saviour complex

As they got down to Hogsmead Lily was surprised how easily the conversation flowed.
She had hardly noticed how long they had walked.
She and James talked about music and she discovered he knew a surprising amount of muggle bands thanks to Remus and Sirius's obsession with music.
She was even more surprised to find out he knew about ABBA and Fleetwood Mac two of Lily's favourite bands.

"Oh Yeah ABBA!" James said excitedly after Lily had asked if he'd heard of them.
She half wondered I'd he was lying at first. But then he started humming the tune to; "Take a chance on me."
The humour of James Potter singing this to her. Was not lost on Lily.
James smiled at her cheekily realising she understood what he was saying with the song. Lily smiled and shook her head at him. He looked at her with false innocence.

"What? I'm only humming"Take a chance on me."

He smiled shrugging as if his message was unintentional.

Lily raised her eyebrows not having bought his "unawareness".
She smiled at the messy-haired boy.

"What do you think I'm doing right now?"

She looked at him again as she said this and his eyes looked like they were filled with something like hope.
And Lily once again wondered if maybe James Potter for some mysterious reason actually did like her. Even just a little.
Why was that thought so exciting?
Lily tried to snap herself out of thought before she got carried away.

"So where actually is this coffee shop Potter?
Lily said as they continued to walk towards the edge of town.

James started to swerve his walk to the right without responding.

"Potter?" Lily repeated.

James came to a stop and Lily walked over to him looking confused still.
In one swift movement, James tucked a strand of Lily's auburn hair behind her ear and tilted her chin upwards.
Lily felt her pulse in her neck. Her heart going rapidly fast to the point it felt like a constant Hum with no break between beats.
She stared into James Potter's deep and dark brown eyes. For the first time, she noticed a ring of slightly lighter brown in his iris. It almost looked like a sun rimming his pupil when the light of the sky caught it. Without a word, James stepped aside. Lily's head was still tilted slightly upwards in the direction where James was standing a second ago. In the place where she had been looking into those brown eyes, she now saw a vintage-looking metal sign.
Shaped like a frog sitting on a mushroom reading.

'Toadstools cafe and books'
It read.

James spoke.
"Here it is."
He stepped toward the door and held it open with one hand his body pressed to the frame of it.

"Ladies first." He winked at Lily.

Lily blushed. She wasn't sure why. Maybe just maybe she wasn't entirely immune to the charm of James Potter.
She swooped through to the door feeling his face flush slightly as she grazed his looming body.

The coffee shop was perfect. Just the kind of place Lily loved. Against each wall, we're bookshelves completely full of tattered and read novels. The chairs and tables were all mismatched and worn. As if each piece of furniture had been previously used and restored.
The smell of buttery baked goods flooded her nose and she was hit with a sudden panic.

What if she had to eat them??

Lily wasn't entirely sure about the calories yet but surely they were packed with fat and sugar if they smelt so good.
Her stomach lurched half with a craving to taste them and half with utter disgust.

James entered behind her and pulled out a chair while she was still in thought.

Lily felt mortified by the idea of eating anything in here.

"Is this table ok?" James asked politely still holding out the chair for Lily to sit on.

James had picked the corner table next to the window looking out to the street and the forest on the edge of the town.

"Of course, it's lovely in here," Lily said without thinking.

"I thought you might like it." James smiled genuinely at her.

Not a minute after they were seated a motherly looking witch approached them.
She had a mass of black curls and a sturdy and soft-looking frame. A gingham apron wrapped around her large waist and a sweet smile on her jolly face.

"Here's the menu m' lovelies." She beamed putting two menus on the middle of the table.
"Lunch special's pumpkin pasties! Quite good if I do say so m'self! Call o'er when you're ready to order dears." She beamed and walked off.

"Fancy a pumpkin pastie?" James smiled.

445

Lily felt so panicked by these words and fear rose in her like a boiling kettle about to whistle.
She was about to start aiming for under 900 calories a day. There was no way she could each half a day's worth on a tiny fat-filled pastry.

"I'm not really hungry right now" Lily lied through her teeth.
She wasn't technically hungry. She was starved.

James didn't think anything of this brushing it off lightly.

"No bother. How about we just order some drinks first." He smiled up at Lily

If only Marlene and Mary would buy this excuse so easily she thought. She caught herself then.

There James was sitting across from her and being a perfect gentleman. And all that was on her mind was calories. It felt shameful.

"Alright sounds good." Lily smiled at him.

He looked at her so genuinely. There was something so refreshing about this side of him. Something she never knew the relief of before.

"I think I'll get a chai latte," James said looking at the menu.

200 or 240 with full-fat milk.

"I think I'll just get a green tea." Lily smiled.

The friendly waitress soon came over and James ordered for the two of them.

"Is that all?" She asked smiling.

Before Lily could say yes James replied.
"That's all for now but we might order some pastries later they smell great!"

James had such an easy manner with people he was truly a marvel in his ability to charm practically anyone.

The waitress gushed.
"Well, I do make them m'self ." She grinned

"Oh, then I'm sure they taste great!" Janes said kindly to the older lady.

