Harry, Ron, and Hermione walked into the cosy Gryffindor common room. The fire crackled while the room buzzed with students coming in and out.
Hermione plopped herself on the oversized red couch, closest to the fireplace. She didn’t hide her disapproving glare as her large library book fell open in her lap with a soft thud.
“I hate to be the person who told you so, Harry… But I don’t think this is a good idea.” She sang before she buried her nose in the book.
Ron sat on the opposite end of the couch before giving Harry an apprehensive look that made him almost regret agreeing to this whole ordeal in the first place.
Harry sat himself down at the coffee table, percolating in suspense. He watched the fire dance upon the logs.
“Well then,” Fred smiled as he walked into the common room. “Shall we?” Sitting himself across from Harry.
“Yeah, okay.’ Harry said, trying to cover up the uneasiness bubbling inside him with a smile.
Fred pulled out his chessboard and they had began to set up. Harry tried to ignore the fact that George was giving him a knowing smirk as he also sat himself on the couch between Ron and Hermione.
“So, Ron tells me you’re not bad at chess.” Fred began to prod.
“I'm not half bad, but I’m not great either.” Harry shrugged, suspecting more than ever that Fred was definitely up to something.
“Always so modest?” Fred winked.
When Harry did not answer, George leaned in.
“C’mon, relax! Why is everyone so uptight?” Fred commented as he eyed Ron and Hermione.
Harry ignored the question once more, as he had already gotten two of Fred's pawns.
“Not bad at all, ‘Arry.” Fred complimented.
The Saturday afternoon wore on. With another one of Fred’s knights defeated, Fred piped up. “I reckon we strike up a deal.”
“What sort of deal?” Harry asked sceptically while almost glaring between Fred and George.
“We’re glad you asked.” The both chimed in unison, smirking wildly at each other.
Hermione scoffed. “Honestly.”
_______
Harry stood in front of the dungeon door with a large envelope in his hands.
“Well, go on then. I almost feel bad for you, you know. Except that you agreed to do this. Pity that you lost, really.” Hermione clucked.
“Sorry, mate. You did shake on it.” Ron shrugged as he offered a pat on his shoulder.
“Right.” Harry took a deep breath before stepping forward. He gingerly gave a small knock at the door, which resulted in an answer of a familiar, drawling voice.
“Enter.” And the door creaked open.
Harry didn’t bother to look back; he had somehow mustered some sort of determination in his step as he approached the desk of one of the most loathed professors that taught at Hogwarts, Severus Snape. Neither he or Harry were fond of each other, which was probably the only thing they both had in common.
Harry stood in what was either disbelief or denial in front of Snape’s desk. The only sound that crawled between them was the sound of a quill scratching on parchment, making Harry’s heart slam against his chest. His palms began to slightly sweat as he waited for the inevitable to happen.
“Why, if it isn’t our famous little cel-bri-ty.” Snape's unwavering tone made Harry clench his teeth. Not bothering to glance up at him, he continued to violate a student's paper with red ink.
“What do you want, Potter?” Snape’s lips curled in disgust.
“I… I was hoping you could look at this. And consider… signing… it.”
Snape let out an exasperated sigh as he placed the quill in the ink bottle and looked up at Harry. His odious black eyes darted from his desk to Harry.
“And what is ‘this’ that I am looking at?”
Harry clenched the file in his hands as he reluctantly handed it to Snape. If it was not for Snape basically prying it out of his hands, Harry wouldn’t have let go.
Harry watched, almost in horror, as Snape opened the envelope and pulled out the papers.
Snapes’ face remained unreadable as he looked at the papers.
“Is this… some… sort of joke, Potter?” Snape questioned evenly, looking up from the papers.
“Umm… no.” Potter lied. He wanted to throw up.
“Adoption papers?” Snape spat as he slammed the papers on his desk.
“Y-Yes…” he stammered.
“Yes?”
“Sir.” Harry added.
There was a quiet exchange between the two of them.
“I-I was hoping….” Harry began.
“I was hoping that if you signed those papers… I could call you….”
He took a deep breath and slammed his eyes shut.
“That I could call you Sn… ‘Snaddy’.” Harry blurted.
It was only Harry’s daring nature that made him open his eyes to look at Snape. Snape’s mouth was slightly open in disbelief, which quickly evolved into a sneer.
“You think this is funny, Potter?” Snapes’ voice got dangerously low and quiet.
“No.”
Snapes' chair scraped on the stone floor as he glided around his desk. “You think I would adopt the son of James Potter, and take care of someone else’s pompous brat?!” Snape's face was now only inches from his. He was so close that Harry could smell the sour coffee assaulting his nostrils.
“Forget it.” Harry tried to sound disappointed as he took a step back and shoved his hands into his pockets. He looked down, doing his best to look as if he had much remorse and regret.
“Get. Out.” Snape snarled.
“We could be happy, y’know.’ Harry offered, trying to hold back a smile. Harry did not know what was making him say it, perhaps it was the revolt displayed on Snapes face. It was pure bliss.
“I’ve gotten good at using the cooker! I’m also not half bad at making pancakes, and bacon isn’t too hard to handle either. Aunt Petunia is very particular. Just think, we could spend Saturday morning eating in front of the telly together.” Harry tried to say optimistically.
Harry continued to take advantage of the silence threading between them once more.
“I also wouldn’t send you to a retirement home; I’ll take care of you.” Harry tried to say it gently, but there was a slight bite in his words.
“Out!” Snape snarled as he pointed his finger at the door.
“Or if you prefer, we could at least find a nice retirement home, yknow?” It took all of Harry’s self control to not laugh.
Snape could see that Potter was enjoying this a bit too much.
“You can tell your ‘friends’ that their idea of being funny, and clever has gotten you a week's worth of detention, Potter!” Whispering as he leaned closer to Harry again.
“Alright, then. That should give you enough time to at least think about it, then?” Harry quipped.
“Not, even in the slightest.” Snape snapped.
“Oh… I see, that does put a damper on my… hopes. I understand though. Thank you for your time, Professor.” Harry said sadly with a nod.
Harry turned around, he was finally able to let himself smile as he walked slowly toward the door. Suddenly, Harry felt a blazing hot sting on his backside, causing him to yelp in surprise.
“Get. Out.” He heard Snape hiss as Harry hurled himself out of the dungeon, barely containing his mirth.
_____
Snape had paced in-front of his desk later that evening. He had been practically fuming since the visit of that Harry Potter prat! He was exactly like his arrogant father.
He had spent that night prowling Hogwarts, docking points from everyone and anyone who caused him the slightest inconvenience.
He paced once more at such the preposterous thought of adopting Harry Potter. Lilly’s Son. Lilly.
That is when, suddenly, an idea skidded across his mind and his lips curled into a terrible smile.
If this is how Potter wanted to play… He could take this a step further…Why should he not sign the papers? Perhaps he could play along. It would be a game of cat and mouse.
Oh, yes… he could tell Potter he signed the papers. He could tell him that he had sent them to the ministry. He could tell Potter how delighted Dumbledore was to hear of it. He could tell him how his aunt and uncle were delighted at the idea as well. Oh, this could be fun.
He could even tell Potter that if he wished to call him ‘Snaddy’ that he would then be obligated to change his last name to Snotter and all would be well. Snape began to think some more as he practically pranced back to his desk and grabbed Harry’s adoption papers. He pulled out his quill, dipped it in ink and began cackling at his cleverness. Two could play this game.