new revelations
James woke the next morning before the sun even rose, he groaned and flopped back onto his bed craving more sleep. An hour later he was still laying desperate for rest. Rest, he was unable to find. He cast a tempus and groaned at the resulting time. 3:37. Far too early to wake up, but unable to reenter the realm of Morpheus, he hauled himself upright and started towards the shower.
He pulled out his transfiguration homework and made for the common room, stopping when he saw Alice in front of the fireplace with her knees pulled to her chest. “Are you okay?” he asked, looking at her slumped over form. Alice started for a second, placing her hand upon her chest in relief when she spotted him.
“Merlin Jamie? You scared me half way to my grave, I’m fine,” she added at the look of concern on his face. James only raised an eyebrow in her direction, reminding her that a year of dating only meant that he was impervious to her bullshit. Allice rolled her eyes and motioned for him to sit beside her. As he did she lay her head on his shoulder and burrowed closer to her for warmth. “I started my period,” she said, sounding exhausted. James winced recalling long days where he had massaged her shoulders or comforted her while she writhed in pain.
“Do you need anything?” he enquired as he applied heating charms. She wordlessly shook her head and after a moment twisted to look at him in confusion.
“What are you doing up now anyways?” James closed his eyes at her enquiry as last night's words flowed through his mind. Aaira had been a friend of his. But how well had he really known her? He hadn’t even known that she tolerated Slytherins, let alone close enough to marry one. He ignored her question, choosing instead to offer her another one.
“Explain betrothals to me,” he requested, if she found his request odd she chose not to mention it, instead summoning a book from her dorm. It landed on James lap and read Marriage and Culture by Druella Black.
“After I explain, read this if you want clarity,” she explained and settled more comfortably into his side. “It’s not exactly an arranged marriage, there is a choice. And more often than not it is the child who requests these things. Most of us set them up in our last year. Sometimes it’s for advantage or more often than not for friendship. Sometimes it’s even for love. Aaira Shafiq and Marcus Rosier are publicly celebrating this summer.”
“I know,” James said feeling slightly guilty, "They had a party for the Ravenclaws and Slytherins last night.” He had thought that betrothals were so much worse than they are, when in fact they were so innocent it was unworthy of the bad name they were given, the bad name that JAmes had very publicly expressed last night.
“James,” Alicd sighed, running a hand over her face in exhaustion, causing another shot of guilt up his spine, “do I want to know why you know that?” James cringed slightly and shook his head in embarrassment, already knowing how disappointed she would be for once again acting like a fucking idiot, and judging too quickly.
“I might have very publicly stated that bethrotals are archaic and disturbing.” Alice closed her eyes in frustration and when she opened them all she could do was groan into her palms.
“Everytime I think you have some modicum of sense you manage to prove me wrong. Why James, why?” she moaned, looking distraught, “ In front of some of the most traditional students in the entire school, why would you insult their culture? Are you a complete imbecile?” She didn’t pause in her admonishment, only inhaled deeply before turning to him and scooting away so she could fully face him.
“I’m sorry Alice,” he breathed, “But you need to realize that to me this is all new. I grew up in a very different household. Hell, I didn’t even know what the sacred 28 were until my Aunt Hermionie cursed them out at a dinner when I was 12. I’m trying, and yes I may be an idiot, I may not think before I speak, but maybe it's time I act a little less Gryffinor in all of this.” His family would have gaped in horror at the words spilling out of James’ mouth but he didn’t hesitate. He let Alice see the plain and honest truth on his face. He was done judging, now it was time to adjust. Just as his pure blooded ancestors had done centuries ago for the muggle borns.
Alice was smiling at him, “Okay Jamie, okay. I’ll help. And for what it’s worth you’re not doing too bad. You’re trying, and just for now that’s enough.” James shot a smile at her but even in all of this he couldn’t forget the sight of the lilac eyes that had plagued him all night.
“I’m going to ask you a question,” he warned, “ and I would appreciate it if you answered it without lecturing me.” Alice raised a weary eyebrow but agreed with a nod. “Aurelia Lestrange, does she have a marriage contract?” Alice didn’t say a word but did nothing to stop the lazy smirk that had appeared on her face as James’ cheeks turned red in embarrassment.
“No, but if anyone is interested they had better move fast, that girl won’t leave Hogwarts without an airtight contract.” James turned away so she couldn’t see the expression on his face. He wasn’t quite sure why the girl had been stuck on his mind. She was everything that his family stood against. And yet just the sight of her had been enough for James to forget his entire world. Without even knowing anything about her here he was learning about her romantic future.
He was utterly fucked.
Two encounters with her had left him wanting, if he truly got closer to Albus, how long would it take for him to fall head over heels? But maybe, there could be something more between them, maybe he could have a chance with her. And wouldn’t that be something.
