The living room was Regulus' favourite place. He lies on the sofa with his tea and the yellow light pointing in his direction. It was, overall, peaceful — if you ignore Paramore blasting on Barty's room and Evan's shouting with his videogame.
Thankfully, Barty has spent more time hanging on the local library, studying, than dancing around his room and infesting the house with cigarette and weed scent. With that, Regulus had more time to silently read his books and write his stories without headphones pressing against his ears.
Evan was out a lot as well. Sometimes, Regulus wondered if the whole studying story was just a lie for them to hang out away from him, because Barty and Evan were totallydating. Regulus started seeing it a few months ago, shortly after all three moved in together.
They were close, Barty and Evan. As kids, Regulus used to envy them a lot — felt like an intruder, even. With the years, that faded away and he convinced himself it was just overthinking; that Barty and Evan actually liked him and that being his friend wasn't just a charity case for the lonely wolf boy he was.
He had gotten himself used to the way Barty would hold Evan's shoulders, or lay his chin on top of his head, taking advantage of his height. He started to not care when they were seen entering school together every morning, because they had been friends since birth anyway.
However, it was hard to believe everything was platonic after they came out — practically at the same time — and rented a flat to share with Regulus; because, now, Regulus could see everything from a closer sight.
They would make breakfast together, and Evan would rest his legs on top of Barty's lap when watching a film. Barty would massage his shoulders and whisper things in his ear to make Evan chuckle and release whatever tension he had been building up for the day. Regulus could see the way they would hang out in Evan's room until late at night, and caught Barty smiling to get himself to sleep after it. Regulus hated it.
He hated it because he couldn't help but feel left out He hated it because he felt like Barty and Evan didn't trust him enough to be clear and open about their relationship; and he absolutely despised it because he was in love with Barty.
It was hard to admit it the first years, back at High-School when he only saw him for eight hours a week. Regulus would convince himself he was just going crazy, that there was no universe where Barty Crouch Jr could be the reason for his midnight giggles and morning smiles after an extremely, sickening sweet dream. He was everything Regulus was not attracted to: the pettiness, the mockery, the flirtatious way of being… his clothes that just screamed ‘ Please give me attention’ and the ego that just had to be stroked all the time. He was too much . Too loud, too eccentric, too selfish, too arrogant. Everywhere he went, it's like a spotlight would follow, lightning his path and making heads turn around to watch the way his hips moved.
But then, school ended, and Regulus was introduced to another side of Barty. The side that proved that he was not, at all, selfish — the side that showed a boy actually concerned for his future, focused on his studies, putting effort into his life. He started seeing the way Barty would always make extra food in case Regulus was starving after classes. He started seeing the way Barty would ask if Regulus needed help with his work, although he was already stressed enough with his.
Barty is caring, appreciative, determined, empathetic… and even if cocky and reckless, Regulus loves it. He loves how he is too much, in the most outrageous and amusing way.
Realising his feelings at the same time he realised his relationship with Evan was, not slightly, comforting. It tears him apart every time he notices the touches, the way they talk to each other with looks or know exactly each other's favourite things when shopping. Regulus tries to be happy for them, tries to smile wildly whenever they ramble about each other, telling a story of when Regulus wasn't present — but it's way too much. He loves Evan, wants to hug him and express his tenderness and gratitude for him; still, he wants to punish the world for making Evan be in his place.
He sighs, noticing his mind had gone way too far from the words written on the paper. He closes his book, replacing it in his hands with the half-cold tea. Regulus sips slowly on it, delighting the taste and sensation of his throat being hydrated as his naked feet press firmly against the sofa. Before he could get up, the front door was open and Evan stumbled inside, pressing his weight on the wood to lock it. The boy scoffs, and turns around — his eyes lightening up as he recognises Regulus.
Great , he thinks, drunk Evan.
“Hello, you're home late.”
“Yeah,” Evan breathes. “I was— out .”
Regulus presses his tongue against his teeth, restraining a laugh.
Evan had left the house a few hours before Regulus finished classes. He sent a message, letting him know that he was going out with Dorcas and had left the keys under the rug because he would be home shortly after dinner. It was now past ten o'clock.
