If someone was to ask James Potter what his biggest regret was, there would be an obvious answer.
He regretted not trying to talk with Regulus a bit harder. Sure, he was never a pushover.
But for the first time in his life, James Potter wished he were. He had fallen in love with the younger brother and his soft looks and smiles he offered him.
It didn’t take him long to fall for the younger Black brother. And Sirius hated it.
He despised the fact that James was making eyes at his younger brother. All was going well.
For a year, Regulus would hang out with his brother and his friends. They would get along just fine.
Regulus hang out with his group of friends too. And Sirius even learned to accept the fact that James loved his younger brother.
And then one day, it all changed. Rumors of Regulus’ Dark Mark started to spread across the school.
James and Sirius didn’t believe them. Not until they saw Regulus walk through the hallway, his face blank of any emotion at all, like a soldier with a mission.
James felt his heart clench in pain at the sight of him. He looked dead inside.
His usually sparkling black eyes were empty. Days passed and Regulus ignored them.
He didn’t even look their way once. Sirius had enough of this after a couple of weeks and pulled Regulus into a hidden hallway with James tagging along.
He took notice of how weak Regulus looked. He didn’t even try to fight Sirius while he dragged him to the dungeons.
“Is it true? Have you taken the Dark Mark?” Sirius had asked him once they stopped.
That was the first time a hint of emotion appeared in the black eyes James loved so much.
He itched to come closer and pull the boy into a hug.
“It has been forced on me.” Regulus responded, his expression still guarded.
James had gasped and Sirius let go of his brother’s arm as if it had burned him.
Regulus’ jaw clenched tightly shut while he waited to see what came next.
“You’re just like them. Walburga and Orion must be proud. Regulus Black, their perfect little snake child.” Sirius spat out and James froze in shock.
He looked to his right to see Sirius’ eyes were full of anger but also tears.
James pulled him back so that he could not touch Regulus and looked at the younger brother who still seemed indifferent.
“It has been forced on me.” Regulus repeated, his heated gaze glued on Sirius who only let out a small chuckle and shook his head.
“I don’t believe you.” He admitted and James gulped.
“Siri- stop!” He growled and Sirius turned to look at him now along with Regulus.
“You should try saying ‘no’ to the Dark Lord and the Death Eaters. See what it feels like.” Regulus whispered and both friends turned to look at him now.
James gulped when he saw the pained expression on Regulus’ face.
“I don’t care. You chose to become a Death Eater. Now you deal with the consequences.” Sirius spat out and dragged James away.
James Potter turned around to see what he never thought he would see.
Regulus Black was staring at him with no hint of any emotion he may have shown a couple of months ago.
The Slytherin rolled his shoulders once and raised his chin, while he watched them walk away. This happened a month ago.
Now, James and Sirius worried more than ever before in their lives. Like James thought, Sirius had regretted his words the following day and went to look for his brother.
But from then on, Regulus was surrounded by his Slytherin friends and he refused to talk to them. Hell, even Pandora looked ready to kill both James and Sirius.
But James never stopped observing the boy who would never know how much he was loved.
James and Sirius both had noticed how agitated the younger Black brother seemed over the next few days.
They didn’t understand why but they would soon. Only six days after their last conversation, Regulus disappeared into thin air.
At first, James assumed he had been sick. But then Remus told them that he hadn’t seen Regulus in the library for a couple of weeks.
Sirius nearly jumped out of his skin at this information. Even when he refused to talk to Sirius and his friends, Regulus never ignored Remus.
The two studied a lot together and talked about books. Regulus could hate them all but he could never hate Sirius’ boyfriend.
Remus was simply too kind to be hated. When a couple more weeks, approximately two months, passed and there was still no sign of Regulus Black, Sirius lost it.
He stormed the library and went straight to Regulus’ friends who looked tired and agitated.
“Where is my brother?” He had asked and James looked like he would jump out of his skin.
