Nettle - Cruelty
His family wasn’t cruel. They were just protective of their image. To the Black family, nothing is more important than their image. After all that’s what their entire family and fortune is made of.
An image. A facade. Sure, Sirius' mother isn’t the most gentle person, and his dad barely talks to him. But that doesn’t mean they’re cruel. Does it?
Mom only used the Cruciatus Curse if they really misbehaved. Mrs Potter probably did that too. James being her son and all. Right? Besides, it’s only him that keeps acting out. According to his mother and father anyway. As the oldest son and heir, he has to act accordingly. But he doesn’t. So he gets punished. Again and again.
At least it isn’t Reggie dealing with this enormous amount of pain. He only deals with the screams that escape Sirius’s lips when he can no longer hold them back by gritting his teeth. Sometimes he can, but other times, his screams echo through the entire manor.
The times Regulus can hear the screams are the worst days. Those days remind both younger and older brother that they are not in any position of power in their own lives. They were there as the heir, and as the spare. They are there to listen, obey and not talk back. It doesn’t matter whether they are in the manor or at Hogwarts, they must and they will behave to the Black family standard. Or their parents will find out, and they will deal with the consequences as soon as they get home.
Sirius always hopes for luck. McGonnagall doesn’t send as many letters home as she claims, and he knows that. But he also knows that enough get sent to keep him hostage in his room for the entirety of summer.
Marlene and Lily sometimes ask typical ice breakers. What’s your favourite colour? What’s a flower you like? And that would make Sirius think. What is his mother’s favourite colour? Black maybe? Because of their name? What about a flower? His mom didn’t seem like a flower person. Maybe a man-eating plant. Or one of those prickly weeds. Like a nettle. Yeah, his mom seems like a person that likes nettles. They’re prickly and unpleasant to touch. Just like his mother. She doesn’t like touch that doesn’t leave an impression, or imprint. Like a hand on his cheek that stings for what feels like hours. That’s probably why the first time James hugged him, Sirius had braced himself. Hugs were new back then. Now, whenever he goes home, he misses them. And he knows Regulus does too.
His parents aren’t cruel. They are just like nettles. You have to be a certain type of person to love them. Though he doesn’t know whether his parents even love each other. They have kids, so that counts for something. But isn't it mostly just because his father needed an heir for the Black family name? So the name could live on for even longer than it already had? What is love? Is love the way James looks at Lily? Or is it the way they all take care of Remus after full moons? Or how they all beat up a bunch of Slytherins that were making fun of Peter? Is love the way Mr and Mrs Potter look at each other, and embrace each other as if it could be that last embrace?
Is it cruel that neither Black brother really knows what love is? Is it cruel that neither of them willingly go home? Is it cruel that Sirius gets tortured simply for what Hogwarts House he’s in? Is his family just cruel, or has he gone soft? No. His family wasn’t cruel. They were just protective of their image. That’s all. They were protective of the Black family image, Sirius told himself. As he would continue for ages. Until he hits his breaking point. Then, and only then, is he able to say that his family is cruel in many ways. In ways the public will never know of, and in ways the public will be shocked by. But they are cruel. As they always were, and always will be.
His family is like nettles. Unnecessarily cruel and painful.