A few hours later as he sat in the Great Hall eating breakfast James endured Caleb telling yet another person about how Slytherin’s had gotten them kicked out of a party. James had sat quiet, unsure whether to voice the truth. That a Slytherin girl had warned him to reign in his words before the Ravenclaw girl had kicked them out. He was also unsure about Marcus, was he supposed to mention it, or should he ignore it like Caleb was?
If Caleb could get over his hatred of snakes in order to stick his tongue down one of their throats did that mean that it was safe to talk to him about all the Slytherin drama he had going on in his life? Speaking of, what was his goal at this point? He had learned enough of Slytherin to learn that they most certainly hadn’t corrupted his brother, but what was he to do now? Just leave it alone, and accept a life without Albus?
James groaned into his cereal, just two days ago his biggest concern had been finishing his transfiguration essay, and now he was neck-deep in problems with no fucking solutions. Frank nudged him silently and handed him a cup of coffee. James groaned in appreciation as he practically chugged the caffeine.
“So James,” Fred Weasley began with an arm wrapped around James’ shoulders, “I heard you had an encounter with Death Eaters yesterday.” James almost flinched at the insult, feeling conflicted again. Unsure what to do he laughed it off ruffling his sixteen-year-old cousin's hair.
“Yeah, it was horrifying,” he bantered back, “I don’t even want to know why Hogwarts still lets them into this school, wouldn’t it just be easier to directly transfer them to Azkaban?” As the Gryffindors roared in laughter around him and he heard various cries of ‘Good one Jamie.’ he caught a glimpse of her leaning on the wall across him. Close enough to hear the words he had just uttered.
Aurelia just stared at him, and he knew enough of Slytherins to know that he could only see the pain and betrayal that gleamed in her eyes because she had wanted him to see. Had wanted him to know that she had honestly considered him not to be an asshole before this. He didn’t know why but that thought had a strange effect on his heart and he could feel it sink like a dead weight when she pulled the mask back on her emotions and walked away surrounded by a posse of Slytherins. James had a ridiculous urge to call after her and explain himself, he resisted knowing that it would be no good. Slytherins were proud, much like Gryffindors. And they were loyal to the death. James hadn’t yet been offered that loyalty, but she had stood up for him, hidden him, and helped him blend in the previous night. What had he done in return? Act like an asshole and like her offer of silent friendship hadn’t meant anything.
He was an utter and complete asshole.
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James had been on the way back from Potions when he saw it. A first-year Slytherin boy silently cried on the floor as boils rose to his skin. James cringed in horror, not unused to the sight of yearmates trying out spells on each other only for it to go horribly wrong. What he saw made his blood run cold. Because it clearly hadn’t been an accidental spell from a fellow friend. No, it had been a seventh-year Gryffindor girl. Maya Fendyr, his mind unconsciously supplied. His gut churned and as nausea rose in his gut he looked to his friends, to commiserate with the unjust actions. Only to find that they hadn’t noticed. If anything that was worse. Because if they hadn’t noticed, how many times had it been James? James had never bullied any of the younger Slytherins. But if he had kept his head down and left it unacknowledged was that not the same?
If it wasn’t for his recent Slytherin interests, would he even care?
No, his mind supplied, you wouldn’t not care but you would never have even realized it.
Just as he was contemplating stepping forward and hexing Maya, someone did that for him. As he looked up he could see Albus and Scorpius pointing their wands at Maya, her wand lying on the floor away from her. A wordless expelliarmus, James realized, unaware that either of the boys could accomplish wordless spells to that degree. Next to the kid was Aurelia who was quietly muttering healing spells underneath her breath.
“Leave,” Albus demanded coldly, uncaring of the crowd amassed around them “And don’t you dare touch one of our snakes again Fendyr.” Maya gave an unsteady laugh and shot a final sneer before storming out from the corridor. As Aurelia ushered the kid away to a seventh-year Slytherin, Al handed her a corked tonic. A Pepper Up Potion, James realized to replace the lost energy from the healing. Aurelia downed it in a quick motion and caught James’ eye. With a quick glance at Al who was resolutely avoiding James’ gaze, in shame James realized in dismay Al was ashamed of him, “Go along Al,” she encouraged, “I’ll deal with the rest of these lions.”
Albus only gave her an amused look before sweeping out from the room with Scorpius in tow. Aurelia only stared straight back at him and raised one perfectly sculpted brow at the gaggle of his friends surrounding him. “You go along,” he found himself saying as he stared into her lilac eyes, “I’ll catch up.”
“Are you sure mate?” Frank asked cautiously, looking ready to bolt before he answered. James only nodded in confirmation, unable to break his gaze from those eyes of her. In a few seconds, the two of them were blissfully alone.
