Walking Among Ghosts
He was seeing ghosts. He was seeing ghosts everywhere and they weren’t even aware, that they were living on borrowed time. They weren’t even aware, that in less than eight years they would be dead, in less than seven years Dumbledore would fall, in less than six years the Order would fight once again against Voldemort and in less than five years Voldemort would rise again.
How was he supposed to change anything of that? He was just Harry. Just one person. Even in the now dead future Death had shown him, he hadn’t defeated Voldemort on his own. It had been the Elderwand, that had made all the difference, not to mention his friends without whom he would have died ten times over.
What had he been thinking coming back here?
“Open up, you stupid wall!”, he yelled, but there was no door forming in front of him, despite him pacing the corridor for the fifth time now. Not even the Room of Requirements knew how to help him.
Harry, Ron, and Hermione pelted along in his wake, and the fire pursued them. It was not normal fire. As they turned a corner, the flames chased them as though they were alive, sentient, intent upon killing them. Now the fire was mutating, forming a gigantic pack of fiery beasts; Flaming serpents, chimaeras, and dragons rose and fell and rose again, and the detritus of centuries on which they were feeding was thrown up into the air into their fanged mouths, tossed high and clawed feet, before being consumed by the inferno.
He tried to shake off the ashy taste in his mouth and the beads of sweat on his forehead. He felt too hot all of a sudden. He shouldn’t have come here. He should have known he wouldn’t be able to face the room, let alone use it.
Trying to even his breathing, he slowly turned and walked back the same corridor he had come from. With horror he realized which corridor it was.
The air exploded. He heard the screams and yells of his companions without a hope of knowing what had happened to them –
“No – no – no!”, someone was shouting. “No! Fred! No!”
“Harry!”, Fred called, sounding relieved. “What’s the matter? We followed you up here, everyone is –“, Harry pointed his wand straight at him, shaking. Fred was dead.
“Tell me something only Fred Weasley knows.”
“What? What has –“
“TELL ME!”
George had whipped out his wand as well, but didn’t have it pointed at Harry. Fred was still unarmed, staring at Harry nonplussed. He exchanged a short glance with George.
“We… were planning on setting Lee’s tarantula free in the common room”, he grinned, “It’s so nice, waking up to screams in the morning”, he added.
Harry’s hand didn’t lower. “How did you find me here?”, he asked quickly. Fred and George shared another glance. “You know, when you know the castle as well as we do –“ “You’ve used the Map”, Harry realized and the twins looked positively scandalized. “You know about our map?”
Harry finally lowered his wand. His whole body was shaking so much it was a wonder he hadn’t dropped his wand on accident.
“Look, that doesn’t matter right now”, George said. “What matters is your sorting. We’re sorry, okay? And you don’t need to worry. You won’t wrestle a troll or something, you just put on the Hat and it will sort you into your house.”
Harry had the sudden urge to laugh and the twins looked at him as if he was mad. “You thought I ran because I believed your ridiculous stories?” The twins kept an embarrassed silence. “It wasn’t because of that”, Harry said firmly. “Believe me, it was nothing you did – nothing at all, it was just – it was just too much, all of a sudden and I had to get out of there, I didn’t know – didn’t know how to handle – to see everyone there, I mean even Snape – I don’t like him, but…”, he noticed that he was rambling and quickly closed his mouth. About nothing he just said would have made sense to them both.
“It’s because of me”, he concluded. “I’m broken. It has nothing to do with you.”
Fred and George snorted indignantly. “You are not broken, Harry.”
“Yes, I am”, Harry argued. “You’ve no idea what I’ve been through. It… it broke me, I think. I haven’t had time to think about it, but now…”
“And even if you’re right”, George interrupted him calmly. “There is nothing so broken that it can’t be fixed. We’re magic, aren’t we? Reparo is an easy spell.”
Harry wanted to argue with them. Tell them exactly of the destructive powers of some curses, that even reparo couldn’t fix, but couldn’t bring himself to do so. “So what now?”, he asked and the twins grinned.
