Garden Talk
Sirius woke up with a splintering headache. He grabbed his aching head as he glanced around a bit confused as to where he was. He slowly realized he was lying in the grass. Sitting up carefully, he saw his brother was asleep on the table, beside him Pandora was using the tablecloth as a blanket. The Mad Hatter and Barty were cuddling underneath the table a few feet away from Sirius. Barty was laying directly on top of him, his head buried in his shoulder. The Mad Hatter had one arm draped along Barty’s back, the other laying stretched out beside him. His top hat was discarded nearby. Suddenly all the events from last night crashed down onto him, the tea, his drunk brother, the swirling colors, the voice. SHIT!! Sirius bolted upright and dragged his sleeping brother off the table.
“Huh?” Reg asked, wiping his eyes. “No time to explain! We have to leave before they offer more tea!” Even just mentioning the tea made Sirius want to forget everything and have another cup. Shaking his head, he grabbed his brother by the arm and forced him out of the gate and onto the path.
“How are you feeling?” Sirius asked Regulus once he had the chance to wake up.
“Hungover.” He muttered he blinked a few times before asking, “Do you remember much?”
“Not a lot except for swirling colors.” Sirius said shaking his head.
“Yeah, same. That Pandora girl was nice though.”
“Aw Reggie! You made a friend!” Sirius said, trying to pull his brother into a hug. Reg tried to hide a smile as he swatted his brother away.
“Who knows. It could’ve been a lie…” Reggie said looking a bit sad.
“Hey,” Sirius said bumping into his brother, “I saw you guys, she looked like she was having a lot of fun talking to you.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.” Reggie smiled then immediately tried to hide it again.
“Oh, I forgot to mention I saw Peter again.”
“You did? I thought I was just hearing voices.”
“No, he was there. Barty offered him tea, but he declined saying he was late.” Reg said rolling his eyes.
“Huh, how were we ahead of him?”
“I don’t know. I thought figuring out Doorknob’s name put us way behind him.” Sirius shrugged. They walked in silence for a while. Sirius kicked rocks down the path and whistled a tune, while Reg tried his hardest to ignore him.
“I’m getting hungry.” Sirius stated after a while.
“I don’t know if there’s anything we can eat here.”
“Oh, I know a place to eat!” Both brothers stopped in their tracks and looked around for the strange intruding voice.
“If it’s another door...” Reg started.
“I’m not a door!” The voice said with a laugh. The voice sounded like it was next to them. Turning around, Sirius gasped as two beady orange eyed stared at them.
“Then who the fuck are you?” Reg asked the beady eyes; he didn’t sound nearly as scared as he looked. The beady eyes started getting closer, it took everything in Sirius to stay where he was and not bolt. Actually, why wasn’t he running? Maybe he should grab Reg and tell him to start-
“I’m James Potter!” Sirius immediately felt the fear leave his body as he looked at the boy next to him. He looked very familiar, but he couldn’t figure out why. He had dark skin with crazy messed up hair. His glasses were tilted to the side, and he was wearing a big bright smile. His outfit was atrocious, he was wearing a pink and purple striped suit. His top hat and cane were the same color as well.
“Excuse me?” Sirius said covering his mouth so he wouldn’t laugh.
“James Potter! At your service! And I know the most wonderful place to eat! Follow me!” James began walking off the path into a different part of the woods.
“Woah, woah, woah! We were told to stay on the path!” Sirius glanced over at his brother for support but found him staring ahead at their new friend. Sirius glanced between the two of them for a moment. That was interesting.
“Who in the world told you that!” James asked, sounding astonished.
“Um Mary,” Regulus supplied. James gave him a devilish smile; Sirius almost slapped him for looking at his baby brother that way.
“And who might you be?”
“Regulus. And this is Sirius,” he said with a small blush starting to form. Sirius was gonna kill this James guy.
“Ah and pretty stars like you don’t belong on a boring path! Come on! Let’s go the fun way!” James started to go into the woods again.
“No. I don’t think so!”