Not that he hates being home alone — because Barty was visiting his mother back in Italy —, but Regulus can't help but feel the loneliness wrapping around his neck, letting the thoughts rotting his mind as he tirelessly searches for anything to take him out of reality.
“Did you have fun?” he asks, even if the grin on Evan's face says it all.
“ Oh , yeah. Yeah, I did.”
Evan slides his blue scarf off his neck, hanging it before concentrating on his way to the sofa, letting his body sink right after Regulus withdraws his legs.
“Think you had way too much alcohol, mate. Should I give you water or something?”
He hears Evan giggling, closing his eyes to give space to a silent move of chest, smiling so hard his face could be ripped apart by it. Regulus frowns, wondering what's so funny about water.
“Do you want water?” he tries again, waiting for Evan to laugh even harder at the word, but it doesn't happen. Instead, the boy lets his head fall to the side, blinking slowly at his friend.
“Can you see this?” he points to his neck.
Regulus has to squint in order to see the red marks under the dim light, and weight falls over his shoulders. He presses his eyebrows together, shifting his eyes to Evan's bright grin and shiny eyes.
Confusion lingers as he watches the boy chuckling, slowly calming down to shift his body into a more comfortable position.
It can't be , he thinks. Barty had been out of London for over three days, and was only planning on coming back next week. Evan couldn't possibly be making out with him tonight, unless Evan had just returned from Italy or was keeping Barty's return a secret.
There was only one answer: Evan had cheated on Barty, and found it extremely hilarious.
“Are you serious?” he whispers.
“Yeah, mate,” he nods, “think we're boyfriends now, y'know?”
“What the fuck do you mean by that?”
Evan opens his eyes, and raises his eyebrows as if he had just slipped his most horrific secret. His body was pulled up, and he moved until he was facing Regulus.
“Shit… I didn't tell you, did I?” He sighs. “Sorry, mate. We were trying to keep it quiet, only two people knew— I intended on telling you, but… well— yeah. Now you know.”
“I don't understand,” he sucks his upper lip, biting onto it, “i know you guys were dating, but—”
“You knew?”
“Yeah.” He shakes his head. “Don't run from the subject. Why are you telling me this now? You just showed me that,” he points to his neck, and Evan looks down for a second, searching for the mark he couldn't see, “like you're proud of it. Barty's not even here, so don't try to—”
“Barty?” he exclaims. “What does Barty have to do with this?”
It was now time for Regulus to get confused. He narrowed his eyes, swallowing before tilting his head, staring right onto Evan's face. He was waiting for any hints of humour, like he'd start laughing again. It didn't happen. Evan kept staring at him as if Regulus had just spoken in a totally different language.
“Barty…” He maintains. “You're coming home to show me how you've just made out with some bloke while admitting you're dating Barty, finally.”
There was silent cutting onto him for a few seconds before Evan bursted out laughing.
“What?! Dating Barty?!— have you listened to me, Reggie? I just got a boyfriend…”
“What?”
“You're not serious— no. Oh God,” his hands fly to his mouth, “you thought I was dating Barty ?!”
“Well, clearly… wait… you're not dating Barty?”
“Wha… why would you think I was dating Barty?”
“Because— well, fuck.” He bounces into place. “Now I'm confused.”
“You're confused? I'm fucking confused, mate.”
“Then who are you dating?”
“James,” he shrugs, eyebrows still pressed together as if he didn't understand how Regulus could ever think otherwise.
“James?!” he gasps.
Evan lets his eyes close, and takes a deep breath. Regulus knows he definitely isn't in the right mind to explain things right now, so he started gulping on his tea, looking at his friend.
James Potter. Evan was dating James Potter , Sirius’ best friend, James Potter. He wasn't dating Barty, he never was.
Hope hit his chest. He thinks about the moments he shared with Barty, tries to read in-between the lines in the will to catch anything that could hint him that he has a chance with him, because Barty wasn't dating Evan.
But then, Evan speaks, “Barty's got his eyes on someone, anyway–” his eyes fly open, and he stares at Regulus. An horrific expression on his face, “Not that I'd date him if he didn't! Lord, no. Barty's my older brother, I'd never think of him like that. It's just that— well,” he swallows, and Regulus bites the inside of his cheek, “it doesn't matter.”
