The seer

The morning sun woke me up before my alarm did. I became conscious of its warm rays on my skin and I tried to bury my face under my covers. I wasn’t ready to wake up yet. My body wasn’t ready to wake up yet. My muscles were stiff and protested loudly when I tried to roll over and my eyes shot open. I felt disoriented and I couldn’t understand why I felt so funny.

The sun hit my eyes and squinted them and tried to blink away the pain. I sat up and leaned on my arm. Slowly, my sight adjusted to the room around me and the memories started to come. I remembered the vision and the panic from last night. I remembered passing out after Severus looked through my mind. But I didn’t remember anything after that.

I looked around me and noticed that I was in my bed. He must have levitated me here after I passed out on the sofa. I felt a little embarrassed about the fact that I had passed out. It wasn’t so common for me to pass out anymore. I had done it more often when I was starting my studies in divination. It happened to other see’ers too. But as I learned more and advanced in my studies, the instances got fewer and I learned to avoid them.

I pulled my cover off and stretched my aching arms. My clothes were the same from yesterday, Blue jeans and a knit sweater. A shiver went through me and I shook it off. Time to get up. I have work in two hours.

After a couple of moments my clothes were in the laundry bin and I stepped into the bathtub. I touched the tab and let warm water cascade over me. It didn’t feel hot enough so I turned the heat up and enjoyed the fiery stream of water. It took away the stiffness and the remaining cold from my bones.

I started to hum and reached over to the shampoo to wash my hair. It was tangled and I spent a great deal combing through the long strands and bathing them in conditioner.
The humming was a way for me to calm myself. I wasn’t ready to face what had happened yesterday and I distracted myself by taking care of my appearance. My body was still stressed and anxious and I kept humming to relieve the feelings building inside of me.

I would need to go to the Ministry soon and see all the havoc that the attack yesterday had caused. I couldn’t break down now when I needed to get ready for it. I would need to be strong and face all the emotions and fears after the ordeal was dealt with.

I stepped onto the soft carpet and dried myself. I needed to be strong. Strong for all of our sakes.

“Accio bathrobe,” I cast and a silky robe flew to my hand.

I tossed the towel on the hanger and wrapped the cool violet fabric on around me. I closed my eyes and fiddled my toes against the soft carpet. At times like these, I hated how sensitive I was. My heart always had the final say in things and it was hard for me to push my emotions aside.

My family had always encouraged me to feel all of my emotions and never to suppress them. I had been an adventurous child with a lot of opinions. My parents had guided me the best they could and I was grateful for it. And as I grew older, I had to be in touch with my inner self constantly. Being a seer was sometimes very demanding. I wouldn’t want to block any energies inside of me. And that’s why I had a hard time staying logical under a lot of pressure.

I opened my eyes and walked to the mirror. With a quick glance in it, I had to conclude that even some make-up couldn’t cover how tired I was looking. I shook my head and made a few touch-ups to hide the dark circles under my eyes.

After brushing my teeth, I closed the bathroom cabinet and took another look in the mirror. I was looking better now with some of the color back on my cheeks. My wet hair hung limply down to my back and I decided to let it dry on its own.

With a couple of steps, I left the bathroom. As I closed the door after me, I noticed a familiar aura in my apartment. What was Severus doing in here so early in the morning? And why didn’t the wards tell me he arrived?

I entered the living room and saw him sitting on the cozy armchair which was next to the cold fireplace. I saw that he had a book in hand, one which I could recognize.

“Is this going to become a habit – you reading my books?” I greeted him from the entrance.

Severus glanced up. “You have an interesting taste in literature, miss Koski”, his eyes seemed to linger on the silken robe I was wearing before going back to the book. His lips were twitching as he enjoyed the romance novel in his hands. He was holding back a sly smile.

I felt a blush creeping up my neck and I crossed my arms defensively. I felt conflicted. A part of me wanted to smack that smirk off his face and the other part was excited that he was here, in my living room after a likely stressful night.

“I just couldn’t help but notice the well-read book on the shelf. It seems like you even marked all the best parts”, he continued teasing.