“Why not?” James said pouting.
“Because we have to stay on the path.” Sirius said, putting his foot down. Normally he would’ve said yes to the funny looking, charming man trying to take them off the path. However, he fears his brother might do something stupid if that were to happen.
“Yeah, we should stay on the path.” Regulus agreed.
“Fine. But I hate to be the one to tell you this. Mary can be very forgetful and sometimes lead people into dead ends with confusing riddles and sayings. Or sometimes just literally. Ta ta now!’ James said he walked backwards into the forest, his whole body disappearing except for two beady orange eyes that were staring at them and a giant smile.
“Well, he was something.”
“Yes, he was.” Reg responded looking at the place where James disappeared from.
“I swear Regulus. If your first crush is some crazed man in a purple suit, I will never let you live it down.” Regulus coughed and hurried to get in front of Sirius.
“Of course not! Are you crazy? The man was definitely on drugs. Or tea? Let’s just go!”
“Aw Reggie you look flustered!”
“Can it!” Reggie hissed trying to hide his blush. Sirius just laughed at the state his brother was in. Now Sirius wasn’t an expert on dating by any means, he has kissed a girl or two nothing much. However, he could never see himself getting flustered, having someone turn him into a mess. That would just never happen to him. They continued their journey until the path suddenly ended. Sirius turned to look at Reggie to find him with his eyebrows knitted together.
“This is exactly what James said was going to happen.”
“Did someone say James?” Sirius wanted to gauge out his eyes. He did not follow them! Sirius watched the bright white smile turn into James.
“I see the path has ended.”
“We all have eyes here.” Sirius said, crossing his arms over his chest. His younger brother was staring unashamedly at James. James began giggling a little uncontrollably at that. Making it a lot harder to stay mad at him.
“You’re funny, mate!” James said, gaining control of himself.
“So do you know the way or not?” Sirius said trying hard not to smile but failing by a long shot.
“Of course, I know the way! You either go this way!” James said pointing to the left, “or you can go this way!” he said, crossing his arms and pointing to the right. “But of course, there always the other way.” He said, turning to the side motioning to the left again. “And we could never forget this way.” He said, extending his arm to the right again. And Sirius was going to kill him again.
“But which way do we go?”
“Which way do you wanna go?”
“The right way!”
“Which right?” James asked, turning in a circle pointing at each right side.
“The right that will lead us to the Queen!” Sirius yelled.
“The Queen? Why didn’t you say so?” Sirius began grinding his teeth to keep from snapping at James. Reg was covering his mouth as he chuckled.
“Show us the way James.” Reg said. James, who had never stopped smiling in the first place, seemed to beam even brighter.
“But which right way to the Queen do you want to take?”
“You’ve got to be kidding me! I’m to hungry to deal with morons!” Sirius yelled.
“Now you know how I feel every day.” Reg muttered.
“You’re hungry? I know a great place to eat! Follow me!” Both brothers stared after him for a second before running to catch up.
“It’s just up here!” James said pointing forward. They walked to a tiny clearing where they saw a massive garden. And not just the land space was large, the plants were massive. Sirius had to crane his neck just to see the underside of the flowers. James seemed neutral about the whole thing and kept moving straight on forward. He marched them through several different rows of plants before he reached the fruit portion of the garden. “We’re here!” He announced.
“And how do we reach it?” Sirius asked, looking up at the absolutely massive and very far away fruit.
“Reach what?”
“The food!”
“Oh, I don’t know.” James replied leaning on his striped cane.
“Well then how are we supposed to eat!”
“You’re hungry?” Sirius could feel his patience running out. If he didn’t eat soon, James was going to be on the menu.
“You’re stupid?” James barked another laugh at the comment. Sirius sucked in a big breath. He can do this. Reg does this all the time Sirius reminded himself. Which is probably why he’s handling it a lot better.
“Reg do something!” Sirius hissed.
“Like what?”
“I don’t know anything!”
