Those Startling Green Eyes
“Bambi?” A sweet angelic voice called over.
Harry was startled to hear that someone else was there with him in the room. Surprised and a bit anxious that he didn’t hear someone approach him. Whipping out his wand he turned around, ready to curse at whoever was behind him.
“Bambi, what’s wrong? What are you doing here?” The voice called out again.
Harry was startled to find green eyes that seemed to glow in the dark. Even turning around to see if the mirror was still behind him, making sure he wasn’t looking at his own reflection.
“Harry?” She called again.
Hearing her say his name made his head hurt, his scar pulsing, the sound of her voice echoing inside his head over and over again. He felt as if his body was turning inside out, his head being pried open as the searing pain seemed to double its effect.
“Look at him, Lil’s.” A manly voice said, voice as soft as it could be to not startle the newborn awake. “Look at our little bambi, so small and cute. He’s our’s.” The voice added, sounding with awe, love was felt in every word that he said while looking at his son.
“Our little Harry…” A tired voice followed. The woman with striking red hair leaned over the baby to kiss his forehead, wet chuckles leaving her as the child scrunched up his face, annoyed at being disturbed.
The searing pain stopped as he felt himself hit the floor, trying to calm himself as the world spun around him.
The lady in front of him looked at him with worried eyes, vivid green scanning him over as if looking for wounds or anything wrong she may find. Harry was still a bit dazed and looked at her with a lost expression.
Where did that come from? Was that his mum and dad? Was the baby supposed to be him? Hundreds of questions popped up in his head, none of them he could answer.
“Harry, my little bambi, what’s wrong? Are you hurt anywhere?” She asked again. Gentle hands coming up and caressing his face.
Harry wanted to move away from the woman, his face doing its best to try and avoid her soft looking hands. He flinches upon the skin contact, not used to touches that never hurt.
Harry closes his eyes, waiting with baited breath for the pain to hit him as soon as the palm lands. Yet his eyes slowly opened up when he felt the warm hands wiping his cheeks. A warm and loving feeling he wanted to cling onto.
“What’s wrong, bambi? Why are you here? You're supposed to be at Hogwarts waiting for the train to go home.”
Harry refuses to answer. Scared that if he opens his mouth, the strange woman would realise he’s not her bambi. Scared that the warm feeling spreading from his heart would go away.
“Harry?” She asks again. Her avada green eyes staring at his, seemingly reading through his soul.
He panics, trying to close off his mind, afraid that she would also be able to go look at his thoughts. He sees her open her mouth again but it closes as they both hear the sound of the door opening and someone talking.
“What’s taking so long, Lily? Pads is already bouncing off the walls. I swear sometimes I feel like he’s Harry’s father more than me.” The voice says in a joking manner, voice slowly getting louder as he nears the door.
“I don’t think we'll be able to do the party, James, Harry’s already here.” She replies at the man before turning to Harry and giving him a warm and loving smile.
“What do you mean he’s already here? The train wouldn’t have even left the station?” The voice asked, confused. James was it? He watches as a messy haired head peaks through the door, the man's eyes growing wide as he stares at him.
“Bambi?” He says, voice loud enough for the other people to hear. “How’d you get here so fast? Did you apparate? My bambi’s strong enough to apparate already!” He says, bounding up to him and hoists him up, giving him a tight hug before spinning him around.
“Did I hear someone say Bambi?” a voice shouts from outside. A hauntingly familiar voice.
After being set down by the strange man, he runs towards where he heard his voice–Sirius’ voice. As he gets to the door he hits a hard body making him fall butt first to the floor.
He doesn’t even register the pain he was feeling after falling, nor how his chest hurt from the impact. His eyes trailing up to what, or rather who, hit him.
Harry feels his breathing stop as he glances up to see a very tall, carelessly handsome looking man, face framed by his long, jet black wavy hair, black eyes filled with mischievousness and wonder. He lets out a shaky breath as he scrambles to get a hold of him, to be able to feel him.
