Mettle
Yaz’s heart thundered. It pounded in her ears, her own personal Cloister Bell. She was frozen to the spot. It was all up to her. The Doctor’s survival, the family’s survival, her own survival. Her eyes were drawn to the Doctor, a magnet pull, desperately scanning for signs of life. Or signs of golden wisps of regeneration energy. She knew the Doctor had incredible healing abilities, but rational thought was overridden at the constant trickle of blood dripping from the blonde’s mouth on to the floor.
Yaz took a deep breath. She had to push thoughts of the Doctor to the back of her mind. Needed to focus. Let her police instincts kick in. This was essentially a hostage situation. Except she appeared to be one of the hostages too. Her mind raced. She didn’t know what to do. She clenched her fists to hide her shaking hands.
Ashad’s mouth twisted into a grotesque sneer.
“Your fear is inefficient.”
Yaz took an instinctive step back. Ashad let out a broken, mechanical laugh. He stepped forwards, almost gleefully getting into Yaz’s space. Towering menacingly over her.
“You will be converted.”
“You couldn’t even convert yourself, mate.”
Despite her confident words, Yaz’s voice trembled. Enough to betray her. Ashad heard it. He tilted his head, considering her before taking another step forward. Yaz stood her ground. Her jaw tightened as she tried to school her face, to project confidence.
"You believe you can stop me. You are mistaken."
He stepped forwards again, so close she could feel his rancid breath on her face. Her muscles screamed at her to run, but she forced herself to stand firm and to look him in the eye. She had to act, to do something. Her thumb instinctively rubbed over the palm of her hand, where she’d once written WWTDD. She took a deep breath. She knew what the Doctor would do. She’d give them the opportunity to do the right thing.
"I know I can’t stop you. Not properly. But I also know you’re not all Cyberman. Not yet. You can still feel, can’t you?"
For the first time Ashad faltered. His breathing became uneven. He was so close Yaz could hear his internal mechanical systems trying to overcome and suppress his flaring emotions.
"Feeling is weakness. I am beyond it." His voice glitched, caught between emotions and programming.
Yaz was as unconvinced of Ashad's stoicism, as he had been of her bravery.
"So why are you hesitating? I think you’re consumed by feelings. Pretending you’re fine but overwhelmed by your emotions. Hiding them beneath that metal shell. But you can’t hide from yourself.”
An expression crossed his face which Yaz immediately recognised. She took a deep breath. This is where she had skills the Doctor didn’t. She could open herself up, offer genuine vulnerability to find connection.
"I’ve been where you are, Ashad. I know what it’s like to feel like you’re losing yourself. To feel like you don’t belong. To be stuck between two worlds. To be told that you’re not enough. That you need to be more."
Ashad’s human eye flashed with rage. The knife snapped up to her throat. The cold metal bit into her skin, just enough to draw a thin trickle of blood. The Doctor let out a strangled, desperate sound. Yaz heard her, but she couldn’t look away. She had to hold Ashad’s gaze. Had to keep control.
"You presume to understand me?" Even under the veil of the voice modulator, Ashad’s fury was palpable.
Yaz’s throat burned. The sharp sting of the cut, the cold press of the blade. But she didn’t flinch.
"I do. Because I know what it’s like to want to turn it all off. To not feel. To just give in. I understand the impulse. I almost gave into it too."
Ashad’s entire body jerked. A violent, involuntary movement as if something inside him was ripping apart. The knife wavered. His grip loosened. He pulled back. Just slightly. The blade lifted from Yaz’s throat, but the danger wasn’t over. The Doctor exhaled sharply, the human could hear her struggling to push herself up. Yaz knew she had seconds.
“You are not resistance? I will destroy any resistance to the rise of the Cyber Empire.” Ashad regarded Yaz suspiciously.
Yaz’s stomach twisted. She had him. Just for a moment, but she had him. She needed something more. Something to get him to leave willingly. She remembered what the Doctor had said about post-conversion psychosis. The Cyberium had given Ashad purpose, but his mind was scrambled. Maybe she could take advantage.
“No. I’m not resistance. But they are coming. You need to leave—to protect yourself. To advance the Cyber Empire."
Yaz was nauseated at her own words. She felt stained by them. Ashad stiffened. He tilted his head, processing. He dropped the knife. Yaz’s shoulders sagged in relief, her plan was working. Her success was short-lived. Ashad’s metal arm snapped out and seized her by the throat. The air vanished from her lungs as her feet lifted off the ground. Yaz watched as the Doctor thrashed weakly, a panicked, strangled sound escaping her lips as she tried and failed to push herself up.
“You called them here.”
Yaz clawed at his iron grip, gasping.
“I didn’t! I’m with you, remember?”
Ashad’s grip loosened. Just slightly. His head twitched violently, like his mind was short-circuiting. Ashad relaxed his hand and stumbled backwards. Yaz dropped to her knees, gratefully sucking in gulps of air.