“Now”, Fred said, “It’s time to get you sorted. ‘twould be shame if you had to sit with the professors after all.” Harry rolled his eyes good-naturedly. “Maybe they’ll found a whole new house for you”, George mused. “For those who can’t or don’t want to be sorted.”
Harry smiled weakly when he followed them down the corridor.
««»»
“Mister Potter”, McGonagall said sternly. Harry averted his gaze quickly. “Messrs Weasley, you’re supposed to be in the hall. Off you go.”
Fred and George did what they had been told for once, but didn’t return to the hall without grinning at Harry one last time.
“Mister Potter… are you quite well?”
Harry bit back a retort he would regret, telling her exactly how okay he was, coming straight from a war zone. “I’m better now, Professor. I apologize for my behaviour.”
McGonagall raised her eyebrows, but nodded. “Very well. I’d like to encourage you though, to come to your Head of House’s office after you’ve been sorted, in case you want to talk about anything.”
“Thank you, Professor”, Harry said perfectly polite. She doesn’t know me. She’s not my Head of House yet.
««»»
The glances and whispers were even worse this time. Harry figured it was kind of a given, since he did make kind of a scene before. That didn’t mean he had to like it.
Snape and Dumbledore especially eyed him carefully – Snape hatefully and Dumbledore thoughtfully.
Harry repressed the urge to groan and sat down on the little stool. Everyone else had already been sorted and Harry figured this didn’t really help Snape’s misconception, that he always wanted special treatment. And Dumbledore was probably trying to figure what was wrong with him for running out of the hall – not that he could blame him for that.
“Hmm”, said a small voice in his ear. “Difficult. Very – oh, interesting. I don’t think I’ve sorted a time traveller before.”
Right, the hat can read my thoughts. Should have thought of that.
“Yes, you should have”, the hat agreed. Harry was kind of embarrassed for getting called out like this. “You should be”, the hat agreed again, making it even worse. “Now, what is your purpose here?”
What?, Harry thought. What do you mean?
“Well, why are you here? You came from the future – from the beyond even, as it seems. So where am I supposed to put you?”
Harry hadn’t really thought about that. He wanted to save many lives, so much was sure, but how, he didn’t really know. Maybe he should have made a plan beforehand.
“For this stupidity alone, I should put you in Gryffindor again”, the hat mused and Harry barely refrained form crying out in indignation. “Yes, yes, Gryffindors are always so easy to rile up”, the hat chuckled and Harry started feeling like this was all a good joke for it. “I cannot deny, that my entertainment is somewhat limited, being me.”
Just place me in Gryffindor again and be over with it, Harry thought. He could practically feel everyone’s eyes on him, even though the hat shielded most of the hall from his view.
“Really”, the hat said slowly. “You fit well in Gryffindor, I cannot deny that. But you shouldn’t rule out the other houses without consideration. “Depending on what you want to do here and how you plan on doing it, other houses might be better suited for you.”
Harry rolled his eyes. You want to put me in Slytherin again, he accused and the hat chuckled again.
“Ah, very perceptive. I admit, I like the idea. Especially after you refused the first time. I stand by what I said, Slytherin would suit you well.”
Harry felt a cold shudder overcome him. But I’m not a Horcrux anymore. There is no more Tom Riddle in me, I’m just me!
“And haven’t you learned over the years, that it is our actions that define us, and not our abilities? You are a powerful wizard, much like Tom Riddle was. In fact you are similar in many ways, as you’re already aware. Your connection to Tom Riddle didn’t make you a worthy Slytherin. Your slyness and determination do. Even back then, you would have been a fine Slytherin on your own.”
That’s encouraging, Harry thought sarcastically and he thought the hat to sigh. “Slytherin house isn’t evil, Mister Potter. Despite what you have may learned in your years. What you’ve seen of Slytherin house is the result of years of grief, anger, hatred and misconceptions. I may be an item of Godric Gryffindor’s making, but I’m sworn to all of the Hogwarts founders and I don’t plan on leaving one of the houses in ruins.”
