Rhonda was positively done.
She was done with it all.
The mystery, the Mr Martin beef, fucking Maddie Nears.
Against her better judgment, however, she was not done with Quinn.
She wanted to be.
Sitting by the pool, staring into the abyss of blue and contemplating, she wanted to get up and leave when she heard Quinn opening the door, but--
Part of her would not let her leave.
Quinn walked up, nodding and sitting a bleacher behind Rhonda. She leaned forward, staring in the same direction. "What're you thinking?" She asked, quiet.
Rhonda didn't want to tell her. "I'm thinking that everything is bullshit," she muttered anyway, shaking her head. She was always pessimistic, of course, but weeks--no, months like this shot her into hell at a 90 degree angle.
Two seconds passed before she sighed and pat the bleacher next to her, cordially inviting Quinn to slide down closer, and Rhonda did not hate the added texture of skin to skin.
Give her a break. Even that was hard to admit.
Quinn didn't flinch, however. She let
the silence marinate, not afraid of awkward pauses and god. Rhonda wanted to hate her.
It was proving to be incredibly difficult.
"I like your outfit," Quinn eventually murmured, giving her a kind once over. "Good one to die in."
"Better than yours," she quietly quipped in return. Her lips quirked into a small smile, softening the insult and losing any real bite.
Quinn just laughed. "It's not the most breathable fabric."
The silenced stretched again, and Rhonda noticed that it got less awkward with every second.
And, again, she wanted to hate that.
Her brain didn't seem to cooperate as she randomly blurted, "I'm sorry if I've been a bitch." She let it sit, only slightly regretting it. "You... you have most definitely tested my sanity, but in recent days you've been the least annoying. It's not for nothing." Her voice was quiet, testy, and she hated it.
Quinn, ever kind, just smiled and shrugged. "I like you, Rhonda. You're not as intense as the others." She waited a beat before sticking her pinky up, a pending promise. "Friends?"
Rhonda did not hesitate, raising her hand and locking pinkies with this sunshine of a girl. "Friends," she whispered.
She did not hate that.
The realization that she wanted to kiss Quinn wasn't much of a shock.
She'd known she was a lesbian for a long fucking time. She'd had her crushes.
This feeling, however, was new.
It wasn't fleeting, like the other crushes. It very much stayed. It was apparent in the butterflies when Quinn got too close, in the smiles reserved only for her, in the small little touches that would've made her heart beat faster if she'd had one.
And, of course, Charley wasn't an idiot.
He pulled her to the side after an unofficial group meeting, grinning so hard she wondered if he was alive again.
"Why were you giving Quinn fuck me eyes the whole time?" He whispered aggressively, and she was fucked.
"Don't worry about it--"
He shook his head. "I'm worrying about it. Well, not worrying, more--you know what? It doesn't matter. Rhonda." He gave her a meaningful look, but she had no clue what he meant. She attempted to walk away.
It did not work.
"Do you have a crush on Quinn?" He asked, going straight for it, and--
"Yeah," she whispered, completely and ethically unable to lie. "Trust me, I do not want it, but yes. Are you happy?"
He just shrugged. "You know she most likely also wants to kiss you."
"I've never been that bold," she muttered, decidedly ignoring the wilted butterflies in her stomach.
God.
Weeks later, Rhonda was starting to love her.
It scared her, of course. Blush grew, so did fear--and Quinn just got more smiley and kinder every day.
She wanted to hate it. She wanted to hate everything about her, yet she found herself completely unable as Quinn rested her head on Rhonda's shoulder, sitting on the bleachers where they first promised friends.
Without warning, she desperately wanted to cry.
In the 60 years she'd be dead, not once had someone cared enough to lean on her shoulder, to bring her the last jelly donut, to completely ignore and forgive when she lost her shit over mild things, but--
Quinn did. Rhonda did not think she deserved it.
Being the fucking mind reader she was, Quinn reached over and gently took one of her hands, clasping and intertwining their fingers like it was nothing.
And it should've been nothing. It should've been just a friend comforting a friend, and Rhonda knew it probably was to Quinn, but...
It wasn't nothing. Lightning shot in her stomach, lighting sparks all around her ribs, connecting until it was all one big blaze and goddamnit Rhonda was starting to love her.
Quinn squeezed her hand harder. "What are you thinking?" She asked, her go-to question after she realized the answer to are you okay started to be eternally no.
For once in her life, Rhonda did not have words.
(For all of 2 minutes, anyway.)
"I'm thinking," she started, quiet and timid, unlike herself at all. "That... I quite like you, Quinn." It was not entirely a lie.