“Barty likes someone?” Evan looked away, and nodded. “Who?”
“No. No, sorry, Reg. Fuck . I shouldn't have said anything. I'm sorry.”
Oh.
Good, so Barty is keeping secrets after all.
“Do you know?”
“I need water.” He jumps out of the sofa, losing balance almost immediately. Regulus leans over to place one hand on his hip, and Evan shakes his head. “‘m fine.”
“Fine?!”
“Yeah.” He looks over his shoulder, smiling in reassurance. “Just need water.”
Regulus watches as he lumbers towards the kitchen. He lets his worried expression drop to a slight pressure of eyebrows, not knowing exactly if he should feel relieved about his best friends not dating or extremely frustrated, because they were still keeping a secret from him.
⭑ ⭑ ⭑
For the rest of the week, Regulus tries to get something out of Evan, but the boy doesn't seem to quite remember how he had exposed Barty that night, so, Regulus has to try finding out by himself. He texts Dorcas and Pandora, but all replies are the same: babes istg i have no idea who barty is shagging. ask him yourself maybe?
Thing is, Regulus couldn't ask Barty, because he doesn't have the guts to explain his massive interest in it. Of course, he could try and say that he just hates how his best friend is restraining him from knowing about his life, but pressuring him would seem way too suspicious. Instead, he starts stalking his social media, trying to find anything alarming. It doesn't work, because Barty would flirt with a fly if it lands too close to him.
Eventually, Barty comes back. He hears him talking about his week and showing pictures of the places he visited with his mother. Some of them were of parks, his mum playing with a stray dog, selfies of himself in front of a river with sunglasses on — although it isn't even summer.
Others were of more fancy places, like museums. Barty spends hours talking about every single piece of art he took a picture of, and Regulus hears quietly, asking questions and showing interest in it, even if, deep down, all he wanted to know was who Barty was seeing .
Two days go by, and Regulus’ throat itches to ask. So, he eventually gathers the courage on a random Monday in the kitchen.
Barty is making a toast, and Regulus is washing the dishes. Silent is comfortable around them, but Regulus has to break it somehow.
He looks at him, seeing the boy on his phone while the toasts are being made. His hair is slightly shorter than it was when he left for Italy, and his skin a little more tanned due to the hours spent under the sun. Regulus thinks he's more beautiful than he has ever been, with the fresh butterfly tattoo on the shoulder he left for display with his old white T-shirt that fell to the side, showing his neck and collarbone, stopping right before his forearm. Regulus also thinks that the T-shirt must be uncomfortable.
He opens his mouth, and closes it before a sound finally comes out, “You won't guess what happened.”
Barty lifts his head immediately, turning his phone off.
“What?” he asks, checking his toast.
Regulus laughs through his nose, remembering how drunk Evan was, “A week ago, Evan came home totally pissed,” he gulps. Keep it cool, Regulus, “And he showed me a hickey he had.”
“And?” Barty frowns, seeking for the joke.
“Thing is, before he told me about James… I— I thought he had cheated on you , and he had to tell me you guys weren't dating.”
He giggles, closing the water as he finishes cleaning the last plate. When he looks at Barty, he expects the same reaction as Evan. ‘Evan?! You thought I was dating Evan?!’
Nothing. All he gets is an unreadable look. Barty presses his eyebrows together, tilting his head while inhaling deeply. Regulus slowly stops his laugh, afraid he had not understood anything.
“You thought…”
“Yeah,” he smiles softly. Please laugh, please don't make this awkward.
“Oh.”
“Yeah…”
“What made you think me and Evan were dating?” he approaches him, licking his lips. Regulus has to remember to look up.
“Dunno— uhm . Well, I just… you are always together, so…” he waves his hand dismissively. “It was funny, actually.”
“All this time? Like, you thought me and Evan were a couple since when?”
“When we moved in…?” he shrugs, “It doesn't matter. He already explained everything to me.”
He didn't. Actually, Evan left things way too confusing in Regulus’s head, but still, he hopes that if he lies, Barty will finally spill the truth and let him in.