He could not even stand still for a single second.
Barty was glaring, Evan had his hand on his shoulder and looked ready to rip Sirius’ head off.
Pandora looked conflicted between telling them the truth and remaining silent. One glare from Barty was enough to shut her up.
“At least tell me if he is okay. Is he safe?” James begged and Pandora gulped and looked at Evan who cleared his throat.
“He hasn’t been safe since Mark was forced on him.” Evan growled, glaring at Sirius the entire time.
Both Sirius and James felt their heart stop. Had Regulus told them the truth back then?
Sirius shook his head and looked at James whose heart had been breaking the entire time.
“That’s right. Regulus told you the truth back then.” Evan said, confirming their suspicion.
“And yet they call us the snakes.” Barty whispered and James turned around, leaving the library quickly.
Once he snapped out of his shock, Sirius began running after him only to find James walking to Dumbledore’s office.
Before he could even reach him, James threw the doors wide open, panting. Sirius moved to stand next to him once they finally reached him.
“Is it true? Was the Dark Mark forced on Regulus?” James asked and Dumbledore hummed.
He leaned back and looked at them both. Sirius grew angry and stepped forward, slapping his hand on his desk.
“Answer the damn question! Was what Regulus said true? Has someone forced the Dark Mark on him?” Sirius yelled, anger clear in his red eyes.
“It is.”
“Who?”
“Not my story to tell.” Dumbledore answered.
“Where is he? Is he alive? Is he in danger?” James begged for an answer.
He was shaking with tears now. Dumbledore remained silent when a letter appeared on his desk.
He picked up the piece of paper and read through it before he looked at both of them again.
“Your brother came to me with the story of what happened to him. I promised to help him if he remained my spy. He agreed. This entire time, your brother has been destroying Dark Lord’s Horcruxes so that you may have a chance at killing him. Today is the last one he destroys.” Dumbledore said and Sirius took a step back from the table, as did James.
It couldn’t be. How had Sirius been so wrong about his brother? Would Regulus have asked him for help if Sirius believed him two months ago? Would Regulus have told him the entire truth?
“Why are you telling us this now?” Sirius asked, suspicious where this was going. Dumbledore sighed and looked at the small paper again.
“Because it seems that your brother found the last one in a cave where Inferni reside. He’s there right now.” Dumbledore said and James let out a tiny sob.
Sirius turned to look at him and his heart broke. He cursed at himself for ever being against James confessing his love to Regulus.
It was so obvious now how besotted he was with him.
Sirius then took two quick steps towards Dumbledore and he snatched the letter from his hand. He recognized his brother’s writing immediately.
‘Professor Dumbledore,
I have done as I promised.
I have found the last Horcrux, Salazar Slytherin’s locket.
I know I might be dead long before this letter reaches you but it will all be worth it if I manage to destroy the locket.
If this letter finds its way to you, the locket has been destroyed and you may now once again have a chance at turning the tides of the war and winning.
When you kill him, let him know that it was I who discovered his secret.
I need him to die knowing I had betrayed him.
Please take care of my brother Sirius, and of the one who never knew how much I loved him, James Potter, when I am gone.
Win the war and end this dark reign over the wizarding world once and for all.
Let my death not be in vain.
R.A.B.’
Sirius had read it out loud and James took a shaky breath before he turned around and began running.
Sirius cursed and followed after him, worried for his other brother. If Regulus really was dead, he could not afford to lose James too.
But the second he left the office, James had disappeared and there was nothing else Sirius could do than go to his boyfriend and ask for help.
How James had understood where Regulus was from that letter he had no idea. But he knew James went running to him.
He couldn’t run to him in life so he would run to him in their death. And Sirius could not allow James to die too.
James only had to hear Salazar Slytherin and cave in one sentence to understand where Regulus had found his locket.
Once he saw the cave, he started running towards it. Screams erupted from the cave and he started running even quicker.
