In Many Forms

The Saturday after their first week of school all the first-year Hufflepuffs slept in late, because at midnight on the previous Friday they’d had their first Astronomy class, paired with Slytherin. 

After sitting in the dark Astronomy tower and gazing at the stars for an hour, they’d all been rightfully sleepy. Anna had sat propped against a wall in the Astronomy Tower classroom. Despite the chill that swept through the open tower, Anna felt too warm. 

After a while of Professor Sinistra’s lecturing about the different turns and dials of their telescopes, Cedric had yawned and laid his head on Anna’s shoulder. She’d turned and pressed her cheek to the cool stone behind her. They sat like that quietly, sleepily, until the class dismissed. 

The Slytherins and Hufflepuffs had all shuffled down to the dungeons for some much-needed sleep.

The following morning Anna woke to a sliver of sunlight in her eyes. Her blankets were a mess, like she’d kicked them off sometime in the night. The bedroom was normally pretty warm, but that morning it felt downright stuffy inside her four-poster bed. 

Moving aside the curtains of her bed, Anna saw that Patricia and Theo were still asleep. It was only the second time since they’d arrived at school that her roommates hadn’t woken her with their bickering. 

Anna shuffled about the room, changing out of her pyjamas. She hissed quietly when she ran her knee into the edge of her trunk. Theo mumbled something and turned over in her sleep. Anna bit her lip, fished a pair of trainers from her the bottom of the trunk, and tiptoed barefoot out to the common room. 

A few older students milled about the room, reading or chatting. Anna pulled at the collar of her sweater, feeling a bit suffocated in it. It was arguably her softest and most comfortable sweater, so she wasn’t sure that the sweater itself was causing the nervous, flighty feeling she was experiencing now. 

“Morning!” An older boy smiled at her as he walked up to the bulletin board and began tacking up a roll of parchment. “How was your first week?” 

Anna blinked a couple times before his face jumped out in her memory. She perked up when she recognised him as the Prefect who had shown them to the dorms on their first night. 

“Not bad. I only overslept once.” The tag of her sweater scratched horribly against the back of her neck. Anna suppressed the urge to rip it off. 

Christian laughed and placed a pin at the bottom of the parchment roll to keep it open. “Won’t be the last time that happens, trust me. I like to get ahead on my sleeping in Binns’ class. Helps a lot with waking up the next day.” 

Anna chuckled halfheartedly. “I’ll give that a try.” 

Christian finished pinning the parchment and Anna finally got a good look at the notice he’d put up. 

“Broom Flight class?” she asked. 

Christian glanced down at her. “Yup. It’s mandatory for first-years. It’s only once a week though, so it’s not too bad. Looks like you lot will be having your first lesson Monday afternoon.” 

“And…what do we do in that class?” 

He laughed as if that was a silly question. “Flying, of course.” 

“Flying?!” 

Flying. Just the thought of it was petrifying. Though, not quite as terrifying as the realisation that she would have to sit on an uncomfortable broom handle for several hours. 

Anna arrived at the Monday afternoon Broom Flight class with sweaty hands twisted in the sleeves of her scratchy-feeling robes. Cedric had a reassuring arm over her shoulders as they walked, but the tension never left her spine. 

The Broom Flight training grounds were really just a vast, grassy courtyard at the north end of the castle. Cedric had no trouble steering them in the right direction. First-year Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors filed into the courtyard alongside each other. 

Standing near one end of the training grounds was a woman in long black robes trimmed with silver. On the ground in front of her were two lines of broomsticks, the handle ends facing each other. The woman blew the whistle that hung from a thin chain around her neck. 

"Welcome to your first flying lesson. I am Madam Hooch." She surveyed the gaggle of kids in front of her and set her hands on her hips. "Let's hop to it. Everyone step up to the left side of a broom and hold your right hand over it." 

Everyone rushed to claim a broomstick and stand next to their friends. Anna dragged her feet a bit, even as Cedric dragged her along. Her skin itched faintly where he held her wrist and she tried not to yank her arm away. 

