Chapter 1
2003 - Neville
It was interesting how living in two completely different worlds made one appreciate things differently. Every day, as Neville walked the two blocks from his apartment to the hole in the wall that contained his tiny flower shop, he still felt a small smile creep onto his lips as he watched the world revolve before his eyes. The muggles were so innovative in their own way. He had never known it before, he had looked down on them just like the people he had professed to hate, just in a condescending way instead of outwrite violence. But he knew it now. It was apparent in the double decker buses that bustled past, in the business people talking on their mobiles. Their world was so different to his own, and Neville loved it for that.
It only took a few minutes to get to the shop and another couple to open the door and do the start of the day cash count at the sole register. Then, it was a matter of waiting until a customer came.
A dark head ducked past the sheet of ivy that had made his shop entrance its home, a bronzed bell tinkling overhead. Neville looked up, mouth opening to begin his usual customer service spiel but instead of words emerging his mouth simply hung open, eyes wide and focused on a certain familiar lightning shaped scar.
“Neville? What are you doing here?”
The question forced his mouth to close and Neville blinked.
“I work here.” A pause and then, “What are you doing here?”
“I’m-” Harry broke off, eyes burning a hole in the ground. Neville’s eyes caught on a particular plant sitting in the shade and he shook his head a tad. Surely he wouldn’t have left it there, he knew enough about muggle plants to know that it needed sun, not shade. Moving slowly, he wandered over to it, keeping one eye on Harry. The other man seemed to be locked in his own head, weight shifting nervously side by side. Neville simply moved around the store, making his movements as quiet as possible as to not knock Harry out of his thoughts.
“I wanted to get some flowers.”
The voice was strong, a contrast to his friend’s distant eyes but Harry had always been good at shielding his emotions, at burying them deep down until he couldn’t feel them at all. Emotions didn’t cope well with being compressed though, and as Neville moved back towards Harry at the front of the store, he wondered whether he should say something. The thought remained in his mind right up until he rounded a tall bunch of foxglove and caught sight of the flowers that Harry was staring at.
“Pink carnations. An interesting choice.”
Harry nodded, eyes still fixed on the pale pink flowers. “They’re beautiful.”
They really were. The pink of this bunch was so pale it may as well have been a pearly white but the reason Neville loved them was because of the darker pink that rimmed the edges of the petals, bleeding into the centre of the flower. Even with their beauty, though, Neville’s eyes remained on Harry.
“How have you been?”
Neville started at the sudden question. Harry’s eyes were still on the flowers - he hadn’t been expecting him to speak - but after a moment of fumbling, he answered.
“Alright, I suppose. How ‘bout you?”
Harry shrugged, turning around to observe a bunch of purple carnations swaying in the slight breeze that wandered through the shop. Neville supposed that was answer enough.
“Is there anything I can help you with?”
The other man shook his head, unkempt hair shaking over his forehead. “No, I think I’m okay. I did some research before I came.”
Neville nodded, moving back to stand behind the small desk tucked in the back corner of the shop. His hands clenched, eyes flickering back to where Harry was still standing at the front and sighed. He had things to do, orders to request and deliver but where was he? Pretending to do work because he couldn’t concentrate when faced with one of his old school friends. Ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. Neville scoffed as he turned on the computer, shaking his head as it took its time to start up. One of the few things he missed from the wizarding world was the convincing of having everything at the tip of one’s wand. With knowledge, a wizard could do anything, have anything, like a computer that instantly turned on. Neville scowled at the stupid blank screen, sure it was taking its time just to spite him. He wouldn’t have put it past the muggles to work out how to input personality into electronic devices.
“The on button’s just there.”
Harry was standing in front of the desk, awkwardly holding a hand full of flower stems as he pointed towards the button that Neville had pressed at least 5 minutes ago.
“I’ve pressed it, it just takes a really bloody long time to turn on.” Neville sent the stupid machine another glare.
“Oh. Sorry. I just thought-”
“That I wouldn’t know how to work one? A couple years ago you have been right so no skin off my back.”
Harry’s eyebrows rose slowly. “That’s a muggle phrase…”
Neville nodded. “I’ve been living with muggles since pretty much right after the battle, it’s hard not to pick up a few turns of phrase.”
“I had wondered, after you disappeared.”
He shrugged, not really having anything to say to that and not particularly wanting to go down that path even if he did. Harry didn’t say anything else and as the silence lingered, awkwardness crept into the shop, thick, sudden and utterly unfamiliar. They hadn’t been particularly close at Hogwarts but Harry had always had a way about him that just made people feel at ease in his presence. There had never been this…stiffness in the air. The uncertainty and tentativeness that had characterised their interaction as soon as Harry had ducked through the door of the shop. So Neville did what he always did when unsure. He asked about plants.
