Trust
It has almost been two months since Harry joined the snakes. His tutoring lessons were paying off and, being surrounded by studious students, Harry was getting accustomed to studying and hardworking, he even surprised the others a few times by initiating a study group. He was also getting closer with his classmates. They even started confessing in him! Nothing useful yet, but it was something.
It was the week before Halloween and Harry was gloomy. He could never be happy on those days.
“Why are you so sad Harry?” Asked Blaise.
“My parents will have died fifteen years ago in a few days.”
“Right, I forgot. I assume that you’re not in the mood for our celebration.”
Harry distantly shook his head; he wasn’t aware of the hard stare Draco was directing towards his friend.
“But you should come either way Harry, you can’t be depressed every Halloween. You have to celebrate it. Think about it, if you don’t come this year, you never will, and later, when you’re all old and cranky, your kids won’t ever forgive you for not allowing them to party.”
“I will allow them to celebrate! Only, not with me.”
“And that’s the problem. Kids want both of their parents with them, not only one. Besides, us, Slytherins, do things a little differently. “
“How differently?”
“Old traditions. Ones that were long forgotten by most wizards. Only a few of us still acknowledge them. “
His neighbor elbowed him, but Blaise paid him no mind.
“No.”
“Pretty pleaseeee Harry, it will be so fun.”
“I’ll think about it. Sighed Harry.”
Their way to class was abnormally quiet that morning, the others seemed mad that Blaise invited him to the party, which Harry would normally be offended about if he wasn’t already upset.
Harry was daydreaming all day. He managed to lose more points than he ever had since he changed houses.
That evening, everyone seemed on edge. The silence was heavy, and the tension was almost unbearable. Harry sat on the couch with Blaise and Theo, none of them speaking. The lot was mad at Blaise for who knows what and they wanted to be at Harry as well for losing so many points, but considering the circumstances, they couldn’t.
After a few more minutes, Harry has had enough. He couldn’t stand it anymore.
“I’m going out.” He announced his friends.
He stood up and headed in the dungeons. The boy wandered a bit without a goal in particular before deciding to find Hermione. It had been long since he hung up with her.
Obviously, the first place he went looking for was the library. Praying for his friend to be there and not in the Gryffindor’s tower, Harry entered the library. Fortunately for him, she was there, only, she was not alone. Ron was there as well. Despite knowing it was wrong, the boy hid behind a shelf and spied on their conversation.
“… worried about him you know, it’s Halloween soon.” Was saying Hermione.
“Yeah, well he is a big boy and he has alllll these new friends to hang out with. He can celebrate with them.”
“You don’t understand Ron. Harry never celebrates Halloween, he’s always sad during the day and locks himself in the dorms.”
“I bet he doesn’t this year. I even bet he can’t wait to eat candy with his new buddies. Stop worrying about him, he’s not worth it. Maybe the others were right, maybe the Dark Lord did not come back and he said it for an ulterior purpose.”
“How can you say that!”
“He is a snake Hermione and you can’t argue with that, he’s literally in the snake house to which he changed for a reason.”
“Everyone changes during their lives; you are just too immature to acknowledge that we’re not the same forever.”
“Nobody does this fast! I don’t recognize him. We used to spend nights talking behind the Slytherins’ back and now, I feel like it is the other way around.”
“You can’t say that. Harry would never. Unlike you, I’ve talked to him and I can confidently say that he is still the sweet boy I’ve became friends with.”
“If you’re so certain, why didn’t you tell him about the DA. It doesn’t seem like you trust him that…”
Harry had heard enough. He was always worrying about Ron, even when the other boy ignored him. He was constantly missing him. Many times, he turned to tell him something only to find out he wasn’t there. He was waiting and waiting and waiting for the moment when his friend would come back and everything would be back to normal. Ron was more than his friend; he was his brother. Harry was hurt by what he had said. It also hurt that he did not believe him about Voldemort. The one person who was supposed to be there forever had turned his back on him and it hurt like hell.
Harry walked for a long time that night, grieving the loss of his best friend because that was what it meant, wasn’t it? He couldn’t be friend with someone who thought he was a snake.
The poor boy did not know what to think about Hermione. She was still talking to him, but it seemed like she did not trust him. It hurt knowing it. However, Harry was not the one able to complain. He did hide the fact that he spends every spare time buried in the dark arts. Harry figured he could not hold grudge to Hermione but promised himself to ask her later on.
He wandered around the castle until 1 o’clock before returning to his dorm. Lost in thoughts, he did not notice the dim light coming from Draco’s bed.
“Are you alright Harry?” He asked, startling the other.
“No.” At this point, Harry was too tired to lie.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Harry shook his head and with an understanding nod, the blonde turned off the light and went to bed. Following his lead, Harry jumped on his bed without removing any clothes and fell in a disturbed sleep.