The part which wanted to smack him was slowly winning. I straightened up from the wall and walked to the couch and sat on it. The leather felt cool against my bare calves and I crossed my legs slowly. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing me get all flustered up.

“You can borrow it”, I said. Severus looked up again. “If you like what you read.”

He snapped the book shut. “I have better things to do with my time than read fantasy”, he answered. Then he put the book on the table next to the two empty cups from last night.

I swallowed. “How was the meeting?”

The smirk disappeared from Severus’s face and he lost some of his casual mood. His hawk eyes were now surveying me with some amount of concentration.

“The order has decided to install nightly patrol duties in the Department of Mysteries. There will be a rotating schedule of two weeks with a member each night. You’re in it as well”, Severus explained. “Kingsley is in charge of the patrols and is overseeing the legal matters of this task. He will be explaining this at the next meeting."

My head was spinning. “What about Broderick?”

“Bode has been sent to St Mungo’s hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries. He suffered a severe spell damage to his head and as I understood it – he now believes he is a teapot.”

A breath hitched in my throat. This fate was too cruel for him. Too cruel for anyone. I hoped with all my heart, they could somehow help him regain his sanity. This news was a lot for me and the anxiety I had tamed earlier came rushing back. I stood up.

I looked at Severus who seemed to be confused. I turned away and walked over to the kitchen. I needed to do something to distract myself again. I browsed through the cabinets and found a bag of coffee. With shaky hands I opened it and set to making coffee the muggle way.

I remembered meeting Broderick many times when I had started my work as an Unspeakable. He had been training me along with Susan. He hadn’t been as talkative as Susan and had kept mostly to himself. But he had been polite and even sometimes cracked jokes. He had a peculiar voice, which made him stood out and a mournful face. I had always wondered why he looked the way he did, but I had never gathered the strength to ask.

I filled a measure cup with water and walked back to the coffeemaker. I heard Severus get up and follow me into the kitchen. A light touch on my shoulder let me know that he was standing next to me. I sensed his aura trying to calm me down. I guessed it was a lot of work.

“What about the attacker?” I managed to ask when I closed the lid from the coffeemaker and pressed the power switch.

“He has not been identified yet”, Severus said. A small silent pause followed. “But I have my suspicions.”

“Did you give up the memory?”

“No.”

I turned to look at him. He had a serious expression on his face. What did he mean by no? Surely the evidence was enough to prove the identity of the attacker?

“What? Why?”

“We need to do everything in order to shield your involvement with the order.”

What was he talking about? He made no sense. We had solid evidence of the attack and he refused to hand it in? I needed to do something. Today I would give up the memory. I shook my head and turned my head to the boiling coffeemaker.

“No, no, we need to find the attacker”, I argued. He wasn’t making any sense at all.

“Maria, look at me”, Severus commanded. I felt a shift in his aura and I turned my head slightly towards his direction. “The minute your testimony gets out they will know. They will come for you. Your mind as a seer is complicated but it’s inevitable they’ll break into it.”

“But –“

“Dumbledore already spoke about this matter. He forbids you to take any action which would risk your status as a seer and as an active order member”, Severus explained.

I gripped the counter. I was supposed to do nothing? Sit tight while Bode suffered in the hospital ward? It could be me in that ward right now. If the attacker had forced me instead of him. My head was filled with thoughts, each thought bringing more to this endless hurricane inside my head. I had too much energy to think clearly.

The wooden counter under my hands was starting to steam and darken. My fingers were sending magic through and burning the material under them. I stared daggers at the coffeemaker and tried to get my thoughts in order. I didn’t notice Severus’s aura trying to calm me as I was lost in my own head.

It could have been me. The conflict of realizing the reality of the situation. The measures you-know-who was willing to take in order to gain control. Of course, I had known it all before, we had discussed everything in order meetings. But to actually get to see the misery he caused, to have it happen where I worked made me see everything from a completely new perspective. With this new-found realization, I didn’t smell the smoke or hear Severus trying to call my name.

A war was coming. A real war. Not some political coup but an actual fight between an oppressor and the ones who wanted to protect everything that was good. Bode wasn’t the first to lose his life and wouldn’t be the last.