To make sure he wasn’t a wisp of smoke that would be pulled away from him forever.
“Woah! Careful there, Bambi, might ruin the suit.” He jokes as he hugs Harry just as tight as he always did whenever they saw each other. But this hug was different. Sirius felt stronger, fuller in places he wasn’t. He wasn’t skin and bones anymore. He was healthy…and happy.
“We thought you would get here later! We aren’t even finished setting up for your welcome home party! Way to ruin a perfectly good surprise, Bambi!” Sirius jokes as he pulls away from the hug. His laugh filled Harry's ears.
Bellatrix seemingly comes out of nowhere, flashing him that crazed smile before looking towards Sirius, raising her wand and aiming at him. Harry feels himself running towards where Sirius was, voice caught in his throat as he tries to scream at him, to warn him that Bellatrix is there.
“ Avada Kedavra!” Green light flashed before him, making him freeze up as he looked at where he last saw Bellatrix standing.
He heard Sirius release a shaky breath before he was laughing, looking at Harry, and smiling, as if telling him that it was alright, that everything would be fine.
He wants to move, he wants to run towards him, beg him to not go, beg him to not leave him too. He feels his legs moving but he knew it was far too late. Sirius was smiling as he saw him fall over the veil, as he saw his body slowly turning into wisps of smoke.
He tried to reach him to pull him back. He can’t lose him, he can’t handle watching another death.
He feels Remus’ arms caging him, pulling him away from where Sirius is.
“NO! NO! LET ME GO! SIRIUS! SIRIUS COME BACK, COME BACK DON’T LEAVE ME! LET ME GO, REMUS! HE’S RIGHT THERE! HE NEEDS ME! I HAVE TO SAVE HIM!, LET ME GO!”
“Harry, you can’t, we can’t.” Remus’ broken voice whispers in his ear. He feels Remus hug him tighter, thwarting any attempt of escape he has from his grip. He feels Remus shaking like a leaf against him. “You can’t go too. He’s gone, Harry. There’s no more saving him.”
“I’m sorry. He says to him as he lets out sobs of all the pain and sorrow he felt. He clings on to Sirius’ leather jacket, clutching it like a life-line. “I didn’t mean to go! I didn’t want it to be true, I thought I was preventing what I saw!” He manages to say in between his sobs.
Sirius and the other two people shared a worrying look, eyes communicating, all of them nodding as an agreement was reached. Sirius scooped Harry in his arms, shushing him every time the poor child looked like he couldn’t breathe because of the tears.
“It’s okay, Bambi, it's just a party. Why don't you drink a calming draught and we can get you to your room so you can rest.” Sirius says and he waits until he feels Harry nod.
Harry felt a vial gently placed in his lips so he tilted his head back, willing to take whatever Sirius would give him.
He soon feels himself slowly getting tired, eyes slowly falling shut as his breathing evens out. He hears a faint voice calling him before the darkness finally takes him away.
“Do you think he’s alright?” Lily asks James. “I saw him crying earlier, heard him saying sorry over and over.'' Her hand finds its way to the bird's nest that is her son's hair. She combs through it with her bare hands, smiling slightly at how he reaches out, seeking for her touch even in his sleep.
“Don’t think so.” Sirius says. Eyes looking intently at Harry. “I was joking with him just like usual, teasing him for ruining the surprise again like last year when he just started crying out of nowhere. I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone cry like that before, not even when Dad died.”
"Are you sure we should compare Harry to the Blacks? Not really the most loving people in the world, are they?" James says, scowling at Sirius when he recieved a mild stinging hex.
“Well that just makes me worry more.” Lily replied. Eyes going back to her son’s face. She traces the facial structure of her Bambi, hands brushing over every single detail, memorising every bump and curve.
Silence filled the room as they all watched Harry’s chest rise and fall, listening to the occasional grunt he releases as if he was having a nightmare. Lily tries to wipe her son’s tears, even asking some cream from Chovey to put on Harry’s eyes so it would puff up and hurt when he wakes up.
