Touch of the Sun
Objectively speaking Regulus did not have easy life. He feels like he's been fighting ever since he can remember. Fighting to protect himself against his parents, for his brother not to forget him when he was leaving for Hogwarts, to be excellent in school, and to secure his place in the Black family. In some battles, he lost some he won, and in some, he is still waiting for results. But not a single injury had hurt more than seeing James Potter give up on him.
He didn’t mean to fall in love with the boy. He never even knew he could fall in love until he did. And that changed everything. It changed Regulus on the molecular base. Every inch of him wants to hold on to that feeling. The warmth that spreads inside him when James so much as looks at him. It gave him hope. Another reason to fight. He would give up anything for James. All James needed to do was ask and Regulus would comply. He would jump out of an Astronomy tower if it was what James wanted. But one thing he can’t do. He can’t put the boy in danger. So, when he says he would give up everything for James. It means he would give up James if it meant saving the boy. He is giving up him.
It hurts that Regulus is not sure he can survive it. Everything in him screams not to say it. But Regulus is nothing but a fighter. So, he fights with himself and wins. “It’s over. I choose my path. You choose yours.”
Somewhere in the back of his mind, Regulus hoped James wouldn’t believe his lie. But he was always a good actor. It’s not James’ fault that it’s too easy to believe Regulus would indeed choose the wrong side of the war.
Regulus will make them pay. Voldemort, his followers, and every single death eater on this planet will pay for taking away even a single minute with this boy made of light, for taking away even a single minute. He has his own plans. He will make sure this war will end. But for that, he has to be on the dark side for a while. He will sneak deep into Voldemort’s ranks; and climb right up to have all the influence he needs. He will wait like the Trojan horse. Work restlessly to ensure a safe word for the boy he loves. But for it to work, James can’t know. He can’t know that all Regulus is doing, all the pain he is in now and will be in the future is for him.
Maybe if he is lucky, he will walk out of a burning Troy alive. He will get the chance to explain it to the boy with tears in his eyes in front of him. And if he is very lucky, he will get to feel the Sun touch him once again.