Warm
Sirius yelped at the blocks of ice suddenly burrowing under his thighs. He was sitting on the sofa in the common room, trying to catch up on some reading for Minnie. The fire had started dying down since it was nearing two am, and most people had gone to bed. He thought everyone had, but apparently someone else was still awake, and that someone else had fucking cold feet.
He turned his heat to look for the snowman and smiled at Remus’s sheepish expression. He was bundled in at least two jumpers and fluffy pj bottoms he’d invested in a few months prior. And somehow he was still cold? It baffled him.
“Moons?”
“Sorry, I’m cold, ‘tis all.”
He shook his head with a small shake of his head and looked back at his book, “nothing to apologise for, Moony, d’you want me to add more wood to the fire? I can get it going again?”
“You… you wouldn’t mind?”
Sirius’ head shook again before he stood up, placing a cushion over his friend’s feet as he did so, “why’re you up?”
“Couldn’t sleep, you?”
“Trying to get my head around this work,” he huffed a small laugh as he placed some more of the logs into the pit, making sure not to block off the supply of oxygen as he did so, “Minnie said I can have extra credit for it.”
Remus furrowed his brows, “why d’you need extra credit?”
“I missed one of the exams. One of the ones you can’t resit.”
He looked at him again, slightly more puzzled as he headed back over to him, sitting next to him and tugging his feet into his lap. Rem felt his stomach swarm with butterflies which made his heart flutter when the older boy started wordlessly massaging his feet. Fuck, his hands were so bloody warm. “Which? Why did you miss it?”
“Nothing, Moons. D’you feel warmer now?”
“Yeah… yeah, I do, thank you.” He paused for a beat and glanced at the book, “is that Pride and Prejudice?”
Sirius nodded and groaned dramatically, still dutifully massaging the slowly melting feet, “I think she’s trying to kill me. She said I don’t appreciate literature enough but I just don’t get it. She has too much pride, he has too much prejudice, blah blah.”
“Yeah but they overcame it, Pads. What’s she asking you to do for it?”
He sighed and paused to reach for the book, taking out a slip of paper with Mcgonagall’s handwriting on it, “to write an essay on how it could be applied to today’s social landscape.”
Remus hummed and snatched the book from him, scanning his annotations and smiling, “you’ve read this before?”
“Of course I have! I told Minnie that, too, she didn’t care. She said to read it again with fresh eyes.”
“She thinks your perspective will have changed from, what? Fifth year?”
“You can tell that from my handwriting?”
He blushed slightly and shrugged, tossing the book back gently, “lucky guess. Just bullshit it, Pads… after sleeping. You should come up to bed.”
Sirius sighed and pinched his ankle, “I’m comfy and there’s so many stairs.”
“Oh, you poor baby. Do you need me to carry you?”
The older boy flushed crimson and turned away to look at the fire, “I’m alright, Rem… you should go though, it’ll be warmer up there.”
“Than right next to a fire? D’you want me to go?”
He shook his head decisively, that was the one thing he didn’t want, “no, never.”
Remus smiled and lightly kicked his arm, “just tell me to go and I’ll go.”
“What if I asked you to stay?”
“You already know I’d stay, Sirius.”
“You’ll freeze… come here?”
He stared at him for a moment before shuffling around and across that space between them, falling into the open arm and humming softly, “thank you.”
Sirius inhaled shakily and tugged him as close as he could without physically lifting him and putting him on his lap, which may overlap their healthy platonic boundaries. He smiled at the contented sigh and resisted the urge to bury his face in the crook of his neck, “comfy?”
“Very.” He reached over for the blanket on the arm of the sofa and draped it over them, burrowing closer into the other’s figure when he settled back down, “I’m always comfortable with you. You’re so bloody warm.”
“Yeah? I’m glad, I know I don’t say it enough, but I love you, Moons.” He heard the shaky intake of breath but the figure in his arms didn’t tense or move away, instead he melted further into him.
Remus chanced a glance up at him, tilting his head back to take him the lines of his face, the sharper lines turning softer in the flickering firelight, “I love you too, Pads… are you okay?”
“Oui, just… thinking.”
“Oh god, you must be dreadfully ill if you’re thinking.”
He whacked his arm indignantly and scoffed, “wanker.”
“What’re you thinking about?”
Sirius paused before letting the word that had been running around his brain in circles for the last ten minutes or so escape as a whisper, “you. It’s always you.”
“Me?”
“You, Moons.”
“What about me?” He raised an eyebrow as he was gently shifted so Sirius could reach the book he’s propped on the back of the sofa behind him. “Siriu-”
The older boy cut him off with a scolding yet soft glare as he nervously thumbed through the pages, nearly at the end when he turned the book back to him. A few words leaped out at him and he felt his heart stutter in his chest before it completely jumped out and started running across his skin, faster and faster until he was sure it would launch itself into Sirius’ chest and refuse to resurface. In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.
Remus inhaled shakily, voice barely an octave above a breath, “are you sure this is the right page, Siri?”
“I’m certain. I folded down the corner.” His voice was wavering slightly as he tapped at the folded corner, right above a small scrawled note, in his current handwriting, “Remus” and a dotted heart. He was about to leap up and run away at the silence before he felt slightly cold fingers cup his jaw and tilt his face down to meet lips which were chapped but so soft despite that.
And fuck he was kissing Remus, Remus was kissing him. Fuck, fuck fuck fuck, he was dead. He was actually dead. And then Remus’ hand was in his hair and he was tugging him closer, breaking the kiss to turn him around so he didn’t snap his neck from tilting it back. His other hand had snuck under Sirius’ jumper and was splayed against his ribs. His own hands had given up any ounce of any semblance of control, gripping the first of many of Rem’s jumpers as he surged back into the kiss.
Remus almost groaned at the noises leaving the older boy’s lips, muffled by his own. He was fairly certain he was forgetting something quite important. It dawned on him when they next broke apart for the apparently necessary function of breathing. He smiled and rested their foreheads together, “I love and admire you too, ardently.”