The broom on the ground at Anna's right looked like it had come out of a Halloween cartoon. The bristles were made of small switches of wood and the handle was bent and knotted in places. Just as she'd feared, there was no seat on the broom aside from a shallow curve in the handle where she supposed her bum would sit. 

Cedric looked much more excited than she was feeling. He grinned at her and eagerly stuck his hand out over the broom, waiting for further instructions. He'd been rambling all weekend how thrilled he was for Flying class to start. Apparently he had a broom back home that he liked to fly. 

The broom Anna had at home most definitely did not fly. 

"Very good!" said Madam Hooch. "Now picture the broom coming to your hand and say 'up.'" 

"Up." Anna said to her broom. She'd been picturing it just like Madam Hooch said but the broom did little more than wobble in its spot. 

"Up!" Cedric's broom flew immediately into his hand. He looked to Anna with a massive grin. It was clear he was enjoying himself and she hated to spoil his fun, so she smiled as convincingly as she could and tried again. 

"Up!" she shouted. The broom bucked away from the grass for a moment but clattered back down. 

"Up!" she kept trying. And trying. And trying. 

Finally, on her sixth attempt, the broomstick jumped up from the ground, albeit a tad reluctantly, and smacked into her waiting hand. And for the first time since she’d read the notice on the bulletin board, Anna felt relief. It didn’t last long. 

“Wonderful!” said Madam Hooch. “Now that we all have our brooms, go ahead and mount them. Be sure to remain on the ground until we are all situated.” 

Anna swung a leg over the broom, feeling a bit silly. A spark of doubt lit in the back of her mind. What if brooms couldn’t actually fly and this was some trick organised by the older students? It was certainly something the older kids at All Saints would have done. 

“Alright, on my whistle, you will kick off from the ground, hover for a moment, then lean forward to touch back down.” 

Madam Hooch lifted the silver whistle to her lips and blew a shrill note. 

Despite her doubts, Anna jumped and, to her surprise, remained in the air. The broom was as uncomfortable to sit on as she’d imagined but she was really doing it, she was flying. 

The broom quivered beneath her like an unsteady bicycle and Anna clutched tighter to the handle, leaning closer to it. She lurched forward. 

The handle of her broom knocked into the broom of the Gryffindor girl hovering in front of her, who shrieked as they both went spiralling. 

Faces blurred in front of her. Anna was thrown flat against her broomstick handle. Yellow and red robes swirled around her and the grass grew further away. She clung on to the broom for dear life and prayed it would run out of magic. 

“Miss you need to land!” Madam Hooch called over the shouts of the other students. 

“How?!” 

A flash of red streaked by. 

“Boys! Ground your brooms immediately!” 

With a neck-twisting lurch Anna’s broom came to a stop. She would have gone flying off her perch if not for the hand one of the Weasley twins had on her arm. She felt queasy. 

“You alright?” he asked. 

“That’s a pretty advanced manoeuvre you were attempting there,” the other laughed. He was holding the handle of her broom, keeping her hovering steady in the air. “Might wanna save that one for the Quidditch pitch.” 

“Help her down!” Madam Hooch called from the ground. 

Anna glanced down to find their teacher. They were easily a hundred feet in the air. The measly lunch she’d had earlier threatened to come back up. 

Muggy air ruffled her hair as the boys guided her broom into a descent. 

“Oh god,” Anna groaned and squeezed her eyes shut. 

The twins laughed but their grip on her was firm and the one holding her arm rubbed his thumb back and forth over her bicep. “We’ve got you,” he whispered. 

Anna didn’t open her eyes until her feet touched the grass. She stumbled away from the broom. Her shaky knees sent her knocking into the twin still holding her arm. 

“Anna!” 

Suddenly Cedric was there, throwing down his broom and taking her face in his hands. His palms were sweaty. It didn’t feel good on her skin. But then, nothing had felt good on her skin the past few days. 