A flash of concern goes through Barty's face as he straightens his back, sticking his tongue out once again to moisturise his lips before running his fingers through his brown hair.
“ Fuck .” He looks at Regulus, whose smile has just disappeared. “I'm sorry, Art. Really, I didn't want you to find out like that— I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, I hope that doesn't make things weird between u—”
Regulus is quick to stop him, raising his hand up to his chest, tilting his head while pressing all his face muscles together.
“ Christ, ” he lets out a dead laugh, “Who are you shagging? My committed brother?! Relax, Barty,” he smiles at his confused expression, although his stomach was flipping around, threatening to expel his lunch, “he didn't tell me who your crush is. You clearly don't want me to know, and that's fine… I just think it's terrible that you're keeping things for me. It's okay. It's your personal life anyway–”
“What?”
“ What?!”
“He didn't tell you?”
“No!”
“Oh,” he barks out a relieved laugh, and Regulus has to bite his lip, “Oh fuck. Uhm— well.”
Silence extends for long, painful, seconds, until Regulus is speaking again, lower this time, “How long have you known them?”
Barty blinks at him, turns around and takes off his toast, giving his full focus to the butter and the knife.
“Years,” he simply replies.
Regulus swallows strongly. Years. That could mean a lot of things — High-School, Middle School, his childhood… maybe even his first year in College.
However, if it was someone Barty knew for years , then Regulus has to know them. That doesn't make anything better, because now everyone is a threat.
Regulus didn't allow himself to feel jealous of Evan, because that was his best friend, the one person who supported him through everything, and Regulus had no right to be mad at him. But, if it was someone else , then it was different. Regulus doesn't have any emotional connection stopping him from wanting to explode their heads as soon as they step close to Barty; and that was just… worse.
Barty wasn't the guy to have a new person on his bed every Friday night, but he is the bloke to flirt, hug and whisper sweet nothings on people's ears. So, it could be, really, anyone , and knowing that Regulus probably already knew that person, made his options far too short.
Evan is out. Dorcas is out. Pandora is out. Sirius even more out. James was never an option and their old friend, Severus, is just too much of a crazy idea.
“Do I know them?” he decides to ask, and Barty stops his motion for a while before throwing the knife on the sink, and sticking his toast to his mouth.
Regulus follows his hand, and stops his eyes at the knife. You're joking.
“Wash that for me?” he asks with a stuffed mouth, and leaves the kitchen.
Fuck him , he thinks, and takes a deep breath.
⭑ ⭑ ⭑
“I don't get it.” He mumbles to Dorcas as she closes her laptop in a sight. “Why is he hiding it from me?”
“I don't know, you know how Barty is.”
“I'm his best friend, Cas! If Evan knows, why don't I? What did I do to make him not trust me?”
The girl takes a deep breath, picking on the edge of her round sticker on the laptop.
“I mean, you also don't trust them enough to come out to them…”
He rolls his eyes, “It's different. I don't come out to them because I don't feel ready. Especially with this whole liking Barty thing! When they came out, they spent hours discussing who their gay awakening was! They'll do the same to me and I won't be able to explain how my gay awakening was Barty !”
“They were what? 16? Besides, you can always lie.”
“I don't like lying to them,” he states, “guess it's not mutual.”
Dorcas looks at him with those eyes Regulus hates so much. Pity .
“Maybe try to convince him, Reggie. You know Barty doesn't resist you.”
“He resisted me in the kitchen when I asked if I knew that person… do you think he's seeing Sirius?”
Dorcas moves her head back, lips raising in disgust as she frowns, “ Sirius? Sirius is dating.”
“Yeah! Maybe he's having an affair with him and that's why he doesn't want to tell me.”
He follows Dorcas when she gets up, “You're crazy.”
“Cas! I'm serious. It has to be that!”
“Reg–”
“Ask him!”
She finally turns around, one hand on the bathroom handle.
“No.”
“ Please. ”
“Regulus, you're obsessed with it. It's not healthy and you'll just end up more upset after he tells you who it is.” Regulus swallows, blinking at her. “You can't force people into trusting you or just… sharing personal information. Best friend or not.”