I took a deep breath in as the thoughts finally seemed to have reached their peak. My mind had told me what it needed to and now it was only repeating everything I had learned in the past 24 hours. I let my energy surrender the walls it built and allowed Severus to calm me.

I let him grab my hands from the countertop and extinguish the sizzling embers with a wordless spell. He turned me towards him and examined my hands carefully. They were burnt, I could feel that already. I could feel the stinging pain under my skin of my fingers and palms.

One of Severus’s slender fingers brushed over my right palm gently and I hissed at the sensation. His gaze met mine and I saw the muscles in his jaw clench. He let my hands go and lifted his ight hand to his side.

“Accio cloack”, he cast with his deep voice.

A black cape flew to his outstretched hand and he brought it to his left hand while he searched the pockets with the right. I stood there numbly observing him while holding my hands in front of my torso.

Severus pulled out a small metal box from one of his pockets and laid it on the table. “Engorgio”, he said and the box grew bigger to a travel sized potions kit. He rolled the sleeves of his shirt up to his elbows.

The box clicked open and Burn-healing paste levitated out of it. The tall wizard opened the container and poured some of the orange thick paste onto his fingers before looking at me.

“Give me your hands”, he instructed.

I did as he wanted and shivered when the cold sludge came in contact with my burnt skin. Severus was thorough with applying the cream onto every piece of burnt skin and made sure it was enough. I already felt it starting to take an effect as my skin started to tingle.

“Ferula”, he mumbled and clean bandages appeared and wrapped themselves around my hands.

Severus moved to close the lid of the jar and place it back in the box. I grabbed his sleeve and met his piercing gaze.

“Thank you”, I said.

Severus nodded slightly and I let go of him.

With a wave of his wrist, the lid closed and the box shrunk back to a pocket-size kit. I watched as he went over to the sink to wash his hands. I felt helpless. After having so many emotions and thoughts, somehow now that I was calm, I didn’t know what to do. I guessed I was still recovering from the anxiety attack and knew why I felt numb.

I didn’t want to think what just happened and was only now realizing that I needed to somehow fix my counter. It was a mess with black cinders and cracked wood. I needed to fix it before my landlord saw any of it. I added it to my mental list of stuff I needed to take care of. I guess a simple “reparo” couldn’t fix this.

I looked down to my bandage -covered hands. The work was fine and the bandages just right. Severus would make a good healer if he ever wanted to. I guessed being a potions master was more interesting to him. Something I would never be able to do.

The faucet closed and I heard water dripping slowly. I looked up and gained some of my confidence back. I crouched and opened a cabinet on my right and took two mugs out. Severus’s black eyes met mine. He raised one eyebrow. I couldn’t tell what he was feeling. Even his aura seemed to have no specific emotions.

“Would you like coffee?” I asked and stood up. I slipped some humor in my voice. I needed to find a way to relieve the tension within me.

“You do have a unique way of handling certain situations”, Severus seemed to mock me.

“I made enough for two”, I said and raised the pot in the air. The bandages felt slippery against the plastic handle.

Severus shook his head slightly. “Idiotic girl”, he muttered under his breath.

I snorted and poured steaming coffee in both cups. He needed to find better ways to insult me or soon they wouldn’t work anymore. I put the pot back in the maker and picked up my mug and stepped slowly away from the kitchen and made my way to the living room and onto the sofa. I glanced at the clock on my bookshelf. I still had time before I needed to leave the apartment.

Severus followed after me and sat on the leather armchair. He made room on the table and moved the book so he could put his cup down. He leaned back and relaxed slightly. With his sleeves rolled up, the dark mark was completely visible on his left forearm.

I could sense that the magical tattoo had left a dark imprint in his aura. I concluded that’s why it had been so easy for me to guess that he had something to do with dark magic when I had met him for the first time.

He noticed my stare and moved his hand out of sight. He wasn’t used to showing the mark so freely. I lowered my eyes. I hadn’t meant for him to feel uncomfortable. I reached for my cup and brought it to my lips.

“Have you figured out why your wards let me enter when no one else can?”, the professor asked.

