Explanation, kinda..
I smiled, not a happy smile, but one I knew always scared my fellow critters. I needed to know my position and what was going on, what better way of knowing that than from a kitty who was bad at hiding in this small space?
I started to look around, started to truly take in my surroundings. I can't lie, he made the place look nice. Like a small hideout you'd expect from children, but cleaner, like our sleepovers before The Hour of Joy.
That realization hurt. It was like he was trying to relive our days before all.. this.
I looked back at my friends, soundly sleeping as the once smallest of us was trying to hide and take care of us. While simultaneously trying to appease his god.
"Ugh.." I groaned, this was hurting my head.
We were split into sections. We all laid on the same cushion that had no sheet, and had our own little domes that surrounded us. Like little huts that described who we were. Kickin had his pendent necklace displayed at the top, his basketball, soccer ball, and his little nicknacks like his favorite mug and whatnot. Crafty was in the same boat, her pendent on display, her crayons, color pencils, paint, and notebook were all in her little den. Bubba had his pendent, his homework he never finished along with his pencils and journals. Picky had her cooking utensils, measuring cups and bowls around her. And even.. mine. I didn't have a lot of stuff, what he did bring me, was my own teddy bear.
"So specific.." I mumbled, noting the small Tmph sound I heard from above.
So.. this is what he was choosing to do. He was watching me while I was analyzing my surroundings.
'Acting like a cat.' I thought, we almost entirely stopped acting like our respective animals when we weren't in front of the kids, but some habits stuck with us the more time went on.
Bubbas intelligence and scarily good memory, Pickys ability to eat anything, Kickins prefered taste for nuts, Hoppys speed and need to.. well—hop— DogDays wagging tail and love for fetch, my need to hibernate every winter, Catnaps purring and.. habit of 'hunting'.
When he hunted, he always concealed himself the best he could, always stared, always watched, and even though it wasn't always malicious, I knew he was doing it right now. The question was, where? I won't be able to find him, even in this small space, I also can't force him out, I'm not strong like DogDay—whos proven capable of dragging him—and I wasn't smart like Bubba who would come up with a way to convince him to come ou–.
Convince him to come out.. That's it!
If I couldn't convince him, then I'll do the next best thing! I'll lure him out.
Before we often treated his hunting as if it were a game. We would pick a snack and which ever he felt like having he'd appear and take it, who got him out first won. But they're weee other ways—Kickin was the first to try this—like provoking him. Threatening to touch the spot he just cleaned, threatening to knock over his cup of milk or even as far as enter his home without invitation. It wasn't very nice so we forced Kickin to stop doing it, but right now I don't care about being nice. And if getting answers risks me getting hurt, then I'll gladly do it.
I glanced over at a certain pipe and smiled. It's obvious he's hiding us. We wouldn't be in such a dark, small space with no way out but one narrow, circular pipe if he wasn't hiding us. The thought of leaving honestly scared me. I didn't know what was on the other end of that pipe, but that smaller critter definitely helps ease my worries. If such a small creature was able to leave and not get hurt, then wouldn't I have a better chance?
I stepped closer to the pipe, ignoring the low growls from my hiding friend. If he wants to stop me, then he needs to either talk or come down here himself. The closer I inched to the pipe, the louder his growls became—he's warning me—. I knew that, I knew he was telling to step away from it, I knew he was inching closer as well, and I also knew if push comes to shove— I could hopefully take him down with me.
Once I was right in front of the pipe I could actually take in it's appearance. Despite the glow in the dark stars on the ceiling of what I can only assume is a bunker, there isn't actually a good light source. So I couldn't really get a good look at it. It was a dark blue ish grey in the shape of a circle. It had a latch that I didn't notice before, covering the hole I saw the smaller critter disappear into. I reached for the latch and pulled it down, it took more strength than I thought it would need and opened with a loud scraping sound. The metal was probably rusting by this point, how it could still open was beyond me.
I stared at the gaping, pitch black hole in front of me, and wished I just stayed laying on the soft cushion. I was so engrossed in the path that I was sure was leading to my actual death that I failed to notice the growling had stopped. It was only when I was about to step in did I remember my very agitated friend was watching my every move.
I felt a sudden shove and stumbled back in surprise, my arms flailing and trying to balance myself before I fell to the ground. I looked up at the thing—the cat—that pushed me away so urgently. His whole body aside from his paws were in darkness as he somehow managed to balance himself enough to sit on the pipe. All I could see other than his paws was his tail swaying back in forth behind and his eyes. If he was only fearful before—he definitely wasn't now—.