“Fine, fine.” Reg walked over to wear James was smelling a purple flower and gently tapped his shoulder.
“Well, hello little star.” James said looking down at Reggie through his eyelashes. Sirius watched as Reg opened and closed his mouth a few times. His eyebrows turning down into a frown.
“You’re outfit’s ridiculous.” He settled on. Well, that was helpful. James just smiled at him.
“Thank you! Mary made it for me!”
“She shouldn’t have.” Reg said turning even more red. Poor boy, he’s never going to get a boyfriend if this is how he flirts.
“I’ll make sure to let her know!”
“Let’s just go and find food elsewhere!” Sirius said, trying to help Reggie out of this mess. No matter how funny it was watching him get flustered.
“Oh, I know a place!”
“Absolutely not.”
“Why not?” James said, pouting again.
“Because the last place you took us. Here.” Sirius said gesturing around them, “We can’t even eat anything. And I’m much more fun when I’m fed.”
“He’s right.” Reg said with a sigh, “He gets hangry.”
“Hmm, well we can just ask the flowers for help.”
“Ask the flowers?” Reg questioned.
“Yep! Just this way!” James led them through several twists and turns before they came to the sunflowers. There Sirius saw three girls sitting on a massive mushroom giggling and doing each other’s makeup. He immediately recognized one of the girls as Mary. She had changed her outfit and was now in a tight-fitting pink sparkly dress that went down to her mid thighs. Silver hoop earrings and more silver rings.
Mary was doing a plus-sized red-haired girl’s makeup. The red-haired girl had very long wavy hair that reached her waist. She was wearing a flowy pink and red skirt with a green tank top, that hugged all her curves. She wore mushroom earrings and several handmade bracelets on each wrist. She had freckles all over her face and arms. She was very pretty.
The final girl sat beside them, painting her nails. She was fit and had chopped blonde hair that looked pretty bad ass. She had earrings going all the way up on both ears. On her left ear she had a paper clip in the first hole. She wore a black button-down shirt that she had cropped, and a pair of black trousers with skulls and roses embroidered into them. Sirius had never seen such cool outfits before. He was jealous they looked like that, and he and his brother were wearing plain button-down shirts and trousers.
“Hello flowers!”
“Hey James! You’re looking great as always!” Mary said mirroring James’ giant grin. Marlene looked up and gave him a two-fingered salute.
“I see you have company.” Lily said looking over at the Black brothers.
“Ah, these are my new friends, Regulus and Sirius! Poor things are famished and need a bit of help reaching the fruit.”
“I hope you didn’t cause them to much trouble, James.” Lily scolded.
“Me? Never!” James said clutching his heart. Lily rolled her green eyes with a fond smile.
“Come on. Plums just got into season.” The three girls stood up and motioned for them to follow. It amazed Sirius how big this garden was. The girls led them effortlessly through making lots of twists and turns till they reached the plum trees.
“I do love plums!” James said with a grin.
“I’ll get it this time!” Marlene said. She jumped up and made her way towards the nearest plum tree. She leaned close and whispered something into the bark. Sirius leaned forward confused by what was happening. When the whole tree started shaking. James started laughing beside them. Suddenly a giant plum fell from the sky and landed in front of the group. It was a few inches taller than Sirius.
“Brilliant as always!” James said clapping his hands. Marlene gave a mock bow.
“Thank you, thank you.” Marlene turned towards Sirius and gave him a flashy smile.
“I hope Bertha gave you fresh one.” Sirius noticed that she had her tongue pierced, for the first time.
“Bertha?” He asked.
“The tree.” She responded as if it was obvious.
“Uh huh.” Sirius walked over to the massive plum, and suddenly didn’t know what to do. His brother looked just as conflicted.
“Go on. Try it!” Lily encouraged.
“Their delicious! I just had one earlier today!” James said. Sirius weighed his options for a moment before deciding to just delve right in and take a bite. His teeth sank easily into the ripe fruit, and he could’ve groaned from how good it was.
“You’ve got to try this Reg! It’s so good!”