Harry looked down at the flowers in his hand as if he had just been reminded that they were there.
“Er, yes. I have most of what I was looking for.” He started laying them on the desk, one by one. The pink carnations and purple hyacinths that he was looking at before. He had also picked out a single white carnation, one purple and one pink orchard and a cluster of forget me nots. Neville stared at them, a sudden lump building in his throat.
“Are - Are these all?”
Harry cleared his throat, his weight shifting from side to side. “No, actually. I was after another flower that I couldn’t find. I may have just missed it or you might not have it but I thought I might as well just check.”
Neville nodded, using the pause in conversation to glance down at the computer, tearing his gaze away from the flowers. They sat so innocuously on his worn bench but even as he looked away, he could feel the pull. Pink and purple swam at the edge of his vision, not quite in focus but taunting him still. He swallowed thickly, chest tightening.
The computer had finally turned on, faint blue light emanating from the monitor, a signal that his home page would soon follow. Neville looked back at Harry, fingers gripping the edge of the bench. The stiffness in his whitening knuckles was his anchor, tying him to the present.
“I can certainly check if I have it in stock.” He fought to keep the strength in his voice, even as it quavered. “It can be hard to find things. Even if it’s not here, I can order it in if you need it.”
Harry nodded slowly, eyes leaving the flowers for the first time, drifting upwards until they locked on Neville’s face.
“I wanted - I wanted purple and white lilacs. If you had them.”
Neville’s heart fell, the final pieces of the puzzle slamming into place. He could feel Harry’s eyes still staring at him, waiting for a reaction so he took a deep breath, forcing his face to remain open and impassive.
“We don’t have any lilacs at the moment because they only bloom at very specific times and never for long-”
“It’s okay, I can find something else-” Harry cut him off but Neville shook his head.
“No, that’s not what I meant. I can get them. It’ll just take a week or so. Spring just began so as long as the weather stays fair, I should get a delivery next week.” A pause and then, “When do you need them?”
Neville winced as he asked the question, waiting with bated breath for Harry to answer. It was a necessary question, one he asked all clients that needed him to order flowers in but even so, he couldn’t help but feel as though he was prying, overstepping some invisible boundary that Harry would never forgive him for.
“Mid next week.”
He breathed a silent sigh of relief. “As long as the flowers come on time, that should be fine then. I can call you when I get an update on the delivery? Or Floo, I suppose.”
Harry shook his head. “No, calling is fine. I live in muggle London as well.”
Neville nodded, not particularly surprised and quickly made a note on a nearby sticky note and stuck it to his computer screen.
“That way I won’t forget.” He added to Harry’s bemused look.
“Alright then. Hang on, I’ll give you my number.”
Neville quickly added it to the sticky note as Harry read it out, mentally thanking Merlin that Harry had a better memory than him. Even without the flower business, it had been nice seeing one of his old school mates again and Neville knew he would have regretted not securing a way to get in contact with Harry again in the future.
“I should - I should probably get going. I’m sure you have stuff you need to do.”
“Yeah, yeah of course. I’ll call you in a couple of days, yeah?”
Harry nodded, starting to turn back towards the entrance before suddenly remembering the bundle of flowers in his hand just as Neville’s eyes tripped and fell onto them.
“Sorry, I nearly forgot. I wanted to get a bunch of each of these to go with the lilacs. Is it okay to pick them up together?”
Neville tore his eyes away from the tortuous flowers. “Of course. I can wrap those with the lilacs in a bouquet and have them ready for you when I call you about the lilacs.” Harry’s face hardened slightly and Neville quickly added, “Or did you have another idea?”
“Is it alright if I just pick them up just as they are? I’d prefer to wrap them at home, if possible.”
“Of course.” Neville returned to his sticky note quickly before looking back up at Harry. “It’s not normal procedure but that’s all good. It’s not as though it’s that much more effort. Less effort actually.”
He watched as Harry breathed out a sigh of relief, thanking him, and felt a keen burst of empathy run through him. Neville shoved the feeling down, down as deep as it could go. If he could have snorted without alerting Harry to his inner turmoil, Neville would have. The irony that he was now burying his emotions when not half an hour earlier, he had been mentally lecturing Harry for doing the same thing was almost enough to make him smile. But then the flowers still lying on his desk shoved their way into his vision as he turned to bid Harry farewell and even the dark humour fled.
With trembling fingers, he picked them up, careful not to damage the delicate petals as Harry’s shadow disappeared back through the entrance. Neville was numb, his heart an aching wound as he placed them back in their proper places. It wasn’t the flowers that had hurt him but, as his hand accidentally slipped on one forget me not, that was hard to remember. Neville watched the baby blue petals float to the ground. A tiny burst of colour against the tarnished dark wood of his floorboards. He stood there until his next customer arrived, staring at the floor.