"AREYOUOUTOFYOURMIND." He shouted in a whisper, his tail swishing behind him faster in anger.
He grabbed the lever and picked it up faster than I thought was possible. It slammed shut so loud I flinched, hell, even he flinched and he was the one who used such force to close it. I stared at him in disbelief. I had so many questions—to many questions—that I knew I would never get out of him at this rate.
"Catnap." I called, raising my hands to try to not seem threatening.
Not sure why I have to seem less threatening, but I have to calm him down.
He looked at me confused, and slowly came down from the top of the pipe. His paws lightly touching the floor without a sound. He truly is good at stealth. His image was becoming more and more visible as he inched closer. The closer he got, the more I could see how.. odd he looked to me. It was weird seeing my friend after what happened in a similar light than when he didn't betray us. It hurt as well, but I knew I couldn't spend my time being hurt or sympathizing with him.
"Doyourealizehowdangerousitisout—"
"Dangerous?" I interrupted, completely throwing out the plan I had of not seeming threatening.
He looked taken aback and took a step back, his ears retreating against his head like earlier. He looked like he caught what I was implying yet I continued, "The only 'dangerous' thing here to me is you, Catnap." I spat, my face contourting into what I knew was a snarl.
He didn't respond and only stared at me with that same large grin, yet his eyes seemed almost guilty.
"Do you know the last thing I remember, Catnap?" I asked, not expecting him to answer, yet he tried.
"I—"
"Shut. Up."
He leaned back a bit as I stepped closer. He kept looking at me and then looking down at my feet to see if I was coming closer.
"Fuck, Catnap. What is going on?" I asked, my voice cracking at the end.
I felt my eyes burn, but bit my lip to prevent showing any kind of vulnerability in front of him. He didn't respond. All he did was reach his paw towards me, maybe to comfort me in his own odd way, but he pulled back when I flinched at his paw.
I continued my rant despite his already dejected face making me feel guilty, "Why am I alive? Why is everyone alive and asleep? Where is Hoppy? Where is DogDay? Where are we? Why do I have such a vivid memory of you tearing me apart when I am perfectly fine?!" All the questions I had thought I would ask so confidently, so calmly, came out in so fast and with tears running down my cheeks.
I wasn't even able to ask about "Miles" before I just started crying. I didn't fall to the ground, I wasn't that upset, but I was crying enough to start shaking. Catnap, in his infinite wisdom, quickly came forward, his paws hovering over my arms, too hesitant to touch me but to worried—it seemed—to just leave me alone.
He eventually grabbed me gently, guiding me to the nearest wall before letting go and leaving me to slide down that same wall to the floor. He hovered over me for only a minute longer before stepping away and creating a three foot distance I've never been more grateful for.
I cried for what seemed like hours. The memories came rushing back to fast for my liking. The good ones, the sad ones, the ones about building our friendship, the full extent of the experimentation, that damn THINGS sweet lies, the screams of everything I held dear ringing in my ear, only to see those same people I morned for the last few minutes of my life sleeping peacefully only five feet from me. Their howling screams and pleas for help haunted me even in what I was sure was death, and Catnaps footsteps sounded so much heavier than I remembered at the time.
Everything. I knew everything that led to that point, but what about the things that led to this point.
I breathed in, wiping away the stray tears that didn't seem to want to leave, and finally looked my old friend in the eyes. Just like how he looked at us on that day.
I know now that he different look that day, not one of hate or distain like I believed in the moment, but a look of uncertainty. Like he wasn't sure if what he was doing was the correct thing to do, yet he was too brainwashed to properly question it before it was too late.
Once I was sure I finished I sniffled one more time before asking him again, "Catnap, what is going on?" My voice was steadier than I truly felt, but it made me happy I was able to calm down.
He was sat three feet away, quietly watching my breakdown parallel to me. I didn't look at him when I asked, I only stared at his tail and how paws, which were so still I could have mistakened them for a statue.
"TheendofPlaytime.Co." His voice was the same staticky, broken tune, yet it somehow gave me a sense of reassurance.
I raised an eyebrow at him and he seemed to panic a little, "Like.. It'sabandoned–kinda.."
"Kinda..?"
"Abandonedbythepeople, butnotthe toys." He explained, kinda.
I was staring at him hard, but he was averting his gaze to look at a very interesting corner that was filled with dust.
I nooded, "Ok.." I said.
I waited for him to continue but he just stared at me confused. We waited in silence before he spoke, "Um.. Is thatallyou wanted—"
"Oh, shit, wait no–" I tripped over my words a bit as he looked at me concerned.
I sighed, embarrassment flushing my face before I asked another question, "Where are we?"
