Chapter 11
The apartment was too quiet.
Maya sat on the couch, one leg tucked under her, a half-empty glass of wine resting on the coffee table. The dim glow of the city lights filtered through her window, casting soft shadows across the room.
She wasn’t sure why she felt so restless. Maybe it was the conversation with Carina earlier, the way she had opened up—hesitantly, cautiously, but genuinely. There was something about seeing Carina that vulnerable, that real, that made Maya think.
She tilted her head back against the cushions, staring at the ceiling.
Carina had spent so much of her life holding things together, carrying burdens. And in a way, Maya understood that. She understood it more than she cared to admit.
Her fingers traced the rim of her glass as memories stirred—memories she had buried deep.
Lane Bishop.
Her father had once been the center of her universe. His approval, his praise, his expectations. They had shaped her, molded her into the perfect athlete, the disciplined runner, the champion. She had spent years chasing his validation, stretching herself thin just to hear him say, That’s my girl.
But the moment she stopped running—really, truly stopped—he had vanished.
Not physically. He still existed, somewhere out there, still training, still coaching. But to her? He had ghosted her like she was a stranger, like all those years of sacrifice meant nothing if she wasn’t winning anymore.
She exhaled slowly, pressing her palm against her forehead.
She had wanted to be a firefighter. That had been her dream. The kind of job that mattered, that gave her purpose. But Lane had made sure she never had the courage to go for it. He had drilled it into her that her legacy was on the track.
And she had believed him.
Until one day, she didn’t.
And by then, it had felt too late.
Maya let out a small laugh—bitter, quiet. She was sitting here, dwelling on things she couldn’t change, while Carina was out there, still trying to figure out where she belonged. Maybe they weren’t so different after all.
Maybe that was why she couldn’t stop thinking about her.
Carina DeLuca.
She was frustrating, guarded, unpredictable. But she was also incredibly strong, and for all her sarcasm and bravado, she had this quiet kindness, this way of making people feel seen.
Maya had always been drawn to people like that.
With a sigh, she picked up her wine glass and took a slow sip.
She didn’t know what was happening between them—if it was just a tentative friendship, or something more.
But she knew one thing.
Carina made her think. About her past. About her future.
--------------------
Maya stared at the monstrosity in front of her.
A sad, soggy excuse for instant mac and cheese.
The cheese—or whatever passed for cheese—had clumped together in a mess, refusing to blend properly with the overcooked pasta. The entire thing smelled artificial.
Maya poked at it with a fork, sighing. This was just depressing.
Her stomach rumbled, unimpressed by her attempt at late-night nourishment. And that was when the memory hit her—Carina’s lasagna.
Sinfully good lasagna.
Carina had cooked it for her the other night, effortlessly, like it was second nature to her. The smell had filled the entire space, rich and mouthwatering, and Maya had actually groaned at the first bite.
Now, sitting in front of her microwaved disaster, she felt a sudden, overwhelming urge to hear Carina’s voice.
Before she could second-guess herself, she grabbed her phone and called.
The phone barely rang twice before Carina picked up.
"Maya?"
Maya blinked. Carina didn’t sound even remotely sleepy. In fact… she sounded breathless.
Maya frowned. "Uh, hey. Did I wake you?"
There was a slight pause. Then—"No, no, I was just… getting ready for bed."
Maya narrowed her eyes. Something was off. "You don’t sound like someone who was about to sleep."
"I—was stretching," Carina replied, far too quickly.
Maya’s brows furrowed. Stretching? At 2 a.m.? And why did her voice sound a little too… strained? A little too breathy?
And then it clicked.
Oh. Oh.
Maya’s eyes widened in horror, and she immediately pulled the phone away from her ear, staring at it as if it had personally offended her.
Carina wasn’t stretching.
Carina had been… occupied.
With a very specific activity.
With a very specific pink friend.
Maya slapped a hand over her mouth, completely mortified.
Oh my god.
She had just interrupted Carina mid—oh my god.
Carina was still talking, her voice composed now, but Maya wasn’t even listening. She was too busy fighting the overwhelming urge to throw herself out the nearest window.
Finally, she forced herself to clear her throat. "Uh. So. Yeah. Sorry for calling so late. I, um… made bad mac and cheese and thought of your lasagna and…" She cringed. Why am I still talking?
Carina hummed, and Maya could practically hear the smirk in her voice. "Mmm. You called me because you were thinking about my lasagna?"
Maya groaned, rubbing a hand down her face. "Carina, please don’t make this weird."
Carina let out a small chuckle. "Oh, bella, I don’t have to make it weird. You’re doing that all on your own."
Maya wanted to die. Right there. On the spot.
But underneath the embarrassment, there was something else—something warm curling in her stomach. The realization that she had called Carina without even thinking about it. That she had wanted to hear her voice. That Carina had answered immediately, without hesitation.
Even at 2 a.m.
Even in the middle of-well stretching.
Maya swallowed. "I should, uh, let you get back to—stretching."
Carina laughed, low and teasing. "Goodnight, Maya."
Maya hung up so fast she nearly dropped her phone.
Maya stared at her phone, her pulse still erratic.
She should not call back.
She definitely should not call back.
Yet, before her rational brain could catch up, her thumb had already hit redial.
The phone barely rang once before Carina picked up.
"Maya."
Her voice was smooth, amused—like she’d been waiting.
Maya groaned, dragging a hand down her face. "Okay, first of all, shut up."
Carina let out a soft chuckle. "I didn’t say anything."
"You were going to," Maya accused, sinking deeper into her couch, like that might somehow protect her from the absolute mess she was in. "Look, I just—I didn’t mean to interrupt you before."
Carina hummed, the sound dripping with amusement. "Oh? And what exactly do you think you interrupted?"
Maya froze.
Her brain short-circuited, immediately flashing back to the breathlessness in Carina’s voice from before, to the obvious, telltale tone of someone caught in the middle of something very private.