“Do you think something happened at Hogwarts?” James asks Sirius, wand out and is ready to avenge whoever made his son cry. Sirius shrugs but his eyes glimmer, promising painful revenge to whoever made their little Bambi feel like that.
Lily just rolls her eyes at their antics, choosing to focus on Harry who finally stopped crying. She leans forward to press a kiss on his forehead just like she always does ever since he was born.
“Come on, let's give Harry some space and let him rest.” She pulls James and Sirius out of the room, closing Harry’s door and asking Chovey to tell her when he wakes up. She also cast a monitoring charm just in case Harry has a nightmare and needs someone to wake him.
She hears Sirius and James still planning for world abomination, watching amused as they put their Auror skills to work. She only puts a stop to it when the both of them make a move to floo to Hogwarts and question every single person, portrait, even creature! Seriously, how she puts up with their antics, she would never know.
Harry wakes up with his back hurting more than ever. It hasn’t hurt like this since he stopped sleeping everyday in his cupboard. He remembers about the strange man and woman and Sirius, hugging him and joking about ruining a surprise party.
He sits up, his back popping like an old man in his seventies, and looks around, hoping to see any sign of them. He looks around to see the same room he entered and he realises he fell asleep beside the mirror.
He feels stupid for thinking it was real, that Sirius was alive.
Harry stares long and hard at his fingers, opening and closing them as he remembers how real Sirius felt. How warm and comforting the strange lady’s touch was. How familiar and strange he felt whenever they touched him, like there was fire slowly spreading out of his body, producing warmth he never felt before.
He doesn’t know how long he fell asleep for or what the real time was. Was it really night time already? Casting a quick tempus, he panics as he sees that the train would have left five hours ago. Vernon would be waiting at the station for him, and he would never be there!
Fixing his glasses and making sure his trunk and Hedwig’s cage was still safe in his pocket, he stands up ready to leave. Casting a bombarda at the door, knocking it off its hinges. He was ready to leave, walking at a very brisk pace his body could handle without him tiring too much, when he felt something compelling him to come back to the room, like a force he can’t say no to.
Looking around to make sure no one is compelling him to lock him in the room again and seeing no one, he hesitantly goes back in front of the mirror. It seems to thrive when he goes near it, the magic it's releasing feels like a symphony that soothes his skin and mind.
“Do you want me to stay?” He asks the mirror. Feeling stupid when nothing changes. He was hoping a face would show up just like from the cartoon he watched when Mrs. Figg was watching him. “Do you want me to take you?” He asks again, hoping he wasn’t losing his mind.
When the mirror seemed to vibrate Harry took a step back, startled as its shaking slowly turned violent before it slowly started shrinking. His eyes were wide as he watched the giant mirror slowly shrink small enough that he would be able to place it in his trunk.
Resizing his trunk, he carries the way-too-heavy mirror and places it inside his trunk, casting a quick cushioning spell around it to make sure it doesn’t shatter while he’s travelling. After resizing his trunk and making sure all his things are in his pockets for one last time, he exits the Room of Requirement and makes his way to the Great Hall, hoping someone was there to help him get back to Kings Cross in time before Vernon gets mad and punishes him for being late.
Rounding his way, he bumps into the only other person he doesn’t want to see today, Snape.
“There you are, you insolent boy!” Snape calls out. Harry wants to flinch, scream at Snape to stop calling him boy, but he doesn’t and he just shuts up. Looking at Snape defiantly, hoping it can hide the fear he knows that's there.
“Do you have any idea how many people have been looking for you?” He asks, tone switching from anger to disgust real quick. “Did you think yourself too mighty for others that you refused to go out in time? The train is still at the station, waiting for you. Students have been delayed from going home to their parents because you decided you want to play God and make us wait.”
Harry winces, not liking how scary Snape looks as he slowly advances towards him. Everytime he takes a step back, Snape strides forward, seeming to get closer and inching towards his face.