"You sound like you're about to cry," Quinn whispered back, just as delicate. She lifted her head off Rhonda's shoulder, turning her head to look just as Rhonda did and suddenly--
Suddenly, they were close enough to kiss.
Quinn's eyes were downright evil, full of kindness and big and brown. She gently raised her left hand, resting on Rhonda's jaw and yeah.
Fuck. She'll either kiss this girl or die trying at this rate.
Quinn did not move past there. Her thumb swiped across her cheek, wiping a tear she hadn't notice had fallen, and Rhonda moved in so slightly Quinn almost did not notice.
Almost.
"You okay?" She gently whispered, soft hands creating a short circuit within Rhonda. It pissed her off, really. Nobody should have that soft of hands after playing a fucking brass instrument for 30 years and--
God, she really had to calm down. It was getting ridiculous.
"Yeah," Rhonda whispered back, breathy and almost lost. They were inches away. "Quinn, I--"
Of course, something had to ruin it.
Wally barged in with the volume of an elephant, not even noticing the two of them scramble apart and drop hands before yelling something about Maddie.
And, yeah. Maddie Nears was really starting to piss her off.
The next time they were alone, it was awkward.
Of course it was.
When Rhonda thinks back, she knows that it was entirely her fault. Quinn wasn't awkward about it at all, really, and she was truly a saint for that.
Well, except for the refusing-to-look-at-her part.
Rhonda wanted to blurt something out so badly.
Quinn was in the office chair in the library, throwing a ball at the ceiling and catching it over and over. Rhonda watched it like she was hypnotized.
"Quinn," she murmured softly, scooting forward on her wooden table a little bit and reaching out with one hand, a gesture for the ball.
She hesitated before tossing it the 5 feet, lifting one corner of her mouth when Rhonda caught it perfectly.
"Just needed you to actually make eye contact with me," she quipped, raising one eyebrow and throwing the ball back.
Quinn did not flinch, catching it and shrugging like she didn't care. "You're the one being awkward," she murmured, again refusing eye contact as she tossed back.
Another perfect catch. Talk about a fucking elephant. Rhonda briefly wondered if she was going to regret this conversation. "Where are the others?"
Toss.
"Maddie stuff."
Toss.
"Why won't you look at me?" Rhonda stared, willing and hoping for her to stare back as she somehow avoided it.
Toss.
"Why are you being awkward?" She shot back. Her legs kicked up into the desk, crossing and knocking over a pen that she paid no attention to.
Toss.
"Why did you almost kiss me?"
She tossed, and Quinn absolutely missed it.
Rhonda didn't regret saying it.
"That's... cocky."
Rhonda hummed. "I wasn't sure until you just reacted like I told you I'd killed your parents." She moved closer, hopping onto the library desk a couple feet away, criss cross. "Answer me, Quinn." Her voice was again soft, testy, and she hated it.
Quinn shrugged again. "I just... you didn't seem too great. I didn't mean to, I'm sor--"
"Apologize and I'll kill you again," Rhonda muttered. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes as she gently kicked Quinn's calf, tilting the corner of her lip up. She lowered her voice to almost inaudible. "I would've kissed you back, you know."
Quinn's eyes widened, breath stuttering and stopping altogether. "Are... are you serious?"
Rhonda laughed, smiling a little wider and fighting the urge to kiss her right then and there. "It'd be a stupid thing to lie about."
And wouldn't you know it--
It was Maddie that interrupted this time. In her defense, the rest were trailing, but Rhonda chose to target her out of pure spite.
Maddie raised an eyebrow at them before shrugging and moving on. Rhonda realized Quinn had backed away, and she was not doing this again.
Rhonda rolled her eyes as the rest started in on a too-serious meeting. She got up, grasped Quinn's hand and pulled her out of the library before her sunshine of a girl could protest.
She did not give her much warning before leaning in as soon as they were out of view, gently pushing her against a wall by the waist. One hand rested on her hip, the other on her chin, and Rhonda could not bear those big brown eyes any longer.
"I'm going to kiss you," she whispered, allowing no time for protest, and--
Yeah. Maybe her entire death had been leading up to this moment.
Quinn's lips were soft. Soft and warm, positively intoxicating as her breath caught in her throat and Rhonda loved her.
It sparked something in her chest, ribs setting on fire once more. She'd never felt anything like it. She'd begun to think the feeling might kill her twiceover.
She felt Quinn laugh against her lips, light and true. She grinned, effectively breaking the kiss, pulling back and brushing her cheek.
Quinn stared back with a mixture of awe and starstruck, nodding towards the library again almost automatically. "You should probably go join them."
She rolled her eyes, kissing her again. "You're better."
Rhonda never wanted to pull back.