“Are you okay?” he asked. “You look green.” 

Anna shook her head, not trusting herself to open her mouth and speak without throwing up. 

“Mr. Weasley and Mr. Weasley, well done.” Madam Hooch rushed over in a flurry of robes. “And Miss—what’s your name, dear?” 

Cedric let got of Anna’s face and stepped aside. Though, he kept a hand on her shoulder. 

Anna swallowed thickly and forced her nausea down. “Anna…Alsaint, ma’am.” 

“Miss Alsaint, we’ll need to work on your landings.” The teacher sighed. “Why don’t you sit for a moment, get your legs back under you.” 

Anna looked up to see the whole class staring. Her face flushed. She nodded gratefully at Madam Hooch. 

“You three, please stay with her. Everyone else, let’s practice our takeoffs and landings. One at a time!” 

Cedric, Fred, and George guided Anna a little ways across the courtyard and sat her down against a wall. She leaned back against the cool stone and breathed. 

“What happened back there?” Cedric asked quietly. 

“Dunno,” she mumbled, her eyes closed tight, cheek pressed to the rough brick. 

“I think it’s called the twirling Hippogriff,” one of the twins said. 

“Yeah, it was in the Quidditch Times a couple months ago.” 

“Advanced stuff.” 

“Can’t you two be serious for once?” Cedric snapped at the twins. 

“Stand down, Ced. They’re only joking.” Anna peeled her eyes open, finally feeling a little more steady in her bones. 

“Are you okay?” He squeezed her hand in both of his. 

“Yeah.” She nodded and turned to the red-haired boys in front of her. “Thanks…for saving me from embarrassing myself even more.” 

“All in a day’s work.” 

Anna gave the twins a grateful, wobbly smile. 

The remainder of Flying class was less eventful. Anna made sure to apologise to the Gryffindor girl she’d sent into a tailspin, and she did eventually learn how to land properly, though she was still shaky on her broom. 

On Tuesday Anna woke up late, drenched in sweat, feeling suffocated by the heat of the room. She skipped breakfast in favour of a cold shower before class. Nobody really blinked an eye about her missing the meal. 

On Wednesday Anna didn’t show up for lunch. After spending Herbology chocking on the stuffy air in greenhouse one, she hadn’t been in the mood to sit around and chat. At one o’clock Cedric met her in their Defence Against the Dark Arts with a questioning look. She didn’t acknowledge it for fear she’d snap at him. 

On Thursday Anna didn’t show up to any meals. The mere idea of food was nauseating to her. She’d woken later than usual, and in a downright nasty mood. Everything felt too bright, too loud, too irritating on each of her senses. She managed to focus well enough in morning Transfiguration. She’d staggered back to her room after class and slept through lunch. When she met Cedric in the dungeons for double Potions, he looked concerned. He asked if she was alright. Anna brushed off the question and went about setting up her cauldron. 

After two excruciatingly long hours of Potions, Anna trudged back to her dorm and collapsed on her unmade bed. She hadn’t meant to sleep through dinner, but when she woke later that night and saw her roommates also in bed, she was too tired to even be concerned. 

Cedric, however, was not too tired. 

On Friday Cedric was waiting for her outside of the girls dormitory. 

Anna had woken up late, well past breakfast time, but not so late that she’d miss Herbology, which started at 11. She felt so drained, even after sleeping well over twelve hours, that she wasn’t sure she would be able to make it to Astronomy later that night. Not only that, but each brush of her robes on her skin sent a sickening quiver up her spine. 

“You missed breakfast again.” Cedric greeted her with crossed arms and a stern expression.

Anna rubbed a fist against her eye. “I slept in.” 

“You missed all the meals yesterday.” 

“I…wasn’t hungry.” 

“Well you must be hungry now. Here.” From a side table he picked up a plate loaded with eggs, toast, and sausage, and shoved it in her hands. 

Her stomach twisted. “I’m not hungry, Ced.” She set the plate back down and wiped off a bit of grease on her pant leg. 