“You’ve got juice dripping down your face!” Reg said in disgust. Sirius ignored him and went in for another bite. “Ok, wow. This is really good.” Sirius pulled his face out of the plum for a moment to watch Reg. He looked like he was enjoying it just as much as Sirius was. The food here was much better than it was at home. Everything was so much sweeter.
“Right!” They both ate until they were full. Neither of them realized the mess they made of themselves. They were covered in plum juice. Their clothes were soaked, and their skin was sticky.
“You guys really liked that huh?” Lily asked with a look of concern on her face. Regulus turned bright red beside him as Sirius tried to think of a response, thankfully James helped them out.
“Well, who doesn’t!? And I know some of the best clothe makers in Wonderland!”
“What’s Wonderland?” Sirius asked. “
Well, you’re in it of course! How about it freshly made one-of-a-kind clothing?”
“You can’t just sell us out like that!” Mary complained.
“We’ll offer our services if we want to!” Marlene said annunciating the ‘we.’ James giggled in response. All three girls rolled their eyes. Before sharing a look with each other.
“Yeah ok, we’ll do it.” Lily said.
“Does he ever stop laughing?” Reg asked side eyeing James, which just made James laugh harder.
“No, he doesn’t.” Lily replied glaring at him. “He can be very annoying. Unfortunately, he’s also very kind and easy to talk to.” She lowered her voice before saying, “Or else we probably would’ve dropped him years ago.” Sirius ended up walking beside James on the way back his brother was talking to Lily and Mary about what kind of outfit he wanted.
“So, how are you enjoying Wonderland? In wonder yet?” James asked him as he twisted his cane in the air.
“I love it here! Everything is so colorful! Nothing like my world.”
“Ah yes. I was once from a different land many, many years ago. I’m glad I was horrible at tennis it landed me here!” Suddenly Sirius new exactly who this man was. He saw him on the memory walls!
“I saw it!” Sirius blurted out without thinking. James gave him a confused smile.
“I mean when I fell down the hole…I saw you fall down it…sorry that doesn’t make much sense.”
“No, no. That makes perfect sense! We fell down the same hole! How exciting!” James grinned.
“There’s more than one hole?” Sirius questioned.
“Well of course! There’s never just one door.” James said cheerfully.
“Huh, I guess so.”
“So, how did you two end up down here?”
“Um, we jumped?” Sirius said meekly.
“Jumped!?” James said barking out a laugh, “I like it! But why?”
“We were following Peter…” James eyes got comically wide.
“You were following Peter! Out of all things! Peter made you jump!”
“Yes. Why are you shocked?” Sirius said, getting embarrassed.
“I love Peter don’t get me wrong. But um he’s probably the most well… To put it nicely, the most normal thing down here. I would assume something more eye appealing would make someone jump into a deep hole…”
“Well, he was the most interesting thing I’ve ever seen at the time.” Sirius defended.
“You must live a boring life…”
“Hey! I do not-“ Sirius stopped midsentence, watching as James cackled and realized he was joking. “Ha. Ha.” Sirius said sarcastically, shaking his head with a smile.
“You’re too easy!” James said. “I was just playing. I’d jump off of anything for Pete!”
“I feel like you’d jump off anything for anyone.” Sirius muttered.
“For most people yeah.” Sirius was shocked at how serious he sounded at the moment. Like he really would jump off a cliff for most people. It seemed as though there was more to James than he had originally thought. They arrived back at the mushrooms, where Sirius washed himself off a bit before he was grabbed by Marlene and dragged on top of a mushroom.
“Let’s design you an outfit!” She said with a smirk, “Have any ideas?”
“I don’t know, I like your crop top.” She grinned.
“Ok, let’s start off with your favorite colors.”
“Black, um yellow. I also love purple. OH! Could I get a leather jacket!” Sirius said suddenly, remembering the one he left at home.
“Leather jacket? Huh, I’ll have to ask Lily and Mary if they have one. If not there’s a guy with a carriage who sells them.”
