” he said in a sleepy voice.
”You don’t have to worry about me, I’ll be fine.” Regulus knew it was a lie, but he didn’t want to think about what would happen while Sirius was gone.
Sirius sighed and looked over at Regulus with that look that slightly perturbed expression that only he could muster, but he thankfully didn’t push.
”What was your nightmare about then?”
”Nothing,” he answered a bit too quickly.
”We both know that’s not true.”
Regulus paused for a moment before muttering a low “I don’t want you to worry.”
”I’ll worry either way so you might as well tell me the truth,” was the answer he got.
”It… it was just,” he paused for a moment, before he continued “you left and forgot all about me.”
”You know I won’t ever forget about you, right?” Sirius looked so sad, which didn’t make sense because Sirius never looked sad. He looked happy, he looked mischievous, sometimes he even looked angry, but never in all of Regulus ten years on this earth had he seen Sirius look sad.
”Promise?” Regulus asked, looking hopeful.
“I swear it, on my life.”
……………………………………………………
Sirius had left about an hour later so that they wouldn’t be caught by their mother.
When he heard Kreacher scuffle through the hallway outside his room he quickly pretended to be asleep as he heard him knocking on Sirius door before walking across the hallway to knock on his own.
He muttered a quick answer before getting up to get dressed.
As soon as he was done he stepped out of his room to go downstairs. He made sure to be as quiet as possible, since his parents didn’t like it when he was loud. When he was at the bottom of the stairs he heard loud footsteps from the floor above. Sirius had never listened much to their parents.
Sirius reached the dining room right after Regulus, only to receive a scathing look from their mother.
”I thought I told you not to clamp down the stairs,” she spoke in cold voice.
”I’m sorry, maman,” Sirius said with his head held down. She only gave him a disapproving gaze as she continued sipping her morning tea.
The two boys sat down and waited for their father to give them a sign to dig in. When he didn’t say anything for a minute, Regulus looked up to see him reading an article in the Daily Prophet.
He placed the paper next to him on the table when he was done and looked up at Sirius with the same distant expression as usual before turning to his wife with a questioning look. She nodded and they both turned back to Sirius before Orion spoke “Do you have any idea of what was written in that paper?”
Sirius looked confused but decided to play a safe card, “Something about politics, maybe?” Almost every time their father spoke to them it was about politics.
”Yes, but can you be a bit more specific?” Their father looked expectantly at his oldest son.
Regulus thought that it was completely unfair to ask anyone that, especially since he just got there and there was no way he would know what the article was about. But Sirius had always been smart and he answered with a nonchalant voice.
”I’ll just assume it’s about muggles.”
Their mother gave him a disgusted look, as if she had half a mind to scold him over the tone of voice he had used, but Orion just nodded and seemed to think about what to say for a minute. Ultimately he decided on “You know you can’t make friends with any of the muggleborn students while at hogwarts, not that there should be any in Slytherin, but you should stay away from them, the bloodtraitors as well. Especially the Potter boy.”
Sirius nodded, even though he didn’t seem very happy about it. They both knew this already, they had been told about how horrible muggles were from a young age, and while Sirius never seemed to really believe it, Regulus had a hard time not believing it. He knew that they were bad, even if didn’t quite know why, his parents had lived longer and knew a lot more than Sirius, so of course they were right.
Orion seemed content with that and nodded while shifting his gaze to Regulus for the first time that morning.
”You can eat now.”
……………………………………………………
A few hours later and the family stood gathered on platform nine and three quarters.
The whole family was there to show a united front to the other families, since they had a high profile in the wizarding world.
Regulus watched as wizards and witches, some who he knew and some that he didn’t looked at him and Sirius with approval in their eyes. Wherever they went in the wizarding world there was bound to be at least one comment on how well behaved they were. Regulus never understood this, how could they be well behaved if they got punished all the time?
As they waited their aunt and uncle came over with their cousins. While the adults greeted each other, the two teenagers looked at each other and then gave the young boys a hug each. Andromeda and Narcissa were the two younger of the black sisters, with only a one year age difference while Bellatrix was three years older than Andromeda. Bellatrix was nowhere to be seen though, which wasn’t really unexpected considering that she graduated two years earlier. It was still slightly disappointing since she was Regulus favorite cousin.
Andromeda and Sirius started talking immediately while Regulus felt a little left out and he looked over at Narcissa, who was already looking at him with a sad smile on her lips.
”Are you anxious about Sirius going?” She asked in that kind way she only talked to her baby cousins.
He considered lying but knew it would be to no avail. “Yes, but only a little?”
“Only a little, huh?” She looked at him a little funny. “You know, I was scared to death when both Bella and Andy had to go, but then, before I knew it, it was my turn and now everything is fine.”
He gave her a blank stare before she continued “I mean, I know that you’re probably scared of being alone and I get that, but Sirius will write to you, I know he will. You have nothing to worry about and then next year when it’s your turn, you’ll be able to talk to him every day.”
“I know, it’s just so scary, I’ll be all alone with no one to talk too.” He stated in slight distress.
”Yes, but it’s only for a year then he’ll be back.”
He only hummed slightly, he planned to respond but the icy voice of his mother interrupted him.
”Sirius! Stop doing that, you’re embarrassing us!”
Regulus looked over and saw Sirius in a silly pose with his hands over his head and his knees slightly bent. He quickly corrected his posture while Walburga started scolding him.
Regulus turned to the two sisters who were now talking in low voices with each other before they turned to him and said their goodbyes as they went to meet up with their friends.
Walburga stopped scolding Sirius after a minute or two, before she started to nag him on how to behave at school and his brother’s expression quickly turned to a bored one. Suddenly he looked like he was holding back laughter while looking at something, Regulus looked in the same direction and saw a boy with sandy hair and scars all over his face in one of the train windows, he was pulling a face at Sirius.
Their mother’s rant ended and she bent over slightly and said a low “go on kiss your mother goodbye.”
It was almost menacing and there was a glint of cruel satisfaction as Sirius quickly pecked her cheek, clearly looking humiliated. As soon as he turned her back to her he grimaced and it was Regulus turn to hold back laughter.
“I’ll see you at Christmas, right?” Asked Regulus.
”Of course, I wouldn’t miss that for anything in the world.”
He nodded in response before saying “I’ll miss you.”
”I’ll miss you too.” He smiled brightly before the horn of the train blared loudly.
Sirius hugged him tightly before releasing him to turn toward the train, right before stepping in he turned around and shouted a quick goodbye before getting on.
After a few minutes he could see Sirius waving at him out of the same window that the boy from earlier had sat in.
As the train rolled away he remembered Narcissas words from earlier, remembered how she said everything would be fine.
If only she knew how wrong she had been.