"Anabandoned.. hiding spotyoucouldcallit. Icamehere toescapethekidswhentheywouldyank mytail. The Doctorwasplanningtouseitforaprivateexperimentbut just.. didn't. SoIuseditformyownpurpose." He explained, waving his paw around slightly as he pointed out little things about it I didn't take into account before.
The only one way entrance and exit being the pipe, the spots in the corners where cameras were supposed to be what were torn out, the tables attached to the wall that were obviously meant to strap the kids down.. Damn. I need to work on my observation skills.
No wonder we could never find him at times.
"Ok, then that," I pointed to my friends still lying still against the cushion, "Explain." I demanded.
He glanced at them and then back at me before answering, "BeforeTheHourofJoytheDoctormessed withmy.. smoke," He said, pointing to his throat, I nodded as he continued, "It wasagainstLeithPierre'swishes, but hestilldidit, hetoldmehewantedtoseeifwecouldtry tohelp.. grieving parents." He looked like he wasn't convinced at all as he was talking, letting me know he didn't believe him at all in that moment.
I made a face, "Grieving parents?" I asked sarcastically.
He nodded and continued, "Forthechildrenwhowerein painovertheirtreatmentsoradiseasethathadnocure. Hecameupwiththeideaofputtingthemto rest without killingthem, butmorelikeacomastatewherethey wouldhaveonelastgooddreambeforetheypassed."
"Sure." I said, the sarcasm wasn't directed at him, but more at the reason Doctor Soyer used to change his smoke without his bosses knowledge.
"And how many times did you actually use this for that reason?" I asked, my arms crossed over and resting on my chest.
"Two."
"Out of?"
"..Ten."
"Figured as much. Anyway, next question," I sighed, waving my paw at the discovery of Doctor Soyer possibly using Catnaps new smoke as a security measure, regardless, I didn't really wanna know, "How long has it been since.. you know." I gestured around.
I wasn't really sure what I was asking, but I had to know a timeline to something if not everything.
"It'sbeentenyearssinceTheHourofJoy—"
"I beg your pardon." I interrupted, my mouth agape.
"... It'sbeenten—"
"Catnap, I heard you, I just–" I closed my mouth before I could get more irritated.
I covered my face with my paw and sighed. Catnap looked completely confused, as if me not accepting the fact it's been ten years immediately was odd.
'Its been a decade.. a whole decade since he put us to sleep and has been.. taking care of us I guess you could say.' I thought, already hating the overwhelming sense of pity I feel towards this stupid and gullible cat.
"Ok, ok, so.." I hesitated before continuing with the question I dreaded the most, "Are you still that things servant?"
I watched his face as closely as I could, trying to see if he would show any inkling of emotion that would tell me his answer beforehand, but all that I got was a blank stare. It was like he just froze, he wasn't saying anything, his eyes weren't moving at, his tail stiff on the floor, and he didn't even look like he was breathing.
"Catnap..?" I called him, debating if I should try and walk over to touch him, but I knew that wasn't a good idea.
Catnap, even before the planning of The Hour of Joy, never really liked to be touched if he didn't know you well. Even the kids were usually on thin ice. Every single one of us would beg him to at least let them pet him to keep them from crying or throwing a fit in front of everyone. He would never pay attention to our pleas, so if that wouldn't work, it would turn to bribery, and if Pickys cookies weren't convincing enough, we'd get DogDay.
DogDay was always the most popular critter out of all of us. So we never bothered him with Catnaps petty antics unless we needed to. Hell sometimes even just the mention of getting him would make Catnap behave. DogDay was also the only one who got the freedom of touching him without his verbal permission. One of the other big body toys didn't listen.. he unfortunately lost an eye—it was one of the nightmare critters—.
I broke out of my thoughts at the sound of him shifting away from me. I looked at him confused, which only made him look away in shame. His smile had dropped only by a small amount, but enough to be noticeable. Shit.
He looked so guilty, and that told me all I needed to know.
"WHAT is wrong with you—"
"Idon'thaveachoice."
I was taken aback, immediately shutting my mouth at his absurd statement.
"You don't have a choice? You've had more of a choice than any of us!" I exclaimed, memories of my eavesdropping on his talk with DogDay came flooding back.
"Moon, I'm telling you, he can't be trusted. And at this point–neither can Poppy! He's using you and it hurts seeing it be so blatant with you not noticing!"
He's been saying the same thing for over thirty minutes now. I know he said he was willing to talk for hours if it meant convincing him, but I didn't think he was serious.. He was damn near pleading for this cat to listen.