“Then who?”
The pain in his voice was real. It cut through the distortion of half conversion. Raw, wounded and genuinely human. Then his expression hardened. His head snapped toward the Doctor. His wrist blaster powered up. Yaz scrambled in front of it.
"No, it wasn’t her! She’s not human - she’s got no skin in this.”
Yaz hesitated. She had an idea. An awful, risky, dreadful one. Unforgivable maybe. One that would doubtless haunt her dreams for the rest of her life. She stole a glance at the Doctor, plaid and smeared with blood. They locked eyes. Yaz had to do this. She had to end this. Lives depended on it.
“It was your family. They’re leading the resistance"
Ashad went rigid. His breath stuttered, erratic. His human hand flew to his head, like the words had physically hurt him. He staggered back and began mumbling to himself as he struggled to process the perceived betrayal.
"They must be erased."
"They already are." Yaz said quietly.
Ashad went rigid, before lunging at Yaz, his visible face contorting with rage.
"LIES!"
Yaz didn’t flinch. She felt the tables turn. She had the upper hand now.
"I saw it. I saw what you did. The blood. You slashed their throats - in the main hallway. I saw it. You already killed them, Ashad. Remember? There’s nothing left for you here."
Ashad’s breath became erratic. He paced as if trying to process the information. Yaz glanced over at the Doctor, who gave her a small nod.
"I… I must ensure… the glory of the Cybermen… before they come for me…"
"That’s right. UNIT. The police. They’ll be here any second. If you stay, they’ll stop you. But if you go now, if you escape, you can still fulfill your purpose."
"The Cybermen will rise… I… will… ascend…"
Ashad gave the panic room door a glance. A final, flickering hesitation and then, suddenly he turned and bolted into the darkness. His heavy, metallic footfalls echoed through the corridors as he disappeared into the night.
Yaz let out a shaky exhale, forcing herself to breathe. The room was too quiet now, the absence of Ashad left a gaping hole in the space. Her hands trembled, adrenaline still coursing through her. Her eyes remained locked on where Ashad had stood moments before. The room closed in around her. This didn’t feel like a victory. In fact, Yaz felt utterly defeated. She had let him go. She had put him on the path to kill billions. No matter what the Doctor said, no matter what time demanded, all those deaths lay at her door.
Her gaze snapped away from the empty corridor, the wet rattle of the Doctor’s ragged breathing catching her attention. The Time Lord coughed weakly from the floor, eyes barely open, struggling against the coma pulling at her.
"You… did it." The Doctor’s words came in a stuttering gasp.
Yaz dropped to her knees beside her, checking for injuries. Blood had pooled beneath the Doctor, seeping into the floorboards beneath her. She was too pale. Too still. The Doctor’s hand twitched, reaching weakly for her.
"Need… healing coma." The Time Lord’s voice was pained.
Yaz swallowed against the tightness in her throat. Carefully, she cradled the Doctor’s face, brushing damp strands of sweaty hair from her forehead.
"I’ll see you when you wake up."
Yaz placed a gentle kiss on the Doctor’s forehead. The alien smiled at the gesture. Her eyes flickered. The Doctor’s breath slowed and her body relaxed as unconsciousness took her.
Yaz held still, waiting until she was certain the coma had taken hold. Only then did she let her fingers linger against the Doctor’s cheek, just for a moment, before forcing herself to move.
The distant howl of sirens cut through the night. UNIT. Emergency services. Help was coming. Part of Yaz felt it was too little, too late. Another part of her knew that if they had arrived earlier, it could have been worse. Ashad was unstable enough. Too many variables, too many risks. But none of that mattered now. She had one last thing to do. Yaz turned to the panic room door. A thick, reinforced steel hatch, untouched by Ashad’s rampage.
She stepped forward, pulling her own sonic from her pocket. It felt too heavy in her hand. Like she had lost the right to be holding it. But she had no choice. She exhaled slowly, closing her eyes, remembering what the Doctor had taught her.
The sonic flashed red. The lock buzzed. The mechanism groaned in protest before, finally, the door inched open. Yaz stepped forward. Her training took over.
"Don’t worry. He’s gone. I’m Yasmin Khan, from UNIT. Everything’s going to be okay."
The hatch fully opened. Inside was a mother and three children. Alive. The mother was on the ground, half-conscious, clutching her side. Her children - a boy and two girls, no older than twelve - were huddled beside her, wide-eyed, frozen in fear. Yaz’s chest tightened. They had been so quiet. So still. Not crying, not screaming, just waiting. Waiting to see if they would live. If the next thing through that door would be salvation or death.
Yaz dropped to her knees beside the mother, already reaching for her wound. Her hands moved on autopilot, the way she had trained for. The way she had done countless times before.