Regulus was still alive. Maybe he would come there in time, he thought.
What he saw once he entered the cave made his blood turn cold.
Regulus was under the water while he fought to stay afloat. Dark gray hands were dragging him under.
James saw his hand go limp and just before it could completely fall under the water, he caught hold of it.
He gripped it tighter than he thought possible and started pulling him out, careful not to step into the water.
He would not let Regulus die. He would not allow him to die like this.
James continued pulling at him and sighed in relief when he saw Regulus’ head emerge above the water. His eyes were closed and he was limp.
Unconscious, James thought to himself and prayed that he had only passed out. He pulled again before he looked down and saw a hand pulling at his leg.
James screamed when he nearly fell. But a hand had taken a hold of his jumper and pulled him out of the water harshly.
James looked back to see Barty pulling on James even harsher once his eyes fell on Regulus. In only a second, James was out of the water and falling on his back.
Barty had no time to catch him since he was currently casting a spell on the inferi. James looked at the unconscious boy laying on top of him and took a shaky breath.
He put a finger at the side of his neck only to sigh in relief when he felt the small pulse.
He gently laid Regulus on the stones and started pressing on his chest and stomach.
He cursed when after a couple of minutes nothing happened and then Regulus started coughing up all the water he had swallowed before falling unconscious again.
“Get up and leave with him, Potter!” Barty yelled while he cast spell after a spell.
“How did you find us?” James asked while he got up and scooped Regulus into his arms.
“Sirius Black brought us the letter with Remus Lupin, demanding to know where you had gone. How he hadn’t realized earlier that you were in Salazar’s cave is beyond me. Remus was instructed to hold him back. You would need a Slytherin to escape here.” Barty spoke quickly and James sniffled and looked down at the Slytherin hero in his arms.
Regulus was taking shallow breaths and shaking.
“Why?” James asked while he tried to take a hold of his hand.
With Regulus in his arms, this proved to be difficult. Barty took notice of this and pointed his palm to the exit of the cave.
Something like a portal opened then and James’ eyes widened.
How powerful was this Slytherin to be able to cast such spells without his wand?
Barty looked at him and smirked, “Would anyone other than a Slytherin be able to cast an Unforgivable? Now go, Potter. I will be there soon enough.” He asked and James’ eyes widened but he continued walking towards the portal.
He stepped through it just in time to hear Barty yell the Unforgivable James thought he would never be able to cast, ‘Avada Kedavra’ he had yelled.
James looked up when the portal closed and saw Sirius running up to him, tears still streaming down his face.
Pandora and Evan ran up too and it was Evan who took Regulus from James so that he could settle him on a bed in the small infirmary they had in Hogwarts.
Only then did James collapse to his knees and put his face in his hands. He felt someone hug him and knew by the smell it was Sirius Black.
“It- it was horrifying, Siri. I- I came there- and they were- they were pulling him under.” James said through tears and he could hear Sirius sobbing too.
No one said anything. Only Barty spoke once Dumbledore entered the room and started healing the younger Black brother.
“Where is Barty?” Evan asked and James said nothing, not being sure of what had happened to him.
“Potter! Where the hell is my boyfriend?” Evan yelled now only for the doors to open again.
Everyone but Dumbledore looked up and Evan took a breath of relief. A tired and sweaty Barty Crouch Jr. walked through the doors.
“Oh thank God!” Evan whispered before he walked past Sirius and James who were still sitting on the floor.
All James could hear was Evan pulling Barty into a hug harshly.
He turned to look at them and saw Barty hug Evan tightly, while he buried his nose into the crook of his neck.
Pandora continued sitting in a chair in the corner of the room. She looked calm on the outside but James knew she was worried sick.
He sniffled and erased his tears, refusing to look at an unconscious Regulus so that he would not break down.
He stood up and started walking towards Pandora. Remus had now helped Sirius stand up and walk to Dumbledore, offering all of the help he needed.