"He isn't using me! He saved me, and this plan will save the rest of us as well. Why can't you trust my judgement on this?"
His voice box was damaged, and despite what he said about the Prototype caring about him, he had yet to help him fix it.
"Because he doesn't take anyone into consideration but himself! He's selfish– dangerous, and the fact he's already showing what he is capable of no–now that the doctor is turned into one of us–" He was tripping over his words, something he did when he angry but trying to control himself, "PROVES he doesn't care about anyone!" He shouted, unintentionally letting out a short but deep growl, breathing harder than normal for a second before closing his mouth and looking at the floor in frustration.
I was debating if I should get involved. I knew DogDay would never hurt Catnap— he'd hate himself for the rest of his life if he had— but I knew where this always led. Once one voice was raised, the others voice raising was bound to happen, and them screaming at each other was not going to solve anything. It was only going to push them further apart and the Prototype would get what he wanted. He would have Catnap completely under his disgusting—probably rusting—old hand.
Yet to my surprise, Catnap only looked surprised and honestly, convinced. He had lowered himself and gone quiet. DogDay didn't get mad easily, and when he did it was always for a good reason, and in this case, it was because he was worried for the cat in front of him.
DogDay stood, while Catnap was sitting. He had for some reason started only crawling recently, it was apparently so he wouldn't hit his head—which did happen a few times— but everyone had come to the same assumption. The Prototype had been drilling into his head that it would make him more agile, quicker, make it easier to kill the scientist and guards at Playtime.co.
"It's– it's so gross.. it's like he's trying to domesticate him!" Crafty exclaimed, her face contourting into an expression I hadn't ever seen from her before.
I hated it too, he didn't act more cat like than he already was, but it was disturbing how much the Prototype was was able to control Catnap.
They were both drowned in silence for some time before Catnap was the one who broke it, "I'm sorry, Sun, I'll take your words into consideration, because I know you care, and.. think about it." He honestly looked a little hurt but still apologized, his tail wrapping around his paws and ears flat against his head.
DogDay perked up, his once scrunched up face due to frustration had relaxed. He looked hopeful that he was finally getting to him, even if just a little bit, and I was thankful too.
"That's all I'm asking for, thank you, Moon." He smiled, a kind of relief on his face I haven't seen in awhile, his tail wagging happily behind him.
DogDay closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around him. Catnap didn't hesitate to hug back, his tail sneakily wrapping around DogDays arm and his ears perked back up to what they usually look like as he nuzzled his face into the dogs neck.
I placed my head against the wall and sighed with relief. I knew if this were anyone else Catnap would have stopped listening within the first five minutes, but it was DogDay, our last resort, and it worked. I smiled and rubbed my eyes, trying not to laugh at Catnaps unusually loud purring in the room behind me. DogDay was probably petting hi—
"Pst! Bobby!"
I paused and rolled my eyes, turning to see Kickin hiding around the corner.
Soon Pickys head pooped in, next was Hoppy who was at the other corner, parallel to Kickin, then Crafty with her usual worried expression, and finally–Bubba, who looked forced to tag along.
"Well? How'd it go?" Kickin whispered, gesturing to the room next to me that I was planning to inch away fromto not get caught.
I glanced back inside to see the obviouslovebirds who just didn't want to tell us yet in their own little world. Catnap had started licking DogDays face, probably in an attempt to groom him since right before their talk DogDay was playing in the dirt with the kids, and DogDay was happily letting him, smiling so bright it hurt to look.
I turned back to my fellow critters, noticed the worried look on their faces and felt bad to keep them waiting. I gave them a thumbs up with a smile. Their faces all visibly relaxed as they sighed. They started to slowly come towards me and try to glance into the room—aside from Bubba who left after getting his confirmation—but I started pushing them back down the hall to their dismay. I had forgotten they were also seeing this stressful situation play out day by day, how Catnap had been distancing himself from us and the fear we had of the Prototypes already destructive tyranny.
How the other toys didn't notice, we weren't sure.
Bubba had a theory though, that they all had something in common—they were angry.
Catnap included, his resentment was always visible on his face along with the other toys who were following the Prototype, "He's using their anger as a means to control them." Was what he had decided. I think Bubbas theory is spot on, and so does the rest of us critters. We can't stop all the toys of Playtime.co, we can't stop the scientists, we can't stop Leith Pierre. But, we can at least stand by what we believe is right, and our main focus is that everyone stays safe, that's all—
"Nosies."
I flinched hearing that normally jolly voice that sounded quite the opposite, right behind me. I whipped my head around to be met face to face with DogDay. My hands gripped Kickins shoulder, not because I was scared of DogDays pissed off expression, but because I knew this damn chicken would try to run, and I was right.