I lowered my cup. “No, I haven’t. I have redone them again and again and nothing seems to be incorrect.”

I should have paid it more attention. But with everything going on, it had completely slipped my mind. I mentally hit myself for being so careless.

Severus was silent for a few moments before drawling out, “Nothing is incorrect. Your wards work perfectly.”

I furrowed my brows at him. “Then how?”

Severus raised his chin and crossed his legs. His dress pants lifted up a little and I could see black socks peeking out from under them. Did he ever wear anything else than black?

“You surely have heard about magical compability? I wouldn’t believe that a professional see’er would be so incompetent than to not remember something like that?”

I leaned forward and put my cup on the table in thought. The concept was slightly familiar. I remembered some talk about it in Durmstrang on my 6th year. But apparently the subject hadn’t been so important as I hadn’t thought about it since.

“I have heard about it”, I answered simply. “It was introduced briefly during the training and then never talked about again.”

“It’s amusing to see you use your skills on everything else but the one thing that’s right in front of you”, Severus chuckled. “Now, why do you think your wards don’t work on me?”

I took a deep breath in. He surely didn’t mean we were compatible? The chances for two connected people of finding each other were small. Compatibilities happened, but most of the time they went unnoticed. Not everyone grew to sense magic around them so easily as see’ers did.

The wheels turned in my head. How had I not seen it before? When it had stared me right in the eyes? It was all making sense now. The way I felt Severus’s magical aura every time we met without even trying to sense it. The way he could enter through the wards and the way my magic responded to his. I had been blind.

“When did you find out?”

Severus must have seen the realization in my eyes. He looked pleased with himself. “I began to suspect it when I inspected your wards for the first time. The way they moved with my magic and let me pass even though I could feel that they were strong enough to keep me away. I shared my concerns with Dumbledore and he suggested the magical compatibility between us.”

“Why did you wait until now to tell me?” I asked shakily. He had known for all this time?

His black eyes were piercing. “My suspicions were confirmed when I entered your mind last night. See’ers minds are naturally programmed to hide any visions the have had or might have”, he said slowly. “Last night I slipped into your mind and found the vision without ever needing to look for it. I found your mind open for me. I touched the countless visions you’ve had without any barriers in between.”

I closed my eyes. I felt a rush of emotions washing through me. All of them different. Shame that I hadn’t realized this earlier, that Severus needed to tell it to me. Grief for what had happened in the vision and a glimmer of happiness in the midst. Something so rare had happened to us.

But on top of all those emotions was fear. Fear that was born just a few moments ago in the kitchen. Fear about the future and the upcoming war.

“And that is why you also want to keep hiding me. Because if they found out about the magical compatibility, they could use me through you. And you would have to do what he wants”

“Yes”, Severus said.

I felt a weight in me. With that word it settled deep and pressed against my heart. Pressed against everything that was dear to me. He would have to do it if I was ever captured. If they ever found out. I would become their weapon in the war. I was sure that they would do everything so I would receive as many visions as was possible. I would be living half a life and half a terrifying dream. I would end up losing my sanity in the process.

I took a couple of deep breaths. I was going to fight them silently. I knew what I had to do. I would continue my tasks and report any visions forward. The order needed me safe if we wanted to win.

My eyes snapped to his. “Who else knows?”

Severus finished the last from his coffee and set the cup of the table. And with a flick of his wand, our cups floated away to the kitchen. He uncrossed his legs and leaned his left palm on his knee. He was getting ready to leave.

“Only you, me and the headmaster”, he answered and stood up.

“Severus-“ I went after him when he stepped away from the chair.

He turned to look at me. His black hair was framing his face and it cast a shadow on his cheek. “I have to go. I have a class to teach.” Severus grabbed his black cloack and slung it over his left arm. He stepped towards the corridor before abruptly stopping and approaching me.

He took one of my bandage covered hands in his and eyed it for the last time. Then his gaze met my eyes and he let go of my hand. He reached up and gently touched a lock of my hair near my collarbone.

My breath caught in my throat when I felt his fingers on my skin. I looked up at him, noticing a few lines on his face. He looked tired and I doubted he had any sleep last night. I wondered how he would change if there was no war. If he was simply free.

