The Talk
When he woke up the first thing he wanted to do was get to Sirius and demand an explanation for the bewildering thing his mother said. He rushed to get dressed and without even getting something to eat he went straight ahead to the fireplace.
When he wanted to throw the floo powder he realized a little detail. He didn’t know where Sirius was. Sirius told him before that his uncle was giving him a place to stay but then since he was now back to being the Heir to House Black maybe he was at Grimmauld Place.
Sadly, he knew he couldn’t get into Grimmauld Place without an invitation, it was not a public fireplace after all.
Since he couldn’t find Sirius then he would have to go to someone that might know where Sirius was.
He threw the floo powder with renewed strength and shouted, “Lupin Cottage!”.
When he appeared at the small and neat living room of the shabby cottage, no matter how much he shouted Remus’ name nobody answered.
…………………………..
He was feeling light-headed and dizzy with all the new information. To be an omega? He never really thought about it, he just thought he was a beta and that’s all. He never even imagines a family, for the love of Merlin who would like to pass this blasted disease to another little human being?
He hugged himself closer, pulling his knees to his chest and kept staring to the door with a dazed stare. It was in that embarrassing state that Severus found him.
He knocked the door softly and entered quickly without a response from him. He stood on the door for a few seconds. He had changed so much in just two months after being married to Sirius.
He couldn’t help but stare at him. He was fuller, rounder on the cheeks. The sallow skin was now milky and healthy. Where there used to be a permanent frown there is now an ease that spreads across his face.
His dark eyes, always deep, were now glinting with happiness, a happiness that most probably started once he married his best friend.
Could he be the same maybe if he…?
- Lupin – the velvety voice called him shaking from the stupor he had been in – I’ve brought you clean towels and a pajama.
- Thank you, Severus – he said sheepishly – may I ask you a question?
- You’ve already done it – he sent him an exasperated glare from where he was putting the things in the bed.
- Well, yes, but I mean – he started again.
- I know what you mean, you knit wit. Is this about the matter of Lord Silverclaw? – he hit the bull’s eye directly.
- Well, yes, I mean I guess – he tried to explain but couldn’t find the word right away – You seem to have been through something quite similar and I just wanted – he said with a soft yet steady voice without making eye contact.
- To hear what I went through – he must have seen how earnest he was because he sighed before starting to speak.
- Lupin, do you have money in your name? – he asked mercilessly.
- No, I have not, I only have the cottage where I live but it is my father’s – he explained sincerely.
- Perhaps, do you already have a job to support yourself? – he didn’t relent his pursue.
- No, I’ve got some part-time jobs here and there, but I’ve had to leave due to my problem – he shook his head dejectedly.
- Are you involved in a torrid romance with a girl or a boy already? – he said in a sarcastic tone making him roll his eyes.
- No, I’m not. – he said shortly.
- Then why are you doubting so much? – Severus eyes were lit on fire – People like us have few opportunities in life. We are not born with a silver or golden spoon, maybe not even a wooden one.
I didn’t have much either, I might have had more than you even, because the run-down house I used to live in was my father’s and then he died, all mine – he seemed to smile mockingly to himself – I had no money, no assets, nobody wanted to accept me for my mastery and even if they had I couldn’t pay for it.
When Sirius got me, I was thinking that in just a few days more maybe I wouldn’t even have something to eat. I was not expecting love from Sirius, I really didn’t, he just gave it to me and guess what? – he looked me in the eyes to drive the point home and quietly whispered – I flourished, I’m still flourishing.
You deserve to give this opportunity to yourself. He is a Lord already; he has properties and businesses to take care of you. You don’t need to worry about how to put food on the table anymore.
He must provide you with everything you need and then you’ll be providing him with the only thing he is lacking, some blood heirs.
The best thing about it is, he will never shun you for being what you are, who you are. He is the same. You can rely on him. Maybe you won’t get love like I got from Sirius, but you will have secured a companionship for the rest of your life.
Isn’t that the most important thing? You’ll never be alone again and once you birth a pup for him then he is going to be tied to you forever. This is an honorable position; you’ll be able to stand proud by Sirius and James once the time comes.
Think about it, being Remus Lupin is not enough to survive in this savage world but being Remus Lupin is the only thing you need to be Consort Silverclaw, a wizard, a werewolf, a partner, a mother, a master, whatever you want to be, you’ll be able to be.
At this point, he noticed how cold teardrops were rolling off his face. He already knew he was in a stalemate. He was not thriving in his job, he was afraid of not eating, of being alone, of being forgotten by his friends, of having nothing.
He had noticed how the walls in his cottage seemed to be getting bigger and bigger every day, how the cottage sounded quieter and quieter, he was starting to crumble, and he was getting tired of not knowing what to do. Maybe Severus was right, maybe Sirius was right, and this was the best option.
He was spooked a little bit when Severus reached out to him. He held his hand for a few seconds before sitting down himself and placing his hand in his belly. He was surprised that Severus was allowing such close contact.
-This baby, growing inside me, is half mine and half Sirius’s. It’s ours. It is the irrefutable proof that I belong to this family, nobody can forsake me because I will forever be the mother to this child, the Black family offspring is going to be birthed by me. That deserves respect, recognition, and reward. Everything I’ve been given is what I deserve, and I deserve even more.
You deserve everything too, Remus.