They gasped when they looked at his left forearm.
There were scratches from the Inferi across it but it was so obvious where the Dark Mark was.
Pandora did not look at James even once. Her eyes never left Regulus’ limp form.
“Are you going to break his heart again?” She asked finally, her throat dry from all the crying and lack of water she drank. James frowned and looked at her.
“Excuse me?” He asked and she looked at him now, a small hint of old anger still present in her gray eyes.
“I watched him suffer once because of you and his brother. I will not do so again, Potter.” She said and James gulped. He looked at Regulus and shook his head.
“I will never again hurt him. Nor will I leave his side.” He whispered and she nodded her head and turned to look at Regulus again.
Hours and hours of healing passed but Regulus was still not waking up. James felt his anger levels rise up by each passing second.
This was all the Dark Lord’s fault. Regulus, the love of James’ life, was suffering because of the Dark Lord.
A few more hours passed and Dumbledore had assembled the Order and Regulus’ friends in his office to discuss how to get rid of the Dark Lord.
Barty refused to leave Regulus’ side, saying how if anyone could protect his friend, it would be Barty.
And after what James witnessed, he knew it to be true. Evan promised to tell him all the needed information later on.
And so the planning started.
With Regulus nearly dead, it was hard to know where the Dark Lord was or if he was coming their way.
They had no other spy inside the Death Eater’s headquarters. And then much to everyone’s surprise, only five days later, Kreacher showed up.
Sirius jumped up in his seat when he saw how the elf was glaring at him.
Why did it feel like even Kreacher blamed Sirius for what happened to Regulus?
“Sir Regulus Black asked me to tell you when you were in danger. You are in danger now. The Dark Lord is coming.” Kreacher said before he disappeared.
Dumbledore stood up just in time to hear the first scream come outside.
Everything happened quickly after that, the war started and Barty stayed in the room with Regulus who had woken up a day after he was brought back to Hogwarts.
Regulus made Barty promise not to let anyone know he woke up. His survival had to remain a secret.
After all, now that he was alive, Regulus would not let anyone else kill the Dark Lord. It would be him who put an end to him.
Barty did as Regulus told him to do. It hurt him to lie to Evan too but Regulus wanted him to remain silent and so Barty did as he was asked to do.
Barty listened to the war and battle going on outside while he watched through the window. He could see Evan from there and interfere if needed.
But Evan was strong and smart. He knew how to take care of himself. This didn’t stop Barty from worrying.
He looked a bit to the right to see Pandora and Remus fighting together, back to back.
Regulus stepped out of the bathroom and Barty turned around. He was dressed all in black with a green cloak around his shoulders.
His black hair was loose and nearly until his shoulders. Barty watched his curls move while he looked for his wand.
Once he found him, Regulus took a hold of it in his hand and looked up.
There was a dark look in those dark brown eyes and Barty raised an eyebrow.
“Are you sure you are ready to go to battle?” Barty asked and Regulus glared his way.
“I’ve been dreaming of doing this for far too long. Trust me, I am more than ready.” Regulus said and Barty nodded his head.
He pointed his palm to the wall on his right and a portal opened.
Regulus and Barty stepped through, ending up on the right side of the battlefield.
No one was even coming their way, that was how far they were.
“Kneel before me and I shall spare you all. You are no match to me. Nobody can kill me!” Voldemort yelled through the battlefield.
Regulus could hear his obnoxious laughter and he growled, starting to walk through the battle with Barty behind him, killing any Death Eater that tried to attack Regulus.
“Am I a nobody to you?” Regulus yelled back and watched Voldemort, the Marauders and his own friends turn to look at him in shock.
James was so close to him when Regulus passed him that their shoulders nearly touched.
The battle stopped when the Dark Lord raised his hand.
He watched Regulus step forward. The younger Black brother stopped walking only when he was standing ten feet in front of the Dark Lord.