So that’s why you want me in Slytherin, Harry realized. You think I could make it better?
“I admit, that this has been my intention. Although you’d fit well in there either way”, the hat added cheekily and Harry rolled his eyes again. Fine, he decided. Have it your way. I don’t know if you’re right, but I don’t have a plan anyway. Maybe being a Slytherin will put things into a new perspective. Last time you respected my wishes, so now I will respect yours.
He could have sworn he felt the hat twitch on his head. Maybe it grinned.
“You’re an exceptional wizard, Mister Potter. You will do well in SLYTHERIN!”
The hall was eerily silent when McGonagall took off the hat. He saw a few students looking around confused – probably Muggleborns, who didn’t understand the significance of his sorting yet. The Slytherins merely stared at him, then a few clapped hesitatingly, while the other houses were completely silent. Not even the twins were joking, although Harry wasn’t sure it was because they thought he had just had a mental breakdown over his sorting and didn’t want to further feed his fears or because they truly were speechless.
Harry tended to the first. Them being truly speechless seemed a bit too unlikely.
There was a free seat next to Draco Malfoy of all people and Harry sat down wordlessly.
Malfoy gave a harsh laugh. “You care about me saying ‘Mudblood’ when I’m about to kill you?”
“I haven’t got any options!”, said Malfoy, and he was suddenly as white as Dumbledore. “I’ve got to do it! He’ll kill me! He’ll kill my whole family!”
“Well, Draco?”, said Lucius Malfoy. “Is it? Is it Harry Potter?”
“I can’t – I can’t be sure”, said Draco. He was keeping his distance from Greyback, and seemed as scared of looking at Harry as Harry was of looking at him. Draco’s expression was full of reluctance, even fear.
“I don’t know.”
“Seems like we’re gonna be stuck together for a while”, Malfoy drawled. “I’m much better company than Weasleys though.”
Harry barely held in a sigh. Oh joy, sharing a dorm with Draco Malfoy. But then realized with horror, that he had forgotten another things, that being a Slytherin would entrail.
He looked at the staff table, where black eyes met his.
Snape was his Head of House.
««»»
Harry decided, that he wouldn’t need a talk with his Head of House this evening or any other evening. Instead he followed their prefect down into the dungeons, pretending to not know the way she was showing them.
All the other first years were awfully quiet on their way to the common room – Harry wasn’t sure if it was because of him or because Gemma naturally demanded for respect and the others were too scared to chatter around, but he didn’t care either. All he wanted was to fall into bed and close his eyes and never wake up again. But he probably gave up his chance to do that.
“Boys dormitories are on the right, girls on the left. Breakfast starts at seven-thirty, first class is at nine. You are to help each other if any problems arise. I expect you to be on your best behaviour and not pick any unnecessary fights. The Slytherin House is looked down upon in this school, so you will present yourself as a united front in the face of the rest of the school. You can come for help to any older student, Professor Snape has office hours from four to six. Curfew for you is eight pm. After that you’re not allowed to wander the halls, but you can stay in the common room for as long as you wish. Older students are allowed to stay out longer. Are there any questions?”
No one said anything and Gemma nodded, satisfied, then wished them a good night. Her gaze lingered only a moment longer on Harry than on any other student, but she didn’t say anything. He decided he liked her.
The first years dispersed and left Harry standing in the middle of the common room, alone. Resigning to his fate, he walked up to the dorms and found himself in a room with Draco Malfoy, Theodore Nott and Blaise Zabini, Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle.
“I see you’ve finally found your way here, Potter”, Malfoy drawled. “Pick a bed – except this, I want a chance to see the Giant Squid”, he pointedly sat down on the bed nearest to him. It was right next to a huge window looking into the Black Lake.
Nott snorted. “Sure, Malfoy. Just tell us when you can’t sleep, because some creepy merpeople are watching you.”