“Do you have anything to say for yourself, Mr. Potter?” Snape asks him. His voice is so stern and deep it makes his skin crawl with fear. Added with how his face looks with his lips forming a snarl and his eyes darkening as if he’s slowly turning him into potion ingredients in his mind. “Leave. And this time, make sure you go and ride the train. You’ve brought as much inconvenience as it is.”
Harry doesn’t wait another second as he runs to where he knows the carriages are placed. He doesn’t bother greeting the Thestrals like Luna thought him to do. He just enters the empty carriage and cries.
‘You’re a burden, boy! Be grateful that we even took you!’
It was stupid to cry because of Snape! Furiously wiping his eyes, he presses on them hard, maybe harder than you're supposed to, a weak attempt to stop his tears from falling. He’s not weak! He can’t be weak anymore!
The last time he was weak, Sirius died.
The rest of the ride to the train was a bit sombre. It may be because it’s actually the first time he had some time to himself without someone hounding on his case, micromanaging his life.
No Dursleys that would criticise every move he makes. No ministry, no Umbridge wearing those bright pink robes that could rival Dumbledore’s fashion choice that would breathe down his neck and give out detentions. No Hermione that gets on his case, everytime he does something she doesn’t approve of.
It's just him, alone.
When he got to the train, he immediately put on his cloak, not wanting people looking at him. He doesn’t need anymore attraction to his name.
He makes a point to avoid the compartments where Ron and Hermione are. He doesn’t want to be anywhere near them. The words that were said earlier acted like a dagger, stuck somewhere in his heart, and seeing them makes him bleed out even more.
He walks around and sighs in relief when he sees an empty compartment. Getting inside, he immediately casts a privacy charm and notice-me-not praying that nobody would disturb the few moments of peace he has.
The whole train was spent on gathering his thoughts about what happened this year. When the trolley came, instead of ordering chocolate, he just asked for some pumpkin juice and a sandwich.
As he tries to stomach the last of his sandwich he sees Luna standing outside the compartment. She has that dreamy look she always has, a small smile on her face as she quietly taps on the door. He tries to ignore her, wanting to be alone, but he caves in because-well it’s luna.
“I see I’ve interrupted you again, Harry. The clouds are covering your eyes.” She says as she sits down in front of him. Harry just stares at her. Luna has always been able to know just what is happening to him.
“Have you seen the wrackspurts, Harry? I felt a lot of them zooming around here. I thought I’d make them go away.” She says, her voice soft as ever.
“No wrackspurts I’m afraid.” He replies. “Maybe they’re hiding from me too. If you see them, can you make them go away forever?”
“No one can make wrackspurts go away forever, silly.” Luna says as if she wants to laugh at him just for the suggestion. She then pulls something out of her pockets, a small container that looks like it's filled with ribbons of different colors.
“Do you know how to plait hair, Harry?” She asks as she sits besides him and hands over the small tube. “They say playing with hair really makes all the wrackspurts go away.”
Harry hums as he thinks about it. He cards through her soft hair, carefully removing any knots he finds before going through it again.
“Daddy is going away for the summer, he says he’s looking for something purple and fluffy.” Harry just listens as Luna talks about the different discoveries they made throughout the years and how she’s allowed to write about them in the quibbler.
“Neville’s going to visit a month before school starts, when daddy gets back. Neville wants to plant crying babies in the garden to stop the pixies.” She says with a dreamy sound to her voice. Harry smiles at that.
It wasn’t the usual voice Luna has, that far-off sound as if she’s never really there with them. It’s a voice that sounds like it's full of admiration and love for whoever she is talking about. Maybe Luna is dreaming of her prince charming right now and the thought just makes Harry smile more.
“Neville is planting mandrakes then?” He confirms and laughs when Luna nods giving him a look. “You should be careful when saying Neville wants to plant crying babies in your garden, they might mistake it for something else.”
Luna turns around and gives him a cold hard stare before turning around and getting into a comfortable position again.