Oh. Oh.
Maya’s entire soul left her body.
She opened her mouth, closed it, then made a strangled noise that wasn’t quite human. "Carina."
Carina laughed—low, throaty, teasing.
"Mmm, you sound nervous, Ma-ya."
Maya exhaled sharply, trying to gather whatever scraps of dignity she had left. "Okay, listen. I called because—because I was thinking about that stupid lasagna, and then I realized how late it was, and I felt bad. And I don’t even know why I called again, except that you sounded weird before, and now I’m just…" She groaned. "I don’t know."
A pause.
Then—"You were thinking about me."
Maya’s face burned. "I was thinking about lasagna."
Carina clicked her tongue. "Mmm, right. The lasagna."
"Yes," Maya insisted, gripping a couch pillow like it might save her. "The food."
"Is that what they’re calling it now?"
Maya whined. "I swear to God, I will hang up—"
"No, no, don’t," Carina interrupted, still laughing.
Maya sighed.
"So, what`s the real reason for keep calling me in the middle of the night…" Carina mused, her voice softer now.
Maya hesitated.
Because I missed your voice.
Because you answered right away, even at 2 a.m.
Because I don’t think I’ve ever had someone like you in my life before.
She exhaled, settling on, "I don’t know."
Carina hummed again, this time not teasing but… understanding.
"Well," she said, "if you ever figure it out, tell me?"
Maya swallowed. "Yeah."
A small pause. Then—
"Goodnight, Maya."
Maya lingered for half a second before murmuring, "Goodnight, Carina."
She hovered over the end call button, ready to let it go, ready to sink into her couch and try to pretend this conversation hadn’t left a weird warmth in her chest.
But then—
She bit her lip.
Closed her eyes.
And before she could stop herself, she blurted out, "So… you weren`t really just stretching, right?"
Silence.
Then—Carina’s laughter, rich and utterly delighted.
"Maya, … are you asking me if I was using a vibrator?"
Maya choked.
"Oh my God!" she hissed, slapping a hand over her face.
Carina was still laughing, fully cackling now.
"You called me back just to ask that? Interesting."
"No! I—ugh!" Maya groaned, absolutely mortified. "Forget I said anything! I'm going to sleep now. Bye!"
"Buonanotte, Maya," Carina purred, far too satisfied with herself.
Maya slammed the call shut, threw her phone across the couch, and buried her face in her hands.
She was never living this down.
-----------------
Maya wasn’t skipping.
Not really.
Okay—maybe just a little.
But it wasn’t her fault that she’d woken up feeling… good. Too good, actually. Like the kind of good that made her whistle on the way to work, sip her coffee with a ridiculous smile, and, yes, maybe bounce a little as she spotted Carina across the set.
It was normal. Totally fine.
And absolutely not because of last night’s conversation.
(Or the pink friend comment she would take to her grave.)
Carina was standing near the catering table, flipping through something on her tablet, looking unfairly perfect for this early in the morning. Her hair was pulled back into a loose bun, a few strands escaping to frame her face, and she was wearing that deep blue blouse that made Maya’s brain short-circuit.
Without thinking, Maya beelined toward her, practically vibrating with energy.
"Carina!"
Carina glanced up, a slow smile spreading across her face as she took in Maya’s obvious enthusiasm. "Buongiorno, Maya. Someone is in a good mood."
Maya huffed, rocking on her heels. "What? I’m just— It’s a nice day."
Carina arched a very knowing eyebrow. "Mmm, is it?"
Maya ignored the heat creeping up her neck. "Yes. And maybe I just like seeing you."
Carina’s smile softened, something unreadable flickering in her eyes. "Well, lucky for you, I actually have a favor to ask."
Maya blinked, momentarily thrown. "A favor?"
Carina sighed dramatically, placing a hand over her heart. "Sì. A terrible burden that only someone strong and capable can help me with."
Maya grinned. "Well, that does sound like me."
Carina chuckled, shaking her head. "I need help with my spice garden. The heavy lifting. Andrea is of no use—he keeps complaining about his delicate hands."
Maya snorted. "Your brother is a surgeon. His hands are kind of important."
"So are my spices," Carina deadpanned.
Maya bit her lip, trying—and failing—not to find that incredibly adorable.
"Okay, so let me get this straight," Maya said, crossing her arms. "You want me to come over and do manual labor?"
"Sì."
"In the dirt?"
"Mhmm."
Maya smirked. "Is this just a clever way to get me sweaty and shirtless in your backyard?"
Carina’s lips twitched, eyes darkening just enough to make Maya’s stomach flip. "You say that like it would be a bad thing."
Maya opened her mouth, then closed it.
Her brain had officially left the chat.
Carina laughed at her silence, tapping Maya’s chin lightly with one finger. "So? Are you in?"
Maya straightened up, pushing past the flustered mess inside her. "Are you kidding? I love a project. And I’ll probably do it better than Andrea and faster."
"I don’t doubt that," Carina mused, pleased.
Maya grinned, already imagining herself showing off her lifting skills. "When do we start?"
"Tomorrow." Carina smirked. "Bring muscles and an appetite. I’ll cook."
Maya beamed. "Done."
And just like that, her day somehow got even better.
----------------------
Maya didn’t know what she was expecting when Carina had mentioned her spice garden. Maybe a few potted plants here and there, a tiny patch of basil and rosemary, something quaint and cute.
She was so wrong.
Maya pulled up to Carina’s house the next afternoon, eyes wide as she stared at the sprawling garden before her. It was a full-fledged operation. There were raised garden beds, tall trellises for climbing plants, and, in the far corner, what looked like a small greenhouse. The smell of fresh herbs and soil filled the air, and she could hear the distant sound of water trickling from an outdoor fountain.
Carina was standing on the porch, looking far too relaxed in a pair of well-worn jeans and a loose, white shirt that seemed to be made for this kind of setting. Her dark hair was tied back in a messy ponytail, a few strands falling forward as she waved Maya over.
