Saved from my darkness
Sebastian POV.
It was only a few weeks into the new year when everything went horribly wrong. Fifth-year was slowly turning into a nightmare. Solomon was dead. Anne wasn’t talking to me. I messed up. I let a moment of anger and pain turn my heart dark. It took almost two weeks for me to come out of my dorm. Ominis hardly spoke a word to me during those days. I didn’t blame him of course. He had warned me not to take this path.
At the end of the second week, I was dragged out of my dorm by a persistent knocking. It was the middle of a Wednesday, leaving me the only one in the dorm to answer. Everyone should have been in class, so who could be pestering me now? I should have known. The only words uttered to me by my best friend these past weeks had been about the figure on the other side of the door.
Ominis had spoken of her several times, saying she was getting too reckless. He said we needed to move past this mess and be there for our friend. He begged me to step in. He said she was hardly in the castle anymore. He thought maybe it had been going on longer than we suspected. He believes she’s been carrying the world on her shoulders, only coming to us when truly necessary. I had suspected he’d been right, but I couldn’t bring myself to get out of bed.
As I swung the door open, I couldn’t help the guilt pooling in the pit of my stomach. There stood Artemis, perfect and beautiful as always, but something seemed off. Her cobalt eyes seemed clouded and lost like she was a million miles away from here. A fresh scar ran from her left eyebrow and straight down to just below her eye. Her vision didn’t seem affected, but the thought of her facing something that would cause that scared me. Her strawberry hair was wrapped neatly in a bun, but several strands fell around her freckled face, framing her pale skin perfectly. She’s dressed in a simple Slytherin uniform.
“Do you plan to stay holed up in here forever?” Her angelic voice floated through the room.
“I deserve it. I don’t know why you and Ominis didn’t turn me in.”
“Sebastian, you don’t-”
“Don’t! Don’t tell me I don’t deserve it. Don’t tell me it was just a mistake. Don’t make excuses for me. Please just leave me alone”, I hate the way my voice breaks as the words leave my lips. I don’t want to push her away, but I don’t want her to fall into the darkness that has consumed my soul. I love her too much to condemn her to this.
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Oh, I’m not leaving. I’m just saying I’ve heard you. Sebastian, you went down a bad path. You believed you were helping. You thought you were doing something right, but it turned out to be a dark road. That doesn’t define you. You are not a dark wizard. You are Sebastian Sallow. You are the brightest wizard I know. You are a kind and loyal and fierce friend. You are mine and Ominis’ best friend. You are Anne’s brother and twin. And you will learn and move on from this.”
“Anne and Ominis hate me.”
“Is that what you’ve told yourself? I won’t lie. They were hurt and they were mad. They tried to keep you off this path, as did I, but they do understand your path was paved with good intentions. They’re both worried, as am I. You can’t stay here in your darkness. You have a choice ahead of you. Are you going to give in to this darkness and let these choices define you, or will you allow us to guide you to a lighter path?”
“I killed someone.”
“You did.”
She goes silent for a moment. I think this will be the moment she realizes I’m too far gone to save. She’ll turn around and walk right out of this room. I brace myself for the worst, but instead, she reaches forward grabbing my cold hands in her warm one.
“So have I”, she whispers.
“They were poachers and dark wizards and goblins. They-”
“They were each someone. They once faced the same choice we both face. They had to decide which path to let define them. I’m the same as them, only I use my power to pour light into this world.”
Her words sink in. Maybe there is hope for me yet. Maybe I can move on from my actions. I think they will always be a part of me, but they don’t have to define me.
“I’m so sorry”, I suddenly cry out.
Her head is instantly against my chest. Her arms are wrapped around my waist, and for once I feel like I’m healing. Each tear is a piece of my pain mourning and moving on from my past. I don’t know how long we stand like that, but when Artemis steps back it feels like all too soon, still grasping onto my hand.
“It’s going to be okay, Sebastian. Ominis and I will make sure of that.”
I don’t ask her about the scar or the tired look in her eyes. I don’t mention Ominis’ concerns. I don’t mention how she feels thinner in my arms than she had before. I only wish I had. Maybe I could have helped her the way she helped me.
“Okay”, I whisper, as she takes my hand and guides me out of the dorm for the first time in two weeks.
Ominis is waiting for us in the common room. He doesn’t say anything, just hooks his arm around my elbow with a tight squeeze. We walk in near silence, except for the sound of Artemis and Ominis humming a quiet tune. I smile for the first time in weeks. I’m a lucky guy.
We make it down to the edge of the Black Lake, where a blanket and picnic basket are laid out. Joy spreads its warmth through my body at the sight. Artemis releases her hold on my hand, as she steps toward the picnic. I go to follow, but I’m held back by Ominis.
“I’m glad you’re okay”, he says.
“I’m glad I have friends who believe in me when I don’t. I’m truly sorry Ominis. I shouldn’t have fallen into that darkness. I wanted to save Anne, but I see now maybe it wasn’t the best route to take. I’d love to say I’d never do it again, but when someone you love is hurting so much I’m not sure your mind is always clear.”
“I understand, Sebastian. I can’t say I approve of your actions. My trust may not be the same again, but I do forgive you. I do hope in the future you can listen to your friends more, given this experience. Artemis and I will always have your best interest at heart.”
“Thank you, Ominis. I promise I will do better. I don’t want to be that person again”, I say taking a deep breath. “ Shall we go enjoy a lovely picnic?”
“Yes”, Ominis smiles, before leaning in close to my ear. “I do need to speak to you about Artemis later. I’m beginning to become severely worried for her well-being.”
I only nod before we continue to where Artemis has an assortment of fruits, sandwiches, and treats laid out along with several cups of pumpkin juice. She looks so happy to be here. The clouds in her eyes are gone for the moment, and she looks just like the girl who knocked me off my feet at the beginning of the year. Oh, how I wish we could stay in this moment where the three of us are safe from the things that haunt and threaten us.