“The wizard!” Sirius practically yelled, eyes going wide.
“The wizard? Is that what he’s calling himself now? Ha, Loser.” Marlene said with a chuckle.
“Yeah, he sold me one. And turned my brother into a cat. And-“ Marlene busted out laughing.
“Potter needs to stop teaching people magic.” She said shaking her head.
“Magic?” Sirius questioned.
“Yeah, magic. Everyone has it. You just got to learn how to use it.”
“So could I learn?”
“I just said everyone could.”
“Right.”
“Ask James. He can teach you. He’s the second best ‘wizard’” Marlene said putting air quotes around wizard, “I know.”
“Who’s the first?” Sirius asked as Marlene took out a roll of tape measure out, and began taking his measurements.
“Lupin, of course. But he’s sort of a lone wolf. I’d leave him alone if I were you. He only tolerates very few people. Put your arms to the side.” Marlene measured his wingspan before wrapping the measuring tape around his waist.
“Who?”
“Hmm?” She asked as she scribbled down the numbers on a notepad that looked like it just appeared.
“Who are the people he tolerates.”
“Oh lily. Sometimes Pete. But only if he’s not late. And um surprisingly his best friend is James.” Sirus’s mouth dropped open at that.
“James? He doesn’t like people but tolerates him!?”
“Trust me. We were all shocked. Ok I’m gonna take these measurements to Lily and Mary and start on the outfits. Make yourself at home or whatever.” With that the short-haired girl jumped down and made her way to a different mushroom, where Lily and Mary were designing Reg’s outfit. Sirius walked over to where Reg and James were talking. Whatever they were talking about seemed to be affecting Reggie a lot. His cheeks were bright red, and he looked like he was trying very hard to be mad. While James wore a big bright smile and was leaning a little too close for Sirius’s liking. He was wiping the plum juice off Reg’s face, with a white handkerchief. Sirius rolled his eyes as he got closer and was able to hear more of their conversation.
“Good as new!” James said, putting the stained cloth he used back into his chest pocket.
“Thanks.” Reg said avoiding eye contact with him.
“You know you look awful good in purple I wonder what other colors would suit you.” James said leaning down towards a very red Reg. Sirus rushed to place himself between the two. James looked a bit shocked at first by Sirius’s presence, before straightening up. “Sirius! Me and your brother were just getting to know each other!”
“Not too well I hope.” Sirius said, crossing his arms. Reg shoved him away from the two of them and gave Sirius a glare. “Do you need something?” Reg asked, his mouth pressed firmly together into a line.
“Yes, actually I wanted to ask James if he could teach us magic!” James turned curiously toward him, while Reg folded his arms.
“Magic?” Regulus asked.
“Uh huh! Mary said everyone could learn how to and that James is the second best at it.”
“Only second best?” Reg teased. James snickered.
“Unfortunately, so.” James said, shaking his head. “Speaking of which, the first best is the only one who could teach you. The longer you live here, the easier it is to learn and wield magic. I doubt I’d be able to teach it to you by myself. You’d have to go to Lupin.”
“Lupin? As in wolf? The one who Mary said wanted to be left alone?” Reg inquired.
“The very one!”
“Can you take us to him? I heard your one of the few people he tolerates.” Sirius said.
“Tolerates!” James said sounding scandalized. “He does not just tolerate me! I’ll have you know he came down here to rescue me when I fell! We have been best friends for over 300 years! Tolerates me! Jeeze! Did Marlene say that! She’s just salty he doesn’t like her and-“
“Ok, ok we get it! Lupin and you are best friends!” Sirius said, cutting James off his rant.
“Wait, how old are you?” Reg asked, scrunching up his face.
“Oh, 314! It was my birthday last week.
“You’re kidding.”
“I do love kidding, but no. You stop aging while you’re here. So, even though I look 19. I am in fact 314 years old. Me and Lupin became friends when we were 12. We were in the same orphanage! What fun memories!” Sirius and Reg both stared at him.