When Dorcas closes the door, Regulus is left outside with his own frustration. She's right , he thinks. He was just seeking his own heartbreak. At this point, it doesn't matter who Barty is seeing, because it isn't him.
Yeah , he thinks, Fuck this.
⭑ ⭑ ⭑
Regulus keeps his mind for around 4 days. Every time his brain would tell him to ask who Barty is texting, or just start a long conversation about friendship and trust, he would shut himself down, drowning his head on some book to distract his mind.
However, he also caught himself writing stories about a hopeless young boy who has an unrequited crush for his hot best friend. Those are the kind of stories he doesn't let Barty read, even if it's upsetting for him, because Barty reads everything he writes. It's fair , he thinks in order to feel less guilty about it.
Regulus tries to convince himself he is overthinking when he hears shouting coming from Evan's room instead of loud giggles, or when Barty avoids eye contact with Regulus.
Slowly, he starts feeling unwelcome in his own house.
But then, Barty finally sits next to him while writing, not looking at the screen as Regulus closes the tab. Tension flies over them, the feeling of their friendship breaking apart for a silly little crush.
He bites his lip, and looks at Barty, who's already looking at him.
“I'm not homophobic, you know?” he finally says, “If you're into a boy, I really couldn't care less. I've known about your sexuality for years.”
Silence.
“I know.”
“I wish you trusted me more.”
“I know.”
“Stop saying that.”
Barty looks at his own hands, licking his lips before sucking them in, “I trust you.”
“Doesn't look like it… it hurts me, Barty. I mean— at first I thought you and Evan were dating in secret and didn't want anyone to know, but then… then I found out it’s nothing like that, it's worse. Because you've had the chance to tell me who you fancy and you just ran away .”
“You don't understand,” he sighs.
“Then clear it up for me. Why don't you want to tell me? This isn't about who anymore, it's about why.”
Barty finally looks up, his pupils eating all of the brown in his eyes as his lips twitched down. He opens his mouth, and then shakes his head.
“Alright.” He lets out. “No more secrets.”
“Alright,” he nods.
“You go first. I know you keep secrets from me. I never pressured because I am no one to talk but if you want me to open my heart, you'll have to break the ice first.”
Regulus takes a deep breath.
“I don't know…”
“Reg.”
“Barty,” he frowns. There were so many things he could say, like how he despises coffee and hot chocolate; but that wasn't enough. It wasn't what Barty wanted, “I-” He swallows. Only two things came to mind, and both seemed terrible.
“You understand me now, right? Whatever you've been keeping is as meaningful as my feelings… what I feel for that boy is not a teenage crush, Reg. I love him, and I'm afraid it'll make things weird between us.”
“Weird? Why? I don't care, Barty! As long as it's not my brother I couldn't care less.”
“I can't say it.”
He's so close. So close to knowing the truth, to deepen his friendship with Barty and be as close to him as Evan is. But he knows Barty won't say it if Regulus doesn't spill it first.
“I'm gay,” he confesses in a rush, not thinking much into it. The words leave his mouth and his heart races through his throat. He feels his stomach sinking as Barty's face drops.
It's okay , he tells himself. Barty wouldn't judge, Barty couldn't judge.
Still, he doesn't feel safe. His fingers go numb as he presses them against the computer on his lap.
“Oh.”
“I didn't say it earlier because…” you're the one who made me realise it.
“Was it because of me? Did you feel like you couldn't tell me?”
Regulus sighs, “You guys are always keeping secrets from me. James, that boy of yours… how did you expect me to feel ready to open up about my feelings knowing I'd be doing way more than you've ever done?”
Something in Barty's expression changes, and he is taking the computer off Regulus’ lap to hold his hands, turning his body until they are facing each other.
“I'm so sorry, Reggie. Fuck , I wish I could tell you… but trust me, your friendship means everything to me—”
“Stop,” he squeezes his eyes shut, shaking his head softly.
There is a moment of silence before Barty holds his hands strongly.