“The burns should heal within the day. If they don’t, send for me and I’ll deliver more paste for them”, he murmured.

I nodded and he let my hair go. I watched as he walked out of my apartment with long strides. A few moments later I heard a soft crack and I knew he was gone.

I stood there in the living room for a while trying to process all the information I had learned. I ended up being late to work because of it.

I couldn’t say if it was good or bad, but no-one noticed my lateness as the Department of Mysteries was full of aurors and other crime scene investigators.

I pushed through the masses and found Susan standing near the entrance to the courtrooms. She was looking rough, red puffy eyes and a sad face. Her mouth drew into a small smile as she acknowledged me.

“Hi”, I greeted.

“Have you heard?” She asked.

We both stepped back and let people pass through the corridor. They were levitating some kind of a machine. Each one of them had serious faces. I recognized the uniforms from the crime investigation department.

After they passed, I relaxed slightly and grabbed Susans hand. “I heard.”

Her red hair was hanging loosely on her shoulders. She sniffled and pulled out a tissue paper. “He is now in St. Mungos. I doubt they can do anything to help him”, she said. I heard anger coming through her words. “I hope they find the person responsible for this. I hope they will suffer the consequences.”

She blew her nose on the paper and I tried to push my own emotions aside. “I hope so too, Susan. I hope so too.”

She glanced at me before putting the paper back in the pocket of her blue robes. “Come. The whole department has a meeting. It’s starting soon.”

She pulled me through the main corridor and we entered a small interrogation room. The room was almost never in use. It was the size of a lecture room, benches lined the walls and in the middle stood a podium. The ceiling was high and I felt relieved when I saw no dementors up there.

I looked around and saw Donna and Patrick sitting together. I inclined my head at Susan and we joined the couple. None of us dared to speak as the room filled with our coworkers. I saw Adrian enter and waved at him. He found a place next to me and greeted me with a smile.

The room was soon full and the doors closed. People stared expectantly to the podium, where each head of department stood with auror Kingsley Shacklebolt.

Kingsley quieted the room by lowering his hands. “Last night there was an attack. As many of you have heard, one of us, Broderick Bode, sustained severe magical trauma during it and is now being treated for his injuries.”

Whispers filled the room and Kingsley spoke again. “The auror department will be monitoring the Department of Mysteries for the next weeks. We are doing everything we can to find out who the attacker was”, he finished.

“Don’t you have any idea who it was?” a wizard asked from across the room. I didn’t remember his name, but I recognized his red hair and yellow robes. He worked in the time room.

“As I said, that is everything I can tell you right now.”

More questions we shouted out after that.

I zoned out and looked around the room. Everyone in here had known Broderick in some way. Some of them had worked with him for years. Sorrowful faces, tear stained eyes. Endless serious energy.

I shook my head and gathered my thoughts. I pulled my aura back and tried to ignore all the energy in the room. I had enough stress today already.

The meeting ended shortly after and all of us were sent back to their respective departments. All of us except the Department of Mysteries.

We gathered in the break room with our head of a department, Anne Vance. She was a charismatic witch and even though she could be harsh, I liked her. And I knew her sister, Emmeline Vance who was in the order. I doubted Anne knew about it.

She sat us all down and explained the seriousness of the situation. The told more details. Details which were forbidden to tell to someone who was an outsider to our section.

“You need to take a great care every day in here. Be on your toes. This was a planned attack. They were after a prophecy. They will be after it again.” With those words we were all sent away. We weren’t needed in the department today.

As soon as I got away from the ministry, I apparated back home.

I entered the empty house and stepped through the corridor to the living room. Everything was so warm and inviting and yet I felt like a complete mess.

I sat on the sofa and huffed. Everything that had happened came crashing down. The same weight on my heart started pressing on it again and I let silent tears roll down my cheeks. I was tired and stressed.

I didn’t want to think about Broderick. I didn’t want to think about the death eaters. Or the danger Severus was in because of me. But I couldn’t fight the raging storm inside of my mind so I succumbed to it instead. So, I let the tears fall and images of war fill my mind.