They all watched the two of them stare at each other and Sirius tried stepping forward but with one move of Barty’s wand, he was pulled back, right into Remus again.
Barty shook his head and put his forefinger over his mouth, motioning for everyone to shut up.
James felt like his heart was going to jump out of his chest. Regulus was alive and well.
And right now, he was standing in front of the one who forced his Dark Mark on him.
Then the two started fighting.
Spell against a spell.
Scratch against a scratch.
Pain after pain.
It went on for a couple of minutes before Regulus growled and used the same Killing Curse Barty used in that cave to save them all.
Slytherins really had no problem using any and every curse when provoked.
“Avada Kedavra!” He yelled and all of them watched Regulus bend over in pain while he held his left forearm.
He bore his Mark, he was supposed to protect him, not stand against him.
They watched the curse hit Voldemort. And then they watched him turn to flames, then to ash, and then the ashes disappeared.
Regulus straightened his back then and cheering started. The Death Eaters started running away while Hogwarts celebrated.
Barty stepped beside Regulus while the younger Black brother turned towards him.
James could see his face again now. How pretty could he be after just winning them the war?
Regulus had rolled up the sleeve on his left hand and then he tugged the bandages off his forearm.
James watched Regulus’ tears well up in his eyes while he looked at Barty, then at Evan and Pandora who had all come to stand with him, with the friend they all believed from the beginning.
This was something James Potter and Sirius Black failed to do all those months ago.
They would not fail now. Never again would they fail Regulus Black.
Regulus smiled then, a sad and happy smile at the same time.
“It’s gone. It’s gone.” he whispered through tears and then he looked down to his forearm again.
James understood now. The Dark Mark he was forced to take was gone with the Dark Lord.
Pandora Lovegood was the first one to throw herself at a tired Regulus. Tired but alive.
Regulus had let out a chuckle but he hugged her nonetheless.
James took notice of how he stumbled back a step.
Pandora must have noticed it too because she immediately let go of him, apologizing while she did so.
Evan was glaring at Regulus who was only smiling at him.
Regulus knew him too well to think Evan was actually mad with him.
“If you scare us like that again, Reg, I will make it my personal goal to cockblock you and Potter for the rest of your lives.” Evan threatened with a finger pointing at a red faced Regulus.
James took a step forward but stopped when he saw Sirius walking towards his brother.
Other wizards had started cleaning up the mess and taking care of the injured and their dead.
“Reggie?” Sirius called and James saw how Regulus tensed up immediately.
Sirius must have noticed it too judging by the way he hung his head low and took a deep breath.
Regulus finally turned to look at his brother with Evan already glaring and Barty holding his wand, ready to attack.
Pandora stood a bit closer to Regulus, ready to hold him if he exploded. James noticed how the four of them knew each other so well.
“You called me their perfect snake child.” Regulus said and Sirius closed his eyes.
Remus, who had been standing beside him, immediately glared at him.
He knew they fell apart but he never knew why or who was to blame hence why he continued to hang out with Regulus in the library.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I thought- I don’t know what I thought but I am sorry.” Sirius explained, finally meeting Regulus’ eyes.
Regulus took a deep breath and told his friends to stand down before he began walking towards his brother.
James only stood a bit further away and watched to see if Regulus would forgive him.
Maybe if he did, he could forgive James too then.
“I know you are, Siri. Just- promise me that if something like this ever happens again, you will hear me out. You will believe me.” Regulus said and gulped while he waited.
Sirius immediately nodded his head.
“Of course, I’m sorry. I’m so terribly sorry, Reggie.” Sirius said before he dared step forward and he pulled him into a tight hug.
Regulus froze for a second and Barty stepped forward before he was pulled back by Evan who shook his head.
James watched Regulus hug him back before the two brothers started crying together.
Remus watched them with a small smile on his face, glad that he would not have to hide his friendship with Regulus anymore.
