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Hey there guys. Here's my redo. It's still kind of really short, but it's a work in progress. Um, anyways yeah.
This chapter mentions grief a lot and death, so if you don't like that kind of stuff just be cautious.
Enjoy!
Sirius had never had a family that was his. The Blacks were never his family. Never one’s that he wrote about for his family tree’s in school, or someone that he called Mom and Dad. The Potter’s were there, sure, but those were James’. He was just an addition. Never in his life had he been able to possess something as wonderful as family. Something that was branched from him, extension’s of him, people he was able to love and not feel guilty about loving.
And so as he sits on the small blanket Remus had worked days upon days to crochet, feeling the summer breeze blow his dark curls out of his face, feel the sun warming his skin, he looks at his family just a few feet away, and feels his entire heart swell.
Remus crouches down with the red-headed little girl full of mischief and giggles and helps her pick the best flower, tucking one behind her ear as she searches intently, tongue sticking out with concentration as it always did. She giggles when he does that. Puts her ear to her shoulder and squeals, “Moony, that tickles!”
“Oh that tickles? What about this?” Remus scoops her up quickly and begins tickling the one spot on her stomach that always pulls out a belly laugh. She squirms in his arms, head thrown back and face glowing with content. Sirius can feel the glow from his spot, so bright it burns in a way that he’s never quite truly felt.
Remus and Sirius adopted Effie 6 years ago, and they can say it was the best decision they’ve ever made. She was just a baby then, dropped off at a fire station her first day into the world and she wil spend the rest of her days in the Lupin household. It was a decision that was very easy to make. Remus knew they were going to adopt a child. Demanded it actually, something he told Sirius very clearly before they got married 8 years prior. Sirius happily agreed.
They had fostered before her, loving the children as long as they were able to before they could go off and find their own families. Effie was an emergency placement. The moment Sirius laid eyes on her though, he knew she was the one.
She showed up with bright red hair and green eyes, and he knew his daughter was in his arms like he knew the sky was blue. She was meant for him. For both him and Remus. She was perfect.
The process was gruelling, but soon, they had their Effie Jay Lupin, and that was all they needed. They were content. They were happy, something they hadn’t felt in a very long time.
“Pads! Pads!”
Sirius is shaken out of his thoughts as Effie sprints over, Remus close behind as always.
“Look at the flower we found!” She proudly shoves the flower in Sirius’s face.
Sirius’s breath is taken away a bit as he’s able to catch his gaze on it.
“A purple Lilie! Just like Aunt Lily!”
Sirius smiles fondly at his daughter. “It’s beautiful, Effie.”
Effie grins, reassured in the way she always liked to be and puts it gently in her basket full of flowers, running off to go find a new addition.
Effie had been told stories of her Aunt Lily and Uncle James frequently. It had happened accidentally, after the Potter’s names were vowed not to be spoken anymore, but Effie had asked for a bedtime story when she was just a toddler, and a story about pranks and love and friends was spilling out of Sirius’s mouth before he could think.
Lily and James Potter died in a car crash far before Effie was here. They were driving on Halloween night, and a drunk driver hit them in an intersection on their way home. After that, Sirius and Remus were sure all light had left their life. James was Sirius’ soulmate, and Lily was Remus’. How was there a life without their best friends? How would they breathe? How would they have the nerve to continue on living if they couldn’t do it by their sides?
The grief engulfed them. Nearly suffocated them. They spent their days arguing, trying to put the blame on each other because the person who really deserved it wasn’t there to scream at. Venom spilled out of each of their mouths and landed at their feet for the other to clean up, and once they finally did the cycle would repeat. Some days, they just laid in bed, numb to the world and not saying a word. Some days they spent crying so hard the only thing they could do was hold each other and try to keep the pieces together, clinging to the only things they had left.