“Okay.” He says, “I'm going to tell you because I don't want you to feel like we don't trust you…” Regulus opens his eyes. It's now. Barty is going to tell him and he can finally stop obsessing over finding out who it is. Still, he wants to stop him, because now he doesn't want to know , “It's you.”
The world stops.
Regulus holds his breath, staring at Barty's eyes to watch his pupils clenching and his rapid blinking. He waits, and waits, but Barty doesn't laugh.
He doesn't realise he had been quiet for more than 3 seconds, because Barty is pulling away, sighing against his hands.
“I'm sorry.” He murmurs, looking down. Move, Regulus. “I knew you'd react like that, I am so fucking sorry, Regulus. Don't hate me.”
Regulus. It echoes in his head, because Barty never calls him by his actual name unless they're fighting. It's real, he thinks. It is fucking real.
He doesn't control his movements, because, without missing a beat, Regulus is jumping onto Barty, holding his face to force eye contact before crashing their lips together, and, Goddammit.
He had dreamed about this for years , fantasising about how Barty's lips would feel like, and it doesn't compare to the actual thing. He frowns, pressing their lips together for long enough to Barty to push him away.
He blinks.
“Regulus…?”
“I like you.” He breathes out. “I've liked you for years.”
And it comes, Barty laughs. Barty laughs so hard Regulus can't do anything other than slowly pull back, pressing his eyebrows together.
Was he just… pranked? Was Barty playing?
“Stop,” he says, and the smile drops.
“What the fuck?!”
“Stop that, Regulus.” He stands up. “I'm being serious.”
“What the fuck makes you think I am not?! ” he shouts, “You just told me you liked me, why are you doing this?”
“It doesn't make sense. You can’t like me.”
It's Regulus’ turn to chuckle in pure anger, “You're joking.”
“Regulus, you thought me and Evan were dating!”
“And how do you think that made me feel, huh?”
Regulus knows he doesn't have the right to be mad, but his body is burning in confusion, frustration. He had imagined this scene too many times. Sweet kisses and promises, strokes on the cheek and giggles — but no, what he gets is Barty thinking he is a liar. So, he throws a pillow at him, hoping that'd hurt him, but Barty just catches it the second it hits his stomach.
“I've been pining over you! Crying myself to sleep because I thought you were kissing Evan every night. I drowned myself in this sick obsession to find out who you liked, and now you think I'm lying?! Trust me for one time in your life, fuck!”
Barty stares at him so silently Regulus has to stand up. As if that woke him up, Barty finally speaks.
“You like me?”
“Yes!”
“Promise it.”
“What?”
“Promise it. You have to promise it, because I am being 100% serious right now, and if you're kidding I swear to God I will move out tonight.”
Regulus almost laughs, because this feels like a dream. He starts wondering if he had fallen asleep while writing, and tries testing his voice.
“I don't know what you want me to say in order for you to believe me.”
“Promise it.”
“I promise it,” he lets out, “on your life. I promise I have been insanely in love with you since the last school year. I promise you're the only person I have ever liked, the only person who makes me feel as crazy as you do. I promise it .”
He doesn't have time to wait for an answer, because Barty is holding his neck, pulling him into a desperate kiss. There isn't time for their lips to touch before his tongue is asking for permission to be welcomed inside Regulus’ mouth. His hands fly to Barty's shirt, and he grabs onto it like his life is going to fade away. Barty kisses him as if the world was ending, and Regulus can't help but search for more of it.
“I'm dreaming.” He hears between kisses. “This isn't real.”
“You like me,” he whispers as reality hits him.
Barty liked him. He was the person Barty is in love with. When he ran away, when he panicked and apologised when he thought Evan had told Regulus who it was.
He feels stupid, oblivious. The truth was dancing in front of his eyes and he had let anxiety get the best of it. He thought Barty didn't trust him anymore, that he didn't want his friendship.
Part of it is true, because now Regulus knows Barty wants more, that he wants what Regulus wants.
His back hits the sofa, and he's pulling back. He blinks, looking around as he tries to remember when they had moved. But then, Barty is kissing his neck, and Regulus is gasping, closing his eyes.
Heaven. This is Heaven in its most pure form.
He grabs Barty's hair, in an attempt to look for his mouth, but then, the door is heard.
