“Remus, wake up!”
Remus was having a nightmare. One of the bad ones.
There had been a full moon last week and Remus had accidently hurt Sirius. The wolf and the dog were playing freely in the forbidden forest when the dog did something it shouldn’t have done. The wolf had reacted to it. And in the end Sirius’s arm started bleeding. The injury hadn’t been bad and it had been an accident but it was enough for Remus to have nightmares about it.
Remus had felt so guilty that he couldn’t even visit Sirius at the Hospital Wing until James and Peter quite literally dragged him there. And even when Sirius had said he wasn’t mad and that his arm didn’t hurt, Remus had still couldn’t look at him in the eye until Sirius had grabbed his face and forced him to.
He had told Remus that his arm was fine, that it didn’t hurt at all, that he would actually be allowed to leave after dinner and that it was just an accident. Remus hadn’t been able to form words and answer, for he was using all of his willpower to keep his sobs silent. Sirius had hugged him and explained the accident in detail so that Moony would believe that it was, in fact, an accident. It wasn’t Remus’ fault their play-fight had ended in the way it did.
“Wake up!”
James and Peter were holding down a struggling and panting Remus while Sirius held his head and shook him to wake him up. But he wasn’t waking up.
For the past week, Remus had had nightmares but it had never been that bad. The boys didn’t know what else to do.
“No, no, no! NO!”
Remus’ screams were too painful to hear. Sirius couldn’t bear them. None of them could.
“NO! SIRIUS NO!!”
What finally woke the boy was not his fiends but his own screams.
“NO!!!”
He sat up abruptly and pushed away all the hands holding him, his breathing frantic and his eyes wild. Sirius held him by the shoulders and forced the eye contact. “Remus, it’s me, Sirius. I’m alright. I’m not hurt.”
This seemed to calm Remus down a bit as he didn’t try to push Sirius away. His eyes roamed Sirius’ face and arm, looking for blood and claw marks. After a couple of seconds, he sighed. He bowed his head, accepting the fact that it was just a nightmare.
And the next thing Sirius knew, Remus had him in a bone crushing hug. Remus had his arms around Sirius’ waist and his face buried in his chest.
Sirius sighed loudly, his heart pounding against his chest. He put his arms around Remus as well and buried his face into his hair. He inhaled the familiar sent. He played with his hair and rubbed his back as he waited for Moony to calm down.
They sat like that for Godric knows how long until Remus started to pull away. But he didn’t let go of Sirius. He wouldn’t let go. He wasn’t ready for that yet. Nor was Sirius apparently, he still had one hand in Remus’ hair and another one at his back.
“I’m sorry.” Remus avoided Sirius’ eyes. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
Then the waterworks began. Apparently for a second time that night because the front of Sirius’ hoodie was already soaked.
“And I forgive you. I forgave you. I never even blamed you Remus. You are not guilty, okay? It wasn’t your fault. It was an accident. I didn’t realize how sharp your claws had gotten and I made a stupid move while we were play-fighting which caused you to respond badly on a reflex.
“Actually, you weren’t even attacking me when you did what you did. You were just pushing me away and because your claws had gotten sharper, they accidently cut me. It’s not your fault at all. I’ve already told you this twice Remus. When are you going to stop blaming yourself?
“It wasn’t even anything important. My arm bled for, like, fifteen minutes at tops, before Poppy stitched it up. It was a piece of cake. And it hardly hurt. Please Remus, stop torturing yourself. You are not a monster.”
Remus started crying hysterically after that. He trembled like a leaf. Sirius hugged him again, overcome with a protective feeling, the alarms in his head going off. James poured a glass of water while Peter opened a window. Sirius took the water from James and gave it to Remus. Then he turned Remus to the window so he could breathe in the fresh air.
Remus started to calm down after some time and stopped crying. But he was still trembling, because of exhaustion and probably cold too, so Sirius told Peter to close the window. He pulled away reluctantly. He got up and went over to his closet. Remus would complain or refuse to let go of Sirius if he could but he was too tired and weak to do that.
Sirius found a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie and helped Remus into them, knowing that since the hoodie smelled like him, the scent of it would help him relax and stay calm.
Remus’ smelling abilities were still stronger than usual as it had only been a week since the full moon, so he would be able to smell Sirius’ scent better than usual. Also, his PJs were drenched with sweat so he needed to change anyways. Then Sirius changed his hoodie to a dry one.
After that he picked Remus up and went over to his own bed. He tucked himself and his Moony in and wrapped his arms around him. Remus also wrapped his arms around Sirius and decided to use his chest as a pillow.
“Goodnight Moony.”
“Goodnight Padfoot.” Murmured Remus before drifting off to sleep in Sirius’ arms.