A couple of minutes passed before they separated. Sirius looked at his brother before they were interrupted by Remus coughing.
They both turned to look at him when Remus pointed at where James was standing.
Sirius heard Regulus gasp before he gulped. He looked at his brother to finally see emotion there, the same emotion James has shown since the beginning.
Longing and love.
So much of it that it made Sirius feel nauseated to just look at them like that.
James watched Barty walk up to Regulus before he put his hand on his shoulder.
Regulus turned to look at him and watched Barty speak.
“I may not like him but you should give him a chance. He came to the cave the second he found out the truth. I saw him nearly die himself, pulling you out of the water, Reg.” Barty had said and Regulus’ eyes widened at the sudden revelation.
Sure, before he passed out underwater, he felt someone take a hold of him and try to pull him up.
But he did not even think of it being James who ran into the cave after him. Regulus turned to look at James and he gulped.
He looked at Sirius then who only nodded his head, telling him it was okay.
How could he be the one to separate them? It made no sense.
Not when they obviously loved each other so much.
Not when Regulus just saved the entire wizarding world from complete destruction.
Regulus started walking.
James did not move, choosing to let Regulus decide how much distance they should keep between each other.
But once Regulus was standing three feet before him, he lost control of his own tongue.
“I’m so sorry about everything. I’ll never forgive myself for what we did to you. I’ll never forgive myself for not trying to talk to you once more.” James spoke and Regulus gulped and closed his eyes, clearly remembering his not so fond memories. James cursed at himself again.
“It’s okay. I understand. I accept your apology. But if you or Sirius do this to me again, I will not hesitate to unleash Barty on you both.” Regulus whispered and looked up at James.
James gasped in surprise when he saw the familiar brown eyes, staring at him with certain light and softness in them again.
Then he looked behind him to see Barty who had clearly heard Regulus' threat.
He had one of his arms over Evan's shoulders. And another one was raised in the air to wave at James while he smiled.
James gulped and Barty smirked, loving the fact that he made Gryffindors uncomfortable.
“I’m in love with you. I have been in love with you since you first came to Hogwarts. I’m sorry I never told you before. But I- I want you to know that I am desperately, deeply and obsessively in love with you. I don’t expect you to return my feelings, I just-” James started rambling and Regulus let out a small chuckle.
“James, you are rambling.” Regulus spoke with a smile on his face.
James stopped talking immediately, blushing when he heard Regulus call him by his first name.
Happiness looked good on Regulus, he thought.
Regulus took a step closer and James felt his breath hitch immediately.
“And for your information, I am in love with you too. I have been since I came to this stupid school.” Regulus said and James took a breath of relief, finally relaxing his shoulders.
He wished he could pull him into a kiss right then and there. But Regulus was tired and weak from the fight for survival.
And James did not really want to push Sirius to his limits by kissing his brother in front of him. James took another step closer and leaned down.
He cupped Regulus’s face and tilted his head upwards, watching for any sign of discomfort or dislike on Regulus’s face.
When he found none, he leaned down and planted an affectionate kiss on his forehead.
Regulus smiled and hugged him immediately afterwards. James smiled when he heard Regulus’ friends start whistling and cheering.
He looked past Regulus’ shoulder to see them all smiling at them and Sirius pretending to throw up.
He could still see the fond look in his best friend’s eyes.
Remus was beside Sirius, shaking his head at him in exasperation but sending James a thumbs up.
James took a small breath of relief again.
The war was over.
Regulus Black had survived and killed Voldemort, becoming the War Hero James always believed he could be, even in the time-period when they didn't talk.
Regulus Black was the love of James Potter’s life.
He was his light and stars and James was holding him in his arms now.
Alive and breathing.
Alive and happy.
He smiled as he realized that they actually had a shot at happiness together.
James Potter would never again do anything to jeopardize it.
Losing Regulus Black once was more than enough for him.
He would never lose him again.