"Well, welcome to my humble spice empire."
Maya blinked, slowly shaking her head. "This is... this is huge."
Carina’s eyes twinkled. "I may have gotten a little carried away."
Maya raised an eyebrow, scanning the expansive garden. "A little?"
Carina smiled, already heading toward the nearest raised bed. "Okay, okay, it’s a lot, but I promise it’s worth it. I need help with the heavy lifting—moving some pots around, repotting the plants that are getting too big for their containers. And maybe... we can fix up the trellis area. Some of my plants are being a little too wild."
Maya cracked her knuckles, practically bouncing on her feet. "Let’s get to it."
She rolled up her sleeves, her fingers already itching to get to work. She moved to the nearest raised bed, her hands brushing over the rich soil. Carina had been right—this garden was a full-on operation, and Maya had no idea how one person could manage it all.
“Okay, so where do you want me to start?” Maya asked, brushing her palms against her thighs.
Carina grinned, pulling a small, weathered trowel from the side of the bed. “Well, I figured you’d be good with the heavy stuff, so if you want to start by moving those pots over there... I’ve been meaning to rearrange them.”
Maya followed her gaze to a row of large ceramic pots, their colorful surfaces contrasting with the greenery surrounding them. She nodded, ready to dive in.
As she moved the first pot, she felt Carina’s gaze on her. It wasn’t just the casual, friendly observation—it was something more. Something that sent a slight shiver down her spine.
---------------
Carina was a natural at this. She had a way of moving through the garden as if she were one with it, her grace evident in every step she took. Maya couldn’t help but notice how her shirt clung to her as she bent down to adjust a creeping vine, the fabric shifting over her toned back.
Maya turned away quickly, shifting another pot into place. Focus, she told herself. This is just a garden.
But it wasn’t just the garden that kept drawing her attention. It was Carina—her beauty and the way she spoke in that very sexy Italian accent.
Eventually Carina directed Maya to the trellis area. Maya could see the challenge—some of the vines had wound themselves in ways that made them nearly impossible to untangle without risking damage.
Carina leaned in close as she demonstrated how to carefully remove a few vines. Maya’s breath caught in her throat when Carina’s hand brushed hers. There was an unmistakable spark.
Carina didn’t pull away immediately. Instead, she met Maya’s eyes, a soft smile playing on her lips. “Careful there. Some of these vines can be a bit... wild.”
Maya swallowed, her throat suddenly dry. “I can handle it.”
Their eyes locked for a moment, and Maya could see the flicker of something in Carina’s gaze—a quiet curiosity, maybe even something deeper.
Carina turned back to the trellis, her body almost brushing against Maya’s as they worked side by side. The proximity was intoxicating. Maya could smell Carina`s perfume mixing with the earthy scent of the garden. Every movement Carina made seemed so effortless, and Maya found herself leaning in a little closer.
“Hey, Maya,” Carina’s voice broke through the moment, her tone light. “You’re doing great, you know...”
Maya chuckled. “Well, I’ve always liked getting my hands dirty.”
Carina smirked, her eyes glinting mischievously. “I can tell. I am also very good with my hands.”
--------------
The next few hours passed in a blur of dirt and laughter. Maya was in her element. She could already feel the muscles in her arms protesting from the heavy lifting, but it felt so good to be doing something physical.
They spent most of the afternoon moving pots, shifting soil, and replacing some of the herbs. Maya found herself genuinely invested in making sure the plants were properly tended to, even feeling a little proud when the rows of containers were perfectly organized.
"You really know what you’re doing," Maya said, wiping a smear of dirt from her cheek.
Carina gave her a look, clearly amused. "I mean, I’d hope so. I’ve been doing this for years." She pulled a small plant from its pot, gently inspecting the roots before placing it in a larger one. "I’ve got a bit of an obsession with fresh herbs."
Maya nodded, rolling her sleeves up higher. "I can see why. There’s something calming about it. It’s all so... organic."
Carina smiled softly, eyes lingering on the garden. "Esattamente."
By the time the sun began to dip below the horizon, the garden looked even more spectacular.
Carina surveyed the work with a contented sigh. "Not bad for a couple of hours, huh?"
Maya wiped the sweat from her brow, grinning. "Not bad at all. I’m feeling pretty accomplished right now."
Carina turned to face her, that signature teasing smile playing on her lips. "Well, now that you’ve worked up an appetite, I suppose I should keep my promise. Dinner?"
Maya’s stomach rumbled at the mention of food, her eyes lighting up. "You’re cooking?"
Carina nodded. "Lasagna."
Maya’s mouth watered at the thought of it. "You really know how to spoil a girl, huh?"
Carina shrugged, nonchalantly walking toward the back door.
--------------
After the last bite of lasagna, Maya stood up with a contented sigh, stretching her arms above her head. She was stuffed, but the satisfaction of a job well done had her feeling energized.
"So," Maya began, rubbing her hands together, "we still got some work left, right?"
Carina watched her from across the room, leaning back slightly in her chair as she observed Maya. There was something about her—something that made it hard for Carina to focus on anything else. muscles in her arms flexed as she moved, the small bits of dirt still clinging to her skin making her look... well, hot.
Carina’s gaze lingered longer than it should have. She found herself thinking about Maya's body—the way her jeans fit, how her shirt stretched just a little too tightly across her shoulders, how her hair, slightly messy from the work they’d done, framed her face in the most captivating way.
She quickly shook her head, trying to focus, but the thoughts kept creeping in. Thoughts she definitely shouldn’t be having.
Maya’s voice broke through her spiraling thoughts. “You okay there, Carina?”
Carina blinked, her heart jumping in her chest. She forced a smile, straightening in her seat. “Yeah, just—thinking.”
Maya raised an eyebrow. “About?”
Focus, Carina. Focus.
She swallowed, shaking her head again, attempting to clear away the thoughts that were starting to make her pulse race.