For years, James and Lily couldn’t be spoken about without an empty silence. Until Effie came. She looked so much like Lily. Acted so much like James. She was a marauder at heart, and she became the bridge back to them. She was able to help Sirius and Remus learn to make the grief they held good, and soon they were telling her all about them.
Pictures of them went back on the walls. Stories of them were whispered in the night. She called them Aunt Lily and Uncle James as soon as they were mentioned, holding them so close to her heart it healed a part of Sirius’s soul that he thought would never be healed again.
James and Lily Potter were back. That was enough for Sirius.
“Hey, sweetheart.” Sirius looks up to see Remus sitting beside him. He wraps an arm around Sirius and immediately he’s melting into Remus’ embrace. “Where are you at right now?”
Sirius sighs. Effie’s running around with a kid she seems to have just met, playing tag in front of them. He keeps his gaze on her as he says, “Just back then.”
Remus kisses the top of his head and rubs his arm up and down. “We should probably get ready to go soon. It’s about to start getting dark, and Mary’s meeting us for dinner.”
Sirius groans. “But I’m so comfy.”
“Oh no. I’m not watching two children this afternoon,” Remus chuckles. “Come on. Let’s go ahead and pack up. Give her five more minutes.”
Sirius sighs and works his way up, folding the blanket and putting it carefully in the basket with the flowers.
Five minutes have passed and Effie is on Sirius’s shoulders as they make their way to the car.
“And then there was this huge monster. And we were running. But Tommy can’t run fast enough so he got eaten. But I had to leave him behind cause you know, every man for himself. And then a magic fairy came, and made the monster spit him out. So Tommy could come back and run with me. And the fairy gave us powers, and I had fire, and he had water, and we beat the monster just like that. It was amazing,” Effie announces. She had been talking about the imaginary game she and her new friend made up since they started walking. Sirius wasn’t sure how she still had breath in her.
“That sounds incredible, honey,” Sirius reassures.
“It was, Pads. You should've been there.”
“Moony and I watched the whole time. You guys did great.”
Effie grins at Sirius while he sets her in his booster seat. “Can we listen to Bow?”
“Of course we can,” Remus says immediately. He’s already started the car and put in the cd of all his favorite David Bowie songs.
Sirius laughs at them as he walks to the passenger seat.
Remus had created Effie’s love for David Bowie since they first got her. The girl was in love. Anything David Bowie, Effie knew about. Remus bragged about it to everyone they knew. It made Sirius’s heart swell.
As they pull up to their driveway, Sirius hears Effie squeal from the backseat.
“MARE!” she screams, unbuckling before the car’s even stopped.
“Effie, no the car’s not parked-” Remus tries to scold but Effie’s already jumped out of the car and is running for Mary, who’s waiting by the front door with open arms.
“Jay-Jay!” Mary says. She picks Effie up and spins around. Effie giggles in her arms.
Sirius fights back a laugh as Remus walks over, hands on his hips and begins to scold Effie for running out of the car before it was in park.
“You could’ve gotten hurt! You can’t do that, Effie. You have to be more careful, alright? You have to act safely.”
“But… Mare’s here,” Effie says as if that excuses it all. For Sirius, it does. Who wouldn’t jump out of a moving car for Mary Macdonald?
Remus however has his nose pinched between his pointer finger and thumb as Sirius makes his way up to them, kissing his shoulder gently and rubbing his arm.
“She’s fine, Moony. She just loves her Mare. Isn’t that right, Jay-Jay?” Mary says.
Effie nods enthusiastically.
“Oh don’t encourage her,” Remus mutters with an eyeroll, walking in with Sirius.
Mary’s heard laughing behind them with Effie now on the ground, dragging Mary to her room to play as soon as they’re in the doorway.
Dinner is made- spaghetti, the easiest dinner they can make because they spent too much time at the park - and soon Effie is covered in spaghetti sauce head to toe and is being put in the bath by Sirius.
“In and out, alright?” Sirius says.
Effie nods from the bathtub, already washing her hair and putting it in some crazy hairdos.
