Agatha never really did the whole “love” or “relationship” thing, some may say its due to her crippling mother issues or the fact she never was shown a good example of a healthy relationship growing up considering her maniac of a mother drove her father away before she could even form any memories of him. No, it was simply because she never felt the need for one, what was the point of letting someone in and them seeing your true self all your flaws and vulnerabilities if Agatha couldn’t love herself how was some random stranger supposed to? Why put yourself out there when your heart could easily be ripped out and stomped on, surely that could be considered a form of self-harm? Putting yourself your heart your emotions in danger on the whim of “finding the one?”
It's not that Agatha hated herself, it's just she never felt good enough, always stuck feeling like a disappointment just as her mother told her she was over and over again in her childhood. She tried not to let her mother’s words affect her I mean she’s a grown-ass woman for god's sake whose have been free from the claws of her own personal demon for over two decades now, but when you’re repeatedly told you’re something no matter what you do it'll affect you, even if Agatha doesn’t like to acknowledge it. She ignored the constant nightmares, the memories that kept her up at night tossing and turning in her sheets trying to block out the constant voices that were putting her down.
So if you were to tell her past self that she was in love with an incredible (yet annoyingly charming ) younger woman who even though she hasn’t said it yet loved her just as much back, she probably would’ve laughed in her face. But it was true Agatha was head over heels in love with Rio Vidal, the type of love you hear in cheesy songs or stupid and predictable rom-coms. Agatha loved everything about her, she loved her charming yet goofy smile, she loved her obsession for plants, she loved when she got annoyed and would break out into Spanish without even realizing it, hell she even loved all the random stupid facts she’d blurt out at the most random moments. In fact, it was one of those random moments that made the older woman realize she was in love with Rio yet she’d never admit it (especially since neither had yet to tell the other that they loved them, they both knew it anyone who knew them knew it.)
It was just a normal Tuesday afternoon during lunch period. Agatha was grading one of her class history tests that had just been taken that morning. Whilst she was known as a hardass to her students, she did take her job seriously. She cared about their education as long as they cared about it. However, most kids feared her not even daring to make eye contact with her, Its not her fault their idiots who have the attention span of a goldfish, maybe if she put clip of family guy or some subway game (Billy explained this craze to her, the only student that doesn’t give her a headache… most of the time anyway) on the screen they’d actually be able to absorb the information she’s teaching them.
Normally during lunch period she’d spend it in the teacher's lounge with Rio or theyd hide in one of their cars if the older woman wasn’t particularly feeling like being near others (aka on the verge of murdering Jennifer, the home tec teacher, for simply breathing in the same room as her). But since she was grading papers today Agatha found herself in her classroom sitting at her desk with her partner sitting on the floor next to her (which may be odd to others but its pretty in character for the brunette considering she will sit on the floor on anything including public transport calling it ‘floor culture’ whatever that means, at this point Rio could eat a rock for fun and Agatha wouldn’t be phased in the slightest.)
As they sit in silence, the room engulfed in comfortable quietness aside from the scribbles of a pen marking papers and the sound of a sandwich being chewed by the woman occupying a space on the floor. The silence doesn’t last long interrupted by Rio “Did you know that in 2021, more people were killed by vending machines than sharks?”
Most of Rios random facts at the moment were about sharks since they were her current hyper fixation, she even interrupted a partially intense make-out session the other day just to inform Agatha that shark scientists have potentially found evidence that the megalodon was actually more similar to a mako shark than a great white and then went on a long rant about how it would affect its eating patterns etc.
“why on earth would I know that, why do you even know that?” the history teacher questioned briefly looking up from the papers in front of her.
“I was arguing with Billy who claimed he was scared of sharks and how they were evil or some shit like that, so obviously I had to prove him wrong,” she answered like it totally answered Agathas question (it did not).
“So instead you instilled a fear of vending machines in him, how the hell does one get killed by a vending machine anyway? What a dumb way to die”
“I mean since 1978 37 people have been killed by them and 113 have been injured,” Rio shrugged.
“God if I ever go in such an embarrassing way bring me back to life and kill me again for being an idiot,” Agatha said rolling her eyes and attempting to refocus on the task at hand.
“You know I’d never hurt you,” Rio responded seriously, staring into Agatha's eyes looking like a sad puppy begging for a treat.
“Not even if I was a zombie trying to eat you?”
“you know dam well id let you eat me day or night, I mean you ate me last night.” Rio smoothly responded, causing Agatha to blush at the memories of the previous day.
“Oh you know that is so not what I meant,” Agatha sarcastically said throwing a whiteboard eraser at Rios chest.
“Ouch you wound me, darling,” Rio responded while dramatically grasping her chest.
“oh shut up and get out my classroom, lunch is almost over and you know how long the walk is to the biology block,” she said while trying not to grin like an idiot at her girlfriends theatrics.
“yeah, yeah, I'll see you after school, te veo.” She said while begrudgingly standing up, giving Agatha a peck on the cheek before leaving to head to her own classroom across campus.
It was as she watched Rio(s ass) walk away she just knew she wanted the rest of her life to be like this, to have these silly domestic moments, to be happy for once. When she was with the other woman she felt like she could breathe, like she could just exist. She didn’t feel like a failure or a disappointment, an abomination, a sinner she just felt like herself. She felt whole. She felt loved and in love.