Malfoy didn’t deign that with an answer, but threw a shoe at Nott, which he expertly evaded.
For a few moments the boys worked in silence. Unpacking their trunks, readying their beds, feeding their pets. Harry had picked the bed closest to the door and no one had argued with him.
“Is no one gonna address the Hippogriff in the room?”, Zabini then said and the others looked almost guilty. Harry seemed to be the only one left out – as he figured it would be most of the time now. Faced with Harry’s confused glance, Malfoy apparently decided to clear some things up.
“You’re a Slytherin”, he said to Harry, who almost laughed out loud. “I’m well aware”, he said. “So? Will you tell me why no one was cheering for me? At first I thought no one was supposed to, but then a few started clapping and I was wondering –“
“Yes, well”, Malfoy said uncomfortably. “No one expected you to be sorted into Slytherin.”
“And why not?” It was surprisingly easy to play the innocent first-year boy he ad once been. It was fun even, to toy with Malfoy.
“Dang it, Potter, you’re the wizarding world’s showpiece. You heard what Farley said. Slytherin doesn’t have a great reputation”, Nott explained impatiently.
Harry frowned. “Why am I the wizarding world’s showpiece? I’ve only learned about it last month. I don’t think I’ve ever met a witch or wizard beside Hagrid – and Fred and George of course. But you knew that.”
The five boys stared at him. “You’ve never been to the magical world before?”, Crabbe asked dumfounded and Harry shrugged, busying himself with Hedwig, who sat perched on top of his trunk.
“Why?”, Malfoy blurted out. “Was it because of all the attention? Was that the reason you ran out earlier as well?”
Harry gulped. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
Awkward silence followed, then Zabini announced he would use the bathroom and everyone went silently back to their own tasks. Harry made extra sure, that his worn-out hand-me-downs from Dudley were not visible when he unpacked everything he needed from his trunk and then shoved it under his bed, dirty and torn shirts and trousers included.
««»»
On the next morning, Harry woke before anyone else. He wasn’t sure if it was because his body was used to wake up early to cook breakfast for the Dursleys or because his mind was used to wake up early to secure their campsite from Snatchers and such. Either way, he had the bathroom for himself and took his time enjoying a real shower. His back hurt slightly – probably because he wasn’t used to such a soft mattress anymore. It would take some time of getting used to, he knew. It was always like this at the beginning of the school year and the mattress in his cupboard (because you couldn’t even call it a bed) wasn’t nearly as good as the one in Dudley’s second room. He remembered, that it had taken a few days for his body to adjust to the new comfort of even his own bed before and now he had to do it all over again. He didn’t mind, but it didn’t make his settling in in the Slytherin dorms any easier.
He sighed. Slytherin… He never would have thought to see the day, when he was a Slytherin, causally talking to Draco Malfoy and his lackeys in the evening about his home life. It was absurd, quite frankly. And yet again. They were all just kids. None of their voices even broke yet and they were only innocent little first-years.
He didn’t care how, he promised himself he wouldn’t let any innocent child get dragged into this war against their will.
“It’s that Mudblood! Avada Kedavra!”
Maybe he was too naïve, but he didn’t think any of them capable of doing something like this – this time at least. Hadn’t it been for Voldemort, would any of them have grown up to be like that? He preferred to think no, but who could ever know?
“If Goyle doesn’t stop snoring right now, I’ll smother him with a pillow”, Zabini groaned and pressed his hands over his ears.
Harry barely contained a laugh. It was strange, how similar this felt to the Gryffindor dorms. Sure, the red and gold felt more comfortable all in all, but he thought he could come to like the more elegant and clean design of the Slytherin common room fairly soon. Especially because they seemed to grow with them; Even though they were six people, the each of them had enough space for themselves.
“Malfoy, others need to use the bathroom as well! Why did you lock the door? It’s supposed to fit more than one at a time!”, Nott hammered at the door, shouting and Harry smirked, then decided to leave everyone else to their morning routine and headed for the Great Hall to get some breakfast.