That night, he dreamt about the same thing from the last time he forgot to clear his head. He was still in that hallway, looking endlessly for something unknown and out of reach.
-------
“Can I talk to you?” Asked Harry to Draco later the next day.
“Always.”
“It’s about last night.”
“I have a feeling it isn’t only about your parents. To be honest, you seemed ten times worst after going out.”
“You’re right. My friendship with Ron is over and I’m still unsure about Hermione.” Harry sighed. “I overheard them talking about me in the library. It looks like they don’t trust me anymore. Even Hermione who has been constantly affirming that nothing would change between us. I guess you were right in first year, I did need help choosing friends, ones that would never lose faith in me.”
“Harry, I was eleven, I knew nothing. Weasley and Granger were good friends. Your time with each other was over and it is now due for a new chapter in your life.”
“I hope it was as simple as that.”
Instead of answering, Draco walked forward and gave Harry a hug. At first, Harry only stood there, arms loose, surprised from this display of affection before encircling his arm around Draco’s body. The raven dug his head in Draco’s neck and inhaled deeply. Odd enough, he felt slightly better in the embrace.
“Come for Halloween, it will take your mind off of your worries. Besides, I’m sure it’s what your parents would have wanted, being happy instead of all sad and gloomy.”
“I’ll come.” Smiled Harry. “Thanks.”
“Like I said, always.”
The two teens made their way downstairs and were greeted by their friends waiting for them.
“Come with us, we are going by the lake.” Exclaimed Travis.
The ten of them made their way and once they reached it, Harry was surprised to see they were stripping down. He panicked for a moment before realizing that all nine had bathing suits underneath. Daphne must’ve seen his surprised face because she laughed before explaining things to him.
“Right, I forgot you are new to this. Each year, we come here, swimming one last time before it’s too cold to do it.”
“We should have done it in February this year, with Harry swimming in the winter.” Mocked Blaise.
“Don’t remind me! It was the worst experiment ever. I was sure to get a pneumonia after this. I would have joined you, but I don’t have a bathing suit.”
“What do you mean you don’t have a bathing suit?” Asked Pansy. “We brought you like eight in Hogsmeade. Here, let me get you one. Accio bathing suit.”
After a few seconds of waiting, a black bathing suit came flying in Harry’s hands. The poor boy had no idea he had paid for those. In honesty, he couldn’t recall half of his new clothes.
He rapidly changed behind a tree before joining his friends in the water. They played a long time, at this point their fingers were all wrinkled. However, they didn’t care. They were having too much fun!
“Let’s get going. It’s curfew soon.” Stated Draco.
“I forgot mister Prefect here. That’s why I’m not one. You’re all party breakers.” Joked Theo.
“No! we’re having too much fun! Let’s stay.” Complained Millicent.
“The teachers will be able to see us.” Countered Gregory. “I was in big trouble the last time I was caught; I don’t want to repeat the experience.”
“I agree with Millicent, I want to stay. We can just cast Sub oculis and play another game.”
Instead of being greeted by the expected agreements, Harry was met by gaping mouths and round eyes.
“What?” He asked, now self-conscious,
“Where did you learn this spell Harry?” Slowly asked Pansy.
That’s when Harry noticed his slip up. The spell was a dark one. Harry felt so stupid at the moment. He could’ve proposed hundreds of other spells like Diffindo, but no. He just had to state the only dark one. He wanted to wait for them to talk about Dark arts, revealing what he already knew about them, it seemed like the strategy was reversed. Harry was the one to spill out.
“Do you have any idea what this is?” Added Tracey.
“I…” He swallowed. “Let’s talk about it elsewhere.”
“Right.”
The group got out of the lake, casted a drying charm, dressed up and followed the directions to their common room, all while staring intensely at the raven. They were looking like they feared their friend might run away, which seemed like a good idea at the moment. Once inside, the dragged him in the dorm and sat him by the chimney. Theo and Daphne sat with him when the others preferred to take a seat on the beds.
“So, care to explain yourself?” Asked Vincent without preamble.
“Hum…”
“Harry, remember when we told you that what happens in Slytherins stays in Slytherins? We were not joking. You can tell us the truth.” Encouraged Daphne.
Harry considered lying about it. He could just say that he picked it up from Voldemort from one of his numerous encounters. However, he realized it wouldn’t be productive. The one reason he was not totally dreading his new house at first was because of the dark arts. If he wanted to actually learn something from his friends, he had to come clean.
Harry took a deep breath and told them everything. “I found a library this summer. It had a full collection of books on dark arts. I read one and from this point on, I couldn’t tear my eyes from them. I even practised some spells in a room where the ministry couldn’t sense my magic with Sirius.”
“So, you’re interested in the dark arts.” Carefully said Pansy.
“Yes. I am.” He took a deep breath. “I want to learn anything I can about it.”