Barty jumps, and Regulus is pulling his body up, cleaning his mouth with the back of his hand while Barty sits next to him, fixing his shirt.
When Regulus turns his head to the side, Evan is standing there, keys on his hand.
“ Uhm— I'm so sorry. I'll just,” he points to the corridor, and presses his lips onto a thin line, “Yeah. Sorry!” he raises his hand, and drops his head to the ground as if he had just caught them naked.
Regulus would laugh if he wasn't so concerned. Oh, fuck. Coming out to Barty was already unplanned enough — having Evan find out this way was just the worst thing.
He looks at Barty, who has his fingers pressed against his mouth as he blinks, and blinks, before barking out a laugh.
Regulus frowns, “This isn't funny!”
“He knows.”
What.
“What?”
“He knows about me fancying you. That's why— well, that's why we're so close, as you've said. We kinda bonded over liking straight boys.”
No.
That wasn't it.
“You're fucking kidding me. All this time you were talking about me?” he finally laughs, because, once again, it doesn't feel real.
All the times he has seen Barty leaving Evan's room at 3 in the morning, smiling. All the giggling he heard; it wasn't because they were dating, it was because of him .
“Yes,” Barty says, “that's why we were keeping things from you, because, well, we couldn't explain why I would be so invested in Evan and James.”
“You're stupid. You could've just told me.”
“I thought you were straight,” he remarks, and, okay, that makes sense.
“I'm not.”
“That's clear now,” Barty whispers in a grin, and Regulus has to kiss him again.
The boy hums against his lips, letting his hands fall to his waist as he moves closer.
“Are there any more secrets you want to tell me?” Regulus wonders.
Barty licks his lips, looking to the ceiling as he frowns. Regulus rolls his eyes at the exaggeration.
“I ate your dragon fruit,” he finally looks down, and Regulus’ mouth drops wide as Barty chuckles.
“What?!”
“I'm sorry! I was hungry.”
“It had a sticker so you'd know it wasn't for anyone to touch!” he hits his arm, and Barty slides his hand to his neck, stealing a kiss from him.
“Let me make up for it,” his voice drops, and Regulus can't help but let into his racing heartbeat, nodding in a soft smile. Stole dragon fruit totally forgotten.
Barty's kissing him again, slowly. Time isn't scary, because they know they have forever in their hands. He lets the questions in his mind be stuffed in a little box, saving them for when Barty isn't hypnotising him with his tongue.
He feels Barty's soft hair on his hands, and moves it to get more of it. His mind focused on the sensation of his tongue, causing his throat to close in a suppressed noise.
However, something stops him. A memory.
‘ What I feel for that boy is not a teenage crush, Reg. I love him’
“Wait.”
“Is everything okay?”
“What you said earlier…”
“I say a lot of things, Art.” He laughs through his nose. “You'll have to be more specific.”
“You love me,” he meant it as a question, but it came out as a statement. Regulus would worry about it if Barty wasn't smiling.
“Yes.”
“Okay,” he nods, “I love you too,” there is a pause where he looks at Barty's eyes, catching insecurity, so he adds, “Promise it.”
“I've loved you for so long. Maybe even before I knew what love meant… I only see you, Art. No one, nothing compares.”
“I can't believe this is real.”
“Me neither,” he bumps their noses together.
Regulus opens his mouth to reply, but then, Evan is hitting the furniture, cursing under his breath before looking at his friends.
“My bad,” he says, “pretend you didn't see me.”
He disappears into the kitchen, and Barty is dropping his head to Regulus’ shoulder, chuckling. Regulus lets himself laugh along, stroking Barty's hair.
It feels light, and Regulus doesn't believe hours ago he was creeping in anxiety, but that's how it is with them. Every fight they had was over something that could be solved with a quick talk — Regulus then thinks they have to start working on their communication.
He lets all the deep talks for the next day. He hugs Barty's torso as he falls asleep with his chest moving slowly under his head, and his thumb stroking his arm. He lets himself drown in peace as he comes to the conclusion he won't be ever using his own bed again, because sleeping on Barty's arms is everything he has ever wanted.
⭑ ⭑ ⭑