"Carina?" Maya asked, voice softer this time.
Carina turned toward her, plastering on another smile, though it felt far too forced. “I’m fine, really. Just—just give me a second. I’ll catch up.”
Maya glanced at her, her expression thoughtful but unbothered. “Alright. I’ll get started on the rest of this, then.”
Carina watched her again, her heart hammering a little faster. She was doing her best to keep it together, but she couldn’t deny the growing tension she felt as Maya went outside to continue the work.
She shouldn’t be feeling like this. But Carina’s mind—her body—had other ideas.
With a soft breath, Carina followed Maya, trying to busy herself with organizing the nearby gardening tools, anything to distract herself from the heat building in her chest.
But the damage was already done.
These feelings were too new, too complicated, and she wasn’t sure she could jump straight into them.
She exhaled slowly, watching Maya work for a second before she moved toward the outdoor kitchen area, grabbing a bottle of Aperol from the shelf and the sparkling wine that she always kept on hand. She was in the mood for a spritz—light and refreshing, perfect for a moment of relaxation.
As she worked, mixing the Aperol with the Prosecco and soda water, she again glanced over at Maya, who was wiping her hands off on a rag, looking satisfied but still bustling with energy.
Carina swallowed hard as she finished preparing the drinks, pushing the thought aside. She handed Maya a glass. “Here. A little spritz to cool off. You earned it.”
Maya’s eyes lit up, and a small smile tugged at her lips. “I’m so ready for this. Thank you.”
Carina watched closely as Maya took a long sip, practically gulping the drink down. "Whoa. You seem thirsty."
Maya wiped her mouth, eyes slightly wide as she set the glass down. “I was.” She grinned. “This is amazing. Seriously, I’ve never had anything so good as this, I like it.”
Carina raised an eyebrow, still watching her. Maya’s cheeks were flushed, she looked at the drink, then back at Carina...
"Glad you like it," Carina said, trying to keep her tone steady, but her mind was starting to race.
Maya took another sip. And another. The glass was empty in no time, and she placed it down with a satisfied sigh. "I think I need another," Maya said, reaching for the bottle.
Carina's eyes widened. “Uh, Maya—maybe just a small one?” she said, stepping forward. “You’ve already had quite a bit, and it’s pretty strong…”
But Maya was already filling her glass. “Oh, come on. One more won’t hurt, right?” Her voice was a little too chipper.
Carina felt a knot tighten in her stomach. She knew how much alcohol was in those drinks, and even though it was refreshing, it was strong—too strong for someone who wasn’t used to it.
As the seconds ticked by, Carina’s concern grew. Maya’s posture was slowly shifting, her steps becoming a little less coordinated, her words slurring slightly as she tried to hold her glass steady. She was smiling, but there was a new, almost flirtatious edge to it.
Maya giggled, swaying slightly on her feet. “You know, you’re really pretty, Carina,” she said, a little too loud, her blue eyes now fixed on Carina with a focused intensity.
Carina’s stomach flipped, and her pulse quickened.
Maya took a step forward, bumping into Carina’s side. “I’ve been meaning to tell you that for a while now,” she continued, her voice low and teasing. “I don’t know, there’s just something about you, you know?”
Carina tried to take a step back, but Maya moved with her, her eyes bright. “You’ve got this... this energy. It’s... it’s magnetic.” Maya reached out and brushed her fingers lightly over Carina’s arm, the touch lingering longer than it should have. “Like... I don’t know, you’re just kind of...perfect.”
Carina froze, her heart pounding in her ears. She wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or if Maya really meant what she was saying, but the whole situation felt like it was spinning out of control. She quickly grabbed Maya’s arm, gently pulling it away from her.
“Maya, you’re drunk,” Carina said, her voice low, trying to steady herself. “You’ve had enough.”
Maya swayed a bit, her eyes narrowing as if in disbelief. “What? I’m fine. Just... just trying to tell you how I feel.” Her voice was slurred, and there was a hint of frustration in her expression.
Carina could feel herself growing tense, her hands shaking slightly as she tried to maintain control of the situation. She needed to get Maya to calm down. She needed her to stop before this went any further.
“You’re not fine. You’ve had too much to drink.” Carina took a deep breath, stepping back slightly, her eyes darting around the garden as if looking for an escape.
But Maya was persistent, following her with a playful grin. “Come on, Carina,” she said, a smirk tugging at the corner of her lips. “You can’t tell me you don’t feel it. There’s this... spark between us.”
Carina’s breath hitched, and she felt heat flood her cheeks, but she kept her composure, gently but firmly guiding Maya to a nearby bench. “Sit. Per favore.”
Maya lowered herself ontot he bench, looking up at Carina with a soft, doe-eyed expression, clearly not fully aware of what she was saying or doing.
Carina took a few steps back, her chest tight with both concern and something else she didn’t want to acknowledge. “I think you need to sleep this off, no?”
Maya looked up at her, blinking slowly, her lips curving into a mischievous grin. “You don’t have to act so... professional all the time, Carina.” She wiggled her eyebrows playfully. “We’re both adults.”
Carina nodded, her heart hammering in her chest. “I know,” she said gently. “Just... take it easy, alright? Let’s get you some water.”
As Maya closed her eyes, a soft sigh escaping her lips, Carina couldn’t help but feel a weight settle on her shoulders. They couldn’t go down this road.
Carina had managed to fetch Maya a glass of water in hand, hoping it would help sober her up. Maya's head lolled back against the seat, her eyes half-closed, the alcohol still very much in her system.
Carina paced the small area near the bench, trying to calm her racing thoughts. She had seen it before—people drunk off their guard, revealing things they wouldn't normally say, letting their emotions spill out in ways that often didn’t make sense in the light of day.
Maya, however, wasn’t thinking like that. Her mind was spinning with emotions she couldn’t quite process, but the alcohol had loosened her tongue. She leaned forward suddenly, her eyes bright but slightly unfocused as she stared at Carina.