There was a long uncomfortable silence. Harry was waiting for the moment they would admit they were as well, but the moment did not seem to come. After a long minute or two, when Harry was starting to wonder if he was right about them, Blaise finally said something that lit up a spark of hope in the boy, but not before giving him a heart attack.
“Harry, this type if magic is illegal, Theo can just walk out, say three words to Professor Snape and you would spend your life in Azkaban. The things you just admitted.” Blaise shook his head. “These are big.”
“What Blaise is trying to say here is; you can’t afford so spill out like that.” Interrupted Daphne. “We are your friends, but not everybody is. You could’ve destroyed your life in a matter of seconds here. You really need to be more careful.”
“Fortunately for you, we might be able to help you.” Said Blaise, taking the lead once again. “How far have you learnt?”
“Enough to come to the conclusion that all of you lot practice it as well.”
“So, you’ve known for two months and did not think of telling it? We were walking on eggshells around you, trying not to say anything compromising.”
“Well, you just said it, I cannot say it to every walking bodies. I wasn’t a hundred percent certain and even if I was right, you could’ve ratted me out either way. Don’t take it wrong, but I did not know it I could actually trust you. I was being cautious here. Actually, I was waiting for you to spill something, but it turned against me.”
“Look at you being all Slytherin Harry!” Exclaimed Theo. “That’s totally what I would’ve done. Well, except for the part where you messed up.”
“I’m not proud of that part either.”
“You shouldn’t.” Spoke Draco for the first time since the lake. “Imagine if you had said it in front of the wrong people. You are extremely lucky, and we don’t need to reuse your luck. You need to be extremely careful from now on.”
“I know. I will be.”
“Good.” The blonde replied. “Now that secrets are told, we can finally be ourselves with each other and not hide a part of us! It’s great!”
“I won’t say that it’s a part of me Draco. It’s just something I’m reading about.”
“It’s not a part of you yet. I might become in the future. With our help, you’ll see the beauty of the dark arts and you will not be able to wait and become a real dark wizard.”
“Seems like you can’t wait for this moment.”
“Because I can’t. This is a big deal Harry. You, Harry Potter, the-boy-who-live and savior of the world, a dark wizard? It would change everything.”
“I’m not a dark wizard Draco and I won’t be. I want to kill Voldemort because he uses it. I can’t just be one.”
“Don’t say his name.” Hissed Pansy. “And you don’t want to kill him because he is a dark wizard, you want to because he wants to kill half the planet.”
“Stop harassing him.” Scolded Tracey. “He doesn’t have to make a decision. For now, let’s teach him all he has to know and understanding how everything works, Harry will be able to make the best decision.” She then turned to Harry. “We’ll start with the beginning. I want you to read a book about cycle days.”
“Cycle days?”
“Yes. And hopefully, you will understand why we weren’t happy about you being invited at Halloween.”
At that, the eight others sent glares at her.
“What? He’s not blind. He already knew it. After that, Harry, you will resume everything to us. I’ll lend you a book tomorrow.”
“Don’t you think it would be easier if you just told me?” Wondered Harry.
“We are not teachers.” Answered Daphne. “It’ll be more efficient if you learn from the most reliable source; books. You can always come to us if you have any questions.”
“I have one actually. Are you all dark wizards?”
“Theo, Blaise and I are.” Answered Pansy. “Draco, Daphne and Tracey as well. As for the other three, they use some spells, but aren’t adept.”
“Can everyone one practice it?”
“Everyone can learn Harry. It takes work and some are simply better at it, just like everything else.”
“And what about…”
“That’s enough for now.” Interrupted Millicent. “It’s getting late and we have a test tomorrow. We’ll talk about it later.”
“Yes mom.” Blaise rolled his eyes.
“Just one more question.” Harry pleaded.
“Go on.”
“Can dark wizards still perform light magic?”
“Once we commit to the dark, it is difficult for us. It’s not impossible, but we might, no we will feel a little ill after. The same goes for the other way. It is much rarer though. Much light wizards do not bother to declare like us do.” Daphne said. “It’s not like they feel the need to maintain it from disappearing like the dark magic might.”
“You really think it could disappear one day?”
“Of course. Only a few still practice it in the entire world and here, we Slytherins are surely the only ones.”
“All right. Question time is over. Goodnight.”
That night, Harry had a lot of difficulty to sleep. In two days, he found out that his best friends of four years did not trust him and just revealed his biggest secret to children of the Dark lord’s followers. Harry couldn’t shake the thought that he just made a big mistake.
Six of his classmates were dark wizards and the other three did use it from time to time. He already knew it, of course, but having the real confirmation made everything much more real.
He also wondered about the thing Tracey said about Halloween and cycle days. What was the deal about it anyway? Well, he guessed he would find out soon.