Sirius laughs and walks to the kitchen, leaving the door open in case she needs anything. Mary and Remus have already done the dishes and sit by the window where Remus and Sirius have made their little nook bench just for smoking cigarettes. Mary and Remus pass one back and forth. Sirius settles in the middle of them.
“Hand one over,” Sirius says to Remus, holding his hand out.
Remus smirks and pulls one out, setting it in Sirius’ hand along with the lighter.
As Sirius lights it, Mary says, “She’s growing up to be just like you, Black. Full of energy and doesn’t know where to put it.”
Sirius chuckles a bit as he breathes out. “I know. She’s a pain in the ass.”
“Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,” Remus mutters. Sirius knocks his elbow into his shin as Mary lets out a belly laugh.
“She’s so much like how I imagine Harry would’ve been,” Mary says, taking another drag.
Sirius goes silent at that.
Harry was a hard topic. James and Lily they had healed from, because they were gone and there was nothing they could do. Harry however was less than 10 miles away at the Dursley’s and Sirius was never able to lay his eyes on him.
After the accident, Harry had been put into the custody of the Dursley’s, as they were the closest blood relatives he had. Sirius fought. He begged. Even showed up at the Dursley’s door and got on his hands and knees in front of Petunia, begging for his brother’s son like he had never begged before. She told him if he didn’t get off of her property the police would be called and he would never see Harry again.
Remus told him it was probably best to leave it alone, which led to a huge fight, which led to a sobfest, which led to Sirius accepting that he would talk to Harry when Harry was old enough to understand and he could get through it.
It was still hard though. The group picture of Harry’s first birthday on the mantle haunted him everyday, but he refused to let it get to him. Harry deserved to be loved. Even if he couldn’t be there to feel it.
“Yeah, she is,” Sirius finally whispers. Remus gets closer to him, putting his arms around him and letting Sirius sink in.
They sit in silence until Effie calls from the bathroom that she’s done.
…
Effie didn’t go to sleep until she knew Mary was gone, which wasn’t until 1 a.m. That meant that Sirius had been exhausted with walking back and forth from the living room to Effie’s bedroom each time she called for him, asking if Mary had left yet. Finally, they all decided it wasn’t worth it and Mary departed, promising she’d be back another day.
So, when someone starts banging Sirius’s door down at 2 a.m, Sirius is a little more than pissed. He tries to ignore it at first, hoping he’s dreaming and it might be drifting into reality. But once he hears Remus stir beside him, mumbling a “get the fucking door”, he accepts the fact he isn’t and pulls himself out of bed with a frustrated groan.
He stomps down the stairs and makes his way over to the door. The banging doesn’t stop.
“Jesus fuck!” He yells. “I’m coming. God, what kind of bastard bangs down someone’s door at 2 in the-”
All breath leaves his body as the door swings open and his eyes land on the perpetrator.
The first thing he notices isn’t the busted lip, or the black eye, or the way the boy’s chest is heaving like he’s just run a marathon. It isn’t how young he looks to be out this late at night, or the fact he’s still in pajamas that are much too big for him and practically swallow him whole.
It’s his bright green eyes that are as wide as saucers as he takes Sirius in. It’s the scar that lies on his forehead, reaching down to his eyebrow and stopping just above his eyelid.
“Hi,” the boy breathes. “You’re- you’re Sirius Black right?”
The world is spinning, spinning, spinning and Sirius is sure that he must be dreaming.
“Remus,” Sirius tries to call but barely any sound comes out.
“I mean you look just like him so I’m assuming so. I’m sorry this is so late, but it’s the only time I could get over here and I needed to know.”
“Remus,” once again, this time just a whisper.
“I think you might have been a friend of my parents,” the boy continues, awkwardly scratching the back of his head, where the wildest black curls lie, sticking up in every direction.
He knows exactly who he is. Before he says it, Sirius knows it like a heartbeat.
“I’m Harry Potter.”