Christmas Break was something Marlene loved, she got to spend time with her family in Scotland, the siblings that graduated, and the new niblings that came during her time at Hogwarts.
It was a warm and festive time that she got to enjoy in the middle of a stressful year.
Of course every family had her ups and downs, but going home had an invigorating effect on her. Maybe because she adored to be the favourite aunt, or maybe because she was still pretty much a daddy’s girl, even nearing her 16th birthday, but she found it special and it replenished the battery for her to go back and face the fuckery that was Hogwarts pureblood population.
She had spent her day with her friends, unpacking, catching up, promising herself that she wouldn’t be one of those people that would change as soon as she had a boyfriend.
Were they even in a relationship?
She assumed they were, but they never said anything clear in that regard, and she had pushed Sirius enough to date, she didn’t want to push more than that.
At least not yet.
It didn’t dawn on her, until she entered the Common Room, that Winter Break wasn’t as thrilling for everyone else as it was to her.
While she was bubbly and eager to talk about Lily’s new neighbour, and Mary’s fling, Sirius was sitting alone, near the fireplace, just staring at the fire, like all his energy had been taken in a swift of a wand.
It wasn’t that she didn’t look for him earlier, he had been with James and the boys. She had seen him laugh, they shared a few moments with all the friend group, together. But now, in the almost empty Common Room, Sirius looked depleted, even sad.
Something that didn’t agree with Marlene at that moment.
She excused herself from the girls, so that they could catch up when she went out to bed, which both Lily and Mary knew would be rather late, or not happen at all. However, they understood as Marlene went to sit next to Sirius.
“Hullo love, something on your mind?” she said, making herself fit in the space between Sirius and his arm.
Sirius, who was mostly energetic, barely moved as she adjusted. He was still reliving some of the things that happened at home, wondering how it got to that. Even if he hated the bastards now it didn’t used to be like that, he remembered once liking being at Grimmauld, but now… the constant struggle just to have a normal conversation, the repetitive standards he had to fulfil even when he didn’t want or care for them, chipped away at his tough exterior and the child inside that just wanted his parents to see him for who he was and not what they wanted him to be.
He tried to play it down, to make it seem like he didn’t care, that he was just a Gryffindor, brave through and through, but some nights, like that one, it was simply too much for a 16th year old to carry with the burden of the world.
They stayed like that for a few moments, it was odd that they weren’t bickering or snogging, just sitting there, watching the fire burn. Not a word to be said, just the crackling of the wood and the distant buzz of the few people still in the Common Room getting ready to go to their dorms.
“If one day I decided to leave, would you run away with me?”
It startled Marlene when he spoke, it was softer than anything that he ever said to her, but it spoke louder than many of the things that he said.
She looked at his hollowed eyes, usually there was a spark of mischief behind them, but not at the moment. All she could see was rage and hopelessness. It broke her.
“That depends, do we bring you emotional support boyfriend with us? I feel you wouldn’t last a day without James.” it was an attempt at teasing, maybe to bring him back from the darkness, maybe to just distract him from the intrusive thoughts.
A small smile appeared on Sirius' left side, it was tiny but it was progress.
He had to give it to her, she had a great way to bring him back to himself, to remind him that there were people that see something more in him than an heir and a way to carry on with the family's delusional ideas.
“He is the one dependent on me, the poor bloke already ditched his girlfriend. I think he’s gonna propose soon, do you think I should do my nails for the occasion?”
“Oi! No one is going to propose to my boyfriend, that’s weird!” she laughed, not realising what she said, just happy that he wasn’t brooding anymore.
“Boyfriend?” He asked after a few moments, not sure if he heard her right, they never discussed it, they never talked much, they mostly snogged, but he guessed that after almost 3 months of that they needed to be more than just a fling.
“I… oh… we don’t have to… I mean I thought we were there but if…” she stumbled, she didn’t want to pressure him into this, they were supposed to be having fun, just teenagers, even if she wanted more she would rather be slow than nothing.
She was about to defend herself some more, to explain that they didn’t have to, that things could be the same way as they had before. But her lips failed her on the account that Sirius’ lips were on top of hers at the moment.
They weren’t forceful, they weren’t trying to take more than they were given, but they were firm and she found herself relaxing a bit.
“I’ll go break up with James in a bit, I’ve got a girl now, can’t make her jealous.” he smirked at her, making McKinnon roll her eyes.
“Like I would be jealous of him, I’ve got a better sense of style. Quidditch jerseys can only do so much.” she joked, and Sirius laughed, that wonderful loud and contagious laugh.