“That’s rubbish,” Cedric spat. “What’s going on?” 

“Nothing.”

Cedric was quiet, his arms still crossed over his face and his eyebrows drawn together. There was a wild look in his eye.  

“Either you tell me or I’ll tell the teachers.” 

Anna gaped at him. 

“I’m serious. I don’t think I’ve seen you properly eat even once. You’re tired all the time, and to be honest the ghosts look more lively than you do right now.” 

“Ouch,” Anna mumbled. She knew she probably looked a bit off from how exhausted she was, but that was a low blow. 

Cedric sighed and stepped forward, taking her shoulders in his hands. Her skin crawled. 

“I’m not trying to be mean. Hey,” he gripped her chin and made her look into his eyes, “I’m worried about you. You look ill, let me help. Please?” 

Anna’s lip wobbled and she let her head drop to Cedric’s shoulder. The fabric of his robes scratched her skin but she was too tired to flinch from the sensation. Her tears soaked his robes. The exhaustion had settled so deep into her bones that she hadn’t known she was barely holding herself up until Cedric gave her the space to collapse. 

He held her while she cried into his shoulder and let herself break. After her sobs turned to sniffles, Cedric asked again. 

“What’s been going on?” 

“I don’t know,” she mumbled, her cheek pressed to the tear-soaked spot on his robes. 

“What d’you mean?” Cedric asked. 

“I…I must be sick or something.” 

“You do feel like you’re burning up.” Cedric rubbed her back in soothing circles, which Anna appreciated immensely, even if the motion only further irritated her heated skin. 

“It’s not like a cold. I’ve never felt like this before. It—it’s horrible. Looking at food makes me want to be sick, the heat of my room is suffocating, all my clothes feel scratchy. My whole body just feels wrong and I want to scream all the time.” Anna rubbed her cheek, now itchy with dried tears, against Cedric’s shoulder. 

“Maybe you should go to the hospital wing,” he suggested gently. 

“I don’t like the hospital,” she mumbled into his shoulder. 

“I’ll come with you, it’ll be alright. Besides, wizard medicine is pretty different from how muggles do it.” 

Anna lifted her head. “How d’you know that?” 

“My dad told me about it. Though some of the stuff he said had to be fake.” Cedric’s nose wrinkled. “I mean there’s no way muggles cut into people thinking it’ll cure them.” 

For the first time in days, Anna cracked a smile. “They do cut into people, and it does cure them…most of the time.” 

Cedric stared at her like she’d grown a second head. “That’s mental. Why would—no, I don’t wanna know. Let’s just get you to the hospital wing.” He began to steer Anna towards the exit, but she dug in her heels. 

“Wait,” Anna protested. “Let me wash my face quickly. I’m sure I look like a mess.” 

“You don’t,” Cedric assured her. “But alright. I’ll wait here.” 

Anna mumbled a grateful thanks and hurried off down the girls’ hall. The shared bathroom was closer than her bedroom so she ducked in there. Thankfully it was empty since mostly everyone had gone to class by now. 

She turned on the tap and let cold water flow over her hands. There was always something soothing in the gentle churning of water. Anna scooped up the frigid water in both hands and splashed it across her face. Hopefully some of the redness from crying would fade by the time she got to class. 

After splashing her face a few more times, she reluctantly turned off the tap and glanced into the mirror. Her eyes were red, so was her nose, and on her ashen face her cheeks looked puffy. Anna couldn’t recall a time when she’d looked worse. 

Sighing, she wiped away a dribble of water that was ready to fall from her chin. A sudden cramp hit her side. She gasped, wet fingers clutching the counter as the pain threatened to topple her.

The sharpness of the pain faded quickly, leaving a burning ache in its stead. Anna wobbled on her feet and looked up into the mirror. Her eyes looked wild, nearly unrecognisable to herself. As the seconds wore on, the pain dulled to a gnawing itch and Anna gathered herself enough to go find Cedric. 

A hint of fear lingered in her flesh.