"For God's sakes. I had it under control. I didn't need you'll watching, you know Catnap can't get sentimental with a crowd watching, what if he saw you'll and it didn't turn out as well as it did?" He scolded us, his arms crossed across his chest.
Me and Kickin apologized, we both noticed in that moment how our other friends had escaped when they could.
I could tell Kickin was about to tattle, but DogDay beat him to it, "And I know the others were here too, I could hear and smell you'll. Thankfully Catnaps only focus was me and he didn't notice your presence, but next time you plan to spy, don't try whispering, Kickin." He warned.
I held in my laugh as Kickin looked distraught that it was his fault we got caught.
I bit my lip. He had so many chances. So many promises that we were here for him, and still chose a fucking hand over us.
"Oh? Explain to me how you have no—"
"He—HEHaSDoGDaY!" He exclaimed, his voice broke as he said those three words.
I could have sworn he had tears in his eyes before he forced them away by facing away from me. I was silent, I didn't know what to say. It was obvious that Catnap didn't want the Prototype to have him, but I couldn't put it past him to be the reason he did have him.
"..How?"
"ItwasafterIusedmysmoke. AfterIputyouall.. to sleep." He was hesitating, and I couldn't afford that.
"And?"
"Hepromisedmehewouldn'tharmanyofyou. Just.. reformyouall, becauseIbelievedyoualltobewrong." He kept stopping, and I was getting progressively more annoyed.
"That doesn't answer how he got his disgusting hands on DogDay!" I shouted, he flinched and back away more.
I felt a sharp pain in my chest at what I assumed was shame, regret or maybe even fear, either way, it didn't answer my question.
"I—Itestedhim."
I raised an eyebrow.
"Hetoldmetobringyourbodiestohim, Ibroughthim lookalikes, andhe—" He stopped and his breath sucked in.
It surprised me more than I thought at the sight in front of me. I have never seen Catnap cry. Not once. And seeing it now only confused me to my core.
I waited for him to gather himself before prodding him to speak, "..What did he do?" I asked, he didn't respond right away, he just kept staring at the floor with tears running down his once exaggerated smile that was now a frown.
"Hegetheredyourlookalikesin oneareaandstabbed throughthem."
I couldn't speak. I couldn't move. I couldn't even look at him, it took us 'dying' to his god for him to snap out of it?
"And DogDay?"
He lowered himself to the ground more, his tears slowly coming to stop, "AfterIhidyoualldownhereIwent lookingforHoppyandDogDaytohidethemtoo, but whenIfoundDogDay.. hewasrightfullyangryanddidn't listen. Itdidn'thelpthatthePrototypehadbeenfollowing mymovementswithoutmyknowledge."
I waited, my breathing becoming unsteady even with my efforts to soothe myself.
"Idisobeyedhiminthatmoment, ashetoldmeto capturehim, butIpushedhimintotheroomclosettous andlockedusinside. Everythingmovedfasterfrom there, hewasconfusedandIdidn'tknowhowtoexplain, thiswasbeforeIknewofthePrototypescapabilitiesof gettingaroundPlaytime.co." His breath hitched slightly at the retelling, if only I knew how worse it was going to get.
"Theceilingopenedandbeforeeitherofuscouldreact hegrabbedhimbythechest. IactedinanywayIcould, I latched ontoto hisbodyandheldontoanythingonthe floorIcould. ThatwasthefirsttimeIhadseenhimin months," he was starting to breath heavily, his once calmed tears came pouring out faster than before, "He washoldingontometoo, hewasscaredandIknowI scratchedhimbyaccidentbyhowhardIwasholdingon, butIstillwasn'tabletokeephimfrom takinghim."
And there it was.
Catnap just unraveled, he was wailing like a child and his words had become incoherent. I was still processing everything, but my body acted on it's own. I jumped up from the wall and forced him into an embrace. I could tell he didn't want me to ask he had two weak attempts at pushing me away, but eventually gave up and just cried into my shoulder.
I hated him. I hated how he chose the Prototype over us. I hated how he couldn't manage to protect DogDay. I hate how despite everything I still trust him. Yet I know better than anyone that he still cares for us. That he was manipulated. That he already had abandonment issues due to his parents and clung to anything that gave him just the right amount of reassurance. But what I hate most of all, is the Prototype.
I won't excuse Catnaps actions, he'll need to do a lot to earn my forgiveness. But right now we can't fight with the only things we have left.
We need to find a way out that keeps everyone safe.