"Carina," she mumbled, her voice slurred but somehow clear enough to make Carina stop in her tracks. "Carina, listen... there's something else I need to say."
Carina looked at Maya with caution in her gaze, her heart picking up speed. “Maya, maybe you should get some rest…”
But Maya wasn’t having it. She blinked a few times and then pushed herself off the bench with an unsteady lurch, her hand gripping the side of the seat to steady herself.
“I’m not tired,” Maya slurred, her words slow but insistent. “I’m just… just thinking about-...”
Carina remained standing a few feet away, her arms crossed tightly across her chest. "What are you thinking about?" she asked, keeping her voice calm but with a tight edge.
Maya swayed a little as she took a step toward Carina, her face serious now. “About you, Carina. About us,” she added, her words fumbling out. “I’ve been thinking about this for a while, you know? A long time.”
Carina froze, her breath catching in her throat. What is she saying?
“I…” Maya stumbled over her words, her breath coming out in a slow exhale as she tried to focus. “I think I’m in love with you, Carina.”
The words hit Carina like a tidal wave, knocking the air out of her lungs. She blinked rapidly, unsure if she had heard her correctly. Her first instinct was to laugh it off, to push it aside as just another result of Maya’s drunken state. But there was something in Maya’s eyes—something raw and genuine—that stopped her.
Carina`s heart was beating in her chest like a drum, and she felt a heat rise in her face. Maya... Maya’s in love?
Maya, oblivious to Carina’s internal turmoil, took a wobbly step closer, her voice growing more earnest, though still laced with the unsteady edge of intoxication. “I know it’s crazy. I know. I mean, we’ve just... just started talking, and... I don’t even know why I’m saying this right now but... but I can’t stop thinking about you, Carina.”
The way she said her name sent a shiver down Carina’s spine, her pulse quickening. She felt a lump form in her throat.
Maya’s face softened, the usual sharp edges of her demeanor slipping away in the haze of alcohol. “You’re so different. So... real. And I think that’s what scares me. I’ve never felt like this before about someone... and it’s like I can’t control it, you know?”
Carina stood frozen, unsure of how to react. Her hands trembled. Maya was clearly intoxicated, but the weight of her words—I’m in love with you—kept echoing in Carina’s mind.
“Don’t look at me like that,” Maya muttered suddenly, pulling her gaze away from Carina. “Like I’m some idiot. I just… I had to say it.”
She’s drunk, Carina reminded herself. She doesn’t mean it like this.
Yet, the vulnerability in Maya’s voice had a strange pull on her. Carina took a deep breath and finally spoke, her voice coming out quieter than she had intended.
“Maya, you’re drunk,” she said, her words slow, trying to keep the tension from creeping into her tone. “You’re not thinking clearly.”
Maya looked up at her. She took a step closer, swaying slightly, her hand reaching out and brushing lightly against Carina’s face.
“I am thinking very clearly,” Maya whispered, her voice low and almost pleading. “I wouldn’t say this if I didn’t mean it, Carina. And I don’t know how to make that stop, even if I wanted to.” She let out a soft, almost bitter laugh. “You make me feel things...”
Carina felt the warmth of Maya’s hand on her skin, but she couldn’t move. Her heart was racing, her chest tight with emotion, but she knew she couldn’t let this moment be real—not like this, not when Maya was like this.
This isn’t real, Carina told herself again, her thoughts swirling. This is just the alcohol talking. She doesn’t really feel this way.
Still, despite her attempts to rationalize, something inside Carina stirred—something she couldn’t ignore. Maya was looking at her like she was the only person in the world, her eyes filled with that tender, confused longing.
“Just... just sleep on it, okay?” Carina said softly, almost pleading with herself. “We’ll talk in the morning. You’re just... drunk.”
Maya nodded slowly, her eyes flickering as she finally seemed to register Carina’s words. “Yeah… okay,” she muttered, her voice softer now, almost disappointed. But she didn’t pull away. Instead, she rested her head against Carina’s shoulder for a brief moment, a gentle, quiet gesture that sent Carina’s heart spiraling.
The cool night air danced through the garden as the evening's stars blinked softly overhead. Carina knew she needed to get Maya to bed.
"Alright," Carina said, her voice steadier than she felt, "Let’s get you to the guest bedroom."
Maya was swaying on her feet, blinking as if trying to shake off the haze of her intoxication. But before Carina could even make a move, Maya shook her head with an exaggerated dramatic flair, her eyes full of mischief.
“No, no,” Maya slurred, her hand reaching out toward Carina, grabbing her sleeve lightly. “I want to sleep with you.”
Carina froze for a second. “Maya, let’s just get you to the guest room. You’ll be more comfortable—”
But before Carina could finish, Maya broke free from her grip, stumbling forward and making a beeline for Carina’s bedroom.
"Maya!" Carina called, hurrying behind her. “You really shouldn’t be—"
But Maya was already in the room, making her way to the bed, her steps slow but determined. She plopped down onto Carina’s bed, sighing dramatically as she sprawled out on the sheets. Maya closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, a contented smile spreading across her face as she nuzzled into the comforter, her hair falling around her face like a tangled mess.
Carina stood in the doorway, utterly speechless. This is not happening.
“God,” Maya murmured, her voice soft but slurred, “You smell so good.” She nuzzled deeper into the pillow, clearly enjoying the sensation. “Like… like home. You smell like… everything I didn’t know I wanted.”
Carina’s heart skipped a beat at the words, her chest tightening, though she knew it wasn’t the right time to let her emotions get the better of her. Maya was still drunk, and this moment—no matter how sweet or confusing—was not reality.
But Maya wasn’t done. As if on instinct, she reached up toward Carina with a lazy smile, her voice barely above a whisper. “Tuck me in, Carina. I’m cold,” she said, her eyes heavy-lidded but expectant. “Please?”