“They say I’m Loony you know," Her voice barely above a whisper. "Everyone at Hogwarts even call me Loony Lovegood now, but with you I’m just...Luna.” Luna laughs out loud and Harry is surprised. It's the first time he ever heard her laugh. “Continue please.”
He nods as he continues twisting the ribbons in her hair before continuing to plait them “We could always be Loony’s together.” He kids, but when he sees how Luna's eyes gloss over he panics, cringing at the thought of calling her crazy. He was about to say sorry when Luna smiles and nods at him with a determined look in her face. "Harry Loony and Luna Loony." She says, her voice too silent, testing the names. "We're the Loony's now." Well it won’t hurt to be called Loony as well. Merlin knows it's not the worst nickname he got.
A moment of silence passes by them before Luna hands over a copy of the daily prophet. He sees himself at the front of the paper with Dumbledore and behind them was the ministry after the battle between Dumbledore and Voldemort.
HE-WHO-MUST-NOT-BE-NAMED RETURNS
19, June, 1996
"He's back."
— Cornelius Fudge
In a brief statement Friday night, Minister for Magic Cornelius Fudge confirmed that He-Who-Must-Not-Be Named has returned to this country and is active once more. "It is with great regret that I must confirm that the wizard styling himself Lord - well, you know who I mean - is alive and among us again," said Fudge, looking tired and flustered as he addressed reporters. "It is with almost equal regret that we report the mass revolt of the Dementors of Azkaban, who have shown themselves averse to continuing in the Ministry's employ. We believe that the dementors are currently taking direction from Lord - Thingy. We urge the magical population to remain vigilant. The Ministry is currently publishing guides to elementary home and personal defence that will be delivered free to all wizarding homes within the coming month."
The Minister's statement was met with dismay and alarm from the wizarding community, which as recently as last Wednesday was receiving Ministry assurances that there was "no truth whatsoever in these persistent rumours that You-Know-Who is operating amongst us once more." Details of the events that led to the Ministry turnaround are still hazy, though it is believed that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and a select band of followers (known as Death Eaters) gained entry to the Ministry of Magic itself on Thursday evening. Albus Dumbledore, newly reinstated headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, reinstated member of the International Confederation of Wizards and reinstated Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot, was unavailable for comment last night. He has insisted for a year that You-Know-Who was not dead, as was widely hoped and believed, but recruiting followers once more for a fresh attempt to seize power. Meanwhile the Boy Who Lived -
He stops reading at that point. He couldn’t bear one more word from the prophet slandering his name. And his name is Harry Potter! He’s not just the Boy Who Lived!
He tries to take slow deep breaths to calm himself down but it utterly fails and he just feels himself hyperventilating. His breathing harder as he watches how the paper proceeds to catch on fire.
His head hurts even more as he looks back and realises that he was alone. Utterly alone.
He was a minor but no one, not Dumbledore, not Lupin, not Sirius even when he was alive, tried to clear his name and stop the Prophet from slandering him.
He was fifteen when the ministry, the lords and ladies of different houses, when the entire lot of them thought he was a liar, that he deserved to be banished from the wizarding world.
He was a kid, and nobody bothered to believe him, to protect him!
Black swirls appear in his vision again but it fades away as quick as it came and he sees Luna with her hands up in the air. He frowns as he tries to see what she was doing but he feels it first. Her hands on his hair playing with it.
“Wrackspurts don’t like ribbons, the silver ones mostly.” She sees her get a green ribbon and she ties it around his pinky. “Now you’ll see green wherever you go!” Her smile fades as she stares at his eyes. She seems to be searching for something, face inching closer to his until they were only a few centimetres apart. “Don’t look at the mirrors Harry, they can blind you sometimes.”
Harry feels like he should look into what Luna said but he just nods. Too tired to actually think about anything else.
“Loony’s live in chess rooks. Daddy says we should all stick together. You should.” He manages to nod at Luna before she smiles and leaves for the door. Probably to go find Neville or more wrackspurts. “I like the way your eyes shine, Harry, they’re very you.”