“So, if we don’t leave. We would also never age?”
“That is correct!”
“So, why doesn’t Lupin like anyone?” Sirius asked.
“He just has had a lot of bad people in his life. He doesn’t trust them anymore. It had always been just me and him until we meant Peter down here. It’s kind of impossible to hate him. He was born and raised down here. Very kind, kind of odd. I love him!”
“Wait. I thought you said no one ages down here?” Reg said. “How did Peter grow up?”
“Oh, did I say that? That isn’t quite true. People down here just age very slowly. The older you are the slower you age. Which is why this is the first ever coronation. The last king and Queen reigned for thousands of years!”
“That’s insane.” Reg muttered.
“Isn’t everything!”
“No just you.” James gave him a wide grin full of teeth. Sirius was going to barf.
“Stop flirting with my baby brother! And you!” He said pointing at Reg, “stop flirting with crazy people!”
“Never heard that one before.” James said with a grin.
“Shocking. So will you take us to Lupin’s?”
“Sure, why not?” James said with a grin,” But we should start heading back. Gonna be dark soon.” James said gesturing to the setting sun turning the sky to bright pink. “The flowers have lots of places to stay!” “As long as it’s not on top of a table!” Reg grumbled. James walked them back to the mushrooms where the girls were lounging. Lily had her head in Mary’s lap and Mary was absent-mindedly stroking it.
“Flowers! Our friends require rooms for the night! I’ll see you all in the morning!” James announced. “Where are you going?” Reg asked him. “To my home of course! Good night!” The group watched as James disappeared into the forest with his great white smile, leaving last.
“So dramatic!” Lily said, rolling her eyes. “Come on, I’ll show you to your rooms. Lily led them to the base of a giant apple tree. “Open up, Ally!” she said to the tree. The minute she said it a door appeared and swung open.
“This place is crazy.” Reg said.
“You should find everything you need in there! Night!” Once Lily left Sirius began examining the house. It was small, but very cute. There was a wooden table and chairs for four people off to the side. With a lantern giving them light. A little kitchen in the back and a small living room that was flowered themed. The walls were green, with flowers painted all over them. There was a wooden table with a glass cover that also had flowers on it. The couch and chairs were off white and were set in a half circle. Upstairs they found the bedroom. There was only one, but it had two beds. It was mushroomed themed. The rug was in the shape of a rug. The beds were red with white spots. The lamp was also a mushroom. On one of the walls even had a small mushroom bookshelf with a few tattered books on it.
“It looks nice.” Sirius said looking over at his brother.
“I’m going to take a shower.” While Regulus was showering Sirius decided to read one of the old books. He chose a random one. It was blue and purple with a rabbit, cat, and butterfly on it. Sirius opened it up and quickly learned it was the history of wonderland. A lot of the papers were worn out and tattered. However, it hardly mattered because there were no words in it. Every page was just a very detailed picture of people. The first page was of a family who were all crowned in their palace. The pictures were too hard to see, but he could tell they were very beautiful. He flipped through the book and looked at many different people who had lived in Wonderland. Some who looked just as unique as wonderland was. With bright, flashy hair and glittery skin. Others looked like the people Sirius sees every day. He flipped to the end where he saw someone he immediately recognized. It was James he was standing next to a very handsome boy with blonde wavy hair. They looked like they were laughing together. They were in front of a beautiful blue and purple house that had to have been extremely expensive to make.
“What are you reading?” Reg asked when he returned from his shower.
“Look at this!” Sirius said, showing the page to his brother. “James?” Regulus asked, taking the book from him.
“I wonder who the man next to him is?”
“I don’t know. But he sure is fine.” Reg rolled his eyes at that.
‘Hey! You have no right to roll your eyes at me! You practically drool whenever James walks into the room!”
“That’s a complete exaggeration.” Reg said tossing the book back to Sirius.
“Not even gonna deny it anymore Reg?”
“Night Sirius.” Reg said, turning off the lights. Sirius cackled until sleep overtook him