"Oh, aren't you the charmer." She chuckled "You hold on to him lovie nice boys are a rare find!"
Before Lily could object she had already left to make the order.

Lily looked at James.
"It's amazing how you do that you know."

He looked puzzled.
"Do what?"

Lily shrugged.
"It just seems to come so naturally to you."

"What does?"

Lily smiled at the clueless boy and shrugged.
"Life."

James laughed.

"Why are you laughing I mean it."

"How so Evans?" James said smiling at her in a slightly irritating manner which would have been annoying if it wasn't for who was smiling.

"Well first of all you top classes without trying ."

"The classes aren't really hard." He responded.

"Well, what about Quidditch you're the youngest captain in history. "

"I just like the sport"

"Alright but what about people? No matter how many pranks you pull even teachers love you. You practically have your own fan club
James. You make it look so easy I guess. Everywhere you go people just fall in love with you."

James's jaw tightened ever so slightly and a look of almost sadness crossed his face he shook his head gently.

"That's just not true." He said with a forced sad smile looking at Lily.

"Oh, it is though James. You are James Potter everyone loves you."
She corrected.

He looked at her like there was something she didn't understand.
"Even if it was true, not anyone that counts."

Just then the waitress returned with the drinks as well as a plate full of pastries.
Pumpkin pasties, iced buns, cheese steak parcels, croissants....calories.

"On the house" she winked a James.
"You two looked hungry. If there's one thing I know it's when people are hungry."

"They look amazing thank you ma'am but please let me pay for them," James said gratefully.

"This is too kind of you miss" Lily smiled despite being absolutely terrified of that plate.

"Oh nonsense lovies. I'm happy to share my treats. I make good food and I'm proud of it no one leaves here with just tea! Eat up now." She beamed brightly. "It'll put some hair on your chest," she smiled at James " and meat on your bones." She finished still smiling now at Lily.

Lily winced slightly at these words. She was already fat enough was the waitress trying to embarrass her in front of James?

"Don't mind if I do!" James said smiling graciously at the plump old lady.

She laughed happily and walked back to the kitchen.

"These are delicious Lily you should try one!"
Lily felt ill at the thought and the words of the waitress.

"Put some meat on your bones"

And ruin months of work? No.

"OK with my tea." Lily smiled at James as he reached for another treat off the plate.

Lily looked out the window as she took a sip of the tea.
Her stomach dropped as she saw who was walking towards her.
A thin pale, sharp-nosed boy made eye contact through the window.
Beside him was Mulciber. A brutish boy about as dim as he was large.

Snape Pov
He and Mulciber were tired and bored in Hogsmeade. Mulciber had spent all his money in honeydukes and Snape had none to spend. As they walked to the edge of town from the corner of his eye Snape caught a flash of ginger hair. He turned sharply and instantly felt sick.
There was Lily Evans his old friend. Perhaps the first person to be kind to him. Perhaps the only. And she was sitting in a cafe smiling with James Potter! A filthy blood traitor. A waste of a pureblood and Snape's least favourite person. She was beneath Snape. He thought she was a mud Blood. But she belonged to him.
Not Potter. Snape didn't want her anymore. She was arrogant and naive to think Blood purity wasn't important.
But if he didn't have her no nobody could.
She was probably doing this to hurt him he thought.

To can play at that. Snape saw Lily pick at meals It was pathetic. But at least now he knew how to get to her.

Lily's pov
James finished his steak parcel.
And looked at Lily's shocked expression turning to see what had caused it.

Snape and Mulciber were out of sight in the window and were now walking into the cafe.

Lily barely had time to process a thing before the two were standing by their table.

"You really have stooped so low without me" Snape scoffed. "Really Lil?Resorting to Potter?"

James clenched his jaw in disgust.
"What do you want Snivilous." He spat.

Snape ignored him.
His thin white hand touched the edge of the pastry plate.
"Tsk tsk tsk" He tutted "Oh Lily haven't you ballooned up enough already?"

Lily felt crushed by these words.
She knew what she saw I'm the mirror.
She was reminded of her body every day.
But for Snape to attack her deepest insecurity in front of James was simply too much. Her eyes stung with tears she refused to cry in front of anyone.
She could feel James's eyes on her, taking in the sight of her welling tears.

James's face looked both confused and angry.
"What the fuck does that even mean Snivilous!" He said furiously.
Lily had never seen James Potter so mad.

Snape smirked to Mulciber at their reactions.

"Oh come on Potter. I know you're half blind by your glasses but surely you see how big Lily has gotten over the summer." Snape said cruelly.

James stood up in his seat eyes glaring.
"What the hell are you even saying, you slimy git? Lily is nowhere even close to "big" are you insane how dare a troll like you say a thing like that!" He burst out at Snape.

Severus got what he wanted he turned to Mulciber laughing.
that was the last straw Lily got up from her chair and ran out the door.
She ran in the direction of the forest. Out of the town across the field on its edge till she saw the trees.
Till she felt the air burn in her lungs from exhaustion.
She fell beside the first tree in the forest.
And finally, let the tears she held so tightly fall.