Aurelia walked towards him with an almost predatory glint in her eyes, she walked so close that he could smell her fucking perfume. Jasmine and vanilla he realized belatedly, as she trailed a finger up his forearms where he had rolled the sleeves up.
“Do you like that?” she asked with a smirk when she caught his sharp inhale. James hummed quietly not even noticing his surroundings as she brought her own body closer and closer to his until her chest brushed his. He had to stop himself from groaning at the sensation. “I’m sure you do sweetheart,” she crooned lightly into his ear. She was on her toes and as she leaned over to whisper into James’ ear he had to stop himself from pulling her closer and wrapping his arms around her waist. “Well, stop,” she commanded, “because we need to talk.” James pulled away abruptly at her words and turned away from her, focusing on his breathing for a few seconds until his heart rate returned to normal. He nodded at her to go on, feeling like every time he opened his mouth in front of her he was making a fool of himself.
“When we were in first year,” she began, “a seventh-year Gryffindor cursed us, Albus, Scorpius, and me. A cutting curse. It wasn’t really targeted for the boys. Mainly for me. It slashed my neck open. They barely got me back to the common room on time. I could have died.” She paused waiting for his reaction and when he continued to stare at her she slightly shifted the diamond choker he had always seen her wearing. In its place was a thin grisly white scar. James opened his mouth, about to say what he didn’t know but before he could she continued.
“Second year, Albus and Marcus were walking back to the dorm after a late dinner, they got jumped by a Hufflepuff. He cast sectumsempra. It barely hit Albus, because Marcus shoved the Hufflepuff. But Albus got a concussion. He could barely remember his own name.” James could feel the nausea rising in his own throat. Merlin, his brother, could have died.
“Third year is a pivotal time for Slytherins,” Aurelia continued, no mercy on that beautiful face, “It’s when we realize that we need to look after ourselves. Because no one else will fucking do it. Because to anyone else we’re future death eaters. Oh what is it you said, deserving of a place in Azkaban? Exactly that, by third year we don’t get cursed anymore, because now we curse first. We’re practically healers by now because we had to patch ourselves up and our seniors taught us. Because they went through the same damn thing.”
James didn’t know what it was, the story about Al or just everything but he couldn’t stand it anymore. As nausea rose in his throat he dropped his bag to the floor and raced for the nearest bathroom. He went crashing on his knees in front of the toilet barely able to see anything but Al young and in pain, so much like that 11 year old boy today. He retched hard and gasped when a hand smoothed along his bath. Aurelia didn’t say anything, just rubbed his back and offered him a cup of water when he finished.
James panted, leaning his head against the wall all he could think of was Al’s green eyes welled with tears, or Scorpius clutching his bleeding friend. Even that Slyhtherin boy who was so fucking young, who had committed no crime except for being sorted into a fucking house. A house that was despised, a boy who had committed no crime save for going to school.
“I didn’t tell you that to be cruel,” was all Aurelia said as she leaned onto the wall beside him. “I told you because all of you others think that you’re innocent just because you don’t bully the younger Slytherins. But what you do is worse. Because you see it, you acknowledge it and then none of you do a damn thing to fix it or even help. You just watch.” Her voice broke on the last word, no doubt in her remembrance of her own traumatic memories. This girl besides him was different from the one he had met at the Quidditch pitch, or even at the party. Here she was out of her element and simply trying to make this Gryffindor boy understand just a little of his own brother’s life.
“I thought that you lot corrupted Albus,” was all he could say with his hoarse voice,”I thought that he was becoming dark and that he needed to spend time with some Gryffindors. I thought that Slyhterin was the worst thing in the world for him,” his words rang hollow as James acknowledged the utter stupidity in them.
“And what do you think now?” If she had any opinions about his own thoughts she didn’t offer them, content to sit and watch him come to his own conclusions.
“I think that I was an idiot,” he stated bluntly, aware of the smirk that had spread across her face at his words, “I think that Slytherin is the best thing that could have ever happened to him and that I’m a fool for not seeing it.”
“That sounds about right,” she commented, looking like she didn’t have a care in the world. James had to admit that it was very hot. Watching as her black hair curled around her ears, and how her lilac eyes shone in the dim lighting, James became aware of a sensation that was very different from his previous devastation. She was wearing a low cut skirt that had slid up and he could see the smooth line of her thigh as it curved outwards. James gulped, hating how his body reacted to her.
“I also think,” James decided in an attempt to distract himself from the very tempting girl beside him, “That I want to try to get Al to forgive me. And that I’ll learn about the Old Ways.” Aurelia gave him a blinding smile as she helped haul him from the floor.
“That sounds good,” she remarked with a soft smile. It lasted for about a second but James could have sworn that he’d seen the sun, and felt strangely dismayed when it had disappeared. Her normal smirk replaced it, “See you around Potter,” she said as she walked to the door.
