Now That We Don´t Talk
Regulus POV:
What was he thinking? Why did it occur to him that going to St. Mungo´s Hospital was a promising idea? Well now standing in the bathroom right before James, it seemed like the worst idea ever. Both of them just stood there looking at each other. Regulus noticed the red pullover James was wearing. He stole it once while they were together. He also rememberd how comfy it was. James’s hair was also a little longer than the last time they saw each other. It looked good on hum. Regulus has always liked longer hair. Other than that Regulus head was completely empty. What was he supposed to say in a situation like this? ´Oh hey James, heard your wife was killed tonight. My condolences by the way. How are you? Do you think we have a chance now? ´ wasn’t really the right thing to say. As if running into your ex wasn´t awkward enough, running into him just hours after his wife died was ten times worse. “ What…what are you doing here?” James asked suddenly. He had lowered his wand and had to put into his trousers pocket. Simple question you would think, but Regulus just didn´t have an answer. What was he doing here?
After Dumbledore visited him, he had the sudden urge to see James. And when he got an owl with a letter from his brother Sirius, in which he said he would go to the St. Mungo´s hospital with his boyfriend Remus to visit James, he did the only sane thing in that situation. He Apparated to the Hospital. Looking back, it didn´t seem so sane anymore. Back then it was probably the alcohol, but now that he had sobered up a little he had started to think clearer again.
After he appeared in the halls, he realised he didn´t even know in what room James was. So, he just wandered around, drinking a bottle of water to sober up. Until suddenly he saw James. Coming his direction. And he panicked. What was he supposed to say? James was distracted by his son and didn´t see his former boyfriend, so Regulus used the opportunity and hid in the bathroom. Just to realise that’s where James was headed. He planned to hide in the stall until James was gone. But then everything just went perfectly not according to plan. He tripped and fell onto the toilet, which of course broke. At least that was fixed by a spell. But certainly, there wasn´t a spell for this kind of situation.
“Well…you know…what is anyone doing anywhere? It´s a crazy world, right” Regulus stammered followed by an awkward laugh. But James didn´t seem to have any of that. He just stared at Regulus with an empty face.
“No, I´m sorry. That was weird. Uhm…Sirius send me an owl, just to let me know where he is. And I just wanted to check up on you…I am sorry about Lily. I know what a great woman she was. It must be hard for you” Honesty is probably still the right thing.
“Oh” James said. Quiet. His expression went from serious to sad. Regulus knew it. It was James I´m-about-to-cry-but-I-don´t-want-to face. “Tha…thank you Reggie…” his voice shaking until it cracked, and he broke into uncontrollable sobs. Tears started streaming down his face.
“Oh James…” Regulus closed the distances between him and James in a few steps and pulled into a hug. Or as best as he could, James still had his son on his arm. “It´s okay. Let it all out. Just breath. You should use a tissue. Here let me take Harry” Regulus didn´t realised what he just suggested until he was suddenly standing alone, Harry on his arm. Who was sucking on his left thumb, looking at him out of big green eyes.
It was the first time he held a baby. Like ever. He normally avoided the little fuckers. He was sure he wasn´t good with kids. With his family history he never learned how to handle a child without traumatising them. Well, he knew what not to do, to not fuck him up like his parents did. But that was really the bare minimum.
Snorting sounds filled the room and Regulus looked up at James. He was standing next to the sink, throwing a tissue into the bin. His eyes were still teary and red.
“Uhm Reggie, it was nice, but I think need to get back to my room. Padfoot and Moony are probably already worried” James explained and took Harry from Regulus arms.
“Oh yeah sure…. Uhm maybe don’t mention to my brother I was here? I mean he doesn´t know about our past relationship so it might be weird to him that I came here…” Regulus suggested.
“Yeah…that’s probably for the best. Well, I guess see you” James said, took the bag from the floor and left the bathroom without another word.
That was probably the worst social interaction Regulus ever had. He really needed to work on his social skills. And he needed to stop making decisions when he was drunk.
He stumbled a few steps backwards and bumped against the wall.Being left alone in the quiet bathroom now was weird. What was he supposed to do? Go to another bar and get drunk? No, that would be the worst thing to do right now. Maybe he could visit one of his friends? No, they were all were probably sleeping and he didn´t want to wake them.
Even though it didn´t sound as intriguing, it would probably for the best if he just went home. Where it would be quite and lonely as well. At least there he couldn´t really do anymore dumb decisions. So, he Apparated to his apartment. Where it was, just as expected, quiet and lonely.