Carina felt a strange warmth bubble up in her chest at the request. She hesitated for a moment, then nodded slowly, moving toward the bed. It felt wrong, and yet so right, to obey her request. She pulled the covers up and tucked them around Maya’s body, making sure she was warm enough.
But then, in a move that took Carina completely by surprise, Maya’s hand shot out and grabbed her arm. Before Carina could react, Maya yanked her down, pulling her onto the bed beside her with a sudden, strong motion that sent Carina’s heart into overdrive. Carina barely had time to catch herself as she landed next to Maya, her body now pressed flush against hers.
Carina’s breath hitched. She tried to pull away, but Maya’s grip tightened, and with a playful yet possessive tug, she dragged Carina closer, curling her body into hers like she was craving warmth and comfort.
“Stay,” Maya mumbled, her voice muffled against Carina’s shirt. “I want you.”
Carina’s mind raced, her pulse thumping in her ears as she processed the situation.
Maya’s arms wrapped around Carina, pulling her into an embrace that felt too intimate, too close for comfort. Carina could feel her body tense, not from resistance, but from the sheer closeness. She hadn’t been this close to anyone in so long—no one had ever just curled up against her like this, without barriers, without hesitation.
Carina’s mind was spinning. She could feel Maya’s breath on her skin, warm and steady, her body pressed so close that Carina couldn’t tell where her own skin ended, and Maya’s began. The intoxicating scent of Maya’s shampoo and the light remnants of alcohol filled the air, and Carina couldn’t help but inhale deeply, feeling something inside her twist in ways she wasn’t prepared for.
What is happening? Carina’s thoughts raced, but her body stayed still, rooted to the spot, unsure of whether to pull away or let herself relax into the embrace. Maya was clearly half-asleep, her breathing slow and even, though her arms were still wrapped tightly around Carina, as though she was afraid to let go.
Carina’s heart hammered in her chest, and she tried to control her breath. She needed to keep things under control, especially now, but everything in her body screamed at her to hold onto this moment, to enjoy the warmth of Maya’s body against hers, to let herself feel what she had been holding back for so long.
But what if it was just the alcohol? What if tomorrow morning, Maya wouldn’t even remember this moment, this closeness?
Don’t think too much about it, Carina told herself.
Still, as Maya snuggled closer, her face now nestled into Carina’s chest, Carina felt a surge of protectiveness rise in her chest. She couldn’t explain why, but she felt a sudden, intense urge to keep her safe and to keep her close.
Carina gently placed her arm around Maya, trying not to overthink it. She closed her eyes, her mind still racing, but her body finally settling into the moment. Tomorrow, Carina thought. We’ll talk about it tomorrow.
--------------
Maya awoke to a slow and groggy realization. Her head was pounding, and her mouth felt dry, like a desert. She blinked, trying to focus, but all she could see were soft, hazy edges of the room.
Her thoughts were a muddled mess from the night before, but as her senses began to sharpen, one detail cut through the fog of her mind with alarming clarity.
There was something warm beneath her.
What the hell? she thought, trying to move but finding it difficult to lift her head from the soft surface beneath her. Her arms felt heavy, like they were wrapped around something—or someone. And when she moved slightly, a gentle, steady breathing tickled her ear.
A wave of panic surged through Maya as the realization hit her. She slowly, carefully, dared to look down and see what she was holding onto. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw Carina’s arm resting by her side, her body half-curled underneath Maya's.
Maya was wrapped around Carina like a koala, her legs intertwined with hers, one arm draped over Carina’s waist, and her face pressed into the crook of Carina's neck. Her whole body screamed too close, and yet the warmth, the comfort, felt so familiar that it took her breath away.
Oh no... no no no no.
She immediately pulled back, her face flushing with embarrassment, but as she did, she noticed Carina’s soft, even breathing. Carina was still asleep, her body completely at ease despite Maya's tight grip.
Maya froze for a moment, unsure of what to do. She could hear the rapid beating of her own heart, a mix of adrenaline and mortification. Did I really...?
She had no memory of climbing into Carina's bed—let alone holding her this way—but she knew that she had. It wasn’t a nightmare. It wasn’t some drunken fantasy. It was real.
Her stomach churned, a knot forming as she tried to silently untangle herself from Carina without waking her. But Maya’s head was spinning from the alcohol, her movements clumsy, and it didn’t take long for her to jostle Carina just a little too much.
Carina shifted, her eyes fluttering open as her hand instinctively reached up to rub her face. She seemed disoriented at first, then looked down at the situation with surprise.
Maya froze, wide-eyed, her heart hammering in her chest. "C-Carina... I—"
Carina didn’t immediately pull away. Instead, she took a deep breath and let out a soft, sleepy laugh. "Buongiorno," she said, her voice still husky from sleep. "I take it last night’s alcohol hit harder than expected?"
Maya’s face turned an embarrassing shade of crimson. "Oh my god, I—I didn’t mean to... I didn’t think... I just..." Her voice trailed off, failing to form any coherent thoughts.
Carina smiled, but there was something in her brown eyes—an amused, understanding look, as if she wasn’t exactly surprised by this turn of events. “Hey, it’s okay,” she said, her tone gentle.
"I—I can’t believe I did that," Maya muttered, trying to completely wriggle free from Carina`s body, but Carina’s hand gently rested on her arm, not letting her pull away too quickly.
"It’s really not a big deal, Maya," Carina said softly, her voice carrying a calmness that only made Maya feel even more exposed. "You were drunk. You just wanted to feel safe. I get it."
Maya shook her head, still unable to look Carina in the eye. Feel safe—that wasn’t just about sleep, was it? But she was too afraid to ask, too afraid to hear the answer she wasn’t ready for.
Carina didn’t seem to mind, though. She was still smiling, although there was a flicker of something else behind her gaze—something unreadable.
"Do you want some coffee?" Carina asked, shifting slightly beneath Maya to untangle herself from the situation. “I think we both need it.”