"You’re okay Mrs Adams. You’re okay. Just keep still. I’m going to stop the bleeding." Yaz’s voice was soft but distant.
“Melissa… Teller. I tried to stop him.”
Yaz nodded. She wasn’t surprised Melissa had reverted to her maiden name. Melissa shuddered beneath Yaz’s touch. Her voice was weak, hoarse. Yaz turned to the children.
“Can you pass me the med kit?” Yaz pointed to a green bag on the wall.
The eldest of the children, a mousy haired girl, scrambled over and grabbed the bag before throwing it to Yaz
"Thank you."
Yaz wrapped up Melissa’s wound tied off the bandage. Tight. Professional. But her hands were shaking again. She turned to Melissa.
"Did he say anything to you?"
Melissa’s lips trembled. A tear slipped down her ashen cheek.
"That our deaths would bring him glory… would seal his perfection."
The words hit hard. Yaz swallowed against the weight of them, forcing her voice to remain steady.
"You’re safe now." Yaz cringed at how robotic, how empty her words sounded.
The first of the UNIT officers entered the panic room. Yaz barely registered them. A medical team rushed forward, taking Melissa from her grip, leading the children into the hallway. Someone asked her something. She barely heard it. Someone tapped her on the shoulder.
"Ma’am. There’s a TARDIS outside."
Yaz snapped back to reality. A flicker of confusion, then realization. A TARDIS. Considering another Doctor hadn’t blustered their way in, Yaz deduced it must be the memory TARDIS.
She turned, looking at the Doctor’s motionless form on the floor, crowded by medical workers. Given the Doctor’s panic attack at the lab, Yaz couldn’t let her be poked and prodded by anyone else. Even if the Time Lord was currently in a coma.
“Don’t touch her!” Yaz screamed.
She didn’t think. Didn’t stop. She scrambled to the Doctor, scooping her up.
"Do you need-" A UNIT officer rushed to help her.
"I’ve got her."
Yaz moved like a ghost through the wreckage. The moment she stepped beyond the mansion’s ruined threshold, the cold night air hit her, but it wasn’t enough to ground her. Nothing was. Her feet pounded against the gravel, each step took more effort than the one before. Her body and mind were on the cusp of giving up. She kept moving, not because she wanted to, but because stopping wasn’t an option. Not yet. Not until this was over.
UNIT officers crowded the front drive, moving with purpose and urgency. Imposing order after a period of pure chaos. They turned as she passed, some speaking, some reaching out, offering help, asking questions. But their words were muffled, distant.
She didn’t stop. Didn’t look at them. Didn’t register their faces, their concern, the way they stepped aside for her. It felt like the walls of the world were closing in, like she would be crushed under the weight of it all if she so much as hesitated. If she stopped moving, even for a second, she would collapse. The Doctor’s weight in her arms was the only thing keeping her anchored. The only thing giving her direction. Yaz focused on that. Only that.
Get the Doctor to safety. Get her to the TARDIS. That was the task. That was what mattered. Not the ache in her chest. Not the panic crawling under her skin. Not the memory of Ashad’s voice, of his hand tightening around her throat, or her risking the family with a baseless lie.
A UNIT officer stepped into her path.
"Ma’am, let us-"
Yaz shook her head immediately. A sharp, automatic, violent refusal. Her voice came out too harsh, too cold. A thin layer of steel covering something breaking apart.
"I’ve got her."
The officer hesitated, eyes flickering between her and the Doctor’s unconscious, bloodied form. Yaz could feel their doubt. She could feel their pity. Her stomach twisted, repulsed at the pity directed towards her. Didn’t this officer understand what had happened here? The awful ramifications? What she had done? Yaz pushed forward. Didn’t stop. Didn’t let herself. No one tried to help again. Maybe they’d figured out what she had done. That she was beyond redemption. The Memory TARDIS was waiting. Just a few steps more. Then she could fall apart.
The TARDIS doors opened for her. Yaz barely made it through the console room before the ship took over. The hum changed. The lighting dimmed. The TARDIS knew. Yaz didn’t even have to ask. The doors to the Zero Room slid open. A space untouched by the weight of the universe. She carried the Doctor inside, laying her down carefully. The moment Yaz stepped back, out of the room, the healing process began. The Doctor would recover. She would be fine. She always came back. Eventually.
Yaz didn’t move. She just stood there. Staring at the now closed door to the Zero Room. Her hands started shaking again. Her knees buckled and she sank to the floor. For the first time since Ashad left, she let herself break.
She had let him go. Billions were going to die and she had allowed it to happen. She knew it was for the greater good. Sacrificing her people to ensure the very sanctity of the universe. She had saved the family and the Doctor. But it wasn’t enough. Her ledger was so steeped in blood her conscience could never recover.
She buried her face in her hands. And for the first time in a long, long time she sobbed.