“Thank you Aurelia,” he called back. She only sent him a smirk back.
“Call me Gwen, it’s what most people call me.” If she had lingered a moment longer she would have seen the absolutely ridiculous smile on the face of James Sirius Potter.
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“I’m full in,” he told Alice later that night, “Anything and everything about wizarding culture, about the Old Ways, I’m here and ready to listen.” Alice and Frank exchanged confused glances and Frank reached out to grip his shoulder and pulled James’ head around in order to meet his eyes.
“Do you understand what you’re saying mate,” he said as his blue eyes met James’ hazel eyes, “You’re saying that you want to be one of us, that you’re willing to go against your family in this, that you’re willing to be presented in front of wizarding society.” James avoided the uncomfortable thought of going against his own family and settled for remembering Al’s face when he had been a chubby three year old. This was for his brother, this was for so many of the kids that James hadn’t acknowledged and inadvertently harmed by doing so. This was even about Aurelia. This was about the kids who were dismissed and abused and set aside. All for the color of their ties. There was nothing wrong in protecting one’s own culture and he knew enough of the old school Slytherins to know that the new one’s had no such opinions. Or even if they did they were nowhere near as strong as that of their parents.
But he would learn, he would learn everything he promised himself. “Presented?” he asked as he wrenched himself from his own thoughts.”
“Presented as in an introduction to the society, at a ball mostly, but you need an invitation to those, most teenagers are presented through their own families.” Alice explained.
“How would I get an invitation?”
“You’re brother gets them,” Frank said easily, “You could just go with him.”
“Two problems with that,” he replied, “One as of now Al still hates me, and two there’s no way our house gets those sorts of invites. My parents would burn them as they came.”
“But Al attends a good amount of events,” Alice argued, “He’s probably getting these invitations and simply hiding them.” James nodded, that was probably what had happened. His parents were extremely anti nobility. Strangely enough not most of his family was with the exception of his parents, grandparents, and Aunt Hermione. Uncle Ron and the rest of them had always looked uncomfortable when the others started to discuss those matters, or make fun of the rituals purebloods tended to favor.
Yule, Samhain, Autumn and Summer Equinox had only ever existed to him in the words of scoffs and insults. But perhaps now they would become something more. Now perhaps they would become his. The thought appealed to him and as he leaned back against the sofa amidst Frank and Alice’s chatter about purchasing him a new wardrobe he abruptly found himself thinking about courting traditions. His mind flashed to the book Alice had lent him. He hadn’t opened it yet.
Perhaps it was time too, especially as a certain dark haired Slytherin seemed to appreciate taking away his personal space.
As he contemplated this he vaguely heard Alice and Frank discussing potential events to drag him along too. “I could bring him to Lilah Carrow and James Warrington’s wedding,” she was saying, “But I already promised Connor Greengrass that he could escort me.”
“I could escort him,” Frank offered. James snapped out of his thoughts at those words and turned to give Frank an incredulous look. “What are you looking so offended for?” Frank asked, looking amused, “You could do a lot worse than me.”
James made a face at him, “I could not, I’ll have you know that when girls see me they can barely reist themselves.”
Frank laughed at him before continuing, “I normally take Lorcan, but he gets invited anyways so you could come as my plus one but not my date.” James considered his words before snapping his head back to Frank.
“Lorcan?” he asked incredulously, “As in Lorcan Scammader Aunt Luna’s son?” Merlin, he hadn’t even known that his Aunt Luna was a part of wizarding noble society.
“Well his mom is first cousins with Draco Malfoy,” Alice pointed out.
“What?”James interjected, feeling like someone had slapped him with a box of revelations in the past few days.
Frank looked at him and began to talk so slowly, one would think that he was explaining to a child, “Pandora Lovegood, Aunt Luna’s mother was Pandora Malfoy before her marriage, sister of Lucius Malfoy. The families remained close despite the wars.”
“That’s a lot,” James said ruffling his hair as his eyes weighed down in sudden exhaustion. Alice and Frank gave him pitying looks as Frank held out a hand to haul him up. James took it gratefully, groaning at the aches left over from Quidditch practice.
“It’s no problem mate,” Frank said as they said their goodbyes to Alice. “We always thought that you had no interest in learning any of this stuff. We would have helped earlier if we had known. A lot of us would have.”
“How many of you exactly follow the old ways?” James inquired as he collapsed onto his bed, already barefoot as he was used to at home.
“A lot of us just know to hide it.” James had been half asleep but he still caught Frank’s last words as he fell asleep. “You might save us all, I know you’re asleep but please don’t disappoint us Jamie.” James fell asleep to the thought and dreamt of a pair of violet eyes.