Maya hesitated for a moment, her mind a whirlwind of emotions. “Yeah,” she said softly.
Carina’s hand was still lightly touching Maya’s arm, and it took a moment for Maya to realize that she wasn’t the only one who was flustered. She couldn’t help but notice the faint blush on Carina’s cheeks, the way she seemed to avert her gaze for just a second, and Maya’s heart skipped again, this time for a different reason.
Carina was just as affected by this closeness as Maya was.
Before either of them could say anything else, Carina carefully untangled herself from Maya’s arms and swung her legs over the side of the bed. “Let’s just get some coffee and forget about this,” she said with a wink, her voice now light and teasing, though Maya could still sense the undercurrent of something more between them. “I’ll pretend this never happened if you do.”
Maya sat up slowly, watching Carina make her way to the door with a casual stride, though her heart was still racing.
----------------
Maya sat at the kitchen table, her hands wrapped around the warm coffee mug, but she barely took a sip. The night before played on repeat in her head, each detail making her cringe harder than the last. She had woken up on top of Carina, holding her like a human-sized teddy bear.
And worse? Carina hadn’t pushed her away.
Maya had no idea how long Carina had been awake last night after having been stuck under her weight. What if Carina had been uncomfortable? What if she’d felt trapped and hadn’t known how to get away?
Maya swallowed hard, looking up at Carina, who stood by the counter pouring herself more espresso. The morning light streamed through the window, catching in Carina’s still slightly messy curls. She looked annoyingly radiant for someone who had just woken up after being held hostage all night.
Maya cleared her throat, her voice hesitant. “Hey, uh… about last night.”
Carina turned, arching a perfect eyebrow. “Mhm?”
Maya forced herself to meet her eyes. “I—I just wanted to say I’m really sorry.” She set the coffee down, rubbing the back of her neck. “I didn’t mean to, you know, invade your space like that. I was drunk and clearly didn’t know what I was doing, but still… I shouldn’t have just climbed into your bed like that.”
Carina took a slow sip of her coffee, watching Maya carefully, her expression unreadable. “Maya…”
Maya rushed on, feeling the heat of embarrassment creep up her neck. “And I don’t know if I, like, trapped you or something, but if you felt like you had to stay there, I just—”
“Maya.” Carina set her mug down, cutting her off with a small smile.
Maya shut her mouth, nervously bouncing her knee under the table.
Carina stepped closer, tilting her head slightly. “You think I was lying there all night, suffering? That I was waiting for you to wake up so I could escape?”
Maya blinked. “...Weren’t you?”
Carina let out a soft laugh, shaking her head. “No, Maya. If I had wanted to move, I would have.” She leaned against the counter, crossing her arms. “I actually…” She trailed off for a second before offering a small shrug. “I kind of enjoyed it.”
Maya froze.
Carina had enjoyed it?
Her brain stuttered over the words, trying to process them. “You—wait. You enjoyed being trapped under my drunk, clingy self?”
Carina’s smile deepened. “Mmm. You were very warm and sweet.”
Maya’s entire body tensed, her face burning hotter than the coffee in her hands. Sweet? Sweet?!
Carina continued hesitantly, “It’s not every day I wake up with someone wrapped around me like that. It was… nice.”
Maya opened her mouth, then shut it. Then opened it again. Nothing.
Carina chuckled at her reaction and took another sip of coffee before adding playfully, “Though next time, you should at least buy me dinner first.”
Maya groaned, dropping her head into her hands. “Oh my god. I’m never drinking again.”
Carina laughed, soft and warm. “Oh, don’t say that. I think last night turned out pretty well.”
Maya peeked up at her, still feeling entirely out of her depth. Well? This wasn’t well.
But the way Carina was looking at her, teasing but also genuine, made something in her chest flutter in a way that scared her.
--------------
Maya had finally managed to calm the chaos in her brain. Mostly. She was still internally screaming about waking up wrapped around Carina, but at least she could hold a conversation now.
Carina sat across from her at the table, her expression thoughtful. The playful teasing from earlier had settled into something softer, more serious.
Then, out of nowhere, Carina asked, “Are we friends now?”
Maya blinked, caught off guard. “What?”
Carina lifted her gaze, her brown eyes searching Maya’s face. “You and me. Are we friends?”
Maya felt something tighten in her chest. She hadn’t expected that. She’d expected more teasing, maybe a smug comment about her drunk confession last night. But this?
Why did it feel so… sad?
Maya forced a small laugh, hoping to lighten the mood. “You have to ask?”
Carina gave a small, hesitant shrug. “Well… I don’t know.” She took a sip of her coffee, then looked down at the swirling liquid as if it held answers. “I like spending time with you, but I wasn’t sure if you saw it the same way. If this was just… something temporary.”
Maya’s stomach twisted.
Carina wasn’t sure if they were friends.
The thought hurt more than it should have. It made her think about how easily people left. How quickly things changed. How she’d spent most of her life keeping people at arm’s length because getting close always led to getting hurt.
And now, Carina was sitting in front of her, admitting she didn’t even know if they were real friends.
Maya swallowed, her throat tight. “Of course, we’re friends,” she said, her voice quieter than usual. “I mean… I thought that was obvious.”
Carina’s lips quirked up slightly, but the uncertainty still lingered in her expression. “Maybe I just wanted to hear you say it.”
Maya exhaled, then sat up straighter, meeting Carina’s gaze directly. “We’re friends,” she said firmly, leaving no room for doubt. “And not just temporary friends. I mean it.”
Carina studied her for a moment, then smiled—really smiled this time. Warm and genuine.
“Okay,” she said softly.
Maya let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding.
Carina had actually asked if they were friends. As if it wasn’t obvious. As if Maya hadn’t been drawn to her from the start, like some kind of force she didn’t fully understand. As if Carina truly didn’t expect people to stay.
The thought made Maya’s chest ache.
“You really had to ask?” Maya finally said, frowning. “Carina, you do realize people want to be your friend, right? You’re—” she gestured vaguely, “—you’re amazing.”
Carina laughed softly, but there was something a little sad underneath it. “You’d be surprised,” she murmured, taking another sip of her coffee.
Maya tilted her head. “What do you mean?”
Carina hesitated. Then she sighed. “I don’t have many close friends, Maya.” She smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “I mean, I have colleagues, acquaintances… but real friends?” She shrugged. “There’s just Gabriella.”
Maya frowned. “Gabriella? Your ex-sex friend?”
“My best friend,” Carina said simply. Then, after a pause, she added, “And my ex-girlfriend.”
Maya felt something weird twist in her stomach at that second part.
“She lives in Italy,” Carina continued. “We dated years ago, but we realized we were better as friends. She’s a doctor, too—works in emergency medicine.” Carina smiled fondly, but there was a tinge of longing in it. “She’s the only person who really knows me, besides my baby brother of course. But he is family.”
Maya didn’t like the sound of that. Not because of the ex-thing (okay, maybe a little because of the ex-thing), but because Carina said it like it was just fact. Like she’d already decided that she wasn’t allowed to have more than one real friend.
“That’s ridiculous,” Maya said before she could stop herself.
Carina blinked. “What?”
“You said she’s the only person who knows you.” Maya shook her head. “That’s not true.”
Carina studied her for a moment. “No?”
Maya swallowed, suddenly hyper-aware of the weight of her own words. But she meant them.
“No,” she said firmly. “Because I want to know you, too.”
Carina’s expression softened, something unreadable flickering in her eyes. There was something about the way Maya looked at her—so open, so earnest—that made her feel… safe.
Maybe that was why, for the first time in a long time, she found herself wanting to say more.
“You know,” Carina started slowly, “Gabriella isn’t my only ex-girlfriend.”
Maya raised an eyebrow. “I figured.”
Carina chuckled. “Fair.” She took a breath. “There was someone else. A woman I… thought I had something real with.”
Maya straightened a little. “What happened?”
Carina let out a small, humorless laugh. “Arizona happened.”
Maya frowned. “Arizona?”
“Arizona Robbins.” Carina glanced at Maya, waiting for recognition, but when Maya just blinked, she sighed. “She’s a pediatric surgeon. Brilliant. Beautiful. Confident.” She exhaled slowly. “And for a while, I thought I was in love with her.”
Maya’s stomach twisted again, just like when Carina had mentioned Gabriella. She hated that feeling.
“So… why didn’t it work out?” she asked, trying to sound casual.
Carina pursed her lips. “Because I wasn’t really me to her,” she admitted. “I was just… the exotic Italian woman she could add to her list of experiences.”
Maya frowned, leaning forward. “She said that?”
“Not in those exact words,” Carina said. “But I could feel it. I was something new, something different for her.” She shook her head. “I wanted more, but eventually, I realized I was just not what she wanted.”
Maya’s jaw clenched. “That’s—” she huffed, running a hand through her hair. “That’s really shitty.”
Carina smirked. “It is.” She sighed. “And it made me wonder if that’s all I would ever be to people. A fantasy. A temporary distraction.”
Maya’s chest tightened.
She hated that Carina had ever felt that way.
“You’re so much more than that,” Maya said firmly.
Carina looked up, startled.
Maya swallowed, forcing herself to hold Carina’s gaze. “I don’t know how anyone could spend five minutes with you and not see how incredible you are.” Her voice softened. “You deserve more than someone who just wants an experience with you.”
Carina’s breath caught for just a second. She wasn’t sure anyone had ever said something like that to her before.
For the first time in a long time, she wanted to believe it.
And the way Maya was looking at her? Like she was worth something?
Maybe—just maybe—she could.
Carina sighed, her fingers tightening around her coffee cup. She had already said more than she intended, but with Maya sitting across from her, looking at her like she actually mattered, the words kept coming.
“She also made fun of my accent.”
Maya’s head snapped up. “What?”
Carina gave a small, hollow laugh. “Arizona. She would tease me about my English. About the way I pronounced things. At first, I thought she was just joking, but after a while…” She trailed off, shaking her head.
Maya’s brows furrowed. “Hold on—you mean, she actually made fun of you? Like, in a mean way?”
Carina swallowed. “She would imitate me sometimes. Exaggerate my words. Laugh when I said something wrong.” She let out a shaky breath. “It made me feel… stupid. Like I was always less than her. Always a little behind. A little wrong.”
Maya’s stomach twisted. “Carina…”
“I know it sounds silly,” Carina murmured, rubbing her temple. “But I’ve been insecure about my English for a long time. I’ve studied so hard to sound fluent, to be taken seriously. And when someone you care about laughs at you for something you can’t change…” She exhaled sharply. “It sticks.”
Maya was quiet for a second, but only because she was trying not to explode.
“She’s a complete asshole.”
Carina blinked at the sheer force of Maya’s words.
“I’m serious,” Maya continued, sitting forward. “Your accent is beautiful. And anyone who makes you feel bad about it? They don’t deserve to be in your life.”
Carina gave her a small, skeptical look. “You don’t have to—”
“No, I do,” Maya interrupted. “Because I’ve never thought your accent was anything but amazing. And honestly?” She smirked slightly. “It’s kind of unfair how hot it is.”
Carina’s lips parted slightly, and Maya instantly realized what she’d just said.
Heat rushed to her face. “I mean—uh—”
Carina suddenly chuckled, shaking her head. “You are very bad at filtering your thoughts, bella.”
Maya groaned, covering her face. “Yeah, well… it’s true.” She peeked through her fingers, voice softer now. “And I mean the first part too. You shouldn’t feel insecure about your accent. It’s part of who you are, and who you are is incredible.”
Carina felt something tighten in her chest.
She had never expected Maya Bishop to be this… soft.